Beni is currently still very depressed about her experience. She felt she didn't do anything wrong but at the same time she feels like she did the worst think a person could do. She was deeply regretting her actions before and even during the time she knew the boys. Now she knows she is a different person but she does not know if they others trust her, believe her or even if they would forgive her. She couldn't help but think they would never forgive her.
Guren was watching her. He could see she was bothered and really needed some cheering up, but he was not sure how. He knew she was feeling regret. He also knew she has changed. She even proved that in her challenge but it seemed she did not believe it herself. Finally he decided to just go up and try to help her.
"Beni? Are you ok?" He said calmly. He was not expecting an answer and that is exactly what he got from her. She did look up at him but she said nothing to him. In fact she looked worse when she saw him and turned around. Guren didn't want to leave her, so he just sat down next to her and hoped she would eventually talk to him.
Many minutes have passed and Beni still has not said a word. He really could tell how much she was hurting but he still was not sure what to say. But he couldn't leave he like this. "Beni. I know you are hurting but I just want to tell you it will all be OK."
Beni looked at him and she appeared to be surprised. However her surprised only lasted for a second. She then seemed to get angry. "What would you know?!" She said turning her head in anger.
"I guess not much but I want to help. But I can't do that if you don't talk to me." Guren said. Beni however just kept her head turned and she appeared to not even what to look at him. "Beni, we are friends now."
That was when she turned around. "We are?" She said with uncertainty in her voice.
"Yes. We are." Guren said smiling at her.
She blushed a little and said, "I guess we are." She couldn't help but smile. "However…" she lost the smile. "…I am not so sure everyone else thinks so."
Guren looked at her with confusion. "I think they do."
"I am not so sure." Beni said not really convinced.
"Well…" he had to pause to think of his words. "…have you talked to them?"
"No." Beni said bluntly.
"Well, how do you know if…" he was cut off.
"Because I know they would not want to talk to me!" She said nearly yelled.
Guren was stunned by the sudden statement and couldn't say anything else. Beni looked like she was able to cry again. "I know they don't like me. I know I did a lot of bad things to all of you. And I know I do not deserve to be forgiven." She said with watery eyes.
"Beni?" Guren said feeling sympathy towards her. "I forgive you."
"That's just because you are so stupidly nice to me." Beni said in protest.
"No. It is because you are sincerely sorry." Guren said. "At first, I will admit, I did not think I would ever forgive you for all that you did…" he saw the sadness in her eyes. "…but that has changed now." He could tell Beni was paying full attention now. "Like you said you changed and I can see that. You are kinder and I can tell you really do regret what you did. People learn from their mistakes and you defiantly did, so I believe you should be forgiven."
"But the others…" Beni said now thinking of them.
"I am sure they will too. After all, they all saw what you said. I bet they all can see how much you changed and how sorry you are. All you have to do is tell them."
"But what do I say?" Beni said in confusion.
"That is simple. Just say you're sorry." Guren said bluntly.
"Will they really forgive me with just that?" Beni said doubting that is it that simple.
"I don't know. You will have to find that out for yourself." Guren said honestly.
Beni was not happy about that but she knew he was right. Immediately after Guren decided to get up and leave her alone so she could think it over. He couldn't be the one to apologize and she had to decide if she was even going to apologize by herself. Beni went into deep thought about. However this was not the only thing on her mind. She also was thinking about Ceylan. She felt like she could help him but she was not so sure he would accept it, so she went back to her own problem. However that was easier said than done since she kept looking his way and really wanting to help.
"What should I do?' She asked herself.
Author's Note: OK this was a short chapter but Beni was surprisingly easy to write for. I hope you like it. Next chapter will be the last and I am hoping I will be able to post it Tomorrow. Last character is Ceylan.
