Chapter 7
Disclaimer: I don't own anything.
A couple of hours after the tube was removed from down Alex's throat Olivia and Barba are still sitting where they were sitting only now Ella is once more playing with the toys that Lucia brought and Lucy packed for her, both Olivia and Barba looking between the toddler and Alex.
As she watches Olivia feels her phone vibrate so she pulls it out to check.
"I'll be right back." Olivia says after reading the message that has appeared on her screen.
"Bring coffee with you." Barba requests, which causes Olivia to give him a look as she stands up, "Please." He adds.
"I'll think about it." Olivia says a she exits the room.
When she exits Alex's room Olivia spots George standing over by the nurses' station so she walks over to him.
"Is something wrong? Has something else happened?" Olivia asks without even saying hello.
"No." George says, "Fin suggested that I talk to you before approaching Barba, and Alex's daughter." George explains.
"Right, of course he did." Olivia says, "Fin thinks that as well as talking to Ella that you should talk to Barba as well." She explains.
"And you disagree." George guesses.
"No. I actually think it would be a good idea." Olivia admits.
"You do." George says, surprised by that.
"Yeah, I do." Olivia says, "Barba's feeling a lot of pain and a lot of guilt, I just don't see him talking about it." She admits.
"I'll see what I can do." George responds, "How's Alex?"
"Okay…I think." Olivia says uncertainly, "The doctors removed the breathing tube earlier and she seems to be doing better."
"That's good. Removing the breathing tube is a good thing." George says.
"That's what the doctor said. It seems like now the only thing we can do is wait for Alex to wake." Olivia says.
"That's because it is." George says, "There is nothing else that can be done until Alex wakes up."
"I hate this." Olivia says sadly.
"I know." George says comforting and the two of them drift into silence.
"Let's go see Alex." Olivia says after a couple of minutes.
"Lead the way." George responds and that's just what Olivia does.
After Olivia leaves the room Barba barely notices that she is gone as he is too focused on Alex. He has always known how stubborn Alex is, how far she will go to get justice, which is why he didn't try to talk her out of continuing to pressure Zapata, but he also knew how emotionally affected Alex is by cases like that and how far she would go to get justice, just like another case a year and a half before Zapata.
February 22nd 2002
After being suspended by Donnelly Alex returned to her apartment and she had only managed to get changed when she heard a knock at her door so she went to answer it. When Alex opened the door she found Barba standing on the other side, clearly having come straight from his office, something which didn't surprise her as even though he had a key he, more often than not, knocked.
"Is it true?" Barba asked as soon as he saw Alex.
"How have you heard already?" Alex asked as she let Barba into her apartment, having closed the door behind him.
"Lawyers talk." Barba said simply, "So is it?" He asked, "Did you lie about having a search warrant and undertake an illegal search?" he asked as the two of them walked to the kitchen, Barba having dropped his briefcase on the couch as he walked past.
"Yeah." Alex confirmed.
"Qué demonios, Lexie?" Barba asked, shocked, "Why would you do that?" he asked as he sat down on the kitchen counter and loosened his tie, while Alex grabbed some a bottle of scotch and started to pour two glasses.
"Because Roy Barnett destroys lives, he destroyed Sam Cavanaugh and who knows who else; and I wasn't going to let him do that to anyone else." Alex explained as she handed a glass to Barba and sat down on the counter across from him.
"That's noble." Barba commented as he took a drink, "Completely unethical, and reckless, but noble." Barba admitted, "How bad's the fall out?" he asked curious as he didn't hear that.
"I think I've made a permanent enemy in Petrovsky, and a month's suspension." Alex explains.
"That's not as bad as it could be." Barba commented.
"No, it's not."
"You're still going to be out of your mind with boredom by the end of the weekend though." Barba commented, having been amused by that.
"True." Alex admitted as she took a drink, "Think your Mami could use some help at the school?" she asks curious.
"I think she could always use some help, and would be thrilled to have you." Barba commented.
"I'll go see her tomorrow or Sunday then."
"Let me know when." Barba requested.
"Of course."
"Any chance you are going to use this time off to drive up and see your mother?" Barba asked curious, though he already knew the answer.
"And listen to her say over and over again how dad was right, no thanks." Alex commented and because he knew that it was the truth Barba couldn't help but give a snort of amusement, "Although that might be more pleasant than the conversation I have to have with Olivia." Alex admitted.
"Olivia, why? What happened?" Barba asked.
"She and Stabler were the ones I lied to. I told them that I had a search warrant so that they could do the search on good faith and not get in trouble." Alex explains.
"Ah, I see." Barba said, "That's not going to be pleasant."
"Yeah, I don't even know where we stand." Alex admitted as she downed the rest of her drink, "Let's talk about something else. If I continue to talk about the state of my love life or what happened to Sam I'll drink this bottle all by myself." Alex commented as she pours herself another drink.
"Then what do you want to talk about?" Barba asked.
"How about your love life. You had a date last night, right?" Alex asked as Barba had been having problems with his partner that they were working on, and so she knew that the date the night before was a big deal as they were trying to figure things out.
"I did." Barba confirmed, taking another drink himself.
"And? How did it go?" Alex asked when Barba didn't say anymore.
"I'm not sure."
"You're not sure?" Alex asked, having given Barba a looked which said, 'keep talking.'
"It started great, but then I got a call from work." Barba said, pausing to take a drink, "I don't think that went down too well."
"I'm sorry." Alex said, not sure what else to say.
"It's okay, that's the price we pay for loving our jobs." Barba comments.
"I'll drink to that." Alex commented.
"Right now you'll drink to anything." Barba said as he jumps down from the counter, having put his glass down, "But that's enough." He said having walked over to Alex and taken the glass out of her hand, "We're going to go out to dinner, because you never have ingredients to make meals, on me, and you're going to try not to think about everything that has happened. Then tomorrow you are going to go talk to Olivia, and then call me so we can go see my mother for Saturday roast, deal?" Barba asked.
"Deal." Alex said as she jumped down from the counter, "Thanks, Rafi."
"Anytime, Lexie." Barba responded.
"Barba." A voice says snapping him out of his thoughts.
"Yeah?" He asked and Barba looks up to see Olivia and George standing together.
"Dr Huang is here to talk to Ella." Olivia explains.
"Right, I wish it was under different circumstances, but it's good to see you again, Doctor." Barba says standing up.
"It's good to see you too, Councillor." George says and the two of them shake hands.
"Has anyone found anything on Torres, about where he could be?" Barba asks George.
"No, not yet." George answers sadly.
"Great." Barba says sarcastically, "Fin said that it would be a good idea for you to talk to, Ella." Barba says, completely changing the subject.
"Considering what she saw I think it would be a good idea." George says as even though she may not be able to express it Ella is bound to have been traumatised by what she saw.
"Ella can only say a few words, granted more than others her age because Lexie, Mami and I talk to her all the time, but how are you going to talk to her?" Barba asks as from something Alex made him read a few weeks ago he knows that Ella's language development is better than it should be at her age.
"She might not be able to talk much but she can communicate." George says, "I've set up a room down the hall with things that Ella will be able to express herself with." He explains, "It could do a lot to help her."
"Okay." Barba says before walking over to Ella, "Ella, Pequeña, there is someone here to see you." Barba says as he squats down next to his niece. Hearing her Uncle Ella puts down the blocks she is playing with and looks up at him.
"Up." Ella says and Barba picks her up and walks over to George and Olivia, "Ella is this George, he's a friend of your Mommy." Barba says, causing Ella to look surprised.
"Hi Ella, I've known your Mommy a very long time, it's very nice to meet you." George says, with a smile, doing his best to help Ella feel comfortable.
"Hi." Ella says, it being clear that she is nervous as she has met a lot of new people in the last two days.
"HI. You know I would really like to talk to you, would you be okay with that?" George asks and Ella looks to Barba, it's clear that she doesn't know what to think.
"It's okay Ella, you can trust George, I promise." Barba says and Ella still looks uncertain.
"You really can, Ella." Olivia tells her.
"And you can come back to your….." George says, trailing off as he isn't sure what to refer to Barba as.
"Tío Rafi." Barba supplies.
"Tío Rafi, at any time." George finishes and Ella gives a small nod.
"Okay, do you want to walk?" Barba asks Ella who nods and so he places her back down on the ground and once Ella is standing George reaches down and Ella who hesitantly reaches up and grabs his hand.
"We won't be long." George says and he and Ella walk out of the room.
"What were you thinking about when we walked in?" Olivia asks curious as she and Barba walk back over to their respective seats.
"Something from a long time ago." Barba comments and Olivia just gives him a look, "What Lexie and I did after she was suspended for a month." He explains.
"Oh, I see." Olivia comments, "When exactly did Alex come back to New York?" Olivia asks, not being able to help her curiosity any longer.
"She called me a few days after the case with Lena Olson and Rollins's sponsor." Barba explains, "Lexie almost came to the Lewis trail." Barba says to Olivia's shock.
"Really?" Olivia asks shocked.
"Really." Barba confirms.
January 1st 2014
It has been well over a month since Alex returned to New York and in that time she spend a week staying at Barba's apartment before they both stayed at Alex's first new place as Alex wasn't completely okay with being alone yet and Barba's apartment was too easy to find.
"And you're sure that you're okay with this? Because I can here for a while too." Barba asked Alex as they sat together on the couch, Alex's hands resting on her stomach, neither of them were paying much attention to what was on the TV.
"I'm sure." Alex assured him, "I've got to stay on my own at some point and I've taken over enough of your life as it is." Alex said as she had just moved into a new place.
"I don't mind, Lexie, really." Barba told her as he looked up from the files he was reading.
"I know you don't, you never do." Alex says, "But I need to start to stand on my own two feet, and with the baby coming and how busy you're going to be with the trial, now's a good time."
"Yeah, it is." Barba confirmed, as he leant back on the couch, "Have you made up your mind about what you want to do yet?" he asked curious.
"I'm not sure." Alex admitted, "I want to go to support Olivia, but what if he is expecting that? And I'm not sure that it would be fair to Olivia to show up, eight months pregnant, without a world; especially considering what she is going though." Alex said, "And I don't think I'm ready for Liv to know everything yet." Alex admitted.
"Sleep on it." Barba suggested, "Make up your mind in the morning."
"I will." Alex responded.
"I wish she had come. It would have meant a lot." Olivia says once Barba finishes his expiation.
"She wasn't ready." Barba says, "She wanted to be, but she wasn't." he admits.
"And she is now?" Olivia asks as she can't help but worry about how Alex is going to react when she wakes.
"She's more than she was." Barba says diplomatically, "But that doesn't mean it won't be a shock and an adjustment." Barba says and the two of them drift into silence. Barba knowing without a doubt that Alex will still be terrified of Torres when she wakes, especially considering the connection he has to Velez.
About half an hour after George and Ella left Alex's room the door opens and they walk in once more.
"Why don't you go play while I talk to your Tío Rafi." George suggests to Ella, who, without a word rushes over to the toys.
"Outside?" Barba asks.
"Yeah." George responds and with one last look at Alex he gets up and heads out of the room.
"So, how's Ella? In your professional opinion." Barba asks after he and George have walked out of Alex's room.
"In my professional opinion it's a good thing she's so young." George admits.
"But?" Barba asks, being able to tell that there is more to what George is saying.
"But it's still affecting her." George says, "She is scared and doesn't exactly understand what happened, you're going to have to constantly re assure her that Alex is okay." he says, "And you shouldn't be surprised if she is more affectionate and clingy than normal."
"Olivia suggested that maybe having Ella spend some time out of the hospital, some time with Lucy and Noah, would be a good idea. What do you think?" Barba asks George, wanting his opinion.
"I think that a couple of hours away from the hospital could do Ella a lot of good." George explains, "Provided that you talk to her about what is going on first." He says.
"I will do that." Barba responds.
"You know it won't hurt you to spend some time away from the hospital." George tells Barba.
"I can't, not until Lexie is okay." Barba informs George.
"Fin and Olivia are worried about you." George informs him.
"They should be worrying about Lexie, not me." Barba says before heading back towards the Alex's room.
"That response is exactly why they are worried, and why, they have reason to be." George says in response before Barba can walk too far, "Just because you are worried about Alex doesn't mean you can't look after yourself." George says walking towards Barba.
"I'll remember that." Barba says before walking back to the room, leaving George standing in the hall with a concerned look on his face.
It has been a few hours since George came to Alex's hospital room and Barba and Olivia, with Ella who is still having her afternoon nap, are the only ones in the room.
"I need to spend tonight at home, with Noah." Olivia tells Barba, deciding to break the silence, "But I will have my cell on if anything changes."
"Okay." Barba says, "Would you mind if Ella spend the night at yours?" Barba asks, "Like Huang said it would be good for her to spend some time away." Barba says and he knows that Alex would be fine with Ella staying with Olivia, in fact she is the only person other than him or his mother that Alex would be okay with Ella staying with.
"Sure, I don't mind." Olivia says, "Have you thought about taking an hour? Getting out of this room for a while?"
"I can't. I need to be here when Lexie wakes up."
"You also need to clean up, maybe change your clothes." Olivia comments, "And get some actual rest."
"I'll rest when Lexie is awake." Barba says, there being no room for argument in his voice.
"Fine." Olivia says with a sigh, realising that there is no point in arguing with him, "I've talked to Munch. He'll stay while I'm at home." Olivia informs Barba.
"Fine with me." Barba says, being pretty sure that he wouldn't notice who else is in the room.
"And like I said, call if anything changes." Olivia requests.
"I will." Barba promises.
"Good." Olivia says and they both drift back into silence.
It has been a few hours since Olivia and Barba talked about Olivia and Ella going back to Olivia's for the night and while Barba is silently watching Alex Olivia is reading to Ella. When they hear the door open both Olivia and Barba look towards it but because Ella is on Olivia's lap she can't pull her gun.
"Mami." Barba says as his mother walks in carrying several bags.
"Rafael." Lucia says to her son, who has come over to help "I brought you some food. You need to eat something other than hospital food." She says as she puts the food on the patient table.
"Thank you, Mami."
"Abuelita." Ella says happily.
"Ella." Lucia greats with a smile, "How's Lexie?" Lucia asks her son.
"The same. The Doctors aren't sure when she'll wake." Barba admits, as he looks in the bags to see what his mother has brought, "But it should be within the next day or so." He informs his mother.
"Good, that's good." Lucia says, "Eat, all three of you." Lucia tells her son, Ella and Olivia.
"Yes, Mami."
A few hours later Lucia has left because she has work to do, though she clearly didn't want to. The main reason why she did agree to leave is because Barba promised that he would call if anything changes.
"Night shift is here." Munch says walking into the room.
"Is there anything new?" Olivia asks when she sees him.
"No." Munch answers.
"Nothing?" Barba asks.
"Nope, the guy's making it really hard for us to find him. We can't even get a hint about where he is." Munch admits.
"That's just great." Olivia says sarcastically, "I was really hoping that we would have some good news by now."
"We'll get him, we always do." Munch says.
"Yeah, I guess." Olivia mutters, "So, I'll be back first thing in the morning." Olivia tells Barba and Munch. In response to that Barba nods and walks over to where Ella is sitting and playing with blocks.
"Pequeña." Barba says as he squats down next to her, "How would you feel about going with Olivia for a while?"
"Why?" Ella asks.
"So that you can spend some time away from here, and so that you can meet Olivia's son Noah." Barba says, "You'll be making a new friend, just like you do when you go to the park." Barba says, "What do you think about that?" Barba asks and Ella just look uncertain, "You can call me at any time and come back." Barba promises.
"Okay." Ella says and she sticks up her arms for Barba to pick her up, which he does.
"You'll be on your best behaviour for Olivia, right?" Barba asks as he walks over to where Olivia is standing.
"Yes." Ella says in response.
"Good."
"Hey, Ella. How about we get going." Olivia says to the toddler, "We'll call your Tío before you go to bed." Olivia promises.
"I'll talk to you later, Te quiero, Ella." Barba tells his niece, in such a quiet tone that Olivia can barely hear, before placing a kiss on the top of her head, "Call me if she needs something, no matter the time." Barba says to Olivia.
"I will." Olivia responds as she takes Ella from Barba and picks up the bag that Lucy prepared, "Say Bye, Bye, Ella." Olivia says and Barba waves goodbye to Barba.
"I'll see you in the morning." Olivia says and she and Ella leave. Once he watches Olivia go Barba walks back over and sits back down in his seat, picking up the coffee he started to drink just before Munch arrived.
In the hours after Olivia left with Ella Munch falls asleep but Barba doesn't. Barba just continues to drink coffee like it is water and stares at Alex, watching and waiting for any sign of movement which is why he notices the second Alex's eyes start to flutter.
"Lexie." Barba says rushing over, "Lexie, can you hear me?" Barba asks reaching out and grabbing Alex's hand the one that's not in a cast, "Lexie, if you can hear me open your eyes." Barba asks as out of the corner of his eye he sees Munch sit up. "Lexie?" he asks once more and Alex's eyes flutter open, "Welcome back sleepy beauty." Barba says.
"Ella." Alex says, I being clear that it is difficult for her to do so.
