Howdy do, humans?

Me again. Ok, I don't want to sound self-asserting, but can someone please spread the word about my writing? I'm trying to get more readers. PamEargle and I can't be the only people who read producers fanfic. Thanks again! And PamEargle, thanks again for commenting! I appreciate your continued support. Now…let's get down to business! All I can say to you is that if you haven't read the last 2 chapters, this one won't make sense. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED! THINK BEFORE YOU CLICK! Happy reading!

Ullabloom

"Ulla, is that you?"

She stood there, in the doorway, her hand on her hip. Leo was convinced he was looking at a different person. One with chestnut-brown hair…in a beehive...with a faux leopard fur hat…and tanned skin, wearing a Chanel suit, nothing like the peplum dresses she usually wore. Ursula said nothing as she went to her desk and put her purse down. The purse was new, too. Faux leopard fur, matching her hat. Nothing like the tapestry pettipoint handbags she carried around. Visually, she was completely different. Leo wondered if she was still the same girl on the inside. "Ulla, why?" he asked. "This isn't you! I want the old you back…"

She no longer spoke with an accent. She turned to him. "Mr. Bloom," she said in her fake voice. "I can assure you that we have not known each other since you offered me this job. Who are you to tell me who I am? I appreciate the employment. Thank you very much."

"But, Ulla-"

"Ursula."

"This is an act! New clothes are fine, but you can't just go by a new name-"

"Thank you very much, Mr. Bloom!"Ulla yelled before she paused and cooled off. "And where should I say Mr. Bialystock is?"

"I'm here, darling!" Max said as he heard her voice. He came out of the bathroom in a suit. Had he been listening to them?

"Um…You look a little…different today…" he stammered, staring at her hair.

"I have no idea what you're talking about, Mr. Bialystock. I believe that I have always dressed in similar clothes."

"Uh-huh."

"And even if I didn't, it's nice to try new things.

"Am I the only one who thinks you sound different?"

Ulla didn't want to be asked again. Roger and Carmen almost reached her breaking point. "Look," she started. "I am FINE. Absolutely FINE! Do I need to reassure EVERYONE?!"

Max looked at her in surprise. What was going on? Max didn't know what to do with her. She must be doing it for some role… he thought. She would never act this way…not with us…it's not her…

Ulla's eyes widened and filled with tears. "Oh, God! Please forgive me, Mr. Bialystock! I—I had a rough day, yesterday! I just can't-I'm so sorry!"

"No, don't worry about it, honey! It's fine. We all have off days. Now, we have a lot of work to do today, so we need you to get a head-start on that paperwork."

She obeyed. The day progressed, and around 1:00 p. m. the office received a phone call from Roger's house. There was no caller ID, but in the background, there was the faint sound of the identifying notes of "I Feel Pretty"-it was the doorbell.

Ulla handed the phone to Leo. "It's for you." She said with obvious annoyance. Leo heard the voice of his little girl on the other end. "Daddy, what's going on? Mommy's dressing different, and talking…normal, and-"

Leo couldn't talk about the matter anymore. Clearly, there was nothing he could do. "Mia, I don't have the time. I'll talk to you when I get home."

"When are me and Mommy coming home? When, Daddy?"

Leo didn't answer. Ulla did for him. She snatched the phone away from him and talked to Mia. Leo listened to Ulla ranting, and Mia fighting back on the other end.

"What do you want now?"

"Mommy, make up with him!"

"No! Forget it! We are very busy today, and we do not need to be bothered by you."

Then they started talking in Swedish.

"Slyna!" yelled Mia

Ulla was shocked by her daughter's use of that word. "Vad sa du?"

"Du förstör mitt liv!"

"Käften!"

"Du kan inte tala om för mig vad jag ska göra!"

"Käften!"

"Du käften!"

"Jag hatar dig! Din lilla kärring! Lämna mig ifred! Adjö! Håll käft! ADJÖ! VAR TYST!"

She slammed down the receiver and turned to Leo. "Let's make sure you remember," she started (in English), "after what you did to me, we are never 'making up'!"

Now Max was trying to interfere. "What, exactly, did he do?"

"Not now, Max!" Ulla yelled.

"Fine…"

"How many other women have you done this to?"

"Ulla you don't understand! He-"

"Not now, Max!"

"I'm just trying to tell you-!"

"SHUT UP! Pay me less if you want Max, but I am leaving! Good day!"

"But Ulla, it's not his-"

"I said good day!" And with that, she was out of the office.

"Leo, I'm so sorry." Said Max. "I started this mess, and-"

Leo was enraged. "Yes! It's YOUR FAULT!"

Max tried to approach him. "Leo, I'm-"

"Get away from me! This is all your fault! YOUR FAULT MY WIFE THINKS I'M SOME LYING BASTARD! I'm going after her." He left the office, and got on a taxi to Roger's house. Max suddenly had an idea. A brilliant idea. He picked up the phone, and dialed Estonia Henderson's number.