(Part 7)
I woke up to the smell of alcohol fumes and a pounding in my head. I hadn't thought I'd had that much but my raging hangover said otherwise.
The reason for my departure from sleep became instantly apparent. There was a knocking at my door. My bedroom door. Light and rhythmic. Then all of a sudden a raucous pounding.
"Harry!" I heard the hiss from my place in bed, as I covered my throbbing head with the covers and prayed for them to leave me alone.
"C'mon Gin, I've gotta have my fun."
"Screw off, Potter!" I yelled.
The door swung open immediately and Ginny and Harry stood silhouetted by unwelcome light in its place. I peeked tentatively out over my covers. They looked shockingly bright-eyed, though clearly had just rolled out of bed and, by the looks of the matching Holyhead Harpies flannel pants, they were planning on a lazy sunday morning. Ginny sported a plate full of sausages and breakfast rolls.
"I brought hangover food!" She said in a tempting - and courteously soft - singsong voice.
"AND MORE ALCOHOL!" Added Harry, practically yelling to annoy me as he whipped a jug out from behind his back.
I groaned and buried my head back under the blankets.
"It's alright, 'Mione. It's only orange juice. I'll put on a pot of coffee too if you like."
I was starting to perk up at those words. After a brief pause of decision making, I gingerly pulled myself out from under the covers, grabbed my fluffy robe off of its hook, and trudged over to hug them with a suspicious grimace on my face.
They both threw their spare arms around me. Ginny pulled back, coughing. "Hermione, your hair is really a bit out of control... let me help."
I swatted her "helpful" hand away and reached up to touch what appeared to be a crisp bird's nest attached to my head.
"Mmm…" I mumbled. "You're right."
I stuck out an open hand and my wand flew from my dresser and into it. With a quick wave I felt the strands pulling themselves harmlessly apart and arranging themselves into a braid. I gave my friends my best attempt at a smile, although I'm sure it came off painfully forced.
Harry laughed openly, but Ginny attempted to cover hers a bit, exclaiming, "Better! Now food!"
"I won't argue with that!" Harry clapped a hand over my shoulder and guided me over to my couch in the offensively bright living room.
He pushed me down and plopped down next to me as Ginny bustled around my kitchen for plates, silverware, and mugs. I put my head in my hands.
"Merlin's beard." Harry said softly.
I looked up to find him staring lovingly at his fiancée. The look in his eyes was sweet. It filled me with a bit of a bubbly happiness so I began to uncurl myself from the inadvertent hungover ball I'd assumed.
"I'm so glad to see you so content. You really seem… at peace," I remarked with a bit of a sigh.
"Yeah, I am," said Harry, with a little twitch in his face that told me he'd never really thought of it that way before.
"Like I said, I couldn't be more glad for you."
"So, how are you this morning?" He asked, a teasing smile on his face.
I groaned, "Why do I feel like I woke up in a pile of rubbish on the side of the road?"
"Did you have the champagne?" Harry was relishing in my state. After all the times I'd teased him for being in this exact place, I probably deserved it.
"Yes…?"
"It's enchanted. Comes out to about 60 proof."
I made the most exaggeratedly disappointed face I could come up with and he laughed.
I sighed, "At least that explains it… although I probably needed something like that last night."
Harry gave me a knowing look that then turned back to the concern he'd expressed the night before, "How are you?"
"Oh, I'd say I've been better," I gave a little half chuckle before my post-drinking fragility encouraged tears to start to bubble up in my eyes.
In his very Harry way, he didn't say anything, only looked at me that way he always did and put an arm over me. I sank into his shoulder and let the comfort of my friend wash over me. I'd needed this, more than he knew. Ginny returned with breakfast, sitting down on the other side of me on the sofa and taking my hand.
I looked up at her kind face, "Do you want to talk about it?"
"I don't even know what I'd say. It's not that I'm not happy for them. I am. I mean I am…"
Ginny raised an eyebrow at me.
"That's the thing, I don't actually want it to be any other way. I don't want to marry Ronald Weasley. It did not work out for us and there were some good reasons for that, but I think it's just…"
I stopped and no one filled the silence. No one touched their food. No one offered me an out.
So I continued, in a sad but resigned way, "It was always the three of us. Harry, Ron, and me. And we've made so many lovely friends along the way and, even our relationship, Gin; it's gotten so much stronger, but things have been changing so fast these past few years. For the longest time we were all so stressed and held together by so much and things were just one way … and then all of a sudden the war was over, and everything was just different. Forever. I went back to school, and it wasn't the same. And then Harry, you and Ron went to work. And then Ron and I broke up and then it was never the same there either. And then I went to work and it's so lovely at the ministry but… so hard so much of the time. And now we're all busy and adults and just in the full swing of the lives we're all starting and I keep trying to bring it back to the good stuff I used to cling to. I think I need it more than I've realized but I can't have it. I don't think I really articulated it until last night but we can't go back we just have to keep moving forward and as much as I know that's true, each little movement towards that is like stepping on glass for me... I guess I just need some time."
I broke out of my own head to find that Ginny was tearing up, "Oh, Hermione."
Then I noticed Harry had started to stare off sadly into space, his eyes glazing over like he was in a different world and his body had stiffened. Ginny touched his thigh and he seemed to jolt back, pursing his lips and getting himself back together.
Harry whispered, "I know, Hermione. I'm there, too."
"But we're here for you! That's the point! We're going to make time. We need to. For all of our sakes!" Ginny assured me, stroking Harry's leg as he gradually returned to reality.
I nodded.
"Do you get nightmares, Hermione?" Ginny asked softly. "Because Harry…" He shot her a look so icy I nearly jumped. But Ginny wasn't backing down, "No, Harry. That's the point. We need to come together to support each other or we'll all break down! Harry's been having nightmares and these awful episodes. It's really hard on him."
I pulled back from my place curled into his shoulder to look at him. His jaw was set and he was staring at Ginny without actually looking at her. He seemed deep in his head.
"Is that true?" I asked him gently.
"I know what you're going to say. That I need to get more help and do more but honestly Hermione -"
I dropped a hand on the top of his head and ruffled his hair, "I'm not going to say that." The look in my eyes said everything else.
He shook his head and sort of choked out a smirk, "Alright."
"I get them too, sometimes," I offered, dropping back down to my place in his shoulder. "They're awful."
Ginny was now petting my hand and Harry's leg quite rapidly, "I know how strong you are! This is why we come together!"
"Actually, I think I'd take the Hungarian Horntail right now over this. At least it gave me something productive to do," Harry said bluntly.
Ginny looked a bit horrified, but I could hear Harry starting to laugh. I bit my lip as I started to giggle, too. And then Ginny softened and we all sort of fell into one another, howling with laughter.
"This is all shite," I remarked through my fit.
Harry gave me a nod and a grin, then grabbed his plate and a fork and shoved a big bite of sausage into his mouth. This set us all into a renewed bout of howls.
They stayed well into the afternoon, talking for most of the time, and playing chess the rest. Harry was attempting to teach me how to improve, but Ginny sat steadfastly out of the rounds, saying Ron had beaten out all her desire to ever be involved in chess again. As he pointed out opportunities for better moves, Ginny amused us with stories from her youth of her brothers, mostly torturing her, but interspersed with the rare sweet moments.
Finally, around three 3, I could feel the visit wrapping up. As Ginny stood to get her stuff and go, she turned to me. With a look of realization on her face, she swiveled and dropped back into her seat, leaning forwards toward me.
"Hermione, I almost forgot! What in the name of Dumbledore were you up to last night?" She asked with curiosity on her face.
"Well, I just…" and then the evening came rushing back to me. Right up to the bizarre end, and my eyes popped open wide as the shock hit me sober for the first time.
"What's that look?" Ginny asked, her excitement mounting.
My mouth sort of dropped open and I furrowed my brow as I looked for the right way to describe my evening to these people. Why did it even go down like it did? Why did I spend so much time with Cormac? I hate him, don't I? And what about that kiss? Even I couldn't really make heads or tails of it…
Harry was looking at me in anticipation, but it was Ginny who must have figured it out first. She let herself lean backwards in her chair. Her blue eyes narrowed at me and she raised an eyebrow in my direction. I froze. She didn't say a word at first, just crossed her arms, and stared.
A hot blush hit my face and I started to sink into my chair a bit. I stared at her with as much confidence as I could call upon and tried to look innocent.
Harry did notice Ginny though, and broke the silence, "What?"
He was looking swiftly between her and me with a puzzled look on his face. But Ginny didn't even look at him.
"Really?" She finally asked, making a disapproving clicking noise at me. "Cormac?"
And I knew she knew.
"Literally, I was just drunk and it was just one kiss for a second…" I started to ramble out an explanation, using my work presentation voice.
At the word "kiss" Harry caught up.
I kept trying to explain, "... He initiated it anyway and it was literally over so fast and then I went home alone. I swear…"
Ginny didn't move, just kept staring at me in disapproval and shaking her head.
"... Our boundaries are clear. I made sure of that…"
Harry's eyes had gone wide and I watched him go through the five stages of grief in about thirty seconds. Rather than hitting acceptance, he just sort of made it to a mixture of disgust and horror.
"Why? Hermione, WHY?" Harry seemed to be taking this as a personal affront.
"Honestly, I don't know what came over me but it meant absolutely nothing… It was all perfectly rational… Just a mindless distraction… And it certainly won't happen again…" I felt like a little kid getting interrogated by her parents.
Harry kept barreling forward, "Hermione! I thought you hated him? I don't understand..."
Ginny's silence was far more worrisome. So much so that I just started ignoring Harry's questions, and just watched her study me, eyes still squinting in my direction.
It took her another full minute before she broke eye contact, glancing around the room and taking a deep breath. She stood up and turned to Harry.
She addressed him in a calm voice, "Would you give us a minute, my love?" Then she turned to me, "Hermione, shall we have a chat in the bedroom?"
Oh, I was scared now. But I didn't argue. I got up and followed her into my little room off the kitchen. I turned back over my shoulder to give one last pleading look to Harry before Ginny confronted me. He still just looked confused, watching us walk away. I swear, Harry can be so thick sometimes.
She lit the lights in my room, opened my curtains, and sat down on my bed, patting the spot right next to her. I sat down reluctantly. She crossed her legs and looked at me a little more.
Finally she sighed and spoke, "Alright, I'm done intimidating you. I'm sure you've thought of all of the possible negative consequences and you're an adult and, like, I practically did the same thing with Dean Thomas so I can't really criticize you…"
"But you and Dean dated," I corrected her.
"That's what I'm saying… Granted I don't really know him but Cormac is a crafty bastard. I just don't want you to get sucked into his games, okay?" She put a hand on my shoulder.
"Oh don't worry about me. I'm not about to be caught up in his charm," I laughed and shook my head.
"Well…" She still had warning in her voice. "I'm around either way. I just want to make sure you're aware."
"Thanks, Gin," I smiled at her, and she tilted her head until it leaned against mine.
I got up to leave, and she grabbed my hand, "No, wait!"
"Why?" I asked.
"I wanna keep Harry in suspense. Gotta tease him to keep it spiced up," She started giggling and I laughed with her.
