Theodore Remus Lupin
The War had been hard on Tonks. She felt that now, more than ever as she sat in her study and stared at her belly. Remus was out finalizing some details with her mother to keep the baby whilst they were out fighting. Tonks never imagined that the birth of her first child would receive so little fanfare. She had expected a baby shower and owls to come on congratulating her and Remus. Instead they'd had nothing. Remus was sick because he had no idea where Harry, Ron and Hermione were and he was sick because he had no idea if he'd passed his wolf gene along. They hadn't thrown a baby shower because there was a huge risk in having so many aurors and order members in one place at the same time. Tonks had gotten one big letter from the entire order congratulating her, but it mostly felt like she had timed it wrong. Tonks just wanted everyone to know that she hadn't planned it.
It had been a night of much needed passion after the Weasley wedding. Remus had all but attacked her when she got home and after that night it seemed like everything was going well, then she was pregnant and Remus was distant and scared and wouldn't talk to her. And so Tonks sat in her study and stared at her belly. She didn't even know what the sex of the baby was, because werewolves weren't allowed to have children anymore. If she had gone into a healer, they would have been required by law to abort the pregnancy, and that wasn't an option. The one thing she'd had to console herself was the baby's nursery in her mother's house. Remus and she had only been borrowing their cottage, but Andromeda had given her free reign of the old craft room in their home. From the beginning of her pregnancy to now she had spent almost everyday in that little nursery. First she had cleaned it out of all the half finished crafts she and her mother had started. Then she began to paint. She decided to make the room look like a country meadow, so she put down lush pale green carpeting to act as grass and then painted the walls and dreamy sky blue. On the ceiling she painted clouds and birds. In the far corner she painted the sun as a big sunshine yellow circle. That process had taken the better part of 6 months to finish simply because she had wanted it to be perfect. For the last three months she had been collecting light wood furniture to be put in there. She had a crib that could be turned into a toddler bed, a child bed and then a full size twin bed. She also had a light wood changing table and a rocking chair. These were all covered in light green fabrics. She wanted them to feel like trees and so far they all did. Now, with nothing left to do, she started the waiting game. She was actually full term that day and the weather seemed to reciprocate the feelings of everyone around her, sustained indifference. The sky was pale blue, almost gray and it looked like it wanted to rain. Tonks began to contemplate the weather and why it always seemed to reflect her mood. Suddenly she was pulled out of her reverie by Remus rushing through the front door.
"Harry, Ron and Hermione are at Bill and Fleur's cottage. Safe and sound. They got into a bit of trouble but Bill promised me he'd keep me updated on if they are leaving and when."
"Well thank Merlin we know that Harry is alright." Tonks hadn't meant for the words to come out quite as sarcastically as they did.
"Are you angry at me? I thought you'd be elated that he's safe."
"I'm not angry…" she was going to say that she was tired, but suddenly something snapped, "Actually, I am angry! I'm angry that you care more for Harry godamn Potter than you do for me or for your child! I'm pissed that you didn't help me with the nursery or buying clothes or diapers or anything for the baby! I'm also angry that we haven't talked about names and I'm due today!" Tonks screamed at him. Remus stood dumbfounded for a minute.
"Nymphadora, I'm so sorry." Remus sank into a chair, tears falling down his face, "I never meant to…This whole situation scares me so much. I'm in a state of disbelief because I promised myself that I would never love anyone as much as I love you, because in the end nothing could come from it. And then I meet you and I began to break my own rules. I love you so much it hurts and then I get your pregnant and I'm so afraid that he'll be like me. And on top of that, I'm illegal. Our marriage is only sanctioned under God and our friends and the child that we are having is very likely to be hunted and killed if You-Know-Who prevails. I'm so sorry that I'm bitterly afraid that I will lose both of you. And I'm sorry that because of that fear I haven't been here for you." Remus buried his head in his hands and Tonks noticed his back shaking from silent tears.
"Remus, my love. You will never lose us. We are in hiding and I'm sorry that I snapped. I just miss you so much it…hurts. Ow" Tonks grabbed at her abdomen.
"What is it?" Remus suddenly snapped his head in her direction
"I think it's time. Remus, should we go to Mungos?" Tonks looked at him with questioning eyes.
"No, go get into bed, I'm going to get your mother." Remus rushed to the fireplace and called Andromeda. Moments later she swept into their little house and into the bedroom. Tonks' condition had worsened and she was curled in a ball whimpering.
"Nymphadora, lay down on your back, let me check you." Her mother said sternly
Tonks obeyed immediately, hoping beyond hope that her mother would make the pain go away.
"This will be a quick delivery if you follow every instruction I give you. Remus go fetch damp warm towels for me and grab a cool one and when you get back sit my Dora's head and console her if she needs it."
Moments later Remus sat at the head of the bed with Tonks, wiping her forehead whilst watching his mother in law help Tonks have the baby.
"Now Dora it's time to push okay? On three."
After an hour of pushing a squealing angry little person came into the world. Andromeda cleaned the babe off and then kissed her daughter on the forehead and left the room. Tonks was left to stare at the child in her arms. It was clear almost immediately that he was a metamorphmagus due to his hair moving slowly from sandy blonde to vivid red and back again. She looked up at Remus and was surprised to see a look of complete serenity and happiness in his eyes.
"Remus, what should we name the baby? Before we know the sex."
"Ted, for a boy, for your father; and Natalie for a girl?" Remus said looking at the baby.
With a nod Nymphadora peeked underneath the blanket and beamed up at Remus. "Theodore Remus Lupin, welcome to our scary world."
