Ichigo and Grimmjow didn't get a chance to talk about their equally awkward night. Neither knew the other had had a similar issue. The guards came and took Ichigo away again. Grimmjow had to be restrained, he couldn't help himself. Later, the King came, while Grimmjow was nursing a bleeding nose, Halibel holding a cloth against it.

"You know there's no point to fighting."

"I can't help it." Grimmjow muttered to his captor. "What you do to him..." he let hang. There weren't enough words in his or anyone's vocabulary to describe his hatred for this man.

"Grimmjow, what do you want?"

"What?"

"When Ichigo becomes mine, what do you want? Do you want to remain with him or do you want me to let you go?"

Halibel dropped the cloth. They both stared at the King.

"What do you mean?"

"It's a simple question."

"Since when was freedom an option?"

"Since now."

He clenched his jaw and looked to Halibel. "What if I stayed and she was freed."

"Grimmjow! How could you even consider that?" She scolded.

"That is a very interesting thought. I wonder if it would work?" Grimmjow was getting very tired of Bach's comments that made no sense.

"The Hell do you mean?"

"You two are very bonded." Bach said evenly. "I wonder what would happen if you chose to leave one another."

Grimmjow was reminded of his words to Halibel just last night. The King had a point. He couldn't really entertain the thought of leaving Halibel. She didn't look offended by his proposition, but he suddenly felt guilty for suggesting it.

"You're right. Halibel and I are a team." He turned back to the King. "It's why you could never break us."

"So then you would go with her, or make her stay a prisoner."

"She's her own person, she can decide for herself. But none of this matters because Ichigo's not going to break either."

"Fine." the King rose from his chair. "Oh, I brought you this." He pulled a board from his robes, a bag with it. Grimmjow recognized the checkered board as a game Aizen had taught them in order to learn strategy. Chess. "To pass the time."

He didn't say thank you, but he couldn't deny they desperately needed a new form of entertainment. He'd finished the Hobbit the week earlier.

When the King made his exit, they both left the board untouched long enough to consider it defiance before opening the bag and setting up the pieces.

Halibel won, Grimmjow didn't really expect any other outcome. They played twenty nine games before Ichigo came back. The game was as good as anything to pass the time each day, to distract Grimmjow in particular from Ichigo's prolonged absence.

It had been five days. Ichigo didn't even seem to have the energy to cry this time. He was just handed off to Grimmjow who took him to the couch and sat with him. Halibel came to their side and looked him over. Ichigo never spoke.

"He's got nothing left." she whispered to Grimmjow. "Just pain."

"Don't say that." he hissed back. "He'll be okay."

But it was a long time before Ichigo made any sign of being aware of them. He took a grip on Grimmjow's shirt and shifted his head but still didn't speak.

"It's the drugs." He whispered at some point. Grimmjow almost felt relieved. If he was so out of it from drugs, then it would pass.

"Do you want to lay down?"

He shook his head. "Can we stay like this?"

"Yeah." The three sat in silent fellowship. Even when Ichigo fell asleep Grimmjow kept hold of him, tight against his chest.


Grimmjow woke when Ichigo went rigid in his arms followed by a hot spew that ran down his chest.

"Shit." he heard the teen muttered before he himself put together what had happened. Ichigo had puked on him and was currently trying to roll off of him to continue.

"Crap." Grimmjow hauled him up and to the bathroom. He got him propped against the toilet and let him continue while he pulled off his shirt before the vomit could soak through to his skin. It was on his pants too. He discarded these as well and hurried to wash the couch down before stains soaked in. He doubted the quincy guards would be interested in cleaning that up.

"Sorry." Ichigo croaked from the door way.

"Are you alright?"

He nodded weakly. "I'm going to brush my teeth."

He turned back into the bathroom, Grimmjow finished cleaning and glanced to Halibel who was giving him an amused look.

"You think this is funny?" Then he stopped, realizing he was still only in his boxers. "Shit."

"Don't mind me." She teased. He returned to the bathroom to grab his dirty clothes before changing into to clean ones but caught Ichigo swaying where he stood.

"Spit that out." He instructed. Ichigo obeyed, half missing the sink when he spit his toothpaste out.

"Shit you're making a mess."

"Sorry." Grimmjow dropped the clothes to take hold of Ichigo. The teen was attempting to put the toothbrush back in it's holder.

"Time for bed."

"No." Ichigo protested. "I want to shower."

"Fine I'll get you a bath, just sit there." He sat him on the toilet lid and took the dirty clothes out before the stunk up the bathroom. He was heading to his room to change for a second time when he heard the shower turn on.

"Dammit Ichigo, you'll fall over."

Ichigo was standing under the falling water, still covered by his boxers, but basking in the rain of water that beaded along his skin. He had a hand against the wall to support himself. For a moment, Grimmjow just watched him, struck by the sight of knotted orange hair plastered to his face, pale skin washing clean under rivulets of water. But most of all that sense of relief that washed though Ichigo, as he cleaned away the last torturous days.

Or at least he tried.

Grimmjow recognized the way his shoulders bunched, his head bowed. He was trying to hold it back, trying to let the water be his outlet but it wasn't enough. His other hand came up to cover his face.

"Ichigo..."

He moved to catch him when he started to sink to the tub floor. The sudden onslaught of hot water blinded Grimmjow for a second, but he got his arms around Ichigo's slim waist and held him from behind. The other slowly turned in the embrace, until his face was pressed into Grimmjow's shoulder.

Water bombarded them both, muffling the sound of tears. But they were short this time. Just a hint of the pain trapped inside of the teen. He leaned back a bit, to let the shower wash the tears from his face, before opening his eyes and looking up to Grimmjow. Blue locks were longer than Ichigo expected when wet, changing his features, no less attractive, just different. They watched each other for a long time, the despair in Ichigo slowly changing to something else.

"I need you." it was the only warning Grimmjow got before the hold Ichigo had on him tightened and he pushed up, locking their lips together.

The crisp mint freshness was still in his mouth. Neither wasted time with chaste kisses. They were in each others mouths from first contact. The supportive hand Grimmjow had around Ichigo moved to his head, pulling him deeper into him. Cascading water still ran between them, bringing their attention to every inch of their flesh. Their naked torsos touched; each time they breathed it brought the contact closer and their skin yearned for more. Ichigo half jumped but Grimmjow was already making the move and hoisted him up around his hips, leaning his back into the shower tile. Ichigo's legs locked firmly around him, and now he had the height advantage, delving down into Grimmjow's mouth.

He wanted to feel so much at once, his hands ran over Grimmjow's arms and shoulders until he took a firmer grasp and rocked against him. Grimmjow groaned into his mouth and their lips parted, both of them aware of the friction between them in another area.

"Fuck." Grimmjow dropped his head onto Ichigo's chest. "We can't do this."

"I'm okay." Ichigo insisted.

"You just got back from a session." his brain argued despite what his body wanted.

"Grimmjow I want this." He used one hand to draw Grimmjow's head back, make him look him in the eyes. "Take us to the bedroom."

Grimmjow stared at him hard, every inch of him fighting his animal urges. But the look in brown eyes was one of confidence, certainty and his grip shifted, he secured Ichigo around his lower back and took them from the shower into the bedroom.

They landed as one on the sheets, groaning together when their impact made them connect harder. Grimmjow leaned down and kissed Ichigo a little harder than in the shower, hand on either side of him supported his body. He was barely taller than Ichigo who had shot up a few inches since their last meeting, and he'd been here alot longer, and lost proportionally about the same amount of weight. Though neither had lost their muscle tone, their bodies still lean, neither could Grimmjow really be classified as the bigger of the two anymore. His frame was equally thin. But it didn't matter to either of them. This wasn't really about overpowering sexual attraction, it was about an overpowering connection that required closeness, intimacy.

Ichigo bucked up into him when he moved to his neck. He groaned and Ichigo responded by repeating the action. At this rate they would get to the finale still wearing their underwear.

"Fuck, Ichigo!" He gave up on his ministration when the teen grabbed his back tight, on either side of his hollow hole and held their hips together, grinding against him. Yep, it was already too late. Grimmjow gave up his attempts to do this properly and dropped to his elbows, lowering his hips into Ichigo's. With his participation, they didn't last long, the dual friction took them both over quickly. He dropped beside Ichigo so as not to blanket him with his weight. They panted for a long time in silence and stillness before Ichigo rolled on his side and moved in for another kiss.

Ichigo shuddered when Grimmjow began running his hands up and down his sides. Every touch seemed to leave a trail of fire in its wake. Ichigo didn't think he'd ever felt so hypersensitive, not even in a battle. This was so different, so good. He wanted to feel this forever, feel the heat of Grimmjow's body and know the other wanted him as much as he wanted him. He twisted himself closer to Grimmjow when the espdada's hands half massaged his lower back, switching between tight holds and teasing finger tips. Then his hand moved to his back and pulled him tighter, bringing their bodies flush, so he could deepen the kiss but also so their torso's touched, they felt each other's breaths and shivers.

Ichigo realized he'd just been holding Grimmjow back as hard as possible so he shifted his hand over shower slicked skin, feeling the edge of his hollow hole. Grimmjow stiffened, he took a break from their kiss and Ichigo's fingers continued to trail along until they hit rough flesh. Grimmjow went rigid and hissed out in pain.

"Shit, what is that?" Ichigo pulled his hand away.

"It's nothing."

But he saw the change in Grimmjow's features and eased back from him.

"Grimmjow are you hurt?"

"No. It's just an old scar. I guess it's sensitive."

"Oh."

"I'm fine."

"Okay." they locked lips again, a bit less heated now, Grimmjow was slow to relax again, and Ichigo tried to make it better, but his hands kept meeting scarred flesh, he didn't know what might hurt Grimmjow. So he lowered his hand to his boxers, running a teasing finger along the top edge.

Grimmjow pulled away again, pain creased through his features and he let go of Ichigo entirely.

"Grimmjow?" The teen rolled off the bed and turn on the lights. Grimmjow seemed just as alarmed by the reaction, sitting up on the bed and taking a gasping breath. "What is it?"

"I don't know." His hand hovered over his chest, as if he felt a pain he couldn't identify. Ichigo's eyes were now taking in all the scars on Grimmjow's body. Though he himself had suffered greatly, he had never been strung up and tortured in the same way as the two espada.

"Shit, Grimmjow, I never realized." He had seen the scars on his wrists and arms, but he had rarely seen Grimmjow without his shirt on since he'd been here. His eyes trailed down to his legs that were just as scarred. He looked to where his hand hand been and saw the terrible scar that rose at an angle from under the hem of his shorts, above the crease in his hip.

"What did that?"

"An electric rod."

Ichigo's hand moved to the hem but his wrist was caught in a vice grip. "Grimmjow how far down does it go?"

"I'm still functional if that's what your asking."

"It's not." Ichigo pried his hand free. "It's okay, Grimmjow." He dropped his hand to his thigh but Grimmjow instantly pushed it off.

"Just..." he stood and moved away. "don't."

Ichigo rose slowly, watching the change in Grimmjow's breathing, he threw the door open and left the room.

"Grimmjow." Ichigo followed him out, Grimmjow couldn't go far but he slammed the door shut on the bathroom before Ichigo could reach him.

"Shit."


"Grimmjow. I didn't expect you after that whole shower scene."

The door to the bathroom had been open the whole time, he'd known she wouldn't let that go but he looked to her now as he dropped on her bed an watched her where she sat at the desk and anger seemed to win out.

"Yes you did. You knew I couldn't go through with it."

"I did."

"How?"

Now the smug hint in her eyes left. She straightened in her seat.

"You know why. You always say you're okay, you're unaffected but you are."

"I can handle a little pain in my scars."

"I'm not talking about that." She looked meaningfully to his hip, now covered with a change of clothes.

"Halibel he didn't burn anything essential." He found himself defending for the second time. "Just my leg."

"I know." She intoned like he was an idiot. "but the day he did that he also-"

"Sorry. Halibel I'm such an idiot." He dropped his head into his hands. "I keep saying I'm unaffected and I never realized how that must sound to you. After what happened to you, what I saw, what I couldn't stop- please don't think it doesn't haunt me all the time."

Her hand startled him, drawing his face back up to her. "I don't want you to feel guilty about that. I know you didn't mean it like that when you said you were fine."

"Still, I am sorry."

"And I told you to stop apologizing. I think you need to have this conversation with Ichigo."

"How? It's going to be pretty awkward."

"Of course it is. But do you really want them to come take him away again while things are unresolved between you two?"

"No."

"Good. Then I'll stay in here and give you your privacy since you seem to have trouble closing doors." the smile was back in her eyes and he scowled, closing her door tight behind him.

He was on the couch, laying on his stomach with his head in his elbow. He'd never looked more like a child.

"Ichigo."

He sat up at once.

"Grimmjow, I'm sorry."

The espada balked a little a this, coming around to sit next to him. "I thought it was me who screwed up."

"You didn't screw up, it was me, I was moving too fast."

"Whoa, Ichigo, I was okay with that. I want that. But last night, I just...I guess I kind of froze."

"It's fine."

"Why are you so understanding?"

"You want me to be mad?"

"Most people would be. I haven't even explained myself." Ichigo quieted. He seemed to consider something before asking a question.

"Is it about Halibel?"

"Yes. Wait, not like that. I mean, she's my kin."

"You can't stop thinking about what they did to her?"

Grimmjow shook his head. "It's always there, in the back of my mind."

"That's terrible."

"All I can think is if that's how it is for me, how does she cope?" Ichigo had no answer.

"I don't know how to explain what happened last night. What we were doing had nothing to do with what happened to her."

"That scar does though, does it?"

Grimmjow covered the spot with his hand, even though it was concealed under clothing. "Yeah."

"Tell me." It wasn't a demand, just a request, to help him understand. So, Grimmjow did. Once he started, he could see the room, feel the burning shocks that tore through him. But more than anything, he could see the face of that man, rubbing the rod over his flesh as if it was doing something else. The scar he left in his hip was from sexual desire, not for torture. He'd had lust in his eyes, and it had terrified the sixth espada. But then he'd turned that on Halibel.

Ichigo was visibly shaken by what was recounted. Grimmjow was also surprised how much he was affected by reliving the moment. He glanced to Halibel's door to make sure she wasn't where she could hear them.

"Thank you." Ichigo breathed shakily at the end. "And I'm so sorry that happened to her- to both of you."

"You'll never be as sorry as me, Kid." he rose and retrieved the bottle of liquor. "So what do you say we try again?"

He took a long slug and handed the bottle to the teen who followed him over to the table. He took a drink too and pressed himself into Grimmjow.

"No."

"No?" The other questioned, confused by Ichigo's conflicting stance and words.

"Let's hold off, on the serious part okay? I just want to stay close to you until they come again."

"You don't trust me now?"

"I don't trust myself now. And it's just not right. Neither of us really know what we're doing." "I do, Ichigo I want this."

"You think that now but-"

"But what? What do you think is going to change?"

"Anything. Everything. If that's not okay with you, I understand."

He waited, tense against him. Grimmjow ground his molars together but relented. "So no sex?"

"Not now."

"I won't flip out again."

"But I might. I'm exhausted Grimmjow, all the time."

This, he could accept. "Fair enough." they each took another swig before engaging again. With the knowledge this was not to going to escalate, they took their time to just enjoy one another. Grimmjow hoisted Ichigo onto the table and leaned into him, their tongues melding slowly, intimately without the fever of earlier. By the time they got to the couch, the tiredness in Ichigo was already clear. Grimmjow picked him up and got him into the bedroom. They rolled together under the sheets. Hearts were still pounding, but they quickly found peace in one another's company and fell asleep.


They were eating breakfast when the soldiers came for Ichigo. Grimmjow woke up some time later, a cut above his eye had created quite the slew of blood that ran into his hair. He couldn't stand without help from Halibel.

"You know fighting won't help. They'll take him anyway." "I know." But it wasn't in his nature to just give up. He sat on the couch with a throbbing head ache but the door opened again and he knew from the swell of power without turning it was the King.

He just stood and watched Grimmjow, until the espada was so unnerved he spoke.

"What?"

"I'm deciding."

"Deciding what?"

"How far to let this go."

Blue eyes narrowed. He had long suspected the King watched them in here but he had forgotten that in the heat of the moment with Ichigo.

"He will be undergoing the final stages of his reeducation soon, and you will see him disappear."

Grimmjow stood. "You're going to take his mind now?"

"Yes. This will be the last session in the chair. His quincy powers are completely dominant over his others. His hollow powers are all but washed away, which is for the best. But he still maintains the power of all three aspects of his soul. Zangetsu will stitch himself together as a different entity and be more powerful than what you can imagine. But his mind remains his. So now I must take that too."

"And you don't need me to comfort him any more if you want to break his mind."

"Exactly. I believe that breaking you, would be as effective as breaking him."

Grimmjow took a step back. "You couldn't break me before, so you won't break me now."

Cold hands had him, he could never escape that speed. The King leaned close and whispered in his ear, "You broke so badly you don't even remember it happening." Grimmjow couldn't control his startled breath.

"You're lying."

"You couldn't cope with what happened to you, so hid it way and lied to yourself. And now you're this: this pathetic, sick in the head creature I've kept for my own amusement and study." He let him go and backed up. "That is why Ichigo won't let you get any closer. Because he knows the truth, and he doesn't want to take advantage of someone so...damaged."

His words, his menace, his- honesty strangled Grimmjow into silence. He watched the King leave, feeling everything in him shake. But not from anger.


Fewf, first sexual scene, don't think it's exactly my area, lol. This story is way out there for me, it got ooc and is a very different direction making Ichigo and Grimmjow a couple but I thought I'd try it. Not sure how I feel about it but I am looking forward to getting the rest of this fic published because there are some other things going on in this story that I do love. Hope you are enjoying my experiments in creative writing, haha, it's an experience for sure, lol.

Riza.