In the era of the Hero of Time, currently under the reign of Ganondorf – the exact length of which is unclear due to conflicting historical accounts which simultaneously state his rule as either lasting seven years, or never quite managing to get started due to preemptive action by the young Princess and her friend from the forest. Location – Hyrule Field, the battle against Ganondorf for the future of Hyrule:


He'd finally done it.

After seven years of searching, planning, and preparing, he'd finally succeeded.

He had the Hero at his mercy.

Ganon gazed impassively down at the little green man desperately reaching for his little toothpick sword and smirked ever so slightly. Despite the little voice of common sense telling him otherwise, he decided that a little bragging and taunting couldn't possibly do that much damage.

"How does it feel to lose everything?" he rumbled, though the words didn't come as easily as he wanted. That was one of the downsides to his current, boar-like form; although his strength and size was much increased, the finer details like speech and some aspects of rational thought were given in exchange.

The Hero, as was his habit, didn't respond, continuing to stretch for the weapon out of his reach. Ganon sighed and placed one large foot on top of the Hero's torso, abruptly halting any progress he might have been making.

"I admit, you've done a fine job of eluding me these past seven years," Ganon continued, examining one of his blades. "I was actually beginning to become annoyed. But, like the child you are, you came to me. Isn't that ironic?"

The Hero glared at him and began attempting to wriggle out from under his foot, but otherwise made no response.

"I think I will kill you slowly and make the little Princess watch," Ganon mused. "Or maybe, I'll kill the little Princess slowly, and make you watch. Which would you prefer?"

He received a Death Glare in answer, and Ganon had to admit that it was a fairly potent Glare, as far as mere mortals went. Luckily, he was not a mere mortal and thus the Glare had no effect on him.

"You do have some spirit left in you after all, don't you now?" Ganon observed. "Pity, I thought I'd crushed all that by now. No matter, I'll get to it in just a minute. I'll have to ask you to be patient in the meantime.

Under his foot, the Hero had started ignoring him and was stretching himself towards his weapon again. Ganon rolled his eyes and glanced up towards the Princess, who had her hand over her mouth in horror.

"Perhaps I'll just kill you both quickly instead, to save myself the trouble," Ganon decided. "No muss, no fuss, just a quick little slit-!"

He interrupted himself with an earsplitting bellow, because the Hero had somehow gotten ahold of his sword and had just stabbed Ganon in the foot. This, of course, threw Ganon off his guard, and the Hero was able to slip out from underneath and set about finishing the job he'd set out to do seven years ago.


"Really?" Link said incredulously, turning the page of the past Princess's old but well-preserved diary. "He had that kind of advantage and he just talked? No wonder he got himself beat..."


Rule Number Six: I will not gloat over my enemies' predicament before killing them.