Hey, y'all! Welcome back for chapter seven! Thanks to everyone who reviewed/favorited/followed this story. Sorry for any typos- I do my best to catch them all, but nobody's perfect... So, feedback is greatly appreciated, check out the poll on my profile, and tell me if you think I should hint at Lupin/Tonks. I value every opinion! ;)

Also, if you have read the Percy Jackson series and ship Solangelo half as passionately as my awesome twin sister, WhatComesFromWithin, then check out her story- Just Because You Feel It Doesn't Mean It's There.

Enjoy!

Chapter 7

Remus' toes curled as he slept on the old, worn-out mattress in his little hideout. He had washed most of his clothing in the lake nearby, and it was currently hanging in the kitchen drying. He had literally been in the same clothes for twelve years- and, as a werewolf, he hadn't been able to stand the smell of himself any longer. He had no idea how Tonks had been able to stand so close to him without gagging.

He stood up, and searched around in closets for any spare robes that may have been left behind- if his father had left the furniture, he might have left something Remus could wear. Finally, he found a worn green shirt of his father's that wasn't too moth-eaten. Remus tugged it on, and it hung awkwardly on his skeletal frame. It was too tight across his shoulders, but it was too large everywhere else. He sighed, knowing that before his Azkaban days, this shirt would have fit a lot better.

After a little more searching, he managed to find a pair of his old jeans, which ended above his ankles, and a set of blue dress robes that he had grown out of in 5th year. They fit better than the set from his 7th year did. He knew that the clothes didn't exactly work together, something that would have bothered him twelve years ago. But being in something clean, that didn't smell like death, was so relieving that Remus didn't much care if the colors didn't match.

Remus walked, barefoot, around the house, limping heavily. During one of his transformations in Azkaban, he had nearly ripped off his leg at the knee, and the cramped quarters hadn't allowed it to heal properly. Remus was used to the ever-present throbs of pain, but walking on it, after over a decade of leaning against cell walls, made him feel as though someone was sticking a red-hot poker through his knee. He knew that it really was bad, and that leaving it untreated now that it was back in use was a terrible idea, but Remus had few options. His muscles were weak from disuse, and as he struggled up the stairs, he panted, his stamina reduced to next-to-nothing.

Remus entered his old bedroom, leaning against the doorframe. He looked around at the blue walls, which had been painted when he was eleven. Much like he knew Sirius had when he was a teenager, Remus had plastered the area around the headboard of his bed with photographs. He doubted, however, that he had as many as Sirius did. He smiled softly, approaching one of his favorite photographs. In it, he and Sirius were laughing heartily as James was red in the face and apologizing profusely to an angry Lily Evans, whom he had just spilled his tea on. Peter was not in it- he had been holding the camera- and Remus liked it all the more for this reason.

Remus gazed at it intently, happily recalling that day. James had seemed like such an idiot at the time- pining after a woman who so obviously hating him, making a fool of himself in his quest for her love. It was that day, when James was too mortified to act like a git, that Lily realized he truly did like her, and wouldn't get bored with her after a date or two- that it wasn't about the adventure of getting her to say yes. Sirius and Remus had both thought it ridiculous that James hadn't given up on her- but look where it had gotten him- happily married, with a brilliant son... and dead.

Remus put the photo down sadly. No matter which memory he examined, anything having to do with Lily, James, Sirius, or Peter- which was most of them- always brought him back to his harsh reality. A reality filled with screams and betrayals, of heartache and misery. Of Azkaban and hatred.

Suddenly, Remus heard a crash, and heard someone utter a curse. He hobbled to the top of the stairs, his heart in his mouth. Who was it? The Aurors? Or-

"Wotcher, Remus! Where are you?"

He breathed a sigh of relief. Tonks.

"Up here," he croaked down to her. "I'm coming down; my knee's busted, it may take a minute..."

As he was awkwardly started down the stairwell, Tonks appeared at the bottom. She blinked. Bit her lip. Remus was concentrating on bringing his bad leg down to the next step, however, and didn't notice. He was gripping the banister so hard, his knuckles were white. "Do- do you need help?" she asked tentatively.

Remus glanced at her. While his pride was screaming that no, he did not need help, he knee was telling him to say yes already and sit down.

Finally, Remus looked at her and said. "I can do it on my own. You're only helping to make it go a bit faster."

Tonks grinned at him knowingly, but didn't say anything, for which Remus was grateful. She climbed up the stairs and grabbed his bone-thin arm, draping it over her shoulders. She helped him down the stairs. Though his breathing was still labored from the effort, the tightness in his chest eased. Tonks helped him into the kitchen, and he sat down heavily, sighing in relief.

He looked at her a bit sheepishly. "Thank you."

Tonks patted his shoulder. "Of course."

"What was that crash?" Remus asked curiously.

Tonks went a bit pink. "I- erm- knocked over the umbrella stand."

Remus couldn't help it. He laughed. He knew it really wasn't that funny, but it was the most hilarious thing he had heard in over a decade, and so normal. He laughed and laughed, and it was the first time he had done so since he was twenty-one.

Tonks looked surprised, but then began to grin. "It really wasn't that funny."

This just made Remus laugh harder. "Yes- yes it was."

When he finally composed himself, Remus asked, "What brings you here, Tonks? I wasn't expecting you back so soon."

Tonks retrieved a bag she had set aside. "I brought supplies," she announced. "I also brought news, but that can wait a minute."

Remus took the bag and peered curiously inside. He grinned. Soap. And a toothbrush and toothpaste, and- Merlin, was that a comb?

Remus glanced up at her gratefully. "Thank you."

Tonks grinned. "Well, if you're going to shake off those bad memories, you should start with dressing like a free man. The whole 'fugitive' thing doesn't work for you."

Remus chuckled. "I quite agree."

Tonks began to unload the bag. "I bought clothes- I guessed at the sizes, sorry if they're wrong- and I got a razor to fix that sad excuse for a beard, and scissors to handle your hair- let's get started."

Remus blinked. "What, now?"

Tonks rolled her eyes. "Yes, now." She headed towards the door. "Shower, bathe, whatever- then get dressed. I'll check out the town, then come back in an hour and a half- be ready by then."

She shut the door behind her before he could respond. An hour and a half. That was plenty of time. He gathered up the supplies, and headed towards the well in the backyard. The house didn't have running water.

Oh, Remus was ready for a change.


When Tonks came back, Remus was sitting at the kitchen table, scissors in hand. He was wearing jeans- which fit much better than the other pair- and a red and black flannel shirt. His feet were still bare, but he didn't much care.

Tonks plucked the scissors from his hand. "I'll take those. How short do you want it to be?"

Remus scratched his freshly-shaven cheek. When he was younger, it always hung on the longer side, usually around his ears. It had never been as long as Sirius' (thank goodness) before he had been to Azkaban. Remus tugged on his too-long hair. He took a picture of himself and Sirius at age twenty. He liked to have a picture of his friends on him at all times- they reminded him of the "golden days". In this particular picture, he and Sirius were heading back to the flat they had shared after a tiring night of babysitting Harry- James had snapped the picture while they weren't looking. In it, Sirius was turning around to glare at James, while Remus turned to face him and laugh. It was a good memory. "Like this, I think." Remus answered in his quiet voice, handing Tonks the photo.

Tonks nodded. "Sorry if it's uneven. I'm not very good at this sort of thing."

Remus began to smile. "I don't mind. Besides, I'm sure James and Sirius gave me worse haircuts in our schooldays- pranks gone wrong, and potions exploding."

Tonks laughed. "Well, then. Here goes nothing."


Remus repeatedly ran his fingers through his newly-cut hair, gladly welcoming back the familiarity, as he had never gotten used to his long hair in Azkaban. He felt like a new man. No- he felt like himself again.

Tonks finished sweeping the severed locks out the door. "Well, then. Ready for the news I brought?"

He nodded, smiling kindly at her. She began. "I went to see Sirius-"

Remus panicked. "What? But he- he hates-"

"I didn't tell him I knew where you were- but we looked at your file together. I'm not sure why he had it, exactly, but I think some part of him at least wants to believe you're innocent. The two of us agreed to search Hogwarts for that rat- Sirius in his Animagus form, me as an undercover student- and we'll try to force the rat out of his Animagus form. Then we'll Veritaserum him, and you'll be a free man once more."

Remus blinked, slowly. "I don't care about being free. I just want Harry to be safe. If it's not enough evidence, or Cornelius refuses to see reason, the both of you must understand: I am prepared to die in that prison. I will be satisfied once Peter is locked away from Harry- I need nothing more."

Tonks looked at him carefully. "But you want to be free."

"People want many things, Nymphadora." She glared at him. "But we almost never need even half of the things we long for."

Tonks bit her lip. "But you deserve to be free. You never deserved this!"

Amber eyes met dark blue. "Perhaps not. But perhaps I was the person strong enough to live through it and still bring Peter to justice. Or perhaps I just had the least to lose. Whatever the reason, whether I deserved this or not will not help me now. We must all make do with the cards fate deals us. I was just dealt a worse hand than most."

Tonks was silent for a long time. Finally, she whispered, "I understand. Just-" she took a deep breath. "Just because you don't need something doesn't mean it's wrong to long for it."

With those words she left, and Remus wondered if she knew exactly how long they would echo in his head.

A/N: Hey, y'all. Sorry for the wait- and the sad chapter. I know not a lot happened, but I have a mild case of writer's block, and school's been a killer... Hopefully you all have been having a better week. So, hope you enjoyed, leave a review, and let's all hope my creative juices get flowing soon.