Unborn

Madi:

I woke up to Bellamy moving his head at the foot of my cot. He had spent the whole night watching over me. I couldn't help but smile at how much he has already helped me since he got here. He really was as great as Clarke said.

Clarke. I quickly jump up as I remembered she was still unconscious from her surgery. She had been hit because of me. I wouldn't be able to live with myself knowing she got severely injured because of me. I sneak out of the room making sure that Bellamy doesn't wake up, he needed some proper rest.

The hallway was dark, there was no sign of anyone. I turn to Clarke's door. A shock went through my body as I mentally prepared myself to see her. My hand still on the door handle as I closed my eyes and inhaled. As I begin to exhale and turn the handle to the door I feel a hand on top of my own.

I quickly open my eyes to see Bellamy smiling down at me. "Together."

I smile back as I repeat, "Together." We open the door together. I walked in first as Bellamy followed. Raven was asleep next to Clarke, who still seemed to be out of it. I checked her pulse as she laid there. It was well and strong. As I took my hand away from her neck her eyes began to flutter open.

A large weight came off my shoulders. "Madi? Are you okay?" I can't help but laugh. Even when Clarke almost dies I'm still her number one priority. "Is Bellamy okay? Where is everyone?" Her throat was sore as her voice cracked.

Bellamy stepped forward, he began stroking her hair. Their eyes were locked. Relief filled the room as he bent over to kiss Clarke's forehead. "I'm right here. Don't worry." Tears fell down Clarke's cheeks as she looked back and forth from Bellamy's face to mine. "How about you get some rest and we talk later?"

"Yeah, we just wanted to check on you, you gave us quite the scare." Raven was awake. Her eyes filled with happiness as she saw Clarke awake. Clarke moved her hand to Raven's giving her a nice squeeze.

"Thank you, Raven. Without you," Clarke croaked. Tears continued to pour down Clarke's face. I had never truly seen cry. She cried by herself, but never in front of me. It felt like my heart was growing heavier and heavier as I watched her cry.

"Don't. You saved us too many times for me to have just let you go." Raven's eyes filled with tears, but she held them in as she squeezed Clarke's hand back.

"Clarke, can I sleep with you?" I just needed to be with her. She may not be my real mother, but she was no less than a real mother to me. Almost losing her was too much to bear. Tears burned in my eyes, but I held them in.

"Of course. I'll go get some cots for us," Bellamy said resting his hand on my shoulder. My body relaxed as touched me. I turned around and hugged Bellamy burying my face into his stomach as tears rolled down my cheeks. He pulled me away so he could see my face. "Remember what I told you? We're not going anywhere." He pulled me in for another quick hug before leaving to get the cots, helping Raven out as he left.

"I'm glad you had Bellamy while I couldn't be there for you." A smile crossed Clarke's face, the kind of smile that touched her eyes. She grabbed my hand running her thumb across my knuckles.

"Bellamy is just as amazing as you said he was. They all are." I stared at her taking in every detail of her face. "With them, I feel like our family is complete."

Clarke just stared at me. Her eyes scanning my face. "We have a big family. We fight and we argue, but that's because we love each other and would do anything for each other." Her face relaxed. She looked away going into a deep thought. Whenever Clarke thought of her family she lost herself in her thoughts.

Bellamy opens the door to the room carrying two cots. He sets one on both sides of Clarke. I quickly set up the blankets on top. "What bed would you like Bellamy?"

He gives me a soft smile. "You pick whichever one you want I'm going to go check on everyone once before we go back to sleep." He gives Clarke a small nod before leaving again.

I curl up into the cot next to Clarke. She quickly falls asleep again. I lay there holding her hand taking in everything that has happened within the past few days. According to Clarke things were way worse when they had first come to Earth. We had to fight. Fight for ourselves, fight for our people, fight for our family.

Bellamy:

I left Clarke's room after setting up the cots for Madi and I. I had no idea what time it was and I just wanted to do a check to make sure everything was okay.

First, I opened the door to Murphy and Emori's room, they were cuddled up on one cot fast asleep. At least Murphy was happy, he's less of a pain when he's happy.

Next, I entered Monty and Harper's room. They slept on the ground cuddled up on some sheets.

I entered Raven's room next to see if she had gone to sleep yet but I heard her snoring so I quickly left. She deserved some rest. She carried the most weight out of us all.

I leave turning towards Echo's room. I rest my hand on the handle hesitantly. Echo and I had a complicated relationship. On the ground, all she ever wanted to do was kill me, but as we went to space all of that changed.

I cracked the door open to see that the lights were on. "Echo? Are you awake?"

She pulled the door open. "What do you want Bellamy?" Her eyes were filled with anger. But I completely understood why she wouldn't want to talk to me. "What? Clarke's asleep so you need someone to pass some time?" Her voice was nearly shaking as her hands began to turn into fists at her side.

I looked down at my feet trying to avoid eye contact. I didn't know what to say. I wasn't fair to her. She didn't deserve to be used the way I used her. I was filled with regret. "I'm sorry Echo. I didn't know any of this would happen."

"I knew you loved her, but I was still there for you. In every way, possible." Her voice began to crack. Tears puddled in her eyes. "I loved you, Bellamy." Her tears slowly began falling down her cheeks. I couldn't speak. I couldn't move. I didn't want to do this to her. I step closer to Echo trying to wipe away her tears, but she pulls away from me. "I loved you almost as much as I loved our child." The wind was knocked out of me.

-Flashback-

I was filled with so much regret and anger. How could I let the woman I love die? I was weak. I could have saved her. We were supposed to be here. Together. I continued drinking Monty's moonshine. He had cut me off in the bar, but little did he know I had a secret stash in my room. Clarke's cell.

I stumbled around the ark. I didn't want to be alone anymore. I found myself in Echo's room. I stood in the doorway staring at her as she changed her clothes. I was looking at Echo, but my blurred vision drew out Clarke. It felt so real. As she turned around Clarke's face was all I saw.

I took a few steps closer. Slowly kissing her. "Stop Bellamy, you're drunk," she says pushing me away. I tilt my head to one side trying to look at her, but my vision is blurred.

"Are you judging me?" I let out a hiccup as I move closer. "You know I want you." I move my hands to her waist. She takes me in and I quickly lay her down. Kissing every inch of her.

The rest of the night really just turned into one big blur. I wake up in Echo's room, my head is pounding as I try to get up. I was defeated by my aching body. I had no idea why I was in Echo's room. I just remember having a dream of being with Clarke. It was one of the most vivid dreams I had ever had of her.

I roll over to find Echo sleeping next to me. She was wearing my shirt. A shock went through my body as I jumped up. No. No. No. No. I couldn't. Did I? I hope not. But I did. I look around to see the rest of our clothes scattered across the floor.

"Where are you going?" Echo rolled over looking at me. Her eyes meeting mine as she moved her hand up to rub them.

I quickly put my pants on. "I'm sorry Echo, that shouldn't have happened." I had to tell her that wasn't real. I had to tell her I was just dreaming over Clarke while I was with her. But I couldn't. That would break her.

"I know you loved her, but you can't spend the rest of your life alone because you regret not saving her." She looked genuine. "You deserve to be happy. She wouldn't have wanted you to be this way."

I turned around as I put on my shoes. I didn't know what to say so I quickly walked out. A million thoughts crossed my mind. Maybe I could be happy. Maybe this could be something. Maybe it was time. Thoughts of Gina flashed through my head. I got with Gina when Clarke had left me, but as I got Clarke back Gina was gone. I was no good for anyone. I was better off alone, incapable of hurting anyone.

A few months pass very slowly. We're trying to figure out how we're going to manage to live for the next few years and how we're going to get back to Earth. The days blend into one another, I've never felt so alone. Monty had Harper, Murphy had Emori, even Raven and Echo had a good relationship with one another. I had managed to push everyone away.

I sat at the edge of my bed with my hands resting in my hands. I don't know how long I'll last at this rate. Would I ever make it back to Earth? I'm interrupted as I hear a knock on my door.

Echo stood in my doorway her arms laid across her stomach. "Can I talk to you?"

I nod patting a spot next to me. She walked in and took a seat next to me. She looked down at her hands fidgeting with her fingers. She completely avoided eye contact. This was unusual considering Echo always carried herself confidently, unbothered by anything and everything. But clearly, the Ark was changing her too. "Is everything okay?"

She finally moved her eyes up to meet mine. They were filled with fear. "I'm pregnant Bellamy." My body went numb as I stared at her, my eyes wide. I kept staring for what felt like an eternity. I didn't know what to say. Maybe this was good for me? Maybe a baby would pull me out of my misery?

I exhale, not realizing I was holding my breath. I rest my hand on hers. "Okay, everything will be okay. Don't worry. We'll figure out how we're going to prepare everything." I force a smile to match hers.

Her smile touched her eyes. She moves forward to wrap her arms around me. I remained calm until she walked out of the room, shutting the door behind her. Tears fell down my cheeks as I thought about what these next few months would be like, what being a father would be like. Would I be able to handle a baby? Would I be able to be there for Echo? Could I love her the way I loved Clarke? I had to. This baby was coming and that's the only thing I was certain of.

A few months pass by Echo's belly is getting bigger. The plan for Echo's delivery was ready, we had a few months to actually put it into action but that was okay. I was starting to appreciate Echo's presence in my life. She had changed a lot since we got onto the Ark. I started sleeping in her room since she didn't want to sleep in Clarke's old cell anymore. I needed to be there in case she felt sick. She was going to be the mother of my child so I needed to take care of her.

One night I walked into our room to find Echo laying on the floor. She was surrounded by blood. I yell for someone to help me as I pick her up and place her on the bed. I check her to see where the blood was coming from. There was no physical wound which left only one other possibility.

I stood above her trying to catch my breath as Raven and Harper stormed the room. Monty pulled me out of the room as Raven and Harper took over. This couldn't be happening. I tried to catch my breath outside.

"It's okay. Everything is going to be okay." Monty patted my shoulder as I bent over trying to breathe.

Raven opened the door revealing Echo's sobs. She gave me a sad nod before I pushed through to see Echo. She was hysterically crying. We had lost the baby. I didn't know what to say so I sat next to Echo and rubbed her head until she fell asleep.

-Back to Present Day-

Everything good in my life always found a way of leaving. On the Ark, I had first lost my mother and later I lost my own child. On Earth, I took many more losses. It was as if everything I touched deteriorated in front of me.

"We lost our baby and all you did was push me away when I needed you." Echo turned around leaving me standing in front of the door.

A sob fills the room. But this sob wasn't coming from Echo. I turned around to find Clarke standing in the doorway. Her eyes filled with anger and pain. I felt frozen as I watched her walk away. She didn't understand. I didn't even get the chance to tell her. I really did destroy everything I touched.