(This is different from the normal crack drabble. We have more of Barricade and Starscream.)
TF Crack-Fic
Toasting Device
Barricade sighed to himself as he leaned back in his chair in his room, an arm slung over the back of said seat, the ex-decepticon's body slack and weak-looking. By no means was Barricade weak, but he damn tired.
After losing the bet to Starscream, Barricade had made plans to make sure the bet wasn't completely fulfilled. Although Megs had broken the television and SS system – including the poor remote – all that was left was the toaster and though it seemed impossible for Megs to screw it up, Barricade knew that the impossibility was out the window. There was a high chance that Megs was gonna destroy the toaster somehow and Barricade couldn't allow it.
As long as the bet wasn't completely fulfilled, it would stand still until one side would win. Barricade intended for himself AND the damn toaster to last the week, if only to save himself the embarrassment of taking Megs on a freaking fishing trip…
Barricade hauled himself to his feet and silently told himself to somehow change human law to make mornings illegal. It was a plan. It was a plan…
"Oi, Megs!" That was Starscream downstairs. Barricade wondered what the hell the first lieutenant wanted with the leader now.
"What is it, Starscream?" Megs didn't sound too happy. Perhaps still mortified over the porn channel? Barricade wouldn't be surprised. He poked his head out of his bedroom door and leaned over the banister of the stairs by his room that led down to the main floor. He looked down with cool navy eyes as the two other men began talking.
"Bonecrusher wants to know what's for breakfast," Starscream said to his leader.
Megatron put his hands on his hips. "He can get whatever he wants and by himself. If he has a problem, he can deal with it."
"Well, actually…" Starscream trailed off for a moment. "He was asking me about how to make toast. You know how to make that, right?"
Megs huffed, now crossing his arms over his chest. While he sucked with other human appliances and couldn't cook much, he definitely knew how to make toast. Starscream then smirked. "Care to show me?"
Megs rolled his eyes before leading Starscream into the kitchen. Fear gripped Barricade as he immediately saw through Starscream's plan. He was gonna make Megs destroy the toaster in order to win the bet.
The used-to-be police car hurried down the stairs, stopping at the end of the kitchen. Starscream turned to his comrade and smirked. Barricade glared.
Megs, meanwhile, was putting slices of bread into the toaster and pushing down the slider. He stood there in the tense silence – unaware of it – while his two subordinates kept staring intensely at one another.
A few minutes passed before the bread popped up and Megs handed it Starscream. "There."
Barricade's jaw dropped. Megs had actually been able to make toast? Without breaking the toaster?! There was NO way…
Starscream had a similar expression. Of all the things, he hadn't expected Megs to be able to use a freaking toaster after he couldn't even handle a hose…
Starscream took a bite of the toast just in case and found it to be good. He stared at his leader while barricade was just on the doorframe, his jaw still down. If it hadn't been attached to his face, it would've hit the floor by now. How in the name of Primus had Megs been able to make toast??
Megs seemed to figure out his subordinates' shock and he smirked triumphantly. "Did you really think I was lower than humans, you two?"
The tow automatically shook their heads. Megs' smirk widened. "Good."
And he turned to make more toast. He hummed a happy little tune while making two more slices of bread into toast. Then the slider thingie didn't pop up like it had before. Megs frowned and jerked the thing upwards, yet the thing was defiant and refused to budge.
In short, the toaster was being a douche, jammed itself, and was now defying Megs' achievements.
Megs growled and applied a little more force to it. Barricade's expression of shock vanished as fear took his eyes and he was at Megs' side in a flash, trying to get the man to clam down and not accidentally break the toaster.
Unfortunately for poor barricade, the leader wasn't listening and he began cursing at the toaster in different languages. He applied more pressure, but the human toasting device began to smoke as the bread inside the thing burned.
Before barricade and Starscream could tell Megs to calm down, the leader had screamed, ripped the toaster by the plug in the wall, and thrown it out the window, shattering the glass, and watching as the smoking device landed in the nearby pond with a loud SPLASH!
Starscream and Barricade blinked before simultaneously turning around slowly to face the huffing leader. Megs then smoothed his hair back, stood up straight, and walked past them without a word.
Barricade's shoulders slumped and Starscream, surprisingly, put a hand on his shoulder. "I feel sorry for you, 'Cade."
Barricade just growled lowly under his breath as Starscream exited the opposite door of Megs and the police car collapsed in the chair.
After all the shit that had happened, Barricade wondered just how Megs was going to handle being stuck on a boat in the middle of a lake with a rod and wire, flicking the pole back and forth and—
Tomorrow was certainly not going to be fun.
Barricade seriously considered running away and hiding with the Autobots wherever they were…
