A/N: Three chapters in one day! I'm so happy. The writing has been coming easily for some reason. Maybe it's cause I have nothing else to do. Hehe well anyway enjoy. :)


"Sollux?"

The silence that follows my proclamation is so loud you can hear a pin drop.

He stands there shifting from foot to foot nervously. He scratches the back of his neck.

"Uh hey Kk...Karkat" I fight down the urge to cry, hug him, punch him, and swallow nervously as the brownies I had earlier threaten to come up.

"Hi..." This is really awkward and I can feel myself shaking. This is horrible. Why do I have to see him? Why does he have to torture me with his presence? It feels like even when he's not hurting me intentionally he's still hurting me.

I feel the tears sting the back of my eyelids and before they can fall I turn and slam the door shut. I slide down the wall and to the floor as I pull my knees to my chest and wrap my arms around them cradling my head and letting the tears fall.

"Karkat?" he says from the other side of the door. I don't respond. I can't speak. I feel like the air is being sucked out of me. It's like just when I think I'm getting better he comes and he ruins everything just with his presence. All it takes for me to break again is seeing him.

"Karkat don't do thith...jutht I'm thorry. Can't you at leatht talk to me?"

"Sorry can't fix him Sollux" I hear John say and it's weird because I didn't even hear him come over here.

"I know that. I altho know that it'th none of your buthineth"

"Please stop" I say getting up. I look at John and he gives me a sympathetic look to which I give a small smile before pulling open the door and stepping out closing the door behind me.

"What do you want to talk about?" I say looking at the ground as I take a seat on the steps. I really don't know what he wants to say because there's nothing to say. He cheated and that's that end of story.

"I jutht really want to apologithe I never thhould have cheated. I thhould have waited and done it right." I stare at him in shock.

"So what you're saying is that no matter what you would've left me for him. The only thing that would be different is that instead of fucking leading me on you would've fucking broke up with me when you first met Eridan and realized that after two years of dating you didn't love me anymore. Is that what you're saying Sollux?" I say just barely holding back tears.

"When you put it that way it maketh me thound like a bad perthon but yeth that'th what I'm thaying."

"You are a bad person!" I shout then lower my voice "It wouldn't change anything. It wouldn't be any better because I loved you...still love you" I chuckle "You broke my trust, my heart, and even worse you broke me" I say letting the tears fall again.

He looks at me then closes his eyes and sighs heavily. When he looks back at me again his eyes are full of concern and before I know it he's pulled me into his lap and he's hugging me close. Against my better judgment I hug him back. I just missed him. I miss the feeling of him against me and it's not fair that someone he only met two years ago stole him from me the person that has basically known him all his life. The thoughts just bring on more tears and I soak his shirt through.

"I know what I did ithn't okay. I know but pleathe don't cry-not over me. I don't detherve your tearth. To tell you the truth I don't think we ever should have dated." I can feel my heart stop at his word. It makes something inside me break. Those were the words I never wanted to hear...not from him the person who meant the most to me. I can tell Sollux knows that he has just said the wrong thing. I push away from him and get to my feet.

"So you're saying none of these years meant anything to you?" I scream at him as he shakes his head and tries to interrupt me but I won't let him. "Don't fucking talk! Do you know how that makes me feel? No you don't because you're not the one that got hurt are you? I can't believe you. I've given you everything and you took it all with you when you left that night leaving me to wonder what I did wrong. To wonder if I could've done something different to make you happy. To ensure that you would still love me even when you met Eridan. I've sat here thinking all of this and now you're telling me we shouldn't have dated."

"Kk there wasn't anything you could do. We never would've worked even if I hadn't met Eridan. In all honesty I never should have asked you out that day..." Those words they swirl around in my head as I stand there tears streaming down my face. They just repeat and repeat and it's the only thing that I hear. I don't notice when Dave punches Sollux or when John carries me back into the house and lays me on the couch. I don't notice when the pizza arrives or when I'm placed in Johns bed because the only thing that registers is the words he said. The ones that are forever branded into my brain. The only thing that comes is that he truly meant his words and that kills me.

I curl in on myself and burrow underneath all the blankets crying myself to sleep hoping this would all just be a dream. Hoping that he didn't really mean and it was all just a big lie.

I'm Karkat Vantas And I May Not Have Been As Broken Before As I Am Now. My Heart May Have Not Been As Shattered As I Thought But If I Know One Thing It's That Now I'm Truly Broken Because Sollux Captor Has Just Said The One Thing I Never Wanted To Hear. That It Was All Just A Big Mistake.