This chapter is going to jump a bit. I guess it's kinda like a 5 and 1 format.

Chapter 7

Song: I hate that I love you by Rihanna and Chris Brown

Prompt from: bumblewolf


John sat at his computer, typing away about the case he and Sherlock had just finished while said detective stood in the kitchen, watching John out of the corner of his eye. It had been about a week since Sherlock discovered his new feelings for John, but he still hadn't told the doctor for fear that John would reject him, be disgusted by him for loving him, when John, as he had made it painfully clear, was not gay.

So Sherlock kept it to himself. He never told John, and never let his affections make themselves known, unless it was a time like this, where John wasn't paying attention to him. "I hate how much I love you, John," he said quietly enough so that the doctor wouldn't hear, and continued to sip at his tea. "But I just can't let it go."

"What was that Sherlock?"

"I didn't say anything," he said. He had tried to delete these new feelings several times, but it never worked. He was forever stuck with the knowledge that his love will never love him back.


John and Sherlock ducked into an alleyway to escape the gunshots that fired after them. They ran down far and pressed themselves against a wall, John holding onto Sherlock's sleeve, something he hadn't noticed until now. He let go of it and looked to Sherlock, then both started to laugh at the narrow escape. Something else they hadn't noticed until now, was how close they were. John looked up at his best friend, and the only thing Sherlock wanted to do was kiss the man. He could have sworn he saw something there in those wonderful blue eyes, but he ignored the thought, it was just his mind playing cruel jokes on him. John was straight, and the only love the doctor would ever feel for him was strictly platonic.

Sherlock stepped back a bit, cleared his throat a bit, and said "We should probably, uh, get back to Lestrade." His mind was doing it again, he thought he saw disappointment in his friends eyes. If only to prove himself of his theory, he stepped back to John, and they were now close once again. They looked each other in the eyes, and Sherlock slowly leaned down, surprised and relieved when the doctor didn't pull away, but ever so slightly, tilt his head up to the detective's. Sherlock slowly leaned in, giving the doctor the chance to change his mind, but he didn't move. Their lips connected in a sweet though tentative kiss. It wasn't quick, but it wasn't long either, it was the perfect length for a first kiss. When their lips broke apart, they lingered so close that the two men could feel each others hot breath on their skin. They went in for another kiss, this one deeper, and Sherlock placed his hands on John's face and John placed his hands on Sherlock's waist. He licked at Sherlock's bottom lip and Sherlock opened his mouth. This inside of Sherlock's mouth was a wonderful new experience, almost as good as the feeling of having Sherlock's tongue in his own mouth. Their lips and tongues danced as they finally set there nerves at ease. They would have kissed like that for hours, but only minutes later did they have to break apart for air. They looked at each other with lust filled eyes, panting a bit as they tried to catch their breath.

"I thought that it was just in my head," Sherlock said, his voice a bit deeper than usual.

John chuckled, then kissed him again. "Nope."

"Would now be a good time to tell you that I love you?"

"Perfect time, actually, because I love you too."

They shared another kiss before catching a cab to the yard.


Sherlock stood on the roof of St. Bart's, his phone to his ear as he spoke to John, tears rushing down his face.

"Sherlock, please, come down."

"I'm sorry, John. I'm so sorry."

"Sherlock, please, I love you," John choked out. It only made Sherlock dispose more tears.

"I know. I know and I love you too."

"Then come down, Sherlock. Please, don't leave me!"

Sherlock choked back a sob and waited a few seconds until he could trust his voice. "Goodbye, John."

"No, don't."

Sherlock tossed his phone to the side. I'll be back John, I promise I will come back for you he thought to himself. He spread his arms out like wings and fell over.

"Sherlock!"


Two years later, John kneeled in front of the gravestone that belonged to the world's only consulting detective. He placed his fingertips on the shiny black marble and brushed it lightly, as if he were touching Sherlock. A few tears escaped his eyes as he began to speak.

"Hi, love. It's me again." He sniffled a little before continuing. "I uh, I wanted to say that this will be the last time I come to see you. Well come here to see you. I can't take this much longer, I need you." He bit his lip before continuing. "I hate how much I love you. I hate I really hate how much I need you, Sherlock, because now, I'm left alone with all this love that I can never give to you, so it just sits, rotting in my heart, dissolving it and there's nothing I can do about it. Nothing except join you, so, that's what I'm going to do. You will never guess how much I love you, or how happy I am that you loved my back, and soon, we'll be together again. Goodbye, Love. I'll see you soon." He got up and began to walk to over to get a cab, but was stopped by a deep baritone voice.

"You don't need to kill yourself for us to be together."

John turned slowly to see Sherlock standing there. The tears that had stopped had now returned as he looked towards the tall figure of his best friend and lover.

"Sh-Sherlock?"

"Yes, John. It's me."

John ran up to him and threw his arms around Sherlock. He hugged him tightly as Sherlock returned the hug. "Why?" he asked, his voice shaky as he took in the feel and scent of the man he loved.

"I'm so sorry, John, but it was to save you. You and Mrs. Hudson and Lestrade.

"What do you mean?"

"Moriarty had snipers set on all three of you. He would have killed you if they didn't see me jump." He put a hand on the back of John's head, loving the feel of his soft blonde hair. Neither of them spoke for a while, they just enjoyed the silence for a few minutes as they once again felt each other in their arms. Sherlock pressed a kiss to the top of John's head before nuzzling his face there. It was a few minutes before John broke the silence.

"I'm going to punch you later."

"I won't stop you."

"But, for now, I just want to enjoy having you back. I love you so much, you bloody bastard."

Sherlock chuckled a little. "I love you too."


Hope you liked it!