A/N: Flashbacks are in Italics.
Kara stared up at her bedroom ceiling, praying to Roa that she would be able to go to sleep soon. It didn't help that she was nervous for her first day of school tomorrow. Alex and Maggie had been preparing her over the last six months, teaching her all the weird quirks that was the school system, but she would never feel fully prepared. She accepted that but she would be lying if she said it made her feel any better.
J'onn had been quizzing her relentlessly on her back story; it was so drilled into her head she knew she would never forget it. When she told J'onn exactly that he just huffed his approval telling her that she was ready. That was a month ago, but she could still replay every word. She closed her eyes letting the memory wash over her.
"Name." J'onn said.
"Kara Sawyer Danvers." Kara answered on reflex.
"Good. Parents?"
"Adoptive parents are Alex Danvers and Maggie Sawyer, birth parents died in a house fire, I was at a friend's house."
"How did you come to live with Maggie and Alex?"
"They fostered me for six months then officially adopted me a year ago right after they got married."
"Birth parents?"
"They traveled a lot so I was home schooled. They studied astronomy, which is why I am so good at science and math."
"Good, again."
"J'onn, this stuff is drilled into my head, I've answered every question without hesitation, please, I'm ready."
J'onn stared down at her for a moment before giving in with a small smile, and a nod.
"That's my girl." J'onn whispered. "Go, find Alex, tell her your starting school in the fall."
Kara ducked her head with a smile before running off to find the Agent.
As the memory faded out, Kara sighed, her smile fading slightly. She knew the difference between her fake history and the real one, but that's not what she was scared of. It felt like she was placing herself in this non-existent fantasy world, except it was real. She had Maggie and Alex and J'onn, and they were excellent, caring people who loved her. But she still had that nagging thought in the back over her head that she couldn't replace her birth parents. That she had lost them and it was tragic and sad and she shouldn't be this happy when they just died. She kept reminding herself that she lost them and that she would never see them again. Her heart involuntarily clenching at the thought.
Alex and Maggie reminded her constantly that she was allowed to be happy. That her parents would want that. That they were in no way trying to replace them. But Kara knew that she was becoming more reliant on the couple. That when something went wrong or she wanted to tell someone something really exciting she wouldn't think of her mother or father, she would think of Maggie or Alex.
Throwing the covers off herself, she sat up and rubbed her hands over her eyes. She wasn't even tired, how was she supposed to go to sleep? She turned to her nightstand, and she saw 2:00 am blinking in bright red, she had to be up in four hours.
Grabbing her glasses, she slid herself off the bed and walked over to Alex and Maggie's room, cracking the door, she looked in on the women that took her in. Maggie was turned on her side, one arm thrown over the other. Alex was pressed into Maggie back, holding the woman tightly as her head rested in her wife's hair.
Kara sighed, knowing that it would be better to let them sleep she was about to back out and close the door when she saw Alex shift causing her to pause her movements.
"Kara?" Alex asked sleepily, seeing the girl's silhouette.
"Sorry," Kara whispered, "I'll just go back to bed."
"No, Kara –"
"Alex?" Maggie questioned, lifting her head when she heard their voices.
"Go back to sleep." Alex murmured, giving Maggie a kiss, before pulling herself out of bed.
"Alex, don't – I'm fine." Kara protested, but it was already too late. Alex was out of bed, and pushing her out of the room with a light hand on her shoulder. Alex closed the door quietly behind them, before directing Kara to the kitchen.
She was quiet as she flicked on the dim light above the island, and started getting the materials she would need to make them some tea. Flipping on the kettle, it didn't take long until the girls had steaming mugs of tea in front of them.
"You okay?" Alex asked quietly, as she took a sip of her tea, hissing as the hot liquid burned down her throat. Kara was about to pick up her own mug when Alex put a hand on her wrist lowering it back down to the counter. Getting up she made her way to the freezer, grabbing a handful of ice cubes. "Let it cool down a bit more." Alex said, placing a few ice cubes in Kara's drink.
Kara chuckled, knowing that the drink wouldn't actually burn her, but noted Alex's request.
"Couldn't sleep?" Alex asked, "I used to always fight sleep on the night before the first day of school. I was just so anxious to meet my teachers and see what classes were going to be like."
"Yeah," Kara said, not sure how far she wanted to get into this.
"You're going to do great, Kara. You don't need to worry, you're ready for this." Alex encouraged, trying to find the source of Kara's fear.
"I know, I am, it's just… I feel…" Kara stopped, dropping her head into her hands before raking them through her hair in frustration.
"You can talk to me."
"I feel like I'm replacing them." Kara blurted.
"Your parents?" Alex asked.
"Yes, but not just them, it's like I'm in this wonderful world, with these wonderful people, and I'm so happy." Kara sighed with a side glance at Alex. "It's just, I'm creating this new life without them and I'm moving on and I shouldn't be!"
"Kara, look at me." Alex said, pulling Kara's attention towards her, "When my father died, I felt the same way. I didn't know how to move on until I did. And I found Maggie, and J'onn and everything in my life started to click back into place. I know it's hard, to imagine your life without them, but Kara you don't have to fight it. It's natural, and they'll always be with you in your heart, in your memories. They are with you, okay?"
Kara bowed her head and nodded fighting a losing battle as tears streamed down her face. She felt more than saw Alex lean over and wipe one of her tears away with the pad of her thumb. "You're allowed to be happy, sweet girl. You just have to let yourself."
A suppressed sob escaped Kara's mouth as she leaned into Alex's embrace. Alex had stood up allowing Kara to snake her arms around Alex's middle. The agent closed her eyes as another sob escaped Kara and tightened her grip, whispering tiny assurances into the child's ear.
After a while, Alex felt Kara falling asleep in her arms, her cries now merely little sniffs that sounded every now and then.
"Let's go to sleep, huh?" Alex asked quietly. Kara response was her arms tightening around Alex. "You can stay with us tonight… Come on, let's get a couple extra hours."
Kara sleepily followed Alex back into the master bedroom. Alex quickly got into bed, sliding Maggie over as Kara slide in on the other side. Maggie chuckled as she felt them getting themselves comfortable.
"I was wondering when you two would come in here." Maggie sighed, not opening her eyes.
"Sorry, it took so long." Alex responded, curling herself into Maggie's side.
"So… tired…" Kara mumbled.
"Did you give her your "special" tea?" Maggie asked, placing a kiss into Kara's hair as the girl turned to face Maggie.
"Hey," Alex joked, "It works!"
"One day I'll figure out what's really in that." Maggie said, shaking her head.
Alex laughed, "Nothing that will harm either of you."
"Mm," Maggie hummed, feeling herself fading back into sleep.
Alex and Kara were already out by the time Maggie let her dream suck her in.
Alex walked over to the bar, holding up a finger for a drink. Another shot was placed in front of her but instead of throwing it back like the last two she stared at it, thinking.
She was beyond exhausted, J'onn had thrown her on all these invasion missions and each of them were trying: mentally and physically. But the real reason she was drinking tonight was because she couldn't get that man's voice out of her head. That damn voice.
He was taunting her, she knew that, but what put her on edge the most was that he seemed to know everything about her. He knew about Maggie. And that – that was the reason she didn't hesitate to pull the trigger when he raised his gun at her. It was a clean shot, he would have fired at either her or one of her agents, she acted out of hate and fear. And that scared Alex more than anything.
Knowing that she took someone's life with so much anger. Swirling the tiny glass between her fingers, Alex slowly lifted it to her mouth, she hesitated but ultimately tipped it up letting the burning sensation bring her back to reality.
Alex placed the glass back on the table, raising her hand again for another. She should go home, maybe go to Maggie and let her worries wash away, but she could still feel that anger lingering inside her. And she wasn't ready to confront her feelings on the matter.
His words kept replaying over and over in her head, like a record that never ended. When her fourth shot was placed in front of her, she didn't think before throwing it back.
Darla watched as Alex Danvers threw back her fourth shot of the night. Normally, if a customer wanted to drink away their sorrows she would let them, but not Alex. Reaching for her phone she typed out a quick message to Maggie Sawyer letting her know that her girlfriend was here drinking away her pain.
Not fifteen minutes later, she saw the detective scanning the bar. Darla quickly waved her over.
"How many?" Maggie asked, worry lacing her voice.
"She just downed her fifth."
Maggie sighed, rubbing her forehead.
"Do you know what's wrong?" Darla asked, glancing at Alex.
"No, but I'm about to find out."
Turning around, she easily made her way to Alex, taking the seat beside her.
"Mind if I join you?" Maggie asked keeping her voice low.
Alex shook her head, not looking up from the empty shot glass that she was playing with.
"Want to tell me what's going on?"
"Not really." Alex drawled, trying to delay the inevitable.
"I know you've been on some tough cases lately," Maggie tested, "Does it have something to do with them?"
Alex exhaled, "He knew about you…"
"Who?" Maggie asked, trying to piece something together.
"Thomas Pate." Alex relented, "He was our last capture, and he threatened you, so when he raised his gun with the intent to kill, I put a bullet in his head."
"Oh Alex." Maggie breathed, reaching to place a hand on Alex's back, feeling the woman relax under her touch. "Let me take you home."
"Okay." Alex murmured, before standing up on wavering legs. Maggie quickly took out a few bills placing them on the bar, she gave a nod to Darla, as she wrapped an arm around Alex steadying her.
When they got back to their apartment, Maggie sat Alex down before grabbing a glass of water, "Drink," she whispered, placing the cup in Alex's hand, "all of it."
Alex gave her a wary look before following her instructions.
"Look, I'm going to go, please take care of yourself tonight." Maggie said, fiddling with her keys. The words coming out of her mouth tasted bitter. It was the last thing Maggie wanted to do, leave Alex alone, but she also knew that her girlfriend needed space.
When she didn't get a response of any kind, Maggie nodded her head. "See ya, Danvers."
Maggie was already at the door when she heard Alex speak, "Stay, Maggie. Just for tonight. Please."
Her breath caught in the back of her throat. Tears threatened to form. Alex had a way of taking her breath away, either my words, or touch, even a single look could send her crumbling. They had only been dating a couple of months and she was already in… so deep.
Maggie closed her eyes, inhaling deeply. Just breathe, Sawyer, Maggie thought to herself, just breathe.
"Takeout?" Maggie asked, turning back to face Alex.
Alex gave her a small smile, "That sounds good."
Maggie nodded, matching Alex's beautiful smile. Too deep.
Kara eyes widened as she got out of the car and saw the massive buildings that consisted of her new school. Alex and Maggie stood behind her, taking in the campus that they've only seen a few times but instantly fell in love with. Alex took the lead, walking them through the herds of kids to the main administration building. She easily made her way to the front while Kara and Maggie stood a little further back.
Kara played with her glasses, thankful that they helped block out some of the activity and voices that bounced off the high ceilings. Maggie looked down, watching as Kara started to reach for her mother's necklace. She quickly intercepted the girls hand giving it a light squeeze, "You got this, little Danvers." Maggie whispered, earning a smile and a nervous laugh from Kara.
"Alright," Alex said, as she walked up to them, "You're all signed in. They said someone was assigned to help you learn the campus, figure out where your classes are and so on."
"That's good," Kara said, letting out a long breath, trying to let out some of her nerves. "You won't leave me right?"
"We'll wait until they get here." Alex smiled, trying to hide her own anxiety.
"Thanks."
"Okay, you two," Maggie said, stepping in front of them, trying to break the duo out of this vicious nervous cycle. "We're ready for this, you," Maggie said pointing to Kara, "are going to kill it, and Alex, babe, I know all of this is new but you know better than anyone how prepared she is. There's nothing to be nervous about."
"Oh really," Alex said, raising an eye brow, "Then tell me why you're playing with your wedding band."
"I – " Maggie stopped, talking when she saw a tall girl step towards them.
"Hi," She said with a bright smile, "I'm Lena Luthor, and you must be Kara." Lena finished sticking her hand out towards the Kryptonian.
"That would be me." Kara said, with an uneasy smile, shaking Lena's hand.
"So we have a lot of classes together," Lena said, while comparing their schedules, "So we'll be able to go to those together. The ones we don't, I'll walk you to." Lena turned towards, Maggie and Alex before continuing speaking, "You must be her parents, if you have any question you can ask Mrs. White at the front desk, she knows everything?"
Maggie shook her head, "I think we're good."
Alex nodded in agreement, stepping up to Kara she gave her a quick kiss on her forehead, "Text us during your lunch break. Love you, kid."
"Love you, too." Kara smiled. "See you guys later."
As Kara and Lena walked off, Maggie and Alex could hear them talking about schedules and classes. Kara seemed happy, and that was what matter most to them.
"She'll be okay." Maggie said, bumping her shoulder into Alex earning a small laugh from the agent.
"Yeah, she will." Alex said, "We should get to work, can you drop me off?"
Maggie nodded, her head taking her wife's hand walking them out of Kara's school.
"So," Lena drawled, trying to figure out how to keep their easy banter from dying, "Your moms seem really nice…"
"Oh, they're the best." Kara said excitedly, shifting her book sack to her other shoulder. "I'm just happy they decided to keep me around, I have no idea where I would be without them."
"When did they take you in?" Lena asked, trying to find out as much as she possibly could about the blonde.
"Over a year ago," Kara said, trying to stay cautious not wanting to tell Lena too much all at once. "Um, my birth parents, they, uh, died in a house fire, so Maggie and Alex are all I have left now. I do have a cousin, but he lives in Metropolis."
"Damn," Lena said under her breath, "I'm sorry, Kara. Did Maggie and Alex adopt you?" Lena closed her eyes, that is just not something you ask someone after just hearing their parents passed away. She just couldn't keep herself from asking all these questions, and wanting to know more about Kara, "I'm so sorry, you don't have to answer that!"
"No, it's okay," Kara muttered, gliding a piece of hair back behind her ear, keeping her pace steady with Lena's, "They did adopt me. Like I said, their amazing."
"Well, I'm glad you found them." Lena smiled, stopping in front of a pair of double doors, "Okay, so this is the cafeteria. Prepare yourself." Lena said widening her eyes in faux terror, before breaking into a smile.
As they moved through the double doors, Kara hesitantly followed Lena. Keeping her head down, she tried to best to zone out all the extensive noise of students voices fighting for attention. Alex had made her the lead-lined glasses but they only worked to a certain extent, they helped tremendously but she knew it would take her a minute to get used to the change in volume.
Lena watched as Kara ducked her head, as they walked through the doors of the cafeteria. She knew that Kara had been homeschooled from the information Mrs. White had given her but the rest of Kara's story she was finding out piece by piece from the girl herself. Lena would be lying if she said she didn't want to become friends with the new student, she was interesting and obviously smart based on the classes she was taking. All she could do was hope that her first impression stood out to Kara more that the rumors she would hear floating around.
By the time, they got to the front of the line, both girls fell into that awkward silence that they were desperately trying to avoid. Lena grabbed her tray first, and Kara followed suit.
Lena lead them over to a table in the corner, Kara was thankful because it was at least a little far away from the hordes of people. When they got to the table, Kara noticed a couple of guys sitting there already, but they seemed to know Lena and she seemed to know them as she sat down without uncertainty.
"Oh!" Lena said, causing Kara to quickly shift her focus to the green eyed girl, "Kara this is Winn and James, guys, this is Kara Danvers, she's going to be joining us for this school year."
The taller one, reached over the table sticking out his hand for Kara to shake, "Hi, I'm James Olsen, it's nice to meet you."
Kara was momentarily stunned until she saw is bright smile start to fade from his face, realizing that she waited a little too long, "H – Hi, sorry! I kind of just zoned out there for a minute. Kara Danvers."
"I know," he replied with a light chuckle. "Planning on taking a seat?"
"Of course!" Kara scoffed, quickly plopping herself into a chair.
"Yes, and now that you've met him, I'm Winn." The shorter companion said with a short wave.
Kara smiled at the kid's awkwardness, "Nice to meet you, Winn."
"I like her." Winn claimed, with a cute grin on his face.
Kara ducked her head at the attention, and adjusted her glasses, avoiding the three pairs of eyes that landed on her.
"So, Kara," James spoke, "What brings you to National City?"
"You – you mean, how I got here? Or just – " Kara started to ramble, trying to figure out how to answer without giving away that she wasn't from this planet.
"James." Lena warned, "Ignore him, Kara, sometimes he doesn't know when to shut up."
"Oh, and you do Luthor." James playfully defended.
Kara got wrapped up in the playful banter of the trio, she had to say that she was quickly liking all three of them. Lena had seemed to enjoy her company. James had that charming smile, and was quick on his feet when it came to defending himself. And Winn was Winn with his little inputs, but she defiantly was looking forward to hanging out with them more.
Alex unlocked the door to their apartment and smiled when she saw the scene play out in front of her. Kara was sitting at the island, working on a homework assignment that was due the next day. Maggie was near the stove, chopping some vegetables before throwing them in a bowl. Some quiet music was playing in the background.
It was perfect.
Alex quickly put all her stuff down, hanging up her jacket and placing her motorcycle helmet in its little cubby. She first walked over to the Kara, kissing her head from behind, the girl just tilted her head back and smiled.
"Good day at school?" Alex asked, leaning over the girl to see the assignment she was working on.
"Yup, I'll tell you about it at dinner."
"Come on, not even one hint?" Alex begged.
"Nope." Kara laughed, before switching her attention back to the assignment she was working on.
"Don't feel bad," Maggie soothed when she saw her wife's pout, "I couldn't get her to budge either."
"Well, at least she being fair." Alex smiled, giving Maggie a quick kiss on the lips. "Whatcha making?"
"Tacos."
Alex gasped, before showing Maggie a beaming smile, "My favorite, want me help with something."
"Hell no!" Maggie responded, "Get out of here, before you ruin it!"
"That's just mean, Sawyer." Alex laughed, before walking to their bedroom to change and take a shower.
As the family sat down for dinner, they all enjoyed the stories from their days, just basking in each other's company. They had just finished cleaning everything up when Maggie's phone rang, sighing she took it out of her back pocket, but her brow furrowed when she saw the caller ID.
She gave a quick glance at Alex, making sure she didn't see anything before walking into their bedroom and closing the door.
"J'onn?" Maggie asked, as she answered the phone.
What was he doing calling her?
"Hey Maggie," J'onn said, "I need to tell you something… and you can't tell Alex."
"I don't keep secrets from her, J'onn."
"Well, you'll want to keep this one if you plan on to keeping her and Kara safe."
"What are you talking about?" Maggie asked through gritted teeth as she started to pace the room.
She heard him sigh, "Ali Walker… I think she was involved in the shooting."
Shooting? And then it dawned on her. The shooting that could have taken her and Kara's life if they hadn't been so lucky. It felt like ages ago, and they all had bigger things to worry about rather than the person who shot that bullet the day Kara had crashed to Earth. But J'onn Jones never forgets anything. He must have been working on this theory for months.
"Walker? Our Walker? No way J'onn, she was right next to me, how would I have missed that?"
"I know, okay." J'onn said, trying to sympathize with the detective, "Just come by the DEO and we'll talk. And remember, don't tell Alex, she won't like her second being questioned."
"Fine." Maggie grunted, not liking this at all.
She hung up the phone, and sat down rather heavily on the bed. She hated lying, especially to Alex, but if it would keep her girls safe –
Her thoughts were cut off by a knock at the door, when the door cracked she saw a soft smile on her wife's lips.
"Have to go into work?" Alex asked, already knowing the answer.
"Yeah," the detective responded, plastering on fake smile, "It shouldn't take me long."
"Okay. I think Kara and I are just going to watch a couple episode of Gilmore Girls before going to bed. We didn't exactly get a lot of sleep last night."
"Mm," Maggie hummed, meeting Alex's lips, "I wish I could join you."
"Don't worry about it," Alex said, seeing Maggie's guilt, "You'll be in for the next one."
"Yeah." Maggie breathed, as Alex walked out of the room.
Her smile had dropped as soon as Alex could no longer see her anymore. This was going to tear her apart. How the hell did J'onn expect her to lie to the love of her life? They didn't keep any secrets and that's why their relationship strived the way it did. But she also knew that Alex would defend Ali Walker without a doubt. She trusted her with her life. So Maggie owed it to her to see all the evidence, remain objective, then show Alex the facts whatever they were. And that's exactly what she planned on doing.
A/N: Hey everyone! Please, tell me what you think about this chapter! They probably won't ever be this long again but I just had so much I wanted to get through for this chapter, hopefully I did it justice.
Okay, so I know I skipped a long period of time, but I am planning on adding flashbacks (if you like them) to fill in somethings for that time period (any requests?) and Maggie&Alex's history (also open for requests).
Thanks for reading!
~Iza~
I do not own Supergirl or any of the characters.
