I woke up with the taste of dirt and ash in my mouth.
Every muscle in my body screamed out in pain; it felt like I had been run over, or had just been on the receiving end of an incredibly thorough ass-kicking.
A groan escaped my lips as I feebly tried to push myself off the ground, but my arms failed me, throbbing in protest.
I lay there on the ground, panting just from the effort required to do that much. Damn, what the hell happened to me? Last thing I remember I was in the room with the gold, and…
My thoughts were interrupted when a pair of strong hands wrapped around my waist and pulled me up, helping me to my feet and supporting me as my legs wobbled beneath me. I turned to thank my benefactor, but my voice caught in my throat as I saw that it was Battler.
That's right… The last thing I remember was Battler announcing that he was the culprit. Or the accomplice, but is that really such a fine line? He apparently had known the whole time, been a part of it from the beginning. All that talk about solving the mystery; was it just a sick game?
I almost wanted to recoil from him, to push him away, but I knew I'd just fall back to the ground stupidly so I allowed him to help me. Together we walked a few steps forward, and he set me down on what was apparently a bench. Haruhi was already there waiting for me, looking just as torn and beat up as I felt.
Battler just stood in front of the both of us and nobody said anything, so I took the chance to rest and get a better grip of my surroundings. We were in some kind of garden. It resembled the garden of the mansion, but only if you took it and put it into some twisted nightmare world.
Golden butterflies danced lazily through the hedges, their soft light illuminating strange and fantastic flowers of every color imaginable. The sky was dark, a deep pitch black, coupled with a mess of swirling dark clouds. I could vaguely see the silhouette of the mansion in the distance, but it seemed to twist and deform every time I tried to focus on one part or another.
"Where… are we?"
It was really the best question to ask. My voice sounded muffled, as if speaking on a quiet, snow covered night. The air in this place felt strangely heavy, like a deep fog, but there wasn't any noticeable humidity.
"Welcome to the Golden Land."
Okay, you said "Golden Land" a few times before, but what exactly does that mean? Battler shrugged before explaining.
"It could be considered a lot of things, really. The afterlife. Heaven. Hell. Purgatory. The end of the game. The underside of the chessboard. It's not really what it is that's important; it's who you can find here."
"The afterlife? Are you saying we're dead?"
Haruhi asked the question that was also on my mind. I certainly felt like I had died, or at least come very close to death.
"Death doesn't have the same meaning here. We live, we die and come to the Golden Land, and then the game resets and we start all over. Over and over. If I could escape this hell just by dying, it would've happened a long time ago."
Ignoring the morbid part there, what exactly do you mean by game? Why are you so much more familiar with this? What was the point of lying to us this whole time?
"I'm sorry, okay? It was all necessary, I swear. Well, most of it anyways. I kind of didn't think you were real at first so I was being a bit of a dick and I'm sorry for that too, but at least everything that's happened so far this game has all been for a good reason."
Battler kept rambling, and none of this was making any sense. So what, you're just insane? Sorry, but if there's a point, you'd better get to it soon. Battler stopped at my comment and sighed, shaking his head before continuing.
"I… Look, this is hard to explain. We're… all of us – We're just pieces. Like pieces on a chessboard. This whole thing, all of it. The murders, the island, the time loops: It's all just a sick game for the amusement of a higher power."
I… what? You can't be serious. I'm not one to take solipsistic mutterings seriously. If you want me to believe this is some crazy brain in a vat experiment than show me some proof.
…
Although, judging by these fantastical surroundings, I don't have much ground for skepticism.
"Proof? Hah. Do you want me to say it in red? Or better yet, why don't we go meet the Gamemasters? They're right over in the chapel. Throwing a party to celebrate their victory over you."
That still doesn't make any sense. I followed Battler's wild gesticulating anyway and saw the chapel. It looked different; grander and more magnificent, almost like a cathedral. There was a sort of warm light coming from it, and now that I was paying attention I could hear the faint murmur of a crowd – Like a party.
"Tell me! Why we should believe anything you say at all? Just what was the point of messing me and Kyon this entire time?"
Haruhi's voice was bitter and angry. I stood up slowly, using the bench for support. My legs were still stiff and sore beneath me, but getting back on my feet for a bit will probably help more than just sitting there.
"Why should you believe me? I don't know. I have a plan, that's all. I think it can get us out of here; for real. Out of the game board itself and into the real world. If it works, I'm sure you'll thank me later. If not, than whatever. I've already done plenty of things to deserve a spot in the lowest rung of hell. What's one more?"
I helped Haruhi to her feet, and we stood facing Battler together. He sounded desperate and manic. I'm reminded of conspiracy theorists; the ones who absolutely need for you to see the real truth behind something, and are tragically crushed by your inability to grasp the obvious.
"Look, the lying part: I've been waiting years for a chance like this to come around. Playing a game under the nose of the Gamemaster is very tricky business. I couldn't have told you anything, not without them finding out. You don't have to believe me I guess. Just… stick with me a little bit longer. There's one last thing I have to do. Besides, there's nowhere else for you to go here."
I'm still not quite sure I understand, but that last part unfortunately makes sense. This garden is shrouded with a mysterious darkness, and I'm not particularly sure I want to go exploring at random. It would be possible to just sit here and wait, I suppose, but wait for what?
Taking our silence as a sort of affirmation, Battler started walking in the direction of the chapel. I turned to Haruhi – She looked just as apprehensive as I felt, but I guess there really isn't much else of a choice? We shared a nod of silent agreement and followed after him slowly, supporting each other.
Nobody said anything as we followed the twisting path through the garden. The golden glow of the butterflies cast eerie and distorted shadows over everything, contrasting what would otherwise be bright and cheerful under normal lighting.
Finally, the chapel stood looming before us. There was a girl there, guarding a pair of massive double doors that stretched up into the sky. I had the oddly brief thought that doors like that would be incredibly impractical in real life.
"Yo, Dlanor. Long time no see."
Battler called out to the girl with familiarity as we approached. She was short, of an indeterminate age, and wearing an odd blue outfit with a massive gauntlet covering her left arm. She stared with cold, golden eyes as we approached before replying in monotone.
"Mister BATTLER. It is good to see YOU. I'm sorry, but you are not a welcome GUEST. Your name is not on the LIST."
She certainly has an odd method of speaking. Dlanor, was it? Don't tell me we've come this far only to get stopped by a bouncer.
"Hey, don't be like that. I'm sure my invitation just got lost in the mail. Come on, what's a little party crashing between friends? I've got unfinished business with the hostesses."
"NO. You cannot enter without an INVITATION. It is my duty as the door GUARD. I will not let anyone else PASS."
"Just the door guard, huh? They bring you all the way out here just to wait outside without enjoying yourself? You sure are moving up in the world, Miss Dlanor A. Knox."
Battler and Dlanor stared at each other, a strained tension filling the air. Her previously neutral expression had shifted to a sadistic, catlike grin; made all the more disturbing by her continuing monotone. This looks like it could get ugly fast. Hey, what about us? Do Haruhi and I have invitations?
"…"
Dlanor froze, breaking off her confrontation with Battler and turning to stare at us. After looking us over for a few moments, she pulled out a pair of reading glasses and a chart, peering down at a long list of names.
"I SEE. You two are free to ENTER. You are the guests of HONOR. Please PROCEED. You may bring one other with you, if you WISH."
Guests of honor? I'm not sure if I like the sound of that. At least that problem is solved. Dlanor turned and moved to the doors, preparing to push them open before turning back to address us.
"Mister BATTLER. Please be CAREFUL. Lady Bernkastel and Lady Lambdadelta are not playing by the RULES. [Red] Knox's 8th: It is forbidden for the case to be resolved with clues that are not PRESENTED. [Red]"
"I know, but thanks, Dlanor. Don't worry, I've got a plan."
I'm not entirely sure what that meant, but what's the surprise there? Whatever craziness is going on right now, it looks like Haruhi and I are just along for the ride. Her cryptic warning finished, Dlanor pushed the massive doors open, light and music flooding out to greet us.
…
Well, that's not what I was expecting.
The inside of the chapel was massive and filled with people. Well, people and demons. A lot of the guests of this "Party" were the same goat-headed demons I had seen before. Others appeared to be normal humans wearing goat head masks. I could even see Belphegor, and some other girls who were presumably the other 6 stakes of purgatory floating around. But that part I actually did kind of expect.
Far on the other side of the room, adorned on a pair of crosses in front of massive stained glass windows, and illuminated by a single shaft of light was, well…
"Kyon… Is that really us?"
Both Haruhi and I were bound to wooden crosses in thick, glowing red chains, hanging limply and apparently either dead or unconscious. It's not exactly the first time I've seen another 'me' before, but there's got to be an explanation for this, right?
Only a few 'people' seemed to react to our presence, glancing over in our direction as we came through the door then turning back, disinterested. All the goats and humans were dressed in fancy, ballroom attire, sitting at tables, drinking from wine glasses. It had all the trappings of an incredibly elegant gathering.
"Kyon… What you said about goats… and demons… that's really all this is, huh?"
Haruhi's expression was one of stunned disbelief. I put my hand on her arm to try and comfort her somewhat. Whatever this actually is, whether it's an illusion or we're actually dead – Let's just keep moving forward, okay?
"You don't have to believe what you see here. The Golden Land by its very definition is just an illusion."
Between mine and Battler's vague and useless reassurances Haruhi nodded slightly, swallowing audibly before we all continued forward. The doors closed behind us, and we made our way up the center aisle, occasionally ducking around guests who didn't get out of the way. Although the room was filled with the general din of conversation, two distinct voices became audible as we approached the altar of the chapel where our bodies were on display.
"Oh Bern, this is going to be so much fun! I can't wait – We haven't had new toys like this in such a long time! They put up quite the struggle, but it was a glorious victory for us in the end! What should we do with them first, huh?"
"Patience, Lambda. We have all of infinity to play with them until we get bored – until their bodies and spirits are broken, battered, and torn beyond all recognition. Especially that girl. There's something special about her, and if my suspicions are correct, a lot of new doors have opened up for us.
There was the clink of glasses meeting together, and as we reached the front of the crowd it was obvious who the voices belonged too. Two girls sat on elaborate thrones, turned to face each other as they sipped from glasses of wine. Whatever amusement they were sharing vanished when they caught sight of the three of us, their eyes widening with surprise.
"Kyon, Haruhi! These are the two I was talking about. Bernkastel and Lambdadelta: the Gamemasters. They're the ones responsible for everything."
Just telling us names doesn't really explain much, although I'll admit – this whole place kind of has a 'final boss' vibe to it. The whole room went silent at Battler's introduction, and both girls recovered from their momentary surprise, turning to peer down at us arrogantly.
"Look Bern! Some pieces made it into the party! Looks like that worthless doll at the door can't even do her job properly. What do you think, Battler? We won quite a spectacular victory over your friend's higher counterparts. Don't worry; we'll be leaving here shortly. We got what we came for, right? We're going to leave the game running of course, but if you get down and beg for mercy, we won't abolish those two pieces you're with now. Then the three of you can flounder around hopelessly forever – but you'll be together!"
Piece this, piece that. Whatever this conversation is about, it seems nobody was going to fill me in. Of course, Battler seemed to understand it all, considering he's apparently been aware of all this crap from the beginning. What a load.
"Spectacular victory? Don't make me laugh. All you did was resort to a cheap trick. And you call yourselves witches? Feh. Boo~ring."
Battler's scathing insult was punctuated by the sound of shattering glass as one of the guests apparently dropped something, then an icy silence. Both Lambdadelta and Bernkastel stared as if they'd just been slapped with a dueling glove.
"What right does a piece like you have to criticize me? You; stuck in and endless web of lies and illusions? If you think your fate is the worst torture that could be waiting for you, Battler, than you've sadly underestimated me."
"A web of lies and illusions? Please. How stupid do you have to be to actually believe that I couldn't figure out the truth after so long?"
As he met Bernkastel's cold threat, Battler crouched down, pulling something from the ground. It was… a sword? Yeah, there's no doubt. Like Arthur drawing Caliburn from the stone, Battler produced a sword of shining, golden light seemingly from nowhere. Judging by the gasps of surprise from around the room, this was as shocking to them as it was to me.
"Yeah. [Red] I know the truth! [Red] I have for a long, long time. How could I not figure out her heart after so long? But it doesn't matter, does it! I've uncovered every mystery this game board has to offer, stripped every truth bare!I've both stopped everyone from dying and killed every member of my family with my bare hands, just to see what would happen!"
Battler leveled his weapon at Bernkastel, a mad glint in his eyes as he continued his tirade.
"But none of it mattered! No matter what I did, who I saved, who I killed, I would just wake up the next day, and nobody but me would remember anything! You never put any clause for victory into this game – it's been nothing but a torture simulator from the very beginning!"
Battler's declaration hung in the air for a moment, before both witches burst with raucous laughter. Soon, the rest of the crowd followed suit, until only Haruhi and I weren't mocking his plight.
"Well well. You really are an entertaining piece, Battler. Did I really not put in a victory condition? How clumsy of me. I really shouldn't cut corners like that. But what of it? I can see by that golden longsword you really do know the truth – Do you plan to save your friends with it? Surely you still care for her, don't you? Will you expose her ugly, naked truth for them? Everyone here would certainly love to see it too. Not to mention, if you think saving them will save you, you're wrong."
Bernkastel's voice was mockingly warm, like a cat toying with its prey. Battler blanched, lowering his sword slightly, looking conflicted. What is all this? Who is this mysterious girl we keep hearing about? Beatrice, the one we met in the gold chamber? Where did she go, anyway?
"Ooh, Bern! I have a great idea!"
Lambdadelta dashed to Bernkastel's side and began whispering fervently in her ear. Whatever she said it must've been something she liked because Bern's smile grew into a sadistic grin.
"Oh, that's just perfect. Battler, I think we can work something out here. You see, after all the hard work we've done to acquire our new toys, I'd really hate to lose them. Since you know the truth, you can cut them down easily. But why bother? It won't get you what you want. But I can give it to you."
Bernkastel waved her hand, and a golden door appeared at the back of the chapel, in-between the two crosses bearing our other selves.
"Right there is the exit. It leads straight to the fragment sea and away from this game board forever. You've earned your freedom – Because of your accomplishment, I'll give you my blessing as the Witch of Miracles. You'll be a voyager just like us, free to roam all worlds and do whatever you please. You're even free to come back and hunt me down for revenge; though I'd suggest waiting a couple hundred years. You've still got a long way to go.
All you have to do is walk out the door and don't look back."
At her final statement, I froze, my mouth going completely dry. This has been pretty incomprehensible so far, but at least I could understand this much. Battler could get his freedom – after a thousand years of torture. All he had to do was leave us behind.
Yeah, these two were definitely the bad guys alright. It's the sadistic choice the villains always demand at the end, but the hero always decides to take a third option and thwart it anyways.
But, judging by the look in Battler's eyes, I don't think that's going to be happening this time. He took one look towards us, his eyes full of pain, regret, apology, but steeled his gaze and turned away, walking towards the door.
I made a half step towards him, to call out, to say something, but my voice caught in my throat. What could I even say? Ask him to refuse the offer? I mean, sure, we're friends, but we've only known each other for three days at the most. I loathe admitting it, but if our positions reversed, I'd probably do the same thing.
Haruhi let out a strangled cry of indignation, but I put my hand on her shoulder and shook my head. Just… let him go, okay? We'll find a way through this on our own.
I took the chance to look around the chapel some more as Battler made his way towards the door, listlessly dragging his sword behind him. It looks like we're surrounded by enemies on all sides. I'm not sure what all these demons are capable of, but I'd rather not stick around to find out. There's got to be something important about the other two of us on those crosses, right? Maybe we should try and get closer.
"Hah. Don't make me laugh. Do you really think I'd let you get what you want? Expose her heart in the process? Yeah right. Your pathetic red has nothing but shock value – Any idiot can weave a blue truth to beat it!"
With his hand inches from the doorknob, Battler turn and spun, slicing his sword towards the two crosses, the weapon leaving a trail of blue as it struck.
"[Blue] In regards to the murders of Shannon, Jessica, George, and Maria:
Your red truth has a glaringly obvious flaw – The statement of death for each person was only given at the end of the game! As long as one person was still alive and hiding in the room, these murders are still possible! They just died later for some unspecified reason, thus it becomes possible to say X is dead!
In regards to the murders of Eva and Rosa:
It was never stated that Eva and Rosa were killed in the library! The culprit found them in another room, killed them both, and then never left that room. Then I took both bodies to the library using the hidden door I created, and posed them there!
[Blue]"
"Two down, just one more to go. Hey, maybe you guys want to beg for mercy? The last one is tricky – You almost built yourselves a perfect wall there. Your final closed room is an entirely self-constructed mystery, regarding who killed Dr. Nanjo. Again with the cheap tricks, but you made one tiny mistake; that allows me to construct this theory!"
[Blue] In regards to the murder of Dr. Nanjo:
It's still possible to kill Dr. Nanjo "Up close and personal" without being in the room! You just have to assume Dr. Nanjo was standing near the open door when the culprit snuck up and stabbed him; all without entering the room!
[Blue]"
A glorious arc of blue light severed the red chains holding us to the crosses, and I watched our forms fall to the ground painfully. Laughing jovially, Battler once again leveled his sword towards Bernkastel, who was already frothing with rage.
"You idiot! How dare you! You're stupid enough to pass up such a generous gift? I'll make you regret every moment I created you! I'll slice your pathetic truth to pieces! [Red] Eva and Rosa died in the lib- [Red] mmmph!"
Whatever Bernkastel was about to say, it was cut off as Lambdadelta grabbed her from behind, clamping her hands over her mouth.
"Bern, stop! If we challenge it, than that means the game is open for debate again, and we have the possibility of losing."
"Yeah, that's right. Come on. Deny my blue. But if you did that, and I happened to reveal the truth, you'd stand to lose a lot more than just your precious prizes.
I could feel the rage seeping from Bernkastel – the whole room seemed to heat up, and every guest suddenly vanished in a cloud of golden butterflies. Still keeping his sword leveled on the witches, Battler turned and called out to us.
"Yo, hurry up and get to yourselves! We don't have much time."
I turned to Haruhi and she met me with a wide grin, the happiest I'd seen her in what felt like a long time. We both made a mad dash for the altar, quickly reaching our own unconscious forms on the ground.
It was uncanny seeing me like that, but it wouldn't be the first time. I had a sneaking suspicion as to what would happen when I touched myself, and I was absolutely right.
A rapid stream of memories invaded my head, memories of these twisted girls and their antics, of watching myself on the game board, of living the experience himself. It was a twisted, distorted sensation of being in two places at once, seeing the same thing from different eyes. The simultaneous guilt of treating myself as a piece, and revulsion at learning I was a piece.
It was all over in an instant, and there was just one of me there. Looking over, I could see Haruhi had gone through the same thing. My head hurt, but at least I've been through this before. I stood up wearily, turning to our savior.
"Thanks, Battler. Looks like we owe you one. But what do we do now?"
Bernkastel was screaming now, and I could only see the whites of her eyes. An intense, increasing heat was radiating out from her, and if this continued for much longer we'd all be cooked alive. Lambdadelta seemed to be holding onto her in a sort of full nelson, trying to calm her down, but it wasn't working. Is that golden sword of yours strong enough to defeat them?
"In a straight up fight? Nope, not a chance. Sorry man, but I didn't think this far ahead. Well, you guys still have a chance. Here, catch."
Battler flicked something back towards us, a shining gold speck of light. I caught it without thinking, and saw it was a tiny butterfly. As the light warmed my hand, I realized it was a bit of knowledge – a tiny golden truth, and I knew how we could get out of here.
But then…
"Battler! What about you? Do you really expect us to leave you here with her?"
"Kyon, no way! I won't let him sacrifice himself like that!"
"Aww, come on guys, you're embarrassing me. Don't worry about it. I have my own plan; I just can't do it when you're still here."
Are you absolutely sure of this? Look, those two are ruthless. We can't let you fight them alone.
"You can, and you will. I'll ask you one last time. Do you trust me?"
I stopped, and turned to Haruhi. Did we trust him? I gave into doubt and despair before, but he proved me wrong anyways. I think we owe him this much. Haruhi looked troubled, but slowly nodded before shouting back.
"I swear, if we don't see you again, I'll find you somehow, and make whatever these witches did to you look like child's play! Promise you'll come find us!"
"Yeah. It's a promise. Now hurry."
I held out the golden butterfly to Haruhi and she put her hand on it, the soft glow becoming much more intense. With a final nod, we took a deep breath, and delivered our final lines.
"Hey you two! I know we did it before, but let me introduce us again. [Red] I'm Haruhi Suzumiya, and you can call him Kyon! [Red]"
"" We're sorry to spoil your fun, but –
[Red] The only time we existed on Rokkenjima is the summer of 2011. [Red]""
