hi!
uhmmmm ... let's see. i've got some interesting stats for you. first thing is: the usual number of rpc (reviews per chapter) suddenly, very suddenly, spiked. huh? could it be that the latest twist i added sort of urged you to speak up?! what was so exceptional about it? ehehe ...ducks down yeah, i already know, i'm evil. already told you that much ...
secondly: van kinda got a disputed position. two of you dubbed him evil, one reader wanted him to act up, while two pitied him. do as you please, but remember: DON'T EVEN THINK OF TOUCHING VANNIE ...
third thing: death threats and other emotions ... i actually got one death threat, got dubbed an evil person, unfair, a sadist and satan as well ...! don't worry, i can handle whatever you chuck at my head ... if these are all the bad names you can manage, i'll have to provoke more, don't i? let's see what i can do ...maniacal grin
fourth: now this is the last straw! my poor stiliani got insulted, you even wanted to push her off the balcony ... aieeee, that hurts. i have SO tried to make her nice and pretty and all, and STILL you threaten her! honestly, folks, she can't do anything about her role in this story, she's only doing what i make her do. it's all my fault! leave her alone!
well, what more to say ?! ah, yeah, this: enjoy the new chapter! fyi, i will finally introduce a beloved character!
i don't claim any rights concerning the characters introduced in this story; they belong to kawamori – sensei and co. the plot, however, is mine, so please no plagiarism. if you find any language mistakes, please tell me and i'll be glad to correct them.
and now as usual, on with the show! cheers, akari
Colours
Chapter 7
Caleidoscope
Hurried steps made me turn around. A rush of scarlet scurried down the length of the entrance hall, a pleasant voice happily twittering away to the waiting-woman who trailed in her wake.
Princess Stiliani.
Coming from the direction of Van's office, I figured that she had to be exceptionally happy, just because she was scuttling across the hall in such an ... undignified ... way. Unlike now, it was rare for her to forget her good breeding any time. She was always so controlled. Serene. Disciplined. I had never seen her either laugh exuberantly, cry or blow up in anger. Everything about her was moderate and diplomatic. She was the epitome of a true princess.
Unlike myself.
With a deep sigh, I continued up the hall. Originally, I had been on my way to see my patients again, but as the Princess' appearance upset me once more, as it already had many times, I decided to take an immediate break on my favourite bench in the garden. Ever since Stiliani had stepped into my life two weeks ago, this is what I always did in situations like that.
To be more precise, this is what I always did ever since Princess Stiliani of Derval stepped into Van's life. As his fiancée.
Fiancée.
The word still left a stale taste in my mouth. Every time I recalled the harsh truth of my situation, my heart started beating madly and tears welled in my eyes. From time to time I failed to suppress the tears of misery that the thought of Van's loss repeatedly brought up, but all in all I had greatly improved. Thanks to the fact that I kept myself continually occupied, the constant nagging and pining of my heart for the love of my life had numbed to a considerable amount.
Another shaky sigh escaped my lips as I sat down. It was so unfair. I had always had a fairly positive opinion of myself. I had been content with my appearance and had always thought my character sort of agreeable, though I had to admit that Yukari had sometimes used to call me a bitch.
Now, in an 'eat shit or die'- attitude, and as if to test my resolution to the utmost, Fate chose exactly this moment of all to throw the Princess into my path, the one person who seemed to be destined to make me feel inferior, and in a moment in which my fate at Van's side was as unsure as ever no less. I paled in comparison to Princess Stiliani, and I hated to admit it.
Even Yone, who I had thought of as a confidante, an ally, lately had not been able to conceal how much she liked the young woman. Everybody liked her, and even I did, much against my will, because she was nothing short of cute.
Besides the fact that she was darn pretty, her impertubable good-will against everybody as well as her zealous attempts to assist Van in any way possible put it out of my power to be mad at her. Heck, in complete ignorance of MY connection to HER royal fiancé she had even tried to comfort me one day when she had accidentally found me crying in the garden. With the utmost resolution I had then been able to resist the temptation to tell her that it was SHE who was the reason for my sadness, and I had had to cry even harder as she had given me an awkward hug and had said something along the lines of: 'All will be well ...'
The fact that she obviously admired Van was not helpful either; and it was safe to assume that she did not only admire him. The sparkling smile she granted him wherever he appeared and the fiery glances she cast at him when she believed to be unobserved, spoke of more profound feelings towards Fanelia's King.
She fancied him and was hell-bent on pleasing him. The chance of her breaking up the engagement kept lowering towards zero, while her chances of marrying him anytime soon gradually increased in my eyes. Each new day witnessed a new all-time low on my side.
But the thing that hurt me most was that she even beat me with respect to my most prominent character trait ...
I had always been able to make people like me. Many friends had told me that somehow, I got under their skin and urged them to smile. Folken had said that, too, and so had, in a way, Van.
My charms had succeeded in achieving what nobody had ever deemed possible. I had befriended the gloomy young king and, at times, had made him smile. A long time ago, I had even made him fall in love with me. Finally I had discovered that I loved Van back and had begun to nourish hopes of being able to heal his troubled soul someday ... until someone arrived who had the same powerful spell under her command.
To see it all taken away by Stiliani was tough.
Eventually, Van got along with her just fine. She sought his presence quite often, and they would chat or discuss minor questions of etiquette or things like that. True, their conversations never got deep, and in general, Van remained as moody and reserved as ever, maybe even more so, never revealing the slightest feelings to her at all. Not even Stiliani was able to shake him out of his brooding when he was at it. Only I had been able to do that. Well, and this very capability had been taken out of my sphere of responsibility. Life was unfair.
I could never discern any symptoms of love in Van's behaviour towards her, too, but for me, it didn't matter whether he loved her or not. He would have to marry her, whatever his feelings were, and that meant that he was lost for me. The only weak consolation was that Van at least had some prospect of happiness with a wife who'd read his every wish from his eyes ...
Tears silently made their way down my cheek. Someday, time would be able to heal my wounds. Until then, I could only wait and suffer.
A light touch grazed my fingers. I looked up and locked gaze with cerulean irises.
Allen.
He had been a real comfort throughout the last days. As imperceptible as he often was, he couldn't have ignored the effect the latest events had had on me. It had felt good to see his concern, and the fact that he tried to remain close to me and seek my friendship boosted my frayed ego if nothing else. I frequently let him console me.
I knew that I was in need for his 'services' right now, so I motioned for him to sit down.
Carefully he lowered himself onto the bench by my side and placed a light kiss on my forehead in a very matter-of-fact way. I didn't miss the fact that his caresses had become more frequent and intimate recently, as well as had his signals that he was still interested and felt confirmed in his actions.
His arm wound around my shoulder and I stiffened slightly. Something was wrong in the self-confident way in which Allen claimed my nearness. He was far too close to me for far too often. Then again, it had been I who had failed to discourage his every attempt to approach me. From HIS point of view, I was anticipating his courting, and looking back at the past we both shared, the way he eagerly responded came quite naturally.
It was peculiar how years ago, I would have relished in the knowledge of having attracted such a man's affections, but now my insides were churning. Guilt and shame battled in my mind.
I quickly discovered that there were no feelings my obvious preference of him could be based on. I basked in his attentions without planning to reciprocate his feelings. Man, was I ever playing dirty on him!
For purely selfish reasons I had been encourageing these signals. Urged on by how good it had felt to be liked by somebody, even if that somebody was not the man I loved, I had deemed his affections helpful in a way as to soothe the grief I constantly felt about Van. Thus, I had purposefully led Allen on.
Granted, it had been too easy. A little smile here, a friendly word there, and soon he has been following me like the proverbial puppy ...
For a very short time, his company had really helped, sometimes even to the point that I thought I had already conquered my broken heart and had started to make plans with the blonde knight.
Now, however, I changed my mind. The amount of pain I had just felt at Stiliani's sight quickly taught me, that the place Van still had in my heart could never be filled by Allen. It was then that I realized that I had always considered Allen as a makeshift-lover. I had taken advantage of his attachment to me, just because I could have had him more easily.
I knew how it felt to be heart-broken, and the realization that I might deliberately be causing the same pain that I suffered myself to Allen flushed my features in shame. Very much aware that Allen was likely to understand my blush as a sign of positive embarassment, I decided to give him a broad hint about where my true affections lay and turned around to him.
"Hitomi," he murmured, "I am worried about you. It is obvious that your situation is wearing you down. Even the angel that you are can't bear the uncertainty for too long."
I gave him a faint smile and touched his hand.
"I'll be alright, Allen," I whispered. "If Van will be able to bear it, so will I."
A long silence followed before he spoke again.
"Why do you allow him to treat you like that? He uses you and then chucks you aside like an old boot. Were it not for the fact that I owed him loyalty as my liege, I would ..."
I interrupted him with a sudden gesture.
"Don't," I pleaded. "Don't talk about him like that. He can't do anything about it. His Council had arranged the marriage, and its constitutional power can't be overruled by Van. Fate played a nasty trick on me as well as on him. We just weren't meant to be, Allen!"
He shook his head and replied, "If I were in his place, I would have refused any other engagement. I would have chosen the woman which both my honour as well as my heart bound me to. I would have chosen you, Hitomi."
"Impossible," I mumbled, mortified, "you, too, would have chosen your country. In times like these, he can't afford to destabilize his own government by hazarding an advantageous political connection with a strong potential ally."
The truth of my arguments both assured and frightened me at the same time. The fact that Van's engagement to Stiliani was an inevitable evil at the same time cleared the young King of all charges.
Allen, however, didn't appear to be convinced. At his defiant countenance, I added more softly, "I am sure that your loyalty with respect to Astoria would have forbidden you to neglect your duties as to prefer a woman over the safety of your country, Allen. I'd have to be disappointed if it were any other way."
"Loyalty ...," was his fervent answer, "what is loyalty to your country against loyalty to your own heart? What can cause a man to desert what is closest to his heart, in favour of political reasons, even something as abstract as his country? What can your country give you which can't be easily outdone by the amazing gifts a beloved woman can give you?"
For a short moment, the shock of hearing such traitorous words from him turned me wordless. He was so much older that Van, but the younger man had always appeared so much more mature! It was unbelievable to what extent the Knight Caeli of Astoria, leader of an entire army with many responsibilities loaded on his shoulders was still capable of acting like a lovestruck teenager when it came to me.
The odd notion that something about his feelings was artificial and extravagant returned with a vengeance. Back when he had suddenly kissed me during the Great War I had been equally confused. Why did a man who had not taken any particular notice of me until then suddenly claim to be full-blown in love with me to a point that he made me a marriage proposal? Nah, I had a suspicion that Allen's feeling had been messed with, and someday I would have to get to the root of his emotional world and discover the How and the Why ...
His agitated face making it impossible for me to dwell on my last thoughts, I was forced to return to the matter at hand. Blushing furiously out of pure mortification, I shook my head, desperate to get him to shut up before someone heard him, but all to no avail. Allen got so carried away with his feelings that he wouldn't stop his rambling.
"If Van were my king, I would still despise him for turning traitor on the most exquisite and loveable creature whose presence ever graced this world's surface by abusing her so badly!" he seethed with glowing features. "It hurts me to no end to see you still sticking up for him, trying to take the blame away from his guilty head, as sweet as you are. It hurts me to see you suffer, Hitomi, can't you see that?"
His words immediately triggered a backflash of a different kind. I hate it to see you so unhappy, Hitomi. After all that happened to you I can't stand to cause you pain again ... Ruby eyes bore into my mind, looking unhappy and sad.
"Van," I groaned, and tears started to fall again. I was positive that he suffered as well, because I was the one who knew him best. His recent sullenness, his hardened features, how could Allen ever assume that Van had double-crossed me? Sobbing harder, I buckled and fell to the floor. Here we go again, I thought gloomily as, once again, my self-control shattered.
A strong arm caught me before my knees hit the ground. Before I knew what happened, Allen swept me up bridal-style, buried his face in my hair and hissed, "I'm going to make him pay for causing you such pain. I hereby take you back, Hitomi, and I will make you smile again like you did when you were mine ...", and with this, he bent down and kissed me fully on the lips.
Stunned, I was unable to react. A roaring, swirling mass of shock and confusion filled my head at Allen's sudden approach. His lips worked my liplock aggressively, almost bruising my skin, while his fingertips dug into my ribs, causing me to wince. After what seemed like an eternity, he stopped his ministrations and looked up. We stared at each other breathlessly, and his blazing gaze burned into my soul.
Smack him, my mind ordered, and I was about to obey when a strange noise met my ears. I scrambled out of Allen's grip and whipped around to see where it came from.
Van was standing a few metres away.
Instead of his usual regal attire, he was dressed in those simple but pracical clothes he had been wearing during the Great War. They made him look young and vulnerable. But what really shook me to the bone was the look of pure hurt and painful shock in his eyes. He so much looked like the pained, hunted creature I had met back then!
Mouth slightly agape in a silent cry, he stood there, shoulders hunched up, frozen in the momentum like I was, too. He moved his lips in a futile attempt to say something, but no sound came out.
Undoubtedly he had seen everything, and by the dull and wounded look in his ruby orbs he had expected anything else but the sight he had been greeted with.
Unable to do anything else, I cursed inwardly.
Damned be the moment in which I first admitted Allen's attentions again! Cursed be my egocentric behaviour that had led him to do what he just did! Wretched be the moment in which I remained frozen from shock instead of smacking Allen senseless, evoking the impression that I had just enjoyed Allen kiss!
Why the hell did I have to fuck up everything? Why?
Before Allen, who had already stretched out his hand towards me possessively, had the chance to even touch me, I gave him a resounding slap in his face, turned around and ran away, bawling like a baby.
....
I needed hours to recover from my recent 'adventure'.
My heart told me that Van had been looking for me. It was widely known that the garden was one of my favourite places to sulk, and my heightened senses had caught his anxiety as well. I couldn't get over the hurt in his eyes. What had he been on the point of doing? Ever since our last conversation on the evening of Stiliani's arrival, we had not talked at all about the situation. My outbreak of tears had effectively stopped any attempt to discuss our matter further, and I had run away. Had he been intending to pick up the topic and try to sort out our situation?
Anyway, it didn't matter much, now did it? Apart from the fact that the end of his engagement with Stiliani would immediately involve his country into a war against one of its most powerful allies, he was also sure to back off from any plan he might have had concerning me, as he had seen me in the arms of his rival, supposedly locked in an abundant kiss. There was no way he could have caught the real meaning of the situation!
I rose from my bed and staggered over to the full length mirror that hung at the opposite wall. My gaze wandered over slumped shoulders and a tear-covered face with droopy, bloodshot eyes.
"Hello, beauty," I hissed at my reflection, "are you happy now? You mindlessly fooled around with Allen's feelings, pushed Van into Stiliani's arms and got yourself a prime ticket for the Soul Train!" My reflection didn't answer, only tears pooled in her eyes for the thousandth time. The only thing I ever did correctly was cry.
A harsh knock thrummed at the door and caused me to flinch. The intruder didn't wait for my sign and tore through the door. It all happened in a blur of orange and a flash of claws. Stunned, I first held my right cheek, then the left, which were tainted flaming red and had begun to sting in mere seconds.
I looked up. Pale green eyes emitted sparks.
"What do you think you're playing at, Hitomi?!"
A familiar piercing voice split my ears, and a hard push knocked me against the nearest wall, completely winding me. Incredulously I stared into a feline face surrounded by reddish hair through which pointed ears were poking their tips. A lithe, now feminine body pinned me against the back wall of my room, literally vibrating with suppressed anger.
"Me ... Meruru-chan,"I gasped, „when did you ..." Another slap stopped me in my tracks. With a yowling screech she interrupted me, "It's ME who's doing the talking, woman !!!", grabbed my collar and repeated menacingly "What do you think you were playing at?"
My blank expression must have spoken volumes, because she gave an exasperated sigh, let go of me and flipped back her head haughtily.
"I ALWAYS knew she was a bit dense," she meowed to nobody particular, "I don't know why I EVER put up with her, thank you very much."
Man, this girl surely knew how to push all my buttons! A surge of annoyance flushed my features even more than her slaps had already done.
"Pay attention, kitten," I gnashed out between my teeth, "which particular incident are you talking about? You can't just barge in, knock me out and expect me to answer questions you didn't even ask properly. I'm not a mind reader, you know!"
The neko girl narrowed her eyes at 'kitten' and crowded me once again.
"You mean to say that you don't remember ANYTHING you should be ashamed of, Hi-to-mi?" The way she spat out the syllables of my name indicated that she was really pissed off. "Very well, then, how about we begin with the little SLAPSTICK you forced Lord Van to witness a few hours ago, huh? What about that? You remember, the one in which you actually KISSED Allen Shezar?!"
I tried to interrupt her, but she was too much enraged to chill down anytime soon. With flashing eyes she continued to yell into my face, exposing dangerously glinting fangs.
"Do you know how Lord Van MISSED you? You got him to fall in LOVE with you and then you not only LEFT him and returned to your damned world, but you ALSO didn't keep in touch either, leaving that man devastated and clueless as to what you REALLY felt for him. You took your sweet fucking time to FINALLY come to visit him, arrived half-dead and let him wonder what the hell had happened to you and whether you'd EVER recover. You allowed him to feed you up and as a thanks you let him get CAUGHT by a piece of shit fucking PRINCESS who nobody gives a DAMN about, while you spent your time snogging a womanizing airhead in order to get nicely lined up in his TROPHY COLLECTION. Dammit, Hitomi, GOOD JOB!!!"
"I DIDN'T KISS ALLEN," I bellowed, outraged. "Ooooh," she snipped back, "then how do you account for what Lord Van had TOLD me a couple of minutes ago? He SAW you throwing yourself into Shezar's arms when he came to look for you. WHO are you kidding?"
She inhaled deeply to send another cataract of reproaches in my direction, but I had already lost my nerve.
"WILL YOU CALM DOWN AND LISTEN," I screeched and she flinched and covered her sensitive ears. I used this moment to clamp one of my hands over her mouth, grab her wrists with the other and shove her against the nearest hard surface. This action was sure to raise her hackles immediately, and she wriggled against my grasp and hissed, but with desperate strength I held her in place.
"Listen," I rebuked her, "it's not the way you think it is. It was Allen who grabbed me and kissed me before I could stop him. I didn't want that, and I certainly didn't want Van to watch the whole scene. I LOVE Van and I could never hurt him, you should know that by now, you stupid wildcat." Again she spat something irrecognizeable while glaring daggers at me.
"I'll also have you know that it was VAN who first got engaged to this woman, but of course you didn't stop to think about what that meant to ME, did you? All you thought about was your precious Van and how HE would suffer. Well, you're in for a surprise, kitten: I am the one who is heartbroken, because Van left ME. He dumped me for that Princess, and if you ask me, he seems to be quite happy with her already. But never mind ME, little old Hitomi can cope with having their happiness rubbed in her face every day, after she left her home to come back to him ..."
My sobs violently shook my body. Meruru's eyes widened at once at the sight of my bitter tears. I had already lost all strength and her wrists slipped out of my grasp, but I didn't care. I was crying openly now.
"He didn't even MENTION the engagement to me! I was with the wolf-people when it happened, and as I came back it was Yone who told me that he had been designated for Princess Stiliani. Everybody keeps telling me what a nice and pretty girl she is and how happy they are going to be, and I can't stand it anymore ... The only one who seemed to understand my feelings was Allen, and he ... "I gulped, thinking of how to explain Allen's behaviour without having to allude to my own responsibility in the whole scheme, "he ... took it the wrong way, period."
During my last tirade I had slid down onto the floor, and so had the neko girl. Her face still wore an irritated look, but at least her fury appeared to have subsided. With a lowered head and flattened ears she began massageing her wrists which apparently had been caught in my vice grip for too long and only after a few minutes did she direct her words directly at me in an accusing voice.
"You may think what you choose to, but it's not Lord Van's fault," she announced and looked me directly into my eyes. I nodded reassuringly and she continued, "and whatever happened between Van and you, I can tell you one thing for sure: He won't be happy with this princess. No way. There's only one person he'll be happy with, and this person is you, Hitomi, whether you like it or not."
My shoulders slumped. With a few pointed words she had expressed what I'd dared not hope all the time. She knew Van's mind to a sufficient extent to be able to discern any feelings he might have with respect to other persons. She had just summarized what I had been ignoring for a long time and what I had deceived myself about.
Van didn't love Stiliani. He still loved me.
"Anyway," Meruru's snubby words jerked me out of my musings, "I didn't step aside for a silly PRINCESS. I want Lord Van to be happy, and it's bad enough I had to leave him to YOU. I won't have this finicky girl catch him, that's for SURE."
As downtrodden as I was, I had to snicker nontheless. Her refreshing, jaunty self-confidence had not changed over the years. Deep down, I had always missed her, even as I was back on Earth. However, her next words effectively stopped my short bout of carelessness.
"If you loved him, as you claimed a couple of moments ago, then how come you didn't INTERVENE, Hi-to-mi? You didn't even ..." her eyes glinted maliciously, "... TELL him that you loved him."
"I did," I murmured weakly, only to be interrupted by her shrill voice. Boy, even as a full-grown woman her voice had not changed a bit. It was a lilting, childish wail which, when turned on full blast, shattered the inside of my ears.
"Liar," she yowled, "he told me that you took it all BACK. He thought you didn't love him anymore. And you know what, he suspected Shezar right away. Goddammit, Hitomi, the man was DEPRESSED, because he thought you had resumed your relationship with Shezar again. He thought you'd been PLAYING with him." She rolled her eyes heavenwards, mewling "MAN, I don't reckon this stupid girl really takes the situation SERIOUS enough ..."
"But I DO!" I rebuffed, "I love him. What else do you want me to say? I just thought he liked Stiliani and didn't want him to worry about me. I ..." Her doubting look forced me to finally spill the beans and bare my secret to her.
With a low voice I added, "I really love him. He's my life, my love, my everything. He's all that I have left of my life, and to lose him would be the worst thing that could happen to me. All these years on Earth I have been wondering what he did and whether he was happy, and more than once I wished I had never left him at all. I have sworn to make him happy ... and as it appeared that he wanted Stiliani, I planned on letting him go so that he could have her. That's why I told him to marry her."
After a moment of silence, Meruru quietly asked, "You REALLY would have watched him marry that girl without so much as a blink of an eye?" I nodded.
"Yes. Whatever he wants, I have sworn to make sure he gets it. And as long as he's happy, I will be happy as well. For his sake, I will be strong and bear whatever is necessary to satisfy him. This is a promise I made after I ... returned to Gaia. "
Meruru stared at me for a long time. Finally she muttered "Pathetic humans," shook her head and started to shuffle out of the room.
"Tell you what," she quipped, turning back to me, "you messed it all up, and if you don't have the GUTS to set it right again, I will take care of you and make sure you'll NEVER be happy again, d'you understand?"
Too surprised to react, I watched her scamper out of the room. As soon as her tail whipped around the corner, I let out a deep, shaky sigh, curled around my knees and buried my face on my hands.
How on the was I supposed to 'set right again' which had already gone horribly wrong in the beginning?
It was only three hours later that I decided to return to my daily tasks, which, over having been rape-kissed by Allen, having broken Van's heart, having been scared to death by an aggressive feline and having wracked my thoughts to knots in search of a suitable solution, I had ended up neglecting badly.
The young boy who had been hurt during the fire attack on the Royal Palace was still lying in his bedroom in the hospital tract, waiting for me to resume his treatment. I apologized for my tardiness and concentrated on him. In order to be able to treat patients it was compulsory to lock away irrelevant or disturbing thoughts, which, concerning my recent adventures, I always had plenty of. Any distraction during the procedure was sure to produce complications which might at times cause serious damage to the patient.
After having dealt with by an experienced healer of Van's hospital staff, the child had finally woken up. The man had confirmed my original surmise that the kid had suffered a severe disappointment by someone he trusted, and I was immensely proud to have successfully managed to form a diagnosis which had finally turned out to be correct.
The one thing that was left to do was get the boy to trust us so far as to reveal the name of his attacker. As a result of the disappointment the child had suffered, his trust was not easily to be gained, of course. However, I had gladly taken over responsibility for the boy, thinking that my open personality would make things easier for him.
I entered the room, greeted the boy and knelt down by his side. He peered at me with wide eyes, and I gave him a tiny reassuring smile. We had made significant progress in the last days, proving that my capability to make people trust me had not diminished in any way over the last weeks. As a victim of the latest assault who might give valuable hints about the attackers no less, it had become my most pressing goal to get him to talk, and for today I hoped that he might finally tell me name as well as origin of his former companion who had tried to kill him.
I was hell-bent on finding out who had committed the assault and had thus tried to kill Van.
"Hey," I murmured softly, and "hey," was his faint answer. Our usual ritual was that I spoke first, telling him about my day and the people that I met, so this is what I did. Leaving out generous parts of the events concerning my love life, I told him about my friend Meruru whom I had finally met again and who had just given me the telling-off of my life.
An amused chuckle escaped his lips and elated about the positive turn the boy's health had finally completed, I offered to introduce this fabulous friend of mine to him. He agreed eagerly, and I asked the nurse to take Meruru to the hospital wing. Soon enough, her lithe body slid through the door with the usual grace which, as I thought, might delight my little patient even more.
"Look, "I beamed contentedly, "this is my friend ... huh?" A quick glance told me that something was not right.
As soon as my little patient had caught sight of his visitor, he paled visibly, his body becoming as stiff as a board. A tiny whimper escaped his pressed lips as he tried to hide behind me. Meruru, perceiving his obvious despair, threw me a quizzical glance and snuck out of the room again. She would be waiting for an explanation later, but right now I was glad that she was gone.
My first puzzlement about this unusual reaction quickly produced hectic activity. Closing my eyes, my mental fingers prodded his soul, detecting panic, hurt, disappointment and betrayal.
Someone had hurt him deeply ...
This someone can't possibly have been Meruru, as she had been staying in Astoria at the time, but ... it could have been someone who looked exactly like her ...
A neko ...
A member of the neko tribe had committed the assault ...
Man, how on Gaia was I supposed to tell Meruru ...?
Deep in thoughts I left the hospital tract. My excitement was such that I nearly barrelled over someone who crossed my path in the corridor. A quick look told me that it was Princess Stiliani whose troubled complexion told me that she, too, was not happy at all. Moist streaks covered her lovely face and her eyes were puffy.
At the sight of her downtrodden countenance, a sudden and strange feeling of sisterly solidarity and affection welled up in me and nearly caused me to hug her and repay the kind gesture she had once given me. However, she turned her head away and hastened off, dry sobs racking her supple form. The indignant thought that, as King Van's fiancée, she didn't have the right to be sad, shot through my mind, but I had more pressing matters to tend to, and the next moment I hurried off to look for someone to tell my recent discovery.
An hour later, the tide was high in the Council room.
„IMPOSSIBLE !!!"an enraged Meruru spat in my face. "It CAN'T have been someone from my family! Apart from the fact that Zaibach's regular POGROMS hve made sure that hardly anyone of my people survived, there simply is no REASON for any of us to assault Lord Van ... The neko have ALWAYS been loyal subjects to the Kingdom of Fanelia!"
As rationally as I could muster, I mentioned the boy's terrified reaction at her appearance for which no other explanation could be given, but was immediately rebuked by her.
"RUBBISH," she waved it all off, "he can have had MILLIONS of reasons for his behaviour. You are accusing a member of my tribe of TREACHERY, and have nothing else to offer than the lousy reaction of this little runt?!"
I was about to give her a heated return when suddenly one of Van's advisors piped up.
"Investigations amongst the boy's neighbours have revealed that one of his close friends used to be a young man of unknown origin. He was rumoured to be a member of the neko tribe, though he rarely showed his face to anyone. All of a sudden, he appeared out of nothing and, against the boy's parents' will, befriended their son and appeared to have imposed a ... doubtful ... influence on the child. The boy has been known to act strangely after hanging out with his friend. He was renitent and often possessed things which children his age would not be allowed to own, such as ..."
"GET STUFFED," Meruru's eyes were flashing dangerously, and the advisor gulped heavily. "Neko people used to have a poor reputation on this world for DECADES. Members of my tribe have always been PERSECUTED, oppressed and blamed for crimes none of them had committed. Nobody EVER did us justice, the sole exception being King Goau of Fanelia and his family who ADOPTED me after a mob had killed my parents. This is just another low and cowardy attempt to blame MY people for the assaults!"
Her face was heated, and she was just about to add another argument, as Van suddenly raised his hand. The room became quiet in seconds, all faces turned to him. I couldn't avoid an embarassed blush creeping over my features as his gaze flew over my face, since this was the first time that we met after he'd walked in on Allen and me. His face, however, remained neutral.
"Meruru," even his voice remained calm, "in order to confirm or refute the rumours, we will have to inquire amongst the neko themselves. You of all my counsellors will be best suited for the mission. I hereby appoint you Royal Coroner, giving you all necessary competences to execute a formal inquiry in the matter aforementioned. Travel to your tribe, take along all the personnel and means you deem necessary and find out whether these rumours were right or wrong. I expect you to be fair; you are sensible enough to do justice to the delicate matter and wil neither miss positive nor suppress negative evidence. I am counting on you ..." with a meaningful glance he added ... "... sister."
A long glance was exchanged between the rusty-furred neko woman and the King. Silent messages were dispatched to and fro the adopted siblings, discussions were made and points were got across. Finally, Meruru nodded, bowed stiffly and announced: "I will be off this evening." With an elegant movement she turned around and slid out of the door.
This was when I made my decision.
Before Van could even address me, I had quickly bowed and left the room as well. The cat woman was already miles away, but after a short run I managed to catch up with her and called her name. Her face fell as she saw me running towards her.
"Still there?" she snarled, "still more rumours to blame on my people?"
Silently I shook my head. "You know that I was far from blaming your tribe on purpose. All I wanted and still want is to find out the truth about who tried to kill Van. HE is where my first and foremost loyalties lie with. I though you would feel the same."
She didn't look away, and we traded glances. "I do," she said proudly. "I will lead the inquisition as thorough as possible, but I am convinced that the rumours will prove to be wrong."
Hand outstretched to her, I offered, "I will help you, if you let me." An incredulous look of hers forced me to elaborate.
"Look, I am sorry about the way things have turned out. I am sorry that my discovery had to lead to bad rumours. Where I come from, prosecutors have to ascertain both incriminating as well as exonerating circumstances. This is why I want to help you find out more. I have trained my mental powers, and your people maybe don't feel threatened by me, because I'm not Gaian, so hopefully I will be able to be of some help."
She narrowed her eyes, mistrust written over her features. I tried to keep my countenance as open and honest as possible, although I still hid an additional reason about why I wanted to accompany her.
With an exasperated sigh, the young feline gave way. "Fine. Whatever. Come with me," she muttered and dismissed me with a careless wave of her hand. Clearly I was not her favourite companion, but I was resolved on being useful.
"We are leaving tonight at eight. Be on time, because I won't wait for you. Have I made myself clear enough?" she added with a dour face.
"Yes," I nodded with an inner cheer. I was a genius! This way, I wouldn't have to watch Van being wooed by Stiliani. I would be able to avoid Allen. Plus, I might take the opportunity to get back into Meruru's good graces again. And if I was lucky, Stiliani would be gone the moment we returned from the neko ...
We set off punctually. I had decided to travel incognito, as I was sure that the Fanelian leader would not approve of my going with his adopted sister. This was why the moment the young King stepped out of the entrance door, I ducked and pulled a hood into my face.
Van's slim form stood on the Palace stairs, surrounded by heavily armed guards, and uneasiness seeped into my stomach. I wouldn't see him for weeks, maybe even months. I wouldn't be there to protect him in case someone attacked him again ...
However, with respect to what had happened between us, I was positive that neither of us would feel comfortable in each other's presence, so keeping a low profile for some time might be exactly what we both needed.
In a moment of last-minute nostalgia, I listened to Van's simple words of farewell. What surprised me was that the Princess of Derval was nowhere to be seen. Usually her weakness for her fiancé was sure to keep her close to him.
My musings were interrupted by some of the King's words.
"... will be accompanied by the Royal escort of Derval which will travel as far as the town of Amine with you. Under Her Royal Highness, the Princess Stiliani's, protection you will be enabled to travel more quickly and safely, and hopefully you will reach the forest of Adom in so much as two days. Take care, and farewell."
At these words, our group started to move. I was so confused that I had to remind myself to keep a strong grip on the reigns of my horse. Why on Earth did the Dervalian escort, why did the Princess, accompany us? Why did Stiliani leave Fanelia at all? From what I recollected, the duration of her stay had not been fixed beforehand, but on the other hand, Yone had not mentioned her leaving so soon either. I had been convinced that she'd stay for longer, maybe even until their wedding, so the sudden departure of the Princess caught me cold-handed.
For once I was worried about Van again. How would he be able to bear his fiancée's absence? The idea to go with Meruru didn't seem so appealing as it had in the morning, but our group had already left the Palace grounds. There was no way back.
With a determined gesture I looked ahead, where my path was leading towards Adom, towards the neko.
There was only one way I was following, and I was going to take it one step at a time.
to be continued ...
and now for something completely different (i don't own monty python ...), and as always, in the order of appearance (my, this is getting long ... help !!!):
Inda: er ... say, a monkey wrench is a tool, correct? i suppose you are alluding at the cliffie?! this must be an idiom i haven't known until now ...and it's always nice to learn something new! anyway, concerning van: no touchie hugs her van doll !! he's innocent. in this case he couldn't have done anything at all, as the unanimous vote of his council ...well, see last chapter. plus, he already told you that he suffers, didn't he? don't leave him! and ...by the way ... DON'T NAG! ;-)
escawing: so sorry ...is it really that emotional? now this might be something to tell my grandchildren one day ...ehehehe ...
Hearts of Eternity: nooooo, don't cry!!! it all has a solution you'll find out about later! anyway, i hope it's not a bad sign for a writer to get readers crying ...mind, you might be crying in the end as well ...but happy tears ! keep your chin up!
Little Witch: aieee! keep your fingers off stiliani !! i like her and wanted her to be a sort of eye-catcher. IF van HAD to marry a real princess, wouldn't it be nice to know that he was married to a pretty and clever girl instead of a pincer woman? she's really nice, believe me; if she existed, you'd like her, too. i just needed her to add some tension to the plot, and wasn't it you who didn't want van and hitomi to rush into a romance?!
Sesshyz Koishii: (i wonder whether sesshie'd ever call someone his 'koishii' ... ehehehe!) anyway, in case you got bad ideas: i've got an attack gecko!!!
Kyoko De Fanel: new pen name - you 'married'? congrats ;-) well, groveling ...she already did, kinda. i meant 'suffer' or 'being punished', and that she already did. as to van ...question already answered?
Aja: i wanted to introduce the engagement as a surprise! this was one of the first twists i thought of when i created the plot. actually i have read quite a lot of stories with such a complication (no surprise here, as royal marriages are often being arranged connections), but in most of them hitomi's rival is kind of evil or stupid or in love with someone else, and thus no real competition. i wanted stiliani to be a real threat, along the lines that readers kinda like her, too. it seems like i failed sigh
Jameth: wuahahahaha !!! stick with me, and you'll die of nervous breakdown !
kaede11: yeah, he gets to retaliate in a very effective way, doesn't he? they both don't really trust each other. their imperfections make them perfect for each other, don't you think?don't worry, he will suffer. they both will. that's what fanfics are about. anyway, hands off van!!!
akai chou: there it is ... once the olympics are over, i'll have to find something else to distract me off writing ...
Rogue Almighty: shit. how did you find out? yeah, my name's satan, beelzebub or devil, and i'm evil impersonnate. i never miss an opportunity to make people suffer ...but shhhhhh, don't tell anybody, right? as for the update time, i ... hang on, i need to watch the hockey final right now ...germany against netherlands ...i'll explain later ...wuahahaha!
Athanase: it might be better to keep your hankeys ready ...anyway, thanks for the flattering compliment. concerning me, this fic certainly IS powerful. it robs me off sleep, keeps me up late and distracts me at work ...oh, well ...
Nightheart: whow, what a review! thanks. i'll keep doing my best ...
Esca-lover: reviews like yours make me feel all warm and fuzzy ...thank you very much! especially the part about the language is what i consider extremely flattering. i am german; since i have only learned english at school for a couple of years, hearing from someone that grammar and word usage are fairly correct is something that makes me proud. i am also proud that you added this fic to your 'favourites'-list and even plan to recommend it. which author would be able to refuse an offer like that ...;-)
Tori-san: i'll do my very best ...can you hear the cog wheels in my mind rattling ?
Solo: WAR ?! nah, this is a peaceful story ... ;-) anyway, thanks a lot ...
Kintora: glad you liked it! mmmmh ...my 'author-power' is already happily thinking of new ways to torture them. maybe i should add them ... but then again, i might also write another fic after this one ... we'll see! don't worry, i will finish this one. i've already worked it out completely ... you will SO love it! wuahahaha!!!
