Still Around
Chapter 7 When It Rains
A/N: For Bella. :)
Where to begin? There was so much to cover, and such a short amount of time.
"I-I don't even know where to start?" I said softly, staring down at the smooth, glazed wooden table.
"Why did you decide to leave?" So that was where he wanted to start.
"Well," I began. "I don't really think that I ever had much of a choice. There were legal matters that had been botched and he made the decision for me."
"You didn't leave because of botched legal matters, Sara." He was able to see right through me.
"Indeed." I replied crisply, as our drinks arrived. I took a sip of my tea before continuing.
"I couldn't stay, yet he gave me no time to say goodbye. I wanted to go back, Stefan. I really did. I just…" I couldn't bring myself to finish.
"So instead you decided to just pack up and leave." He couldn't even look at me.
"I was…dragged away. I wouldn't have stayed if…" I cut myself off.
"If what?" He finally turned to look at me.
"He chose them." I managed softly, staring down into my cup of tea.
He didn't answer me for a while. It felt like hours before he finally responded.
"What did you think he would do?"
"I-I don't know. I guess I sort of expected it to happen. I set myself up for failure." I didn't want to see the look in his eyes. I was positive that I could pinpoint the exact look of disappointment in his eyes without even looking at him. It was like no time had passed between us at all.
We sat in silence for some time, neither of us really knowing what to say.
"He misses you, you know. He always has."
I looked up, surprised. How was I supposed to respond to that?
"I'm sorry that I can't say the same." I lied.
"It could have worked out. You would have made it work. You would have found a way." This angered me.
"Things would most certainly have not worked out." I snapped. "I gave him the ultimatum for a reason. He made his choice. He wanted them, so I did what was necessary and made it easier for all of us by severing all ties as quickly as possible."
I realized that I was being cold, but he wanted the truth, didn't he?
His jaw tightened. "That wasn't the only way out, Sara. You had options."
"What would you know? You weren't there. You didn't see the fervor in his eyes. You didn't see how quickly he was willing to toss me aside and run to them." I could feel my eyes beginning to sting from the memory. "You didn't feel the pain of having a parent reject you."
"Maybe he wouldn't have 'rejected' you if you hadn't given him the ultimatum. I'm sure you were just trying to be dramatic, as usual. I know you, always wanting to shine like the little star that you are, but this…it isn't like you." His hand gently came to rest over my fingers. "So you've had a long time to cool off. We can deal with it. But where does that leave us?"
I barely heard his last sentence. My blood was boiling.
"First of all," I began, "I did give him the ultimatum. What's done is done. No if's, or maybe's about it. Secondly, no I was not being dramatic. And for your information, you don't know me. You haven't known me for a very long time, and frankly I wish it'd have been forever. I'm not that same bright-eyed, amateur thirteen year old that you used to know. Newsflash, I'm a freaking supernova and I shine brighter than the fucking sun, little star my ass." I was burning with rage. How dare he try to say that he knows me?
"Sara," He held up a hand quietly in an attempt to calm me.
"And last, but most certainly not least, I'm engaged." I held up my left hand where my ring sparkled brightly.
He grimaced, obviously not enjoying the reminder.
"Therefore," I continued, "there is no we, and there is no us. Any problem that Damon Salvatore should present I will deal with on my own. I don't need you." I flung his hand from mine as though it disgusted me and stormed away from the table.
"Sara, wait!" He tried to come after me.
"I bid you good day, sir." I glared back at him, seething as I strode toward the door.
I didn't let the hot, angry tears fall until I was half way down the street. My jumbled thoughts were interrupted by the sound of the phone ringing.
Griffin's picture popped up on the electronic screen. I pressed the button on my steering wheel to answer it.
"Hello?" I half sniffled, hoping he wouldn't catch on.
"Hey—wait, what's wrong?" His voice shifted from cheerful to concerned immediately.
"Allergies." I lied. "What's up?"
"We have to be at the school earlier to set up and make sure they didn't mess up the paperwork again. Do you want me to pick you up?" I could hear him walking across the hardwood floors in his apartment.
"Uhm," I bit my lip in thought. Did I really want him to do that? Did I really want him? I couldn't think straight. "Sure. Just give me an hour to get everything." I didn't want to give anyone any excuse to take me anywhere. Especially anyone with a Salvatore name.
"Okay, see you then." He agreed. "Love you."
I was so distracted that I could barely reply with an "I know."
I pulled into my parking spot and numbly moved up the stairs to my apartment. I sat on my bed for a while, staring blankly into my closet. I tried my best to fight off the long buried memories, but they came anyway.
Age 13
"Stefan, NOOOO!" I screamed as I ran through the rosebush maze in my grandparents' garden.
"Your attempt to evade me is futile. I can very easily hop the bushes to catch you." His voice taunted behind me. I could hear the grin in it.
"But Stefan, that's—cheating!" I was surprised to find that he had hopped over the bushes and was now right behind me.
"Gotcha!" He tackled me to the ground and began to tickle me mercilessly.
"Noooo!" I howled in protest, my fits of laughter cutting me off. "Stop!" I begged.
"If you can give me one very good reason, then I'll stop." He proposed.
"B-b-because I love you?" I tried to choke out.
It worked.
"What?" He paused, his green eyes shining in the overcast light of midday.
I took my chance while he was distracted to push him away and run up the stairs into the house.
"Hey! Wait for me!" He called after me.
"Catch me if you can!" I cried slipping through the French doors.
"You two better come inside. It looks like it's going to rain." My grandmother looked up from the newspaper she was reading at the kitchen counter.
"We'll stay in-side." Stefan's voice cracked as he stepped inside. "Hate it when that happens." He muttered to himself.
"Wouldn't you rather have a nice, deeper, mellow voice?" His mother took a sip of tea from her mug. "It'll have to crack to get there."
"I hate puberty." He grumbled.
"Tell me about it." I rolled my eyes.
"Go on, you poor, depressing teenagers. Get out of here." She shooed us away.
"We should make sure the shutters in the attic are shut before it starts to rain." Stefan suggested.
"Yes! I was going to send your father to do it, but you two can just go ahead." Grandmother called after us.
We trudged up the three flights of stairs to the attic and began to close the shutters and then the windows. The skies had darkened significantly in the last few minutes.
"I love the rain."I inhaled deeply the smell of the coming rain.
"The rain is okay." Stefan plopped himself onto the rug in between the two old couches.
We hung out up here often. There were old board games, family pictures, and all sorts of strange things stored in the attic. Plus it was insulated so it stayed cool in the summer and warm-ish in the winter.
I sat down cross-legged across from him.
"So?" I began.
"So," He repeated.
We sat in silence for a few moments. There was nothing like a calm silence with Stefan.
"Did you mean what you said before? Y'know…out there…" He trailed off quietly.
I thought for a moment. He wouldn't make eye contact with me.
"When I said that I love you?" My forehead creased nervously.
"Yeah," He almost whispered.
I bit my lip in thought. "Yes."
He locked eyes with me. "I love you, too." His hand cupped my cheek, his thumb running along my jawbone.
"I know." I replied. His eyes were so distracting, such a compelling mixture of gray and green all at once.
It happened so quickly. I barely felt his lips brush over mine, softly, tenderly. It was…magical, I suppose you could say.
But it was over just like that.
"Sara Rachel Salvatore! What the hell are you doing?" Came my father's roar from the doorway.
I hadn't even heard him come up the stairs.
"And you! She's your niece! This is COMPLETELY unacceptable!" I thought he was going to punch Stefan.
"Daddy it's not what you think it is." I moved to step in front of Stefan.
Stefan turned to look at me, his eyes hurt.
"Of course not, because there's NOTHING here. Everything is OVER." He grabbed my arm and began to pull me out of the room.
"Daddy," I begged. "Daddy, listen to me. It isn't anything. You don't have to worry."
"Just shut up." He growled as we hit the second floor, his speed only increasing as we descended.
"Damon, wait!" Stefan hurriedly tried to catch up.
"What is going on?" My grandmother appeared at the bottom of the stairs.
"Damon!" Stefan caught his shoulder.
"Don't touch me." He jerked away. "And stay away from her." He gestured at me.
"Wait!" My grandmother stepped in front of him. "What is going on? You're not allowed to leave until you tell me."
"Ask him." Damon sneered at Stefan. "They're engaging in incestual activities. He is to stay away from her at all times." He glared at Stefan now. His eyes were burning with anger.
"Damon, they're just kids. It's okay for them to be curious. And they're not even really related." She touched his shoulder. "Just calm down."
"I will not have you telling me how to parent my own child." Damon pulled away and began to drag me to the door.
"Damon!" She yelled after him, her face creasing with worry.
"I will do this on my own, mother!" He called back, his jaw tense.
I struggled to wrench myself from his iron grip, so instead I unzipped my jacket and left it in his hand.
"Stefan!" I ran forward immediately. His arms welcomed me, but not for long.
"Sara Rachel Salvatore, get your ass back here NOW!" Damon was infuriated now.
"No." I locked eyes with him.
"DO NOT DISOBEY ME!" He marched forward, pulling my arm as we went back to the door.
I managed to rip free again, but this time he grabbed my hair.
"Let her go!" Stefan's voice cracked again as he yelled at Damon.
"OWWWWW!" I howled as he dragged me down the front steps. "Daddy, it isn't anything. Why won't you listen to me?"
"Bull shit, Sara. He's your fucking UNCLE! What the HELL were you thinking?" He shoved me into the backseat of his car.
"What do you think is going on? It's not the kind of relationship you think it is, Dad. We're not doing anything." My eyes were stinging with tears.
"I've seen enough. I don't need this going any further. Heaven forbid something terrible happen. You're not to associate with him in any kind of romantic way."
My tears began to fall. "But Daddy!"
"Don't, Sara. Not now." He held up his hand telling me to stop. "I don't want to hear it."
"But Daddy, I love him. I love Stefan." I choked, tears running uncontrollably. "And you can't stop it." I met his eyes in the rearview mirror.
He slammed on the brakes.
"You WHAT?" He unbuckled his seatbelt and turned around to look at me face to face.
"I love him." I sniffled. "I love Stefan." I looked him in the eye, challenging him.
"Like hell you do." He snarled at me. "You are NEVER to see him again. Do you understand me?"
I didn't reply. I stared at him angrily, biting my tongue to keep from screaming.
"DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME, YOUNG LADY?" He growled, his eyes were fierce and menacing. I had never seen him like this before.
For the first time in my life I genuinely feared Damon Salvatore.
"Yes, sir." My lips barely moved.
"Good." He turned back into his seat. "End of discussion."
I bit my tongue the whole way home. Instead I glared at him, if I could have burned holes in the rearview mirror, I would have.
When he pulled into the garage, I took my chances and spoke again.
"It's HER, isn't it? She's filled your head with lies, hasn't she?"
Rose had gone and told him that she didn't like that Stefan and I spent so much time together. That it was unnatural for us to be so close. She planted the seeds of hatred into his mind.
"End of discussion, Sara." He growled at me, as he got off of the car.
"I hate you." I muttered quietly, walking behind him the whole way up to the apartment.
"You want to talk about something?" He asked, changing the subject. "You know that summer trip to California that you wanted? Now seems like the perfect time to take a vacation."
I glared at him. There was only one reason why I wanted to go to California. I just wanted to find out who my real parents were. He didn't know, and even if he did, he wouldn't tell me. I'd have to find it on my own.
"Fantastic." I replied sarcastically, slamming the door to my room behind me.
Present Day
"Hellooooooo, Sara? Anybody home?" A hand waved in front of my eyes. It took me a second to realize that it was Griffin.
"Griff," My head snapped toward him and I launched myself into his arms. I squeezed him tightly, trying to pull myself into the world that he represented. The world that I had chosen for myself.
"Are you okay? You've been acting kind of funny." He looked at me.
"Yeah, just…I missed you." I buried my nose into the base of his neck.
"You…missed me. Okay. That's why I told you we should just move in together. We're at each other's places all the time anyway.
"Yeah…sounds good." I nodded. I didn't want to deal with the real world right now. I just wanted Griffin.
I had made my choice when I accepted his proposal. I couldn't go back anymore.
The buzzing from my vibrating phone brought my attention to the nightstand where it was charging.
Stefan.
"Why is he calling you?" Griffin went to the phone.
I couldn't go back. I wouldn't go back.
But what if I needed to go back?
A/N: Meh. Kind of a cliffhanger? Questions, comments, protests in reviews please and thank you!
