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and for the GUESTS if you review and ask me a question, I can't answer you...
but no there is no set schedule for posts... I write this alongside my other writing as a fun exercise... so I will try to keep it up, but I have deadlines that I'm working with... so I'll do my best... but really reviews make it easier to get jazzed on a story :D
Chapter Seven
Kelly heard her words and ached for her. "Stella?"
He heard her ragged breath.
"Stella? Look at me."
When she looked up Kelly closed his hand over hers where it touched his cheek.
"Baby, I need you to know that nothing is going to change how I feel about you." He leaned into her palm. "I love you, Stella. God, I love you so damn much I felt like I was going to break when I couldn't find you."
"But Dr. Charles told you. He said he was going to tell you what happened to me. You know that they… what they did to me."
He squeezed his eyes shut and fought back the tears, not for himself. She didn't need to see how much this was tearing him apart.
"What they did, they're gonna pay for, Stella, but it doesn't change things between us. It doesn't."
"Kelly?"
He heard the confusion in her voice, saw the furrow in her brow even with the low light from the panel above the bed. "Yeah?"
"You said," her voice trembled, "you said you love me."
Guilt sank like a rock in his middle. Why had he waited so damn long?
"Yeah," he met her eyes and brought her hand to his lips and kissed her fingers. "I love you, Stella. I can't stand to see you in pain."
She almost laughed. "You know I love you, right?"
The look in her eyes and the hopeful sound in her voice was like a one-two punch to his gut.
"I love you, Kelly. I've said it a million times in my head, but I couldn't tell you before… or maybe that it's that I wouldn't tell you. I didn't want to be… clingy… or whatever, but after what happened," she swallowed and he could barely hear the sound even though he saw the effort it took, "I needed you to know how I felt."
"Baby, can I hold you?"
He saw her hesitate.
"If it hurts too much, that's okay. I just want to feel like I can hold you close… to protect you now, even though I couldn't before."
Her eyes killed him. Normally full of laughter or mischief, they were dull and clouded with pain.
But before his thoughts could be swallowed up with rage or despair, she saved him yet again.
"I want you to hold me, Kelly. I need to have you close."
Together, they managed to scoot Stella over to one side of the hospital bed and then Kelly took off his boots and his jacket and climbed up beside her.
He let her nudge him into place, his gaze watching her face closely for sighs of pain or stress. But with her attention focused on getting him 'just right' on the bed, the tension in her shoulders seemed to ease and the draw look of her features softened and turned tender under his watchful gaze.
Kelly didn't question when she left her pillow trapped under his shoulder, he just opened his arms and let her move in against him. She fit her shoulder under his arm and stretched out her body alongside his. And finally, he felt his heart throb painfully in his chest as she laid her head on his shoulder and draped her top arm over his waist.
She hummed as she snuggled closer, the sound vibrating through his t-shirt and into his skin.
"Are you hurting?" He had to know. Wanted to shield her from anything he could. "Stella, you have to tell me if I'm hurting you."
"Shhh…" she rubbed her palm lightly up and down his back, soothing him. "I just want to hold you, Kelly. I want to know that I'm still alive and that everything is going to be okay."
"Babe, please-"
"I just want to listen to your heartbeat, Sev, please. I want to sleep, but every time I close my eyes…"
He heard the unspoken truth in her words. She couldn't sleep because every time she tried, she was right back where she was.
"I'm here, Stella. I'm not going to let them hurt you anymore. Get some sleep and let me hold you, so I can know that you're safe… and here with me."
He knew he couldn't touch her back, April had already told him she had bruises up and down her back. But he could put his hand on her hip, his palm gently cupping the swell of her thigh at the top of her leg.
She looked like she was fighting sleep at first, her eyelids started to close but would flutter open as if she was afraid of the dark and trying to keep her eyes on the light.
"Go ahead, Stella, close your eyes… I'm here."
She nodded, slowly, her cheek rubbing against his chest, her arm bringing them closer together.
"I'm here."
Stella drew in a breath and let it out, the warmth working its way through his shirt and fanning out over his skin. "With me," she sighed.
"Yeah, babe. I'm here with you… and that's where I'm going to stay."
He felt her cheek tremble against him. "Kelly, I'm- I'm so sorry."
"Hey, hey," he lifted his hand and touched his knuckle just under her chin, lifting her face so that she could see his eyes, "you do not have anything to be sorry for. You concentrate on healing up so I can get you home and spoil you rotten."
"Spoil me, huh?"
He felt her relax a little, melting against his harder frame. "That's my plan."
"I might want you waiting on me, hand and foot."
Her eyelids looked heavier, sliding closed by fractions of an inch at a time.
"I think could do that, Stella."
"Really?" There was almost laughter in her voice. "I think I'd like the bragging rights on that." Her lips parted on a yawn before she snuggled even closer. "Imagine all the women in the world jealous like hell of me. Because I have you."
"And because I have you, I don't mind doing whatever it takes to make you feel safe. And loved."
Her hum rolled through his body and he felt her lips pressed against the shirt just beneath his collar bone. "I did," she mumbled, barely audible to his ears, "I felt loved, even before you told me… just like I love you, Sev…"
And then she was out, fast asleep.
And that's when he let the tears fall.
***In a bar across town***
Tim Caldwell walked out of the john and moved back to his table. The other three men holding down the high-top barely met his eyes and they certainly weren't trying to make contact with any of the other patrons in the bar.
"Salvado from Third Shift said that Severide stopped by the house, looking for answers." Kellen's voice was tense with worry.
Vincent shook his head. "I doubt he got any."
"Did Salvado say anything about how he looked?" Cooper Parsons stared down into his beer. "Did it look like he knew?"
"Knew what, asshat?" Caldwell hissed at his friend. "You think that bitch said anything about us?"
"If they figure out it's us," Vincent looked green at the gills, "that's the end of our careers."
"Whatever," Caldwell shot back, "you think I'd be that stupid? To risk my career over a piece of ass? You've got me confused with one of those pussies at 51."
Cooper glared at him. "Keep your voice down."
Caldwell shrugged. "No one here cares about them. I know I don't. Keep your shit together."
Vincent shook his head. "Look. Boss got us all riled up. He's the one that wound you up and put the target on her back-"
"And you're sure he's got our backs?"
Caldwell swore under his breath. "What the hell, Kellen? What's your problem? You turning in your balls and going soft? You know that's not what he wants. He wound us up, sure, but he made it clear. No regrets. CFD may think having women on crew is a good thing. But all they're doing is looking to pull us down. Distract us from the work. Keep us from getting what's coming to us. We made his point so he's going to protect us just like he always has. So keep it together or get the hell out of Dodge."
The three other men didn't have the same reaction to his words, but none of them spoke up any more. They sat quietly, sulking in silence as they drained every drop from their glasses.
