And so the group was escorted by six very airy looking stallions towards the stronghold with Hettar running naked and in all his four in the front
And so the group was escorted by six very airy looking stallions towards the stronghold with Hettar running naked and in all his four in the front.
No human could be seen. Horses of all sizes and breeds were booing and whining at them. One of them even tried to make an obscene gesture with its middle finger...but discovered horrified that there was no middle finger and had to content itself with cursing on its horse tongue.
All the sorcerer population was still unconscious, except Durnik and so Ce'Nedra nudged him painfully on the ribs.
"Aw!" the smith complained and hit her on the back of the head. Ce'Nedra kicked him on the knee and Durnik hit her on the face again
"Aw, you fucO.oing idiot!" she bawled furiously before charging against him.
The two of them hit at each other clumsily on the floor till two horses got in and got them separated.
"I was going to ask you if you couldn't do something to release us?!" the mini-minotaur hissed angrily after they calmed down
"What do you expect me to do? I'm just a smith. I can't melt them and turn them into...a casserole or something!" He started laughing at his own jock. When no one laughed with him he blushed and frowned.
"You are a sorcerer now. Sizzled them away!"
Durnik seemed horrified
"Are you insane?! They are horses!"
"Evil horses"
"You are an evil minotaur and I'm not after killing you...not now anyway"
"But I'm not taking us all to the dungeon!!"
"Look, we are going to talk with Hettar as soon as we get to wherever he is taking us and we will clear this out"
"Hettar isn't acting very normally to me"
"No one is!"
"I'm"
"No you are not!! You are a minotaur!!"
"And you are a psycho so what?"
"I'm taking my pills, okay?!"
Finally they arrived to the stronghold. Hettar sat in a huge mountain of straw and stared at them regally.
"You have been accused of practising slavery on the realm of freedom." He stated angrily
Barak, Lelldorin, Ce'Nedra and Durnik just stared at him and then exchanged quizzical glances. Finally, Barak pushed Durnik forward.
"Hum..." The smith babbled "I...neither of us is a slave, Hettar. You know that. You have travelled with us"
"I have" Hettar said mournfully "And I regret it! I was like you once, like you, like my father but the horses helped me to discover my true self. I'm a horse trapped in the body of an evil Homo sapiens!!"
All the horses whined and kicked the floor with their hooves.
Barak sobbed
"And I'm a women trapped in the body of a man!!"
"Oh, shut up!!" Hettar snarled "Have your crisis identity in your own time. It's my chapter, my crisis identity"
Barak grumbled something under his breath
"Horses, you are victims of their mistreatment! Talk now!"
The horses of the gung exchanged glances and then nodded and whined in agreement
"Betrayers!!" Ce'Nedra screamed indignantly
The stallions closed ranks around them and bared their teeth. Ce'Nedra yelped and backed away. Once she was safely hidden behind Barak, she raised her middle finger and shown it to the horses. They started glanced at their fingerless hooves and kicked the floor furiously. Soon all the horses on the stronghold were whining and kicking.
Hettar jumped out of his "throne" to land in front of Ce'Nedra.
"YOU THINK YOU ARE BETTER BECAUSE YOU HAVE MIDDLE FINGERS, UH?!"
Ce'Nedra stared at him wide eyed.
"WELL HERE YOU HAVE YOUR MIDDLE FINGER!!" Hettar put his closed hand with his middle finger raised right in front of Ce'Nedra's muzzle. All the horses raised and whinnied excitedly. "Take them to the dungeon!" the lord of the horses said disdainfully "There they will have time to think of what they have done and of oh how so great they are"
Durnik slapped Ce'Nedra on the back of the head.
They were taken to the dungeon of the horses: the stables. There Belgarath who has never fallen unconscious but was terribly busy rubbing his aching eyes stopped rubbing his eyes.
"Stupid Hettar!" he growled irritably. "I'm going to kill him!!"
Durnik and Barak jumped and hold him.
"There are too many horses" The smith said "We need to arrive to Drasnia and we wont be able to do reach it alive with an army of horses trying to kill us."
"And of cows" Ce'Nedra informed, looking outside trough the little window on the stable.
They all got closed and saw the horses and the cows talking. The biggest cow looked down at her feet after the white stallion pointed it to her and then the cow frowned and glanced furiously at the stables where they were locked at and nodded to the horse and then to the other cows. Both herds walked angrily towards the stronghold bawling and whining and waving flags of the Cattle Movement.
Belgarath started cursing in several languages again.
Suddenly Barak screamed. They all turned to him. Poledra was nailed into his ass, her jaws firmly closed into his delicate flesh. The huge Cherek ran from one place to the other, howling like a woman in distress and waving his arms. In his desperation, he broke the door of the stable.
"Yes!" they all screamed in unison and walked silently out of their cell.
Barak was massaging his sore ass and sobbing in a corner. Poledra was spitting and hacking in the middle of the stable.
"Very smart" Lelldorin congratulated her "It seems not all of you are idiots"
"Yeah" Poledra growled and spitted Barak "That will teach you to hit me"
Lelldorin regretted having talked.
"Okay, we have to escape" Belgarath stated the obvious "There are still a few hours till night and those stupid animals aren't guarding us. We are going to wait until night falls and then we will leave. Meantime, I don't care what you do but Poledra and I are going to be in that dark corner and we will be very busy"
"It's not necessary to wait till night" Lelldorin said smugly "I have an idea"
"We don't care. Poledra, come along"
"We are going to pass as horses."
"I don't look like a horse" Ce'Nedra said in the tone of someone who has been severely insulted.
"Like a cow rather" the just waken Garion mumbled from behind her. She growled and hit him on the mouth.
"We have sorcerers among us" The asturian reminded them rolling his eyes upwards "It's not necessary to look like horses. We will be horses"
"That could work" Durnik nodded in agreement. "I don't know how I missed that"
"Because you don't have my superior intellect, that's why"
Durnik frowned and blushed.
"Okay, sounds good, sounds great. But we will do it later." Belgarath insisted, trying to pull Poledra away with him. "We will wait till night"
"Why?" They all asked in unison.
"Because I have needs!!"
"Oh, don't be silly" Poledra said, pushing her hand away.
Belgarath sobbed, cursed and finally agreed.
After some minutes they were all enhorsed and encowed. Well, only Ce'Nedra has been encowed. She was furious about it, but no one listened to her.
"Hey! Polgara is still sleeping!" Durnik noted horrified, staring at the corner where Polgara laid face down surrounded by several bottles of wine. "Evil horses!"
"We will have to leave her behind!"
"Poledra!"
"Oh, fine! We will take her along then"
Durnik went towards her and touched her shoulder. Polgara jumped and throw a blow into his muzzle.
"Its mine spoon!" she screamed hysterically and then glanced crazily around.
"Stop playing around Polgara" Poledra whined at her. "Turn yourself into a horse so was can leave this place, now"
Polgara turned into a waving horse and finally they were able to leave the stable.
