A/N: Thanks to Amonraphoenix and Darkunderworld for beta-ing for me. You guys are amazing. And thanks to everyone who has read and reviewed thus far, your support keeps me writing.

Disclaimer: see chapter one


Michelangelo ran to the cabinet and grabbed the first aid kit. He dropped it to the floor as he ran to the bathtub and pulled Donatello out of the still steaming water. Michelangelo's fingers flew to Donatello's neck and he breathed out a sigh of relief when he felt a slow but steady pulse beneath his fingertips. The youngest opened the first aid kit and took out some bandages. His mind was going numb; he didn't know what to do. If he didn't stop the bleeding his brother was going to bleed to death in moments. Michelangelo looked down at the deep gashes in Donatello's wrists. They were vertical instead of horizontal; reaching from his wrist to almost his elbow.

Michelangelo packed some gauze into the gashes to try to help the blood to clot. When the gauze was soaked through, he packed more gauze on top of the bloody gauze. He did that until the gauze wasn't soaked through and the bleeding had slowed. Breathing heavily, Michelangelo packed a bit more gauze onto the gashes before he wrapped bandages around Donatello's forearms. When everything was finished, he allowed himself to fall to the floor; his body trembling uncontrollably.

"You're okay," Michelangelo said to himself and to Donatello. "You're okay. Everything's going to fine."

He vaguely heard the sound of the elevator doors opening and his name being called. Plastic bags were dropped and someone entered the bathroom a few minutes later.

"Mikey? Mikey!" Raphael called anxiously.

Michelangelo opened his eyes, but all he could see was a red and green blur. Raphael tapped Michelangelo's cheek to get him to focus.

"Mikey, say somethin'!" he ordered.

"How's Donny?" Michelangelo whispered.

Raphael looked over to where a blood covered Donatello was lying, his arms wrapped up in neat white bandages. Raphael leaned over and placed his fingers against Donatello's neck. He sighed in relief when he felt a steady pulse beat against his fingers.

"You did good, Mikey," Raphael said proudly. "You saved him. He's going to be okay."

Michelangelo smiled weakly and tried to make his body stop shaking. "That's good," he whispered.

Raphael could only watch as his baby brother passed out, no doubt from the shock of what had just happened. Raphael turned to face Donatello and he sighed again. He was going to have to do something drastic to make sure Donatello didn't try to harm himself again.


Donatello jerked awake to find himself in the infirmary. He went to move his arms, but quickly found them restrained by thick leather straps that were connected to the bed railings. Beneath the clasps, Donatello could see clean white bandages wrapped around his wrists and for a moment wondered why his wrists were wrapped up. Then he remembered taking the sharpest knife he could find and slicing open his wrists in the bathtub.

Donatello's head fell back against the pillow and he closed his eyes, wondering why his brothers insisted on letting him live in misery. His thoughts were broken when the infirmary door opened and a very worn out Raphael stepped into the room. Donatello swallowed hard when he saw the strained look on his brother's face. Raphael was only a mere twenty years old, but he looked so much older now.

Raphael's once vibrant amber eyes were now dull and cold, no longer holding the fire that used to make them blaze. The red masked brother walked up to the foot of Donatello's bed and gazed at his sibling with pity and sadness.

"Why, Donny?" Raphael whispered in a hoarse voice as if he hadn't spoken in a while. "First we lost Master Splinter, then Leo, and now we're losing you."

"Raph, I-" Donatello began.

"Don't you think we've lost enough of our family?" Raphael asked, his voice remaining quiet and calm.

Where was the hot-head I used to know? Donatello wondered before he looked away, not being able to hold his brother's miserable gaze.

"Do you know what this is doing to Mikey…to me?" Raphael continued. "It was bad enough that we all had to watch Sensei slowly pass away, but then we lost Leo only a month after his death-"

"So, you're finally blaming Leo's death on me, now. Is that it?" Donatello snapped, turning back to face his brother.

Tears began to burn Raphael's eyes and he tried extremely hard not to break down. "Don't put words in my mouth, Donny," the older of the two hissed. "I'm saying no such thing."

"Well, it sure sounds like it," Donatello replied harshly.

Not being able to fight it anymore, Raphael allowed the tears to fall. "No one blames you, Don for what happened," he whispered hoarsely. "So, why are you blaming yourself?"

Donatello looked away again. "Because it was my fault that Leo was killed. He stepped in front of the bomb to save me, and then I let him die. If I don't blame myself then who will?"

"Leo wouldn't blame you," Raphael answered. "Leo never blamed us for anything."

"Don't," Donatello said mournfully, closing his eyes tightly. "Please...just don't. I know that he blames me, that's why he's here," he whispered so softly that Raphael didn't hear his words.

He opened his eyes and stiffened when he saw the ghostly image of Leonardo standing in the corner of the room. Pure, raw terror gripped Donatello like a boa constrictor. The ghost never moved or said anything, just stood there, accusing him with his calm expression.

"Raph," Donatello whispered in fear. "Just let me go already."

"No, Donny," Raphael denied. "Not until you're better. I'm not taking the chance of you trying to kill yourself again."

Raphael turned and headed for the door. Donatello began to fight against the restraints.

"Raph, please," he begged. "You have to let me go."

Raphael opened the door and disappeared outside, closing the door behind him. Donatello looked from the door to the ghostly image of his brother. Raphael headed for the couch and sat down as Donatello's screams began to fill the lair.

"Raphael! Let me go! Raphael!"

Raphael put a hand over his eyes and broke down into uncontrollable sobs as he listened to his brother's anguished cries.

"Raphael, please," Donatello beseeched.

At that moment, Michelangelo walked out of his room and slowly made his way downstairs. He went over to the couch and looked from Raphael to the closed infirmary door where he could hear Donatello's cries for help.

"Aren't you going to do something?" Michelangelo asked.

Raphael wiped the tears from his eyes and took a deep, calming breath. "No," he replied.

"Donny's in agony in there," Michelangelo said.

"Raph!" Donatello cried. "Raphie, please! Let me go!"

Tears began to well up in Michelangelo's eyes. It broke Raphael's heart, but he remained where he was.

"This isn't what Leo would do," Michelangelo pointed out.

"Well, in case you haven't noticed, I'm not Leo," Raphael snapped. "Donny needs to face his demons on his own."

"Leo would try to help," Michelangelo said.

"I'm not Leo!" Raphael snarled. "He's gone. We're all that's left. I'm not even sure Donny can be saved, anymore."

"No one is beyond saving," Michelangelo whispered.

"Donny is," Raphael replied softly. "He proved that when he tried to commit suicide."

Michelangelo shook his head. "No, you're wrong," he denied. "You just said we're all that's left. Brothers don't give up on one another."

Raphael looked up at his baby brother. "Then tell me what to do," he whispered in anguish. "I'm barely keeping myself together, let alone you and Donny."

"Donny has to get better. He has to," Michelangelo said. "I can't lose another brother."

"He's tried to commit suicide twice now, Mike," Raphael pointed out.

"He won't try again. He knows we'll just keep fighting to get him back," Michelangelo replied determinedly.

Raphael looked down at the floor. "I hope you're right, Mikey," he whispered. "Because if not...third time's always the charm."


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