Chapter 7
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AN1: Thank you for those of you who are supporting me. Please leave a review. It would mean so much to me and show me that people are actually reading this.
June 9th 1976
It has been five months since Natasha and Tony started a snowball fight with their parents which ended with all four of having Jarvis fusing over them once he realised how long they have been out in the snow. One thing that has become clear since then is that Natasha is really letting herself open a little, it not much, but she is certainly more open around her family than she once was.
"Howard will you hurry up." Peggy calls from the bottom of the stairs where she is standing with Maria, and Daniel Sousa who is going to pretend to be her date for the event that they have to go to.
"I'm almost ready." Howard calls down.
"Almost is not good enough, we're already late, even by your standards. Lian and William, not to mention all our agents who are going, are already there." Peggy calls.
"I know, I know." Howard calls down.
"Mom, where are you going tonight?" Tony asks curious.
"We're going to an event with all different people who do the same job as we do." Peggy explains to her son.
"Is that why my parents are there too?" eight-year-old Melinda asks curious as her parents told her that she is staying at the Carter-Stark house for the night.
"Yeah, it is." Peggy confirms, "And while we're all gone the three of you are going to listen to Mr Jarvis and Ana. You are going to do everything they tell you to, okay?" Peggy asks, looking between Tony, Melinda and Natasha.
"Of course."
"Yep."
"Yes."
"Good." Peggy says and she turns back to the starks, "HOWARD." Peggy yells as Daniel and Maria exchange amused looks as they have both seen this exact situation play out more than once before.
"I'm right here." Howard says, walking down the stairs, wearing his best suit.
"Good, we should get going." Peggy responds.
"Have a good time tonight, Mr Carter, Mr Sousa, Miss Carter, Miss Carbonell." Jarvis greats.
"Well will." Howard answers.
"Make sure that they don't stay up to late." Peggy tells Jarvis.
"I won't." Jarvis promises as Peggy, Howard, Daniel and Maria leave, "So what would you like to do?" Jarvis asks Natasha, Tony and Melinda curious.
"How about some board games." Natasha suggests and Tony and Melinda nod.
"I'll go get Ana." Jarvis comments, no one knowing that within a couple of hours everything is going to be changed.
Twenty minutes after they leave the house Peggy, Howard, Daniel and Maria get close to the location where the event that they are going to is being heled, as they get close to the place they hear a noise and the car is rocked by a sensation all four of them are unfortunately all too familiar with, the feeling of an explosion.
Due to the force of the explosion Peggy briefly loses control of the car, but she is able to quickly able to get control back and as soon as she does she breaks and she puts the car into park and turns it off once it is stopped. Once the car is stopped Peggy, Howard, Maria and Daniel hurry out of the car and start to run towards the building, or Peggy, Howard and Maria do, Daniel moves as quickly as he can with his crutch.
Once they are close enough Peggy, Howard, Maria and Daniel see that the building is on fire and there are some people who are running out, trying to beat the flames, and Peggy goes to run in but Howard grabs hold of her the second she tries to.
"Let go of me Howard, I have to help." Peggy says angrily.
"You can't, Peg, not right now." Howard tells her, "If we go in there right now we'll just get killed trying." He reminds her.
"He's right, Peggy." Daniel says, "We need to help those who have already gotten out and wait until the flames die down."
"Right, yes." Peggy says and the four of them get started on helping whatever they can to help the people who have escaped.
Half an hour the area near the location where the even was meant to happen is covered by people from different federal agencies and emergency service personnel.
"Director Carter, Director Stark." The Director of the CIA, who has some minor injuries, greats as both Howard and Peggy finish helping some of the people, agents mainly, who were lucky enough to make it out of the explosion.
"Director Trickle." Peggy and Howard greats.
"The fire marshal said that the building is secure and the three of us along with the director of the FBI are going to be given access to the building in a few minutes." Director Trickle informs Peggy and Howard.
"Okay." Peggy says with a nod, "Director Trickle, Agent May and her husband, they were inside."
"I know, so were about a dozen of my agents, maybe more. How many of yours were?" Director Trickle asks interested.
"About as many. We've got one of our agents, who has called in back up, to figure out how many of our people we've lost." Howard explains, "I take it that you were inside when it happened." He says as the three of them head towards the doors.
"Just inside the door, what about the two of you?" Director Trickle asks.
"We were pulling up." Peggy explains.
"Guess your habit of being late came in handy for once." Director Trickle says to Howard as everyone in the intelligence community knows about Howard's habit of being late.
"Guess so." Howard responds as the three of them reach the doors where there is another man waiting.
"Director Trickle, Director Carter, Director Stark." The man greats.
"Director Kelley." The three of them great and not long after Peggy, Howard and Director Trickle arrive at the doors the fire marshal walks over.
"Are all four of you coming inside?" The Fire Marshal asks.
"We're the directors of the three biggest federal agencies and they were our people in there. We're going in." Director Trickle informs the fire marshal.
"I warn you now the sight isn't for the faint hearted." The Fire Marshal says, his eyes lingering on Peggy.
"I'll be fine." Peggy responds an anger to her voice.
"Very well, follow me." The Fire Marshal says and the four directors and the fire marshal head inside.
As soon as Peggy and Howard head inside they are both reminded of the war, of all the bodies they saw, all the bodies they caused, but they press on, both looking for their agents and their friends.
As they walk, among the bodies, there are some bodies that Peggy recognizes as her agents and every time she sees one she stops, squats down in front of them, not caring about the ash or blood she is getting on the dress she is wearing.
"I'm sorry." Peggy says to each one of her agents when she sees them, closing the eyes on those who's are open.
"Peg." Howard's voice says after she finds a fourth agent of hers. Turning towards the voice Peggy sees that Howard is near two bodies and as soon as she sees the look on his face Peggy knows exactly who the bodies belong to, but she gets up anyway and walks to Howard.
Just as she was expecting Peggy finds Howard squatting between the bodies of Lian and William May, both of whom are burned and bloody, but still recognizable.
"They deserved better." Howard says as Peggy squats down next to him.
"Yeah, they did." Peggy confirms and the two of them drift into silence, both of them thinking about the horror that is around them and what it means.
At about nine am the next morning, after spending all night trying to identify the dead bodies that they could and working with the other agency directors to figure out who was behind the bombing, Peggy and Howard arrive back home, both of them looking exhausted and covered in ash and the blood of others.
As they walk in Peggy and Howard are greeted by worried Jarvis.
"Miss Carter, Mr Stark." Jarvis greats, "I'm glad that you are both okay."
"Thanks Jarvis, but we just got lucky." Howard answers.
"How are Natasha, Tony and Melinda?" Peggy asks.
"They don't know what's going on. I did as you asked and kept them away from all TV's and radios. I told them that the two of you, Mr May, and Mrs May got called to work, and I've been doing my best to distract them." Jarvis explains, "I don't think that Mr Carter-Stark and Miss May have realised that that is what I am doing, but Miss Carter-Stark certainly has." Jarvis explains.
"Thank you Mr Jarvis." Peggy says gratefully, "Where are they?"
"Out in the pool. Ana is watching them." Jarvis explains, "But I recommend that you both get cleaned up before you talk to the children." He says as he is sure that if Melinda, Natasha and Tony, though more Tony and Melinda, were to see the state that Peggy and Howard are in then they would panic.
"Yeah, that might be best." Howard says and he and Peggy both head upstairs.
Twenty minutes later both Peggy and Howard are cleaned up a bit and are sitting by side on the edge of their bed, both trying to prepare themselves for the conversation that they know they have to go and have.
"Do you remember the promise we made Lian and William?" Peggy asks Howard.
"Of course." Howard answers without hesitation, "And I think we should keep it." Howard says, "She has no one else now." He says, knowing that both Lian and William have no family.
"But she does have us." Peggy responds, "We promised Lian and William that we would take Melinda in and treat her as if she was ours if something happened and that's what we've got to do."
"Yeah, it is." Howard confirms, "She's eight, how do we tell her that her parents are never coming home?"
"I don't know; I just think we have to tell her the truth." Peggy says.
"Together?" Howard asks.
"Together." Peggy confirms and the two of them get up, both knowing that they are going to break the heart of the eight-year-old girl downstairs.
A couple of minutes later Peggy and Howard walk out into the back where they find Natasha, Tony and Melinda happily playing in the pool together, as she sees them, because she knows what happened, Ana heads back inside.
"Mom, Dad." Tony says happily when he sees them, "Are you going to join us?" he asks curious.
"Not right now, Pal." Howard answers.
"Melinda can you get out for a minute, Howard and I need to talk to you." Peggy says and as she does she notices Natasha's eyes widen and Peggy knows that the teenager has realised what is going on.
"Okay." Melinda says confused before swimming to the ladder and climbing out of the pool. As she climbs out Peggy hands the young girl a towel and she and Howard lead Melinda over to the chairs not too far from the pool, but far enough away that Natasha and Tony won't be able to hear what they say.
"Tasha? What's going on?" Tony asks confused.
"Nothing good." Natasha answers, a sadness to her voice.
"What's going on? Where's my Mom and Dad?" Melinda asks Peggy and Howard, not being able to help but fear the worse.
"That's what we've got to talk to you about." Howard tell Melinda as the three of them sit down.
"I don't understand. Where are my parents?" Melinda asks, looking between Peggy and Howard.
"Something happened last night Sweetheart." Peggy says, trying to think of the most delicate way for her to say what she has to say, "There was an explosion at the event your parents were at."
"Are they okay?" Melinda asks, "What hospital are they at?" Melinda asks, trying to hold out hope that her parents are okay.
"They're not at a hospital." Howard answers.
"Your parents were killed, Melinda." Peggy tells her, "I'm so sorry."
"No! You're lying! They're not!" Melinda says, a look of heartbreak appearing on her face as tears come to her eyes.
"I'm sorry Melinda, but they are." Howard tells her.
"NO!" Melinda yells, "NO, NO, NO." Melinda yells and Peggy pulls Melinda into her arms, as she does Melinda continues to say, "No," over and over again as she lashes out against Peggy, hitting her though she's not really hurting her.
"I'm sorry, Melinda. I'm so sorry." Peggy says as the young girl breaks down in heartbreaking tears in Peggy's arms.
As Melinda breaks down in Peggy's arms Howard gets up and walks over to the pool where Tony and Natasha are near the edge, watching what is going on.
"Dad?" Tony asks confused.
"How about we head inside and I'll tell you everything." Howard tells Tony and Natasha.
"Okay." Tony says and he gets up and swims to the ladder, Natasha right behind him and as they both climb out Howard hands over towels and then the three of them head inside, Howard exchanging a look and nod with Peggy, who is still cradling a crying Melinda, as they do.
"Dad, what happened?" Tony asks as soon as he, Natasha and Howard are in the lounge room.
"You might want to sit down." Howard tells Natasha and Tony, both of whom sit down on the couch and Howard walks over and sits down on coffee table that is right in front of Tony and Natasha, "Last night your Mom, Maria, Daniel and I were almost at the location where the event we were going to was when we felt, and heard, an explosion. It came from the location where we were going. Melinda's parents were killed."
"Oh god." Tony says horrified, "Poor Melinda."
"Yeah." Howard says and his son hugs him.
"You and Mom were meant to be there, weren't you?" Tony asks as he holds his Dad tightly.
"Yeah, we were." Howard confirms.
"I'm glad you weren't." Tony tells his Dad.
"So am I." Howard respond as he and Tony break apart.
"What happens to Melinda now?" Natasha asks, not even being able to imagine how hard this is going to be on Melinda.
"A long time ago Peggy and I promised William and Lian that we would take in Melinda if anything happened to them. So, Melinda's going to live here with us now." Howard explains, "Is that okay with you two?" Howard asks, looking between Natasha and Tony.
"Of course." Natasha answers.
"Definitely. Having another sister would be great. Just try to make it a brother next time." Tony requests and as much as he loves Natasha and as good of a friend Melinda is he would like a brother.
"I'm not sure there will be a next time." Howard informs Tony, "And it might be a while before Melinda sees us as family." Howard explains to his son.
"I know." Tony says with a nod, "What can we do to help?" Tony asks, wanting to do something to help.
"I don't know if there is anything we can do, other than be there for her." Howard explains and Tony and Natasha nod.
Out in the back yard as she holds the crying girl in her arms, who cries are breaking her heart, Peggy knows, without a doubt that she would do almost anything to take away the girls pain.
For over an hour Peggy holds Melinda until her cries turn into slow sobs.
"What happens to me?" Melinda asks, "I don't have anyone." She says through her sobs.
"You have Howard and I." Peggy promises, "We promised your parents that we would look after you if something happened to them, and that's what we're going to do." Peggy explains, "We're not going to try and replace your parents, we can't, you'll never forget them. But you'll always have Howard and I now too as well as Tony and Tasha." Peggy reveals, "Okay?" she asks Melinda who nods and the two of them drift into silence.
"Can I see them?" Melinda asks, breaking the silence, "Can I see Mom and Dad?"
"I don't think it would be a good idea." Peggy tells Melinda.
"Why not? I want to say goodbye." Melinda tells Peggy.
"I know you do, but your parents were hurt badly in the explosion, you shouldn't see them like that." Peggy says, being pretty sure that it would just do more harm than good for Melinda to see them like that.
"I want to say goodbye to them." Melinda informs Peggy, "I need to." She explains and Peggy searches her brain for a way to explain what's going on in a way that Melinda would understand.
"If you see them now that's all you will remember; you should remember them how they were." Peggy tells Melinda.
"I don't care, I just want to see them, please Peggy." Melinda begs.
"I'll think about it." Peggy says, planning on talking to Howard, Jarvis and Ana too, as she wants their opinions, "I'm not making any promises because I really don't think it's a good idea."
"Please let me, I need to." Melinda requests.
"Ms Carter, Miss May, there's lunch in the dining room." Jarvis informs them as he has come outside.
"Thank you Mr Jarvis." Peggy says and Jarvis nods before heading back inside, "Do you think you could eat something?" she asks the young girl.
"I can try." Melinda answers.
"It would be good if you could." Peggy responds and she and Melinda head inside.
When Melinda and Peggy walk into the dining room Natasha, Tony, Howard Jarvis and Ana are already there.
"I'm sorry Melinda, really." Tony tells her as she sits down.
"Thank you." Melinda responds, not sure what to say and once she is sitting she hesitantly reaches out and grabs some food.
Once Peggy sees Melinda grab some food Peggy signals to Howard, Jarvis and Ana that she wants to talk to them and the three of them leave the room.
"How's she doing?" Howard asks when they are out of the room.
"About as well as can be expected." Peggy admits, "But she wants to see their bodies. She begged me to let her."
"What did you say?" Howard asks.
"I said no at first, but then she begged again and I said that I would think about it." Peggy explains, "I don't think it's a good idea, but Melinda seems desperate to see them." She explains.
"If you don't let her Miss May will likely always wonder what it could have been like to say goodbye to them one last time and she'll likely hold resentment that you didn't let her." Jarvis says.
"But if Melinda were too see them it would likely hurt her more." Ana says.
"That's what I'm afraid of." Peggy admits.
"When I saw them Lian and William's faces weren't hurt, yes they had blood and ash, but that's likely cleaned off by now. If the sheets cover everything but their faces, then Melinda can say her goodbyes without being traumatised too much." Howard suggests, as he can see it from both sides.
"That could work." Peggy realises, "But I feel like either option could hurt Melinda."
"Both could, but Miss May has just lost her parents, she's already hurt." Jarvis points out.
"Yes, she is." Peggy confirms, but even knowing that Peggy knows, without a doubt, that she doesn't want to add to Melinda's pain, "What do you think?" she asks Howard.
"I think we should let her say goodbye. Just think about all the people we wanted to say goodbye to but never got the chance to." Howard reminds Peggy.
"Okay, I'll make the call, but I think we should both be with her when she sees them." Peggy tells Howard.
"Yeah, we should." Howard confirms with a nod, knowing that he wouldn't want anyone, let alone an eight-year-old girl, to go through that alone.
An hour later Peggy, Howard and Melinda are at a secure morgue so that Melinda can say goodbye to her parents. Both Howard and Peggy are hesitant about the idea, but they also suspect that Melinda not getting a chance to say goodbye to her parents could cause more harm.
"You don't have to do this if you don't want to." Peggy tells Melinda as they are standing by the doors into the room where Melinda's parents are.
"No, I want to." Melinda assures her, "I just need a moment." Melinda says, taking a deep breath, "Okay. I'm ready."
"We'll be either side of you, the entire time." Howard assures Melinda.
"Thank you." Melinda says and together Peggy and Howard push open the doors and the three of them walk into the room where there are two tables with bodies on them. Walking in first Peggy walks over to the bodies and moves the sheets so that they aren't covering Lian and William's faces but are covering everything else. To Peggy's relief the person she spoke to did what she asked and cleaned off the blood and ash from Lian and Williams's faces.
"You can leave any time." Howard tells Melinda asks she stops a few steps into the room, "It doesn't matter if you change your mind."
"No, I need to do this." Melinda says as walks over to her parents' bodies. At first Melinda walks over to her mother's body and spends a couple of minutes looking at her as tears come to her eyes, then she looks over her father's bodies and her tears increase. As they do Melinda feels both Peggy and Howard put arms around her.
"This isn't fair." Melinda says in a quiet voice.
"No, it's not." Peggy tells her, "Death never is."
"I miss them so much already." Melinda tells Peggy and Howard.
"That never goes away, but one day you'll be able to think about them and it won't hurt so much." Howard tells Melinda, speaking for experience.
"I don't believe you." Melinda informs Howard, "I don't think it will ever stop hurting."
"It will eventually." Peggy assures her and the three of them drift into silence.
"I want to go; I don't want to see them anymore." Melinda says, wiping her eyes, and breaking the silence after a few minutes.
"Okay, we can go." Peggy tells Melinda and the three of them leave the morgue.
"We don't have to if you don't want to but Peggy and I were thinking that we could go back to your house on our way back so you can pick up some of your stuff." Howard tells Melinda.
"I'd like that." Melinda responds, "But how will we get inside?"
"I have a key." Peggy says, knowing that even if she didn't getting in wouldn't be a problem.
"Okay." Melinda responds and the three of them once more drift into silence as they walk down the corridor. Peggy and Howard exchanging looks as they do, both of them wondering if there is anything that they can do to help the young girl they now find in their care.
Twenty minutes later Melinda, Peggy and Howard arrive at the May house and they let themselves in.
"We can come back anytime, so you don't have to grab everything, just take anything you want or need." Peggy explains and Melinda nods and heads to her room.
"We'll wait out here." Howard tells Melinda.
"I'm going to go empty William and Lian's secret safe before anyone else can." Peggy informs Howard.
"Good call." Howard responds and Peggy heads out of the room.
As she enters her room Melinda realises that it feels so foreign to her, everything feels like it doesn't belong anymore, or maybe like she doesn't. Not letting herself dwell on that Melinda grabs a bag from under her bed and just starts to pack up the things she doesn't want to be without as well as some clothes.
After about ten minutes Melinda has put everything she wants to take with her, everything that means the most to her, into her bag, the last of which is a picture of her and her parents. Once she packs her bag Melinda picks it up and heads out of her room where Peggy and Howard are waiting.
"I'm ready to go." Melinda assures Peggy and Howard.
"Okay." Peggy says and the three of them leave. As she walks out of her house Melinda wonders what her life is going to be like now and how she is going to face what's to come without her parents.
