Chapter 7: It just feels right

"Hey Bella," Jacob and I were supposed to meet up this afternoon and he had called me to ask what we were going to do.

"Oh um… sorry Jake I can't do anything this afternoon, it's Charlie, he's really sick."

I felt so guilty lying to him but it was the only way I could think of so I could go and see Edward.

"Oh, that's too bad, but can't you just come for a little while, he's a big boy I'm sure he'll be fine."

"Look Jake, I wish I could, really I do but I can't, I mean you know what a klutz Charlie is, and he is terrible at cooking, I promise we will do something tomorrow."

"Well, I'll pop round yours later then."

"NO!" I virtually screamed it at him down the phone

"What?"

"What I mean is, I don't want you catching anything, for all we know it could be a highly contagious life threatening disease."

"Well then shouldn't you not be near Charlie?"

"Oh right. No don't worry about me I'll be fine, I never get ill."

"Bella, are you ok. You sound really jumpy and nervous?"

"No. I'm fine, look Jake I have to go now, I'll call you later ok. I love you."

"I love you too".

God. It felt horrible lying to him, I hate lying to anyone. But I had to lie. It was the only way I could go round and kiss Edward.

Oh god! Why was I doing this? Yesterday morning I was in a perfectly happy relationship with the guy I am madly in love with, but now I was on my way round to some other guy's house to find out if I have feelings for him.

I left the house to go and see Edward. I felt awful for lying to Jake but what else could I do. As I got closer and closer to Edwards I felt more and more guilty, and more and more stupid.

DING DONG! As I rang the door bell my hands were shaking and my heart was pounding, as it does regularly.

"I knew you would come back for me Bella."

There was Edward standing at the door with his smug attitude and his smug voice. Did I really have feelings for this guy?

"Are you alone?"

"Yeah why?"

"Look, don't say anything I just have to figure something out so don't move."

Then I kissed him and my heart stopped pounding and my hands raised up to head and ruffled through his smooth silky hair while I slowly felt his soft gentle hands lower to my waist. And from this kiss there was one thing I was certain of.

"Oh crap," I slowly mumbled as I pulled away.

"Well. What was that for?"

"Sorry, I just had to see something."

Then he gradually moved closer to me, as he always does. Maybe that's his way of seducing girls? He then whispered right in front of me. "I hope you found what you were looking for," his voice sounded so soft and his smile was perfection. Right before I spoke I gulped.

"Yeh…um… I did. Ok well I best be off bye."

I spoke so fast even I couldn't understand. I could tell he was holding my hand because I could feel his soft skin against mine.

"Bella, don't go."

"I have too, I shouldn't even be here."

"Then how come you are?"

"Well… jus…" before I could even get a sentence out he kissed me again and I didn't back away because even I could feel the passion and it just felt so right. I knew that I had feelings for Edward. I mean I didn't want to feel them, I just did. I still love Jacob, of course I do, but I have feelings for Edward and I didn't feel there was anyway of over coming them except to stay away from him. But I didn't want to stay away from him, I wanted to see him again and I would see him again. Jacob can't stop me.

I pulled away.

"Bye Edward," I smiled at him

"Bye Bella," he smiled back. Even though me kissing Edward, me being friends with Edward and having feelings for him was wrong, it just felt right, like it was meant to happen.

As I was on my way home, I had the biggest smile on my face, and for once in my life I felt genuinely happy. That was until I walked up to my house and standing there on my doorstep was Jacob. Oh crap how was I going to cover this one up? I told him I was at home with Charlie because he was ill, but he had obviously rang the doorbell, realized there was no one in, probably figured out I was lying to him, if he hasn't he is dumber than I thought.

"Hey Bella, where have you been?" he couldn't have spoken in a more sarcastic tone.

"No need to talk to me like that?"

"Like what?"

"All sarcastic and rude," while I was saying this I was thinking of a good cover story.

"Sorry, but are you going to answer my question or not?"

"Is that a rhetorical question or do I actually have a choice."

"Bella!"

"Ok fine, I was…um… out."

"Out where?"

"At my grandmas" quick thinking Bella. "Dropping off Charlie, so I could spend the afternoon with my boyfriend, who I love very much," flattery always helped in these situations, well I think it did.

"Oh right ok." Wow he is gul…a…ble. Or maybe I am just a great actress.

"So what do you want to do then?" I could here a voice but didn't really listen. All I could think about was my kiss with Edward.

"Bella. Hello, earth calling Bella."

"Oh right, sorry, where were we?"

"Are you sure you're ok. You have been acting really weird lately."

"Well actually, I think I may have caught Charlie's bug. I feel kind of dizzy and light headed. Do you mind if we don't hang out today, it's probably best if I rest for a bit."

What was wrong with me? I had this perfectly gorgeous guy in front of me who loved me very much and who I loved to, but all I wanted to do was call Edward, hear his soft velvet voice, kiss those beautiful perfect lips.

"Well, if you're sure?"

"Yeah. Look I'll call you later."

"Okay, I love you."

"Love you too".

Do I? Of course I do. I mean these feelings for Edward they will go away. It's just a crush. A stupid school girl crush. Isn't it? No, I don't want these feelings to go away. I wanted them to stay. Maybe I don't love Jacob anymore? Oh I don't know. My head is all over the place.

But there is one thing I do know, I am falling for Edward Cullen!