A/N: This chapter took me days to write. I had a hard time wording things
for some reason... Ugh. Anyhoo, thanks for the reviews and I have lots more
chapters to write and post for you guys! (I'm estimating five to eight...)
I did it. I did. I ate. I couldn't help it; they made me eat. There was no way out...
It was good, too. I had some beef fried rice and cong-pow chicken. They even got me to eat a little ice cream... I hate myself. Why did I let them talk me into it? I was having fun, can't deny that, but every bite I swallowed, slowly sunk to the bottom of my stomach like a lead weight.
*
"Good night," Paige and Phoebe mumbled drowsily in unison.
"'Night," I answered back. It was fun while it lasted, but now I am consumed with guilt and failure after the Girls' Night I spent with my sisters. I have to get rid of this guilty feeling-I have to get rid of this fat in my stomach before it starts to build on my thighs.
I know the solution and I know this solution is dangerous, but it must be done...
*
The water is still and clear although there is a light rim gunk forming just under the water level. I stare down upon the 'throne' meekly. I don't want to make myself vomit. I hate puking; I almost cried the last time I did. The heaving that rattles your whole body is the worst...
I kneel down and slowly peer over the edge of the toilet. I stare down into the gullet of the bowl, still glistening from when I cleaned it days ago on another one of my 'Calorie Burning Cleaning Sprees'.
Don't think about it, Piper. Just do it. You ate and now you have it make it better. Ok, I'll do it, right now--quick and easy. Before I have the time to ponder further, I bring my hand to my mouth and ram my finger down my throat in one swift motion. My shoulders roll painfully forward as I gag over the toilet. Nothing comes up. Don't give up now. You must do this, Piper. You have to make yourself beautiful. You can make yourself beautiful. I take a deep and shaky breath and lean over the throne again, repeating the rapid movement. This time bile fills my throat and mouth.
*
My body shakes with exertion. I have to do it again; not everything came up. After two rounds of shoving my finger down my throat, it's getting easier to induce vomiting. I bring my index finger to my mouth once again but cannot complete the harsh movement as vomit fills my mouth again. As I said, it's getting easier. I don't even have to stick my finger down my throat to get the reaction anymore. Just the thought of that feeling, the hurling, makes me do so. Just the idea of revisiting your Girls' Night feast makes your stomach turn.
I stand up weeping and go to wash out the sour taste in my mouth only to fall down again. I reach my shaking hands up to the sink for support and pull myself up again. Spinning... the room is spinning as I reach out to grab something, anything to catch my falling weight. Pain floods my senses as I look up wincing. My hands automatically move to my head, the source of the pain. My vision blurs as two moving figures enter the bathroom... The coppery taste in my mouth is confusing... I think I blacked out about then.
*
(Our view of the bathroom off the master bedroom: The unconscious Piper lay sprawled on the linoleum floor with a small pool of blood forming around her head where she hit it on the toilet. A small stream of blood flowing from her mouth joins the collection pooling on the floor and her whole body is clammy and pale. Phoebe hovers over her sister's limp body with tears forming in her eyes. Paige stands in the doorway looking on in horror. Both sisters call to their whitelighter and brother-in-law Leo.
Leo orbs in, engulfed with small orbs of white light, looking at first confused and then sharing the sisters' horrified expression. He rushes to heal Piper who continues to lie eerily still on the bathroom floor, shallow breaths of air seeping in and out of her broken form. A warm orange glow pours from his hands over Piper's childlike, helpless face.)
*
Oh, god. They are all here. Give them a reason, any reason. I go to open my mouth but am shushed right away. "Don't speak," I am rudely ordered by a soft voice. I think it's Leo... Can't be sure... I am lifted off the floor and set back down again on something soft; I assume, my bed. Hushed voices surrounded me; I had a hard time picking out the people behind the voices. I couldn't tell Phoebe from Paige and Paige from Phoebe; even Leo's concerned tones were hard to differentiate from my sisters'.
My eyes remained closed; the dim but blinding light from my lamp and heaviness of my eyelids deterred me from attempting to survey my surroundings as a quiet conversation ensued.
"How did this happen?" I can just picture Leo the Wrinkled-In-Concern Forehead.
"I don't know; we came in to say good night again and found her on the floor."
"Yeah, and when we were walking down the hall we heard what sounded like someone getting sick and..."
"...and we picked up the pace a bit and came in to her on the floor with blood gathering around her head."
"So you had no idea?" Pause. "Do you think it was food poisoning?" Good. They don't know.
"No... we had the same things she did. It must be a stomach bug."
"All I want to know is why she didn't call us or you, for that matter. It looks like she puked more than once in there." I can hear the cringe in Paige's voice; it must be Paige.
Sleep finally overtakes my senses, dulling out the pain.
*
I inhale suddenly as my eyes shoot open. It takes me a while to become aware of my surroundings, but as I do, my family, with their super sonic hearing, enters the room and gathers around my bed, the women taking seats on either side of me. I find their sudden interest in me somewhat comical. "So, I am now the center of attention because of a little stomach bug?" No one shares my amusement.
"Piper," Leo starts, taking a step forward, closing in on the foot of my- our-bed, "you were out for six hours. This is not the average 'stomach bug'." Phoebe joins Paige on my right as Leo kneels down to my level on the left. "You've got us worried." I touch the stern crease of age on his brow and follow the outline of his face to his cheek. The hard look on his face hides something that I can only see in his eyes. Fear.
"Honey, I'll be fine. I just had a bit too much 'Girls' Night' for one girl. It's not like I went into a comma."
Paige shifts next to me and notes quietly, "Well, you sure fooled us." What? They thought I went into a comma? They worry too much.
"You worry too much. Hurling takes a lot out of you, not just your favorite Chinese gourmet. And..."
"Piper, this is no time for joking. Six hours ago you didn't look like our sister. You looked so hollow and empty; just a shell of our Piper." Phoebe. She's always the one tossing metaphors around.
"You guys, what counts is that I am fine now and will be fine later on, okay? All I need right now is to get some more rest and maybe have a cup of coffee or something. I know you guys are trying to be a caring and concerned family, but don't make something bigger than it is." Paige and Phoebe's faces fall while Leo prepares to deliver some more wise words.
"Piper, we don't know if you'll be 'fine' later. That's the point. We don't want you to loose consciousness again." He looks at me with pleading eyes. I ask him what he wants from me with my own. "Paige, Phoebe, and I are going to keep an eye on you for a couple weeks, just to be safe. We don't know what you've done to yourself this time, but we really hope we can help you before the effects are irreversible."
Oh God... Have they found me out? Are they messing with my head? They know, don't they! How could they have found out?
A/N: I changed the very end of this one while trying to work on Chapter 10... I think this chapter is the reason for my excessive Writer's Block. We'll see if and how the change helps me.
I did it. I did. I ate. I couldn't help it; they made me eat. There was no way out...
It was good, too. I had some beef fried rice and cong-pow chicken. They even got me to eat a little ice cream... I hate myself. Why did I let them talk me into it? I was having fun, can't deny that, but every bite I swallowed, slowly sunk to the bottom of my stomach like a lead weight.
*
"Good night," Paige and Phoebe mumbled drowsily in unison.
"'Night," I answered back. It was fun while it lasted, but now I am consumed with guilt and failure after the Girls' Night I spent with my sisters. I have to get rid of this guilty feeling-I have to get rid of this fat in my stomach before it starts to build on my thighs.
I know the solution and I know this solution is dangerous, but it must be done...
*
The water is still and clear although there is a light rim gunk forming just under the water level. I stare down upon the 'throne' meekly. I don't want to make myself vomit. I hate puking; I almost cried the last time I did. The heaving that rattles your whole body is the worst...
I kneel down and slowly peer over the edge of the toilet. I stare down into the gullet of the bowl, still glistening from when I cleaned it days ago on another one of my 'Calorie Burning Cleaning Sprees'.
Don't think about it, Piper. Just do it. You ate and now you have it make it better. Ok, I'll do it, right now--quick and easy. Before I have the time to ponder further, I bring my hand to my mouth and ram my finger down my throat in one swift motion. My shoulders roll painfully forward as I gag over the toilet. Nothing comes up. Don't give up now. You must do this, Piper. You have to make yourself beautiful. You can make yourself beautiful. I take a deep and shaky breath and lean over the throne again, repeating the rapid movement. This time bile fills my throat and mouth.
*
My body shakes with exertion. I have to do it again; not everything came up. After two rounds of shoving my finger down my throat, it's getting easier to induce vomiting. I bring my index finger to my mouth once again but cannot complete the harsh movement as vomit fills my mouth again. As I said, it's getting easier. I don't even have to stick my finger down my throat to get the reaction anymore. Just the thought of that feeling, the hurling, makes me do so. Just the idea of revisiting your Girls' Night feast makes your stomach turn.
I stand up weeping and go to wash out the sour taste in my mouth only to fall down again. I reach my shaking hands up to the sink for support and pull myself up again. Spinning... the room is spinning as I reach out to grab something, anything to catch my falling weight. Pain floods my senses as I look up wincing. My hands automatically move to my head, the source of the pain. My vision blurs as two moving figures enter the bathroom... The coppery taste in my mouth is confusing... I think I blacked out about then.
*
(Our view of the bathroom off the master bedroom: The unconscious Piper lay sprawled on the linoleum floor with a small pool of blood forming around her head where she hit it on the toilet. A small stream of blood flowing from her mouth joins the collection pooling on the floor and her whole body is clammy and pale. Phoebe hovers over her sister's limp body with tears forming in her eyes. Paige stands in the doorway looking on in horror. Both sisters call to their whitelighter and brother-in-law Leo.
Leo orbs in, engulfed with small orbs of white light, looking at first confused and then sharing the sisters' horrified expression. He rushes to heal Piper who continues to lie eerily still on the bathroom floor, shallow breaths of air seeping in and out of her broken form. A warm orange glow pours from his hands over Piper's childlike, helpless face.)
*
Oh, god. They are all here. Give them a reason, any reason. I go to open my mouth but am shushed right away. "Don't speak," I am rudely ordered by a soft voice. I think it's Leo... Can't be sure... I am lifted off the floor and set back down again on something soft; I assume, my bed. Hushed voices surrounded me; I had a hard time picking out the people behind the voices. I couldn't tell Phoebe from Paige and Paige from Phoebe; even Leo's concerned tones were hard to differentiate from my sisters'.
My eyes remained closed; the dim but blinding light from my lamp and heaviness of my eyelids deterred me from attempting to survey my surroundings as a quiet conversation ensued.
"How did this happen?" I can just picture Leo the Wrinkled-In-Concern Forehead.
"I don't know; we came in to say good night again and found her on the floor."
"Yeah, and when we were walking down the hall we heard what sounded like someone getting sick and..."
"...and we picked up the pace a bit and came in to her on the floor with blood gathering around her head."
"So you had no idea?" Pause. "Do you think it was food poisoning?" Good. They don't know.
"No... we had the same things she did. It must be a stomach bug."
"All I want to know is why she didn't call us or you, for that matter. It looks like she puked more than once in there." I can hear the cringe in Paige's voice; it must be Paige.
Sleep finally overtakes my senses, dulling out the pain.
*
I inhale suddenly as my eyes shoot open. It takes me a while to become aware of my surroundings, but as I do, my family, with their super sonic hearing, enters the room and gathers around my bed, the women taking seats on either side of me. I find their sudden interest in me somewhat comical. "So, I am now the center of attention because of a little stomach bug?" No one shares my amusement.
"Piper," Leo starts, taking a step forward, closing in on the foot of my- our-bed, "you were out for six hours. This is not the average 'stomach bug'." Phoebe joins Paige on my right as Leo kneels down to my level on the left. "You've got us worried." I touch the stern crease of age on his brow and follow the outline of his face to his cheek. The hard look on his face hides something that I can only see in his eyes. Fear.
"Honey, I'll be fine. I just had a bit too much 'Girls' Night' for one girl. It's not like I went into a comma."
Paige shifts next to me and notes quietly, "Well, you sure fooled us." What? They thought I went into a comma? They worry too much.
"You worry too much. Hurling takes a lot out of you, not just your favorite Chinese gourmet. And..."
"Piper, this is no time for joking. Six hours ago you didn't look like our sister. You looked so hollow and empty; just a shell of our Piper." Phoebe. She's always the one tossing metaphors around.
"You guys, what counts is that I am fine now and will be fine later on, okay? All I need right now is to get some more rest and maybe have a cup of coffee or something. I know you guys are trying to be a caring and concerned family, but don't make something bigger than it is." Paige and Phoebe's faces fall while Leo prepares to deliver some more wise words.
"Piper, we don't know if you'll be 'fine' later. That's the point. We don't want you to loose consciousness again." He looks at me with pleading eyes. I ask him what he wants from me with my own. "Paige, Phoebe, and I are going to keep an eye on you for a couple weeks, just to be safe. We don't know what you've done to yourself this time, but we really hope we can help you before the effects are irreversible."
Oh God... Have they found me out? Are they messing with my head? They know, don't they! How could they have found out?
A/N: I changed the very end of this one while trying to work on Chapter 10... I think this chapter is the reason for my excessive Writer's Block. We'll see if and how the change helps me.
