Like i said, I'll try my best to finish the stories i have. You can guarantee me, Amonraphoenix, and DarkUnderworld will finish this story. So i'm still kind of here until this story finishes, but when it does I'll try to get farther into my other stories, but no new stories :(.
Maybe it wasn't the last time... Enjoy!
Chapter 7
Leo paced back and forth with agitation as he rubbed his chin worriedly. His mind was consumed with nothing but worry, fear and trepidation regarding his two brother's Michelangelo and Donatello. Donnie's screams just before they were cut off was stomach churning; so much so that Leo almost threw up, as an all-consuming fear consumed him, ripping through his stomach and churning the meagre contents around. He knew that his brother's had survived the earthquake, but now he was unsure if they survived the aftershock.
Leo stopped pacing and stared out the window, the brisk early December day dawning bright as the police, city crews and civilians cleaned up the streets, and searched for the injured or the dead. But because of multitude of people roaming the streets, had kept himself, and Raph from rushing to the lair to help search for their own brothers. The journey to the lair was too risky to attempt.
This fact and the impotent inability to do anything to help their brothers filled Leo with hot, sticky waves of betrayal and fear that swirled and rose around him, stealing the very breath from his lungs and causing his heart to constrict in fearful pain.
The need to act, the need to charge out to see if their brothers were still alive was overwhelming. It took every ounce of his willpower not to go running from April's apartment; abandoning every single rule and code their father had instilled within him since they could walk.
"We can't just sit here and do nothing!" Raph roared in frustration.
April and Leo stared at him in shock. "And what do you suggest we do, Raph?" Leo asked his brother wearily, already knowing his brother's answer and having to restrain his own urge to agree with what his brother was about to say.
"Get the hell out of here and go help Mikey and Donnie!" Raph yelled angrily as he launched himself off the couch and began to pace, his sais held within a white knuckled grip, as if they were somehow comforting to his brother.
"We can't risk being seen(,) Raph." Leo mumbled the words not believing them any more than Raph would.
"So you just want to stay here while Mikey and Donnie could be lyin' there dyin', buried beneath tons of rubble, all alone in the lair?" Raph ground out through clenched teeth. "They might be even...dead... !" Raph choked out at such a painful thought.
"It isn't safe, Raph." April said reasonably. "The streets are in chaos, there are too many people, officials and military walking around and the buildings are structurally unsafe. If you go out there someone could see you, and it may be military that sees you and captures you or shoot you. Or a building could collapse on you and if any of those things happened to you, you wouldn't be able to help Mikey or Donny." April finished in a faint, fear and worried filled voice.
"Then what the hell are we going to do?" Raph snarled out, his frustration and fear for their younger brothers palpable.
"There's not much we can do right now but wait. We don't know how extensive the damage to the lair is and we don't know how much rubble is blocking the tunnels leading to the lair and the entrance into our home." Leo tried to keep his voice calm even though each word he spoke shot a new wave of choking fear through him.
"So that's it? That's your great plan? We wait it out?" Raph spat out angrily as he glared at Leo whose own temper was simmering hotly, just below the surface. " Or have you forgotten that it's the first week of December, and the temperature at night is freezing." Raph shouted as he pointed a finger at the living room window that was covered in a light layer of fresh snow.
"Raph, none of us like this situation any more than you do…but Leo's right we have to wait it out" April said as she quickly dashed away tears that had begun to roll down her cheeks.
Raph stopped pacing as he glared at everyone who was assembled in the room. Leo could see the waves of anger and fear that were radiating around his brother, but there was nothing they could do. April was right, there were too many people outside to risk sneaking around.
Leo stepped towards his hotheaded brother. "We'll wait until tonight, when it's dark and the crowds die down a bit, then we'll be able to make our way back to the lair hopefully unobserved and unimpeded by the humans." Leo said firmly, trying to get Raph to calm down and accept his judgment, even if none of them agreed with it, including himself.
Leo's heart leapt into his throat in shock as Raph kicked April's dining room chair, causing it to flip over and clatter noisily to the ground in pieces. "Fuck that!" Raph shouted hoarsely, "I'm going to rescue Mikey and Donny!" He yelled angrily as he turned and walked to the window, placing his sais in his belt and sliding the window open, "You might not care about them, but I do" Raph accused, the stinging remark striking Leo straight through the heart and twisting painfully.
"Raph!" Leo shouted, his voice nearly breaking with repressed despair and hurt.
Raph swung his leg over the window and was about to step out, but a voice made him stop.
"Raphael!" Master Splinters voice snapped out sternly.
Raph took a steadying breath and then slowly turned his head, seeing his father standing at the end of the hallway.
"Return" Their father barked sharply.
Raph grunted, seemed to think about ignoring their father's order and then with his shoulders slumping in defeat swung his leg back into April's apartment reluctantly.
"Kneel…my son" Master Splinter ordered softly but with a hint of steel in his voice that brooked no opposition.
"Come on Mas-" Raph tried anyway.
"Kneel!" Master Splinter snapped abruptly.
Raph sighed and then fell on both knees hard.
Master Splinter took a calming breath before speaking, "I know you are worried about Michelangelo and Donatello, we all are," Master Splinter glanced at Leo before continuing, "But we cannot risk you or Leonardo being hurt, injured or taken by a rash decision. We must remain strong and together."
"But Master, the longer we wait, the more chance they have of dying." Raph said his voice breaking with worry. His earlier anger had vanished under the crushing weight of helplessness.
"You must not think like that, Raphael." Master Splinter said calmly as he placed a comforting hand on Raph's shoulder. "Your brothers are strong and smart, they have survived more troubling and dangerous situations. They have each other, they will be okay." Splinter said in firm confidence.
Silence quickly settled throughout the apartment like a heavy blanket, each consumed with their own chaotic thoughts.
"How do you know?" Leo finally asked the question they had all been wanting to ask, but were too afraid to ask.
Splinter slowly looked up at him, then sighed tiredly, "I don't" He replied truthfully. Worry falling heavily upon Leo's shoulder at the two small words. "But I am hopeful that this is indeed the case." Master Splinter hastily reassured his son's and their friend.
"Have you tried meditating to contact them?" April asked softly as she wrapped her arms around herself as if seeking comfort and not being able to find any.
"Yes, I was able to get fragments from Michelangelo, merely small desperate thoughts, but he would not answer my repeated calls. But with Donatello, I was unable to contact him at all, though I am unsure as to why." Master Splinter admitted, a hint of worry entering their father's voice.
"Can you try Michelangelo again?" Leo asked in desperate hope.
"I will try…but I cannot promise anything." Master Splinter replied softly as he turned around and walked slowly back in to April's bedroom.
April gave Leo a worried look and then followed Master Splinter, leaving him and Raph alone.
The silence in the room became oppressive. Leo could hear Raph's short, quick anger breaths as his brother seemed to struggle with himself. Leo felt as though he should break the suffocating silence and the thick tension that floated around his brother and himself, but he was unable to think of anything to say, his mind too full of fear and worry.
"I'm sorry." Raph finally grumbled out his voice sounding strained with apprehensive worry and guilt.
Before Leo was able to speak Raph continued. "It's just... knowing that Mikey and Donnie are down there right now, trapped, scared and possibly badly hurt; it…it makes me feel like I am going to lose my mind if we don't do something right now! I ain't good at waitin' Leo, you know that."
Leo didn't reply to his brother's words, just waited until his brother finished what he needed to say.
"I didn't mean to say what I said." Raph said gruffly. "I know you care about us and I had no right to tell you that you didn't." Raph swallowed hard, trying to keep the wretched misery and fear from his voice. "I need to know that they're still alive." Raph croaked out sadly in a small broken whisper.
"I know you're scared, Raph" Leo began softly, "But... I'm here…and so are Master Splinter and April. We'll rescue Mikey and Donnie, they're fine." He told his brother comfortingly needing to believe his own words.
Raph nodded, trying to keep the tears that had welled up in his eyes from falling. "But what if they're not?" Raph asked harshly, his anger rising to cover the misery and uncertainty that plagued his heart.
Leo exhaled slowly and then inhaled, "I just…I can't think that they aren't okay, because if I do I won't be able to function anymore. I will be useless and they need us." He insisted.
Raph dragged shaking fingers down his face as he tried to control his helpless anger. "I…I can't stop thinking about the phone call." He admitted miserably as he looked up at his older brother.
Leo slowly inhaled and exhaled, walked up to Raph, and held his hand out toward his still kneeling brother. Raph looked at the hand and then up at his brother. Leo as he had the perfect view of the glimmering tear drop as it slid out of Raph's eye and rolled down his cheek.
Raph finally grabbed his hand and lifted himself up, wrapping his arms around Leo's shoulders and squeezing him tightly in a big bear hug.
"I'm so sorry Leo…I'm so sorry," Raph said quietly.
"It will be okay Raph." Leo whispered back softly, nuzzling his cheek against the top of Raph's head and closed his eyes as they both silently wept out their despair and helplessness on each others shoulders.
*********
Mikey rocked back and forth, holding the limp body of his brother while muttering softly to himself. "They aren't real, they aren't real, I'm just hallucinating. I'm just hallucinating."
He clenched Donnie more tightly, wanting him to come back and tell him that everything was going to be OK. But his brother remained still and unresponsive in his arms as Mikey began to shiver with cold.
He shifted slightly in the bathtub, trying to take his mind off of the gruesome hallucinations that he was experiencing. He covered his nose in disgust as the rank fumes of the liquids in the toilet permeated his nostrils. It was horrible not being able to flush. The pungent stench just sat there and lingered around in the bathroom, making it smell like an outhouse.
Mikey shifted his position again, not able to find one that he could manage to stay in and remain comfortable. He ran his hand down Don's arm and grabbed his brother's cold, limp hand. Holding Don's hand he could feel the cold drifting from his brother's hand into his own. He bit his lip, feeling his heart crumble and shatter into pieces.
Don was dead. He really was…dead.
Mikey couldn't stop the flood of tears that began to roll unabated down his cheeks. After years of seeing Donnie every single day; talking with him, playing video games with him, fighting alongside him, and just being with him. Now he was gone, just like that. And there was nothing that he could have done to prevent his brother's death.
He inhaled sharply, "I'm so sorry, Donnie." Mikey said wretchedly as he hugged his brother's body tighter to his own. "I am so, so sorry. It should have been me. You pushed me out of the way, but it should have been me that got killed. You're dead because of me." He choked out as tears of despair dripped from his chin to land on his brother's cheek, where they rolled quietly down to pool on his still neck.
"Michelangelo"
Mikey's head snapped up as he looked around in horror for the source of the ghostly voice.
"Hello?" He ventured shakily.
"Michelangelo? Can you hear me?" asked the now very familiar voice.
Mikey's eyes widened in shock in recognition of his father's gentle voice. "Master?... Father?" Mikey croaked out in disbelief and distrust.
"Yes Michelangelo," Master Splinter confirmed calmly with obvious relief in his voice.
"Is…is this for real?" Mikey stammered, unable to believe that his father was actually talking with him.
"Yes my son," Master Splinter replied steadily.
"No…No." Mikey shook his head wildly in disbelief. "This is just another stupid hallucination." Mikey hissed angrily.
"Michelangelo…trust me…it really is me." Master Splinter reassured him.
"…Father?" Mikey choked out softly, tears of misery continuing to fall from his eyes.
"It is alright my son, I am here…There is no need to be frightened. Are you okay my son? Are you hurt?" Master Splinter asked.
Mikey inhaled sharply, "Yeah" he said quickly, "Yeah I'm…I'm hanging in there. I'm not hurt too badly."
"Good." His father's voice said softly before continuing. "Michelangelo… Do you know where Donatello is?" His father asked, his voice laced with worry and fear.
Mikey sniffed, "He...he...he's" Mikey managed between choked, heart wrenching sobs that prevented him from speaking the words he dared not say.
"Michelangelo?" Splinter insisted worriedly.
Mikey sobbed harder, "He's dead... he… Donnie's dead" Mikey placed his palm on his forehead and sobbed uncontrollably.
He lay in the deafening silence of the bathroom, clutching his big brother tightly and, crying into his dead brother's icy cold shoulder in despair.
"Father?" Mikey asked desperately, but heard nothing but silence.
"Sensei? Are you there?"
Nothing but silence.
Mikey began to sob, "Please…come back father…Don't leave me alone" Fresh warm tears rolled down Mikey's cheeks as he begged his father to keep talking to him. But Splinter wasn't responding, leaving Mikey alone once again.
********
"He's dead…he…Donnie's dead." Michelangelo choked out between heart wrenching sobs.
Master Splinter snapped his eyes opened, breaking the connection and losing Michelangelo instantly. He froze, saying and doing nothing.
"Sensei?" Leo asked softly seeing the indecision reflected in Master Splinter's eyes as he entered the room with Raph trailing behind him.
Master Splinter's eyes moved across the room and finally locked onto Leo's worried ones.
Leo stared at his father, unable to understand the empty look that had fallen over his father's features until he saw the single tear trickle down his father's furry cheek.
Leo's heart seized and then shattered as he looked at his father desperately.
"Donatello," Master Splinter whispered very softly in a broken voice.
He didn't need to say anymore, Leo fell to his knees in grief, letting out a violent howl of raw grief and anguish as hot tears scored his cold, pale cheeks.
"NO!" Leo cried out loudly.
"Donnie? Oh God no…No!" Raph roared in denial as he slammed his fist repeatedly into the wall of April's bedroom. "NO GOD PLEASE!" Raph screamed as he wiped the tears from his own pale cheeks.
April fell against the wall and collapsed into the corner, weeping softly to herself.
Master Splinter closed his eyes in misery at the knowledge that one of his sons was dead, and another was trapped, frightened and alone; save for the corpse of his deceased brother. The despair was overwhelming, the fresh, raw grief of his remaining sons and their friend was too much to bear. He hung his head in anguish and gave into the silent tears that trickled down his wet, fur covered cheeks.
