A/N: Two chapters in one day is because I felt so bad for not updating in ages. Anyway I hope you enjoy this chapter as there are quite a few revelations in it!
I felt slightly light headed at what I had just heard, causing me to lean forward and rest my head on the door; big mistake. The living room door creaked loudly and I had to hold my breath in order to remain undetected. Luckily Rose did not take much notice of the noise which had sounded so loud in the silence, and turned her attention back to the man she had called the Doctor; my father.
If anyone had asked me that morning what I thought of my family I would have replied with the conventional 'They're normal, within reason. Two parents and one sister.' It had been all so simple. Now, it was getting harder to understand what the hell was going on. Okay, I got it that Rose was my mother and that there must be a reason that she had never told me before, but now, there is some strange guy in my living room, hugging my mother and telling her that my name is beautiful, just like her.
Aww, he thinks my name is beautiful. Wait, this man, this Doctor, is my Dad. My real Dad, and he wants to know what I'm like, he is actually interested in me. So why did he leave us then; or did he. He appears over the moon to see Rose and he does not seem like he wanted to leave her given their reunion. Also, what did he mean by being able to feel me and the tapping his temple. Oh God, I hope he's not some sort of creepy stalker who has been tracking me over facebook.
"Doctor, you have been gone for seventeen years" he gasped, I gasped. They had been separated for seventeen years; that makes my whole facebook theory less believable.
"It's only been seven to me" now Rose was the one gasping, which was good as it masked my uber gasp from behind the door. How on earth could it have only been seven years for him? Was he joking? It did not look like it; what was this man, some sort of time traveller?
There was a twinge behind my eyes, like a memory which you can't quite see until someone reminds you what happened. I brushed the feeling off, as Rose had begun to speak again.
"Listen Doctor, I might have been brilliant while I was with you, but in the past seventeen years I have acted terribly." she paused, he remained silent. "I will completely understand if you never want to see me again after I explain everything that has gone on" Rose had begun to cry. All I wanted to do at that moment was to run up to her and give her a cuddle, tell her everything was okay, I just wanted to make her feel better; the Doctor beat me to it.
"Hey, hey. Stop that crying, baby. I've just got you back Rose and I promise you that I will never, ever let you go again." she rested her head on his chest as he began to rock her back and forth stroking her hair. "I love you Rose, and nothing you say is ever going to change that" Rose did not appear to look convinced as she pulled away from him. I stayed silent sitting behind the door, anticipating what Rose was going to say next. I had no idea what it was that she wanted to tell this man, but these two people were my parents, and I had already decided that I needed to hear whatever she had to say.
Rose sat up straight on the sofa next to the Doctor. She had turned away from him at first, but now, she was looking directly into his eyes.
"When I saw you on the beach, I was three months gone. No one knew, not even Mum, I couldn't stand it hear her go on about shagging an alien and not being careful or some utter shit like that" Rose began to play with the hem of her t-shirt nervously while the Doctor remained silent.
"Even after Norway I never actually told anyone; I was kind of ignoring it, hoping it would just go away. I was a wreck. I had lost you and all I wanted to do was curl up in bed one night and never have to get up again, but I knew I couldn't because there was a baby, our baby, growing inside of me" I was shocked I had no idea that a break up could have had this effect on someone, especially Rose, the strongest person I had ever known.
"It was Mum who noticed first, at five months. I was managing to drag myself out of bed once or twice a day to get something to eat, and at the time I wasn't overly concerned about what I was wearing. I didn't think and she sort of just shouted at me and took me by surprise; turns out I was wearing a very tight vest top which seemed to showcase my bump" the Doctor gave a small laugh, his arm still around Rose's waist.
"I hated her for it, for telling me it was real, and that soon I would have to look after a baby, your baby. I couldn't deal with it so I got in the car and I drove, as far as I could get with the petrol in the tank, just wanting to make it all go away. I did something terrible" Rose said looking him in the eye, a single tear escaping from her eyes.
"I convinced myself that I couldn't do it, that I would let you down and that I would just end up giving our baby a terrible life because I would be terrible mother"
"No, Rose" the Doctor interrupted in an attempt to soothe her.
"So I got out of the car, I had no idea where I was but there was a lake just off the road. I walked there and I got to the jetty, and I jumped, just like that off the edge and into the water" I could not believe what she had just said; my own mother had tried to kill herself, and me. Tears were sliding down my cheeks and I was desperately trying to suppress sobs in order to remain undetected. I was unsure whether I was angry at Rose or whether I was just confused at her actions. I felt numb.
"Rose, why?" was the Doctor's response.
"I couldn't deal with not having you anymore, and depression just sort of took over and then Mum made the baby seem so real and it all got too much" Rose was near to hysterical as the Doctor rocked her back and forth like a baby herself. He did not appear angry at her, his expression was one of great sympathy; my expression changed to mirror his as I saw that this tragic event was not Rose's fault.
Rose had calmed down considerably over the next few minutes and she finally appeared to be composed enough, to continue with her story. However, she first asked the Doctor a question which was apparently plaguing her mind.
"Aren't you angry with me?" she asked.
"Rose, I told you before, I will love you no matter what. This wasn't your fault, if anything it was mine"
"Don't say that!" she replied immediately "it was never your fault"
"Rose, what happened?" the Doctor prompted, now stroking her long blonde hair while cuddling her into his side.
"As I said, the lake was next to the road and someone had seem me jump in. They pulled me out and next thing I knew I was lying in a hospital bed in the Torchwood being told that my baby was fine and I was very lucky. Mum said that the bloke who pulled me out worked at Torchwood and recognised me, and rang them first"
"Good job too, I'm not sure what a hospital would have done with you pregnant with my child"
The two shared a short laugh, like it was an inside joke or something. Anyway since when did Torchwood have a hospital, I thought it was just part of the police. I didn't really get the joke about the hospital, but I wasn't sure if I wanted to know.
"Mum had a go at me saying how irresponsible I had been, it wasn't like I hadn't realised or anything. She told me I needed to talk to her, tell her what was wrong, so I did. I told her, I thought that I couldn't look after the baby and she agreed. She said that when the baby was born that she and Dad would look after it as if it was their own, and in no time it was arranged. I stayed in torchwood from then on so no one could see the bump, as did Mum because of her lack of bump; then she was born" he was smiling, stroking her cheek. Rose was smiling too and I felt warm inside that it was the memory of me which was making her feel like that.
"You should have seen her Doctor, so beautiful, so tiny. I decided there and then that I was going to look after her; I knew that I was going to be Hollie's Mum. Then she was taken away from me and given to my Mum, and it was like part of my heart had been ripped out and set on fire."
"Oh, Rose"
"They let me pick her name: Hollie Louisa Tyler. That was all though, before they took her home and claimed her as their own. So when I was recovered, I left. I just got up and left for the airport. I had plenty money, and apparently nothing to keep me there so I decided to go travelling. Eight months I went for, and I tried to move on but I just couldn't so I came home to see my baby, my daughter. I walked through the door and Mum gave me a huge hug and told me never to go away again, then Dad passed me Hollie. Eight months old, giggling and not at all shy, and I held her in my arms and kissed her blonde hair"
The Doctor pulled Rose closer and smiled as she did; it was strange it was like I could almost remember that day all those years ago. Then her expression changed from smiling happily to frowning, the Doctor rubbed her arm in soothing.
"She was so gorgeous, and perfect, then Mum said 'Hollie, this is your sister, Rose' and it broke my heart all over again. I knew then that's all I would be, her sister, but I didn't want that. So I talked to Mum and Dad and we all agreed that I would tell her on her sixteenth birthday. Except I didn't"
"Why not?" the Doctor asked, as I mouthed those exact words.
"All the fears of being a bad mother came back and it scared me, so I just kept my mouth shut"
"So she still doesn't know that you're her mother?"
"Oh, she knows now" Rose chuckled "I told her about" she glanced at her watch "Two hours ago"
The Doctor's mouth dropped open and I had to stop myself from giggling at his comical face. It seemed Rose had the same problem as a snigger escaped her lips.
"Yeah, I know, you always did appear at the most inappropriate times" he smiled at this.
"Does she know about me?"
"No, I didn't get the chance to tell her. She has no idea who her father is" I smiled knowingly at Rose's remark, she should never underestimate me.
"Yeah best not tell her right away" the Doctor laughed as Rose took over.
"Can you imagine? 'Hollie, this is your Dad, his name is the Doctor, he's 900 years old, and he's an alien with two hearts'"
"What!" I shouted.
I think they might have heard me.
A/N: so what did you think, what will happen next? It could be anything actually as I haven't writhe next chapter yet.
Review please
xxx
