A/N: My promise to each of you is that I will not upload a LouisxMary chapter without having a FrancisxMary chapter ready to go along with it!
Mary had calmed down by the time she made it to the main hall, but she still planned to go for a walk around the deserted corridors to help clear her head. A relationship with Louis. True, she had entertained the idea. She had allowed herself to think of how simple her relationship with him could be. She could see it in his eyes and their few clandestine meetings left her with a desire to be closer to him. She had told him, just as she told Francis that it would not work. It could not work. She would not allow it to happen. But with Francis' blessing, with the protection of the king. No! She couldn't. If it were discovered, it wouldn't matter who had prior knowledge or who had given her permission to do so, it would mean Louis' head and a drastically different life for her if not also her execution. Her people, the Scottish people of a strong Catholic faith would also want her toppled for the adultery. It could not happen.
Still, the idea nagged at her. What if they could overcome the obstacles? What if Francis was true to his word and the two of them exercised the utmost care? Could she lie to Louis about the plans he would tell her? Could she extract information without arousing suspicion and then turn around and feed it all to Francis? Could she betray her husband with her lover in the bedroom and betray her lover with her husband in the throne room? She would never have thought herself capable, but this wouldn't really be information about Louis. This would be about Antoine. Antoine, Mary despised. She found his ethics to be lacking, she found his manners to be just on this side of too bold in all the wrong situations, and she didn't trust any of his words about his dealings with Elizabeth. This information would be invaluable to her and Francis' reign if she could bring herself to do it. Besides, nothing that she learned would actually affect Louis. He was a good man, loyal to France even if he disliked Francis. Nothing she could pass on would be harmful to him. Francis would see that sooner than later.
Looking up to take stock of her surroundings, she wasn't entirely shocked to realize that her feet had taken her to the wing of the castle where guests of the crown stayed. She was mere meters from Louis' door. Taking a deep breath in, she approached the imposing wood and knocked.
While awaiting his answer, she entertained the idea of running away, but she reasoned that he would answer the door, see her retreating form and call after her, which would be even more embarrassing. So she tapped her foot and waited for the door to open.
When the door failed to open, Mary realized that Louis must still be at the party Kenna had been planning for Antoine. Of course he would be. If she and Francis hadn't planned what they had for tonight, the two of them would have been in attendance as well. Knowing that he would not likely be back for a few hours at the least, Mary planned to return to her room and grab her cloak so that she could go outside for a walk. All she could do was to hope that Francis would not still be there by the time she got back.
As luck would have it, Francis had gone. Whether he had retreated to his own chambers or had changed his attire to attend the party, Mary didn't know. And honestly, she had a hard time feeling like she could care.
As much as it pained her to think of the passion from her marriage being extinguished entirely, she felt that she had to admit that it was. She felt no ill will toward Francis, but she knew that the flame of their love wasn't what it used to be. She would not betray her people- Scottish or French- no matter how she felt about Francis. Her people and her duty would have to come first. She desperately needed to speak with Louis. He had no idea that she even reciprocated his feelings and would likely be shocked when she was able to speak plainly with him.
A carriage was pulling through the main portcullis as Mary entered the courtyard. She didn't know what noble or member of court would be within, but she didn't feel like socializing with anyone. She tried to hide behind a pillar until the occupant was safely inside and out of her sight. However, when it finally opened to reveal Louis' face, he looked shocked but pleased that Mary was standing before him. She had no conscious memory of leaving her hiding place to make her presence known, but as he was the one she really wished to speak to, she wasn't surprised that it had happened.
"To what do I owe the pleasure of your company at this hour?" This was one of the reasons she felt connected to him. He was ever the gentleman but always freely showed his affection to her. She felt safe with him as she didn't feel with Francis anymore.
She gestured that he join her in a more secluded area of the garden. She didn't want to be overheard or for anyone to see the two of them and start any gossip. "Louis, I have a matter about which I must speak with you, but it must be kept private from all." Mary hid behind the comfort of a large shrubbery and hoped that any passerby would be unable to see her hidden within and would not know who Louis was speaking with, "I was speaking with Francis just now." Louis leaned back, sure that nothing good would come from the rest of this conversation. His opinion of her husband was well-known by all parties involved. "Now don't react like that. He's," Mary paused, unsure how to continue, "he's a much better man than you give him credit for. He's given me his blessing if I want to pursue a relationship with you. For now. I was shocked and given the manner of our conversation, I was angry. I left the room before hearing any details of his offer. But I wanted to speak with you before I return and hash out what exactly he's willing to do." Mary found that she was wringing her hands in her nervousness and quickly worked to still them.
Louis' jaw had dropped. He didn't speak for a few moments. Finally, he stood up, closed his mouth, and tried to form a coherent thought. "I thought that you had made your feeling quite plain. I admitted mine to you and you have rebuked and rebuffed my advances at each turn. Mary, are you saying that you share my feelings?"
Fighting back a feeling of frustration, Mary clasped her hands firmly in front of her to keep them from shaking. No matter her feelings for or about Francis, she had been working so hard for so many weeks to repair their relationship and to acknowledge her feelings for another felt wrong, even if she had been given permission to do so. "I do, Louis. You know that I do. I know you've seen it from me in my actions as well as in my interactions with you. I know I've been nothing but unfair to you, but until this evening, I was certain that any involvement on our part would lead to your execution and complications for France and Scotland. Louis, I was trying to protect you while doing what was right for my people, no matter where they are. But Francis has granted me permission and protection to be with you. I would like to explore the possibility and see where we could go if you are agreeable to it."
"And here I thought the man far too brutish to ever allow you to live your life. Mary, whatever his deal is, you have to accept." He grasped her hands tightly, almost a manic look in his eyes, "Now that I know of your feelings for me, I need to be with you." He grasped at her forearms and tried to pull her closer. "Mary, don't do this to me. I can't be away from you. I've been dreaming of nothing but this for days and now that I know it can be, you must let me in."
Pushing back and away from Louis, Mary collected her thoughts in the face of Louis' declaration. "You would really be able to accept this? We would never really be together, Louis. We would be constantly under the scrutiny of Francis and always just a moment away from him rescinding this offer. Can you live like that? Can I ask you to live like that?"
Leaning down to rest his forehead against hers, Louis smiled, "Mary, for you, I can do anything. You can ask anything of me and I will agree without a moment's hesitation. I am yours."
Mary smiled back up at him, "then I must go have a conversation with my husband."
