I'm sorry, I've probably lost all my readers by now haha. But, I had a virus, so we had to send it in and there were so many passwords on the computer that the computer technicians couldn't even get in the system. And it took my dad forever to think of the password.. "Celtics" -_-
Anyway, this was requested and I thought it was a good idea, so im sorry for the wait.
Disclaimer: Sadly, I do not own Twilight or Jasper Whitlock.
...or Crystal Castles!
Jasper POV
Don't get me wrong, I love my job, but I was starting to feel like this whole situation with Bella was turning out to be a complete waste. It's been an entire six months, and I was getting nowhere. But then again I guess that's how these things work sometimes. If she doesn't want to tell me she doesn't have to, but what would be the point of sitting in silence for an hour almost everyday? All I was getting was that she's been seeing the same thing in her mind happened, as if it's happened before. Which could mean one of two things - she's regaining her memory slowly, or these events that she's seeing have happened previously, as if they argue constantly. That's the farthest I've gotten in the past six months. It's like she doesn't want to be helped. There are other people that could use my help - that would be willing to use my help. I can make this work, I can. I just have to be patient.
Today she decided memory wasn't important, and that she didn't want to remember. Which frustrated me a little, if she doesn't want to remember than why is she here? I want her to understand, but she can be so stubborn. "It is important though, don't you see? Don't you want to know how you used to be?"
"I - er - no?"
I felt a lot of emotions at once. Annoyed, surprised, flabbergasted if you will. I really need to work on my patience. "Really? Hm."
She didn't speak, so I stared off. All I could think about was the fact that she didn't want this – or so it seemed. I started to think about ways I could get her to open up, questions I could ask, something to make her snap; but nothing was coming to mind. So I started to think of irrelevant things, something I'm almost positive she was doing as well. I wondered what my mom was doing right now, what my sister Rosalie was up to, and what some of my friends were doing while I was sitting around thinking. I glanced at Bella, and had to restrain from laughing. She was staring at the couch she was sitting on as if it was the most disgusting thing she'd ever seen. I don't exactly blame her, I mean, and orange couch doesn't really go with the room. I'd much prefer a light brown but it doesn't matter much. I continued to stare off until Bella finally decided to speak.
"Hey, Jasper?"
"Yes?"
"I was uh, thinking, and.."
She seemed… hesitant. I pushed her on before she decided to go with her classic "nevermind, it doesn't matter" line.
"And…"
"And well, I thought of another thing I don't think about James." I stared at her for a minute, wondering if that was really what she wanted to ask. But went along with it regardless.
"Another thing to add to your list, huh? I really do think you should just divorce the guy. Get it over with."
"Funny."
I gave her an apologetic smile. "Well, no, I'm being serious! But, what is it you don't like?"
"It's like I'm isolated, you know? I don't talk to anyone except James, and I don't even like to talk to him!"
I couldn't help but laugh. I mean think about it, she's married to a man she doesn't like to speak to, she doesn't know why she doesn't like to speak to him and she doesn't want to remember why… how odd.
She raised an eyebrow at me. "What's so funny?"
"Nothing, nothing. Continue."
"No, tell me why you laughed. I want to know what was so humorous!"
I could tell she wasn't angry, just joking around. That's how it always was, we joke around but we never really get to the point, never figure out what the problem is. It's either joke around or change the subject. I need to know what's going on with her life, but for now I guess ill just have to be patient.
"Well, because. Would you listen to yourself?"
She glared at me. "What do you mean?"
"'I don't talk to anyone but James, and I don't even like to talk to him!' Do you really not realize how funny that sounds?!"
She must've realized I was right because she began to laugh with me. "I guess so. But still. It's not like I have anyone else to talk to, I'm cooped up in the house all the time like some prisoner."
I smiled at her. "You have me to talk to, that's what I'm here for."
"Well, I know. But, that's not what I meant, and besides. Three hours a week. How nice."
Now I was confused. I stared at her with a look I'm sure screamed "what?!"
"Well what did you mean, then?"
"I meant like, a friend. You know? I don't have any friends to talk to."
I wondered if she was messing around again, so I acted like I was offended. "Do you not consider me your friend? I'm hurt!"
She giggled. "Do you consider me yours?"
I thought about it for a minute before answering. "Well of course! I'm not this carefree with my other patients."
She grinned. "Oh, okay."
"What's that mean?" She blushed and I couldn't help but grin. She could be so cute sometimes.
"It doesn't mean anything. Just means 'okay'."
I shook my head. She sure can switch up quickly. "Well, before we waste anymore time. Let's start being serious-" I noticed her face fell but continued anyway.
"So, Bella. I was thinking, and I think it might be a good idea if I came by your house tomorrow."
Her eyes practically flew out of her head. I felt like I was watching a cartoon.
"Well, I mean it might sound weird and everything. It sounds weird to me too, but I just feel like were not getting anywhere here. You know, by just sitting here. I can't seem to break through that thick skull of yours and I think it'd be a good idea if I came by and saw what your home life was like. I know this doesn't usually happen, but I feel like it would help. So, how about it?"
She continued to stare off into space as if she didn't hear a word I said. "Bella? Bella? Did you even listen to me? Beeellllaaaaa…"
Finally she snapped out of it. "Oh, sorry. What?"
I was so annoyed. I stared at her for a minute, wondering if she was seriously listening to me now.
"Well, uh. I was saying that I think it'd be a good idea if I came by your house tomorrow."
"Why?"
I sighed. "Just because I think that if I saw what your life is like then I could understand what you mean by... 'Rough', although I'm sure it'd be a little less 'rough', considering I'm there. Then I could ask your husband about how you acted before the accident. Id have something more to work with."
She was quiet for a minute and I just waited. "Oh.. uh. I guess. Yeah, sure, alright."
I smiled at her, happy that she was finally cooperating. "Okay, then! I'll come around three?"
"James wont be home." She mumbled simply.
"Oh, okay. What time is good then?"
"Hm." She sat their thinking and I chose not to interrupt her. I mean this is kind of last minute.
Suddenly she just burst out and said "Around seven. Actually. Seven. On the dot. Ill have dinner ready and everything."
"Alright, then. I think that's about all the time we have for today, perfect timing, huh?"
"Yeah." She seemed… mad?
I stood up the same moment she did, this was becoming like a routine. "Or not…" I thought as I saw her go for a hug as I went for a handshake. How awkward. She turned a blistering shade of red before shaking my hand and mumbling a goodbye and turning around. I felt a little bad, I didn't know she would want to hug me. "Eh, Why not?" I thought."Uh, Bella?"
She hesitantly turned around before quietly saying "Yeah?"
I grinned widely and extended my arms, knowing she'd get the hint, and if she didn't than not even going to her house would solve this problem.
"See you tomorrow" I said as I let go of her.
"Right. See you, then." She smiled and stumbled out of the room, probably going to wait for her ride home unless her husband was already here.
Her husband… I almost forgot about that for a minute.
I sighed loudly before making sure everything looked nice and neat. Then I sat down and started to think about what it would be like at Bella's house. Is it really, really clean? I don't think he husband would clean… he seems like the type of guy that would want his wife to clean. But Bella seems more like the messy type. I laughed at myself; I was acting like I actually know her. Does she cook? Well, obviously. She said she would have dinner ready. I was pretty anxious, but an excited anxious. I don't know why. Maybe it's because I'll finally understand her. Or maybe it's because I'll be with her, outside of this room. I rolled my eyes and sighed. "What are you talking about? She's married." I mentally scolded myself. I sat back in my chair and started to think about what she would cook. Is she on a diet? Is she a vegetarian? I started to realize that I really knew nothing about her. I'm not sure why, but it bothered me immensely. There was a small knock on the door. I shook my head and got up, opening the door for my next patient.
For some reason I can't really space out my writing.. or at least it doesn't look spaced out on my computer soo sorry if it's hard to read.
Love ya! n__n
