Chapter Seven
A Moment to Think
As soon as he arrived in his room, Michelangelo sat down heavily on the bed.
He placed his head in his hands and clawed at the sides as the words of his brother resonated through his brain.
"You never listen! You never take anything to heart or seriously!"
"You think everything is a joke! You goof around during training! You almost got me killed! And I'm taking no more crap from you!"
"Unless you start to take things more seriously I don't wish to go on patrol with you!"
It bore into his brain like a drill and the tears he had held it started to spill more rapidly. He clawed his fingers down the side of his face and fell sideways onto his bed.
"I thought I knew what I was doing!" he said to himself "No, I did! Those V5 acted dishonourably! It wasn't my fault!"
He rolled onto his back and stared at the ceiling, ten rolled back to face the wall, he never felt so frustrated or even angry in his life, of course he wasn't all Mr Serious like Leonardo when it came to his training, but he knew he was good in a fight! And he genuinely wanted to defeat the V5 in the best way he knew how!
He had fought many Ninja and Purple Dragons, he was proud to call himself a Ninja Turtle, he knew he could fight, and tonight was like any other night, but this time, it had blown up in his face, the Spitting Cobra and Nasty Gila Monster had made it difficult and almost killed Raphael, but Raphael blamed him.
Michelangelo groaned loudly and kicked the wall in frustration then his shoulders shook as he cried, all his emotions pouring out like a spilled bottle of liquid.
Just then, a knock on the door made him jump, yet Michelangelo lay on his bed and turned away, he wasn't sure whether it was Leonardo, Mona or Donatello, or even Master Splinter coming to talk to him, but whoever it was, he didn't want to speak to anyone at all.
"Mikey?" he soon heard Mona's soft voice call through "Mikey?"
Even though his big sister's voice would often either soothe or raise the youngest turtles spirits, Michelangelo kept his back to the door and kept looking at the wall.
"Mikey?" Mona called again, but Michelangelo again ignored her.
"Mikey, Please." Mona wheedled "Just let me in, I want to talk to you."
Michelangelo sighed, he knew how stubborn Mona could be when she thought something was wrong, sometimes she could be worse than Splinter.
"Fine!" he said "Come on in!"
No sooner did he give permission than Mona entered and Michelangelo soon smelt something sweet.
Even though his back was to the Lizard Lady, he could tell she was carrying a plate of cookies and some milk.
Mona walked over and set the cookies on the side table before sitting on the desk chair.
"I can see you're still upset Mikey." She said "I brought you some cookies and some milk, maybe we could have a late night snack and chat?"
Michelangelo slowly turned to face Mona and saw her gentle face, the look of sympathy as well as slight seriousness.
"Hey." She said with a small smile.
Michelangelo didn't say anything, but he acknowledged her presence.
Mona then handed him a glass of milk which he gratefully took and nodded in thanks.
"Mikey." said Mona gently "I'm sorry about what Raphael said, we both know how he can be."
She could see Michelangelo's orange mask was soaked with tears and his eyes were red, she reached across to wipe his tears as they spilled again.
"We both know how he says things in anger which he later regrets." comforted the Lizard Lady "I'm sure once he's out of pain and calmed down, everything will be like it was."
Michelangelo wasn't so sure, after all the harsh words said to him by his brother, it didn't look like the sort of argument they would brush under the carpet like the others.
"He said he didn't want to be paired with me when on patrol." said Michelangelo "if I behave the way I do."
Mona sighed.
"I'm sure he didn't mean it." she said "I am going to talk to him later when he's calmed down, and I'm sure master Splinter will too." she took a sip of milk from her own glass and handed Michelangelo a cookie which he took again gratefully.
"He sounded so serious." Michelangelo sighed "I just...I..." Tears began to brim in his eyes again "I, I never thought he'd say those things...he's said cruel things to me before, even beat me in a temper...but...this...it's cracked me..."
He almost choked on his cookie as he burst into sobs, so much so he could barely catch his breath.
At once Mona got up from her chair and went over to his bed before wrapping her arms around him.
Michelangelo leaned into Mona's chest and shoulder and cried, he almost dropped his milk, but he managed to place it on his bedside table as well as his half eaten cookie.
Mona held her adopted bother close to her as he cried.
Seeing him so upset made her feel sad, he had sobbed in her arms before after a difficult mission or if he or the others had almost lost their lives, but seeing him so upset after Raphael had spoken to him, it made her worried.
"I'm sure as hell going to have a few words with you Raph." she thought, "Once you're calm and out of pain!"
She looked at Michelangelo who was still crying and she began to rock him slightly as well as shush him gently.
"Listen Mikey." she said "You're upset, and you need time to think okay? Despite what Raphael said, you're both okay and alive, and you did your best."
Michelangelo looked up at Mona and sniffled.
"Really?" he asked.
"Yeah." said Mona " I know you, and you'd never allow anyone to get hurt, you're a loyal strong turtle, and I'm proud to have you as a little brother!"
"And I love having you as a big sister!" said Michelangelo hugging Mona hard, almost so hard she gasped a little "Like I said when you first arrived! I always wanted one!"
Mona chuckled and hugged him close again.
As he hugged Mona, Michelangelo began to think. He knew Mona was honest with him, but part of him wondered if she was saying what she said because she wanted him to feel better.
She wasn't there when he and Raphael were fighting Cobra and Gila Monster, so she couldn't give her opinion on it, would she even be saying the words she was saying now if she saw what happened?
"Mikey?" Mona asked "Are you okay?"
Michelangelo looked up at Mona and gave a weak smile through his tears.
"I'm okay sis..." he said "Your words have helped me feel a little better."
That was a lie, he still felt horrible within, despite Mona's comfort, he felt terrible about what happened earlier, and wondered what he could do to make up for it.
Mona hugged Michelangelo again then let go.
"How about getting some rest?" she asked "Hopefully you'll feel better tomorrow?"
"I'll try." said Michelangelo as he slid from Mona's embrace and picked up his glass of milk.
Mona smiled and stroked Michelangelo under the chin before standing up.
"You know you can talk to me about anything okay?" she reassured him.
"I know." said Michelangelo "Thanks again sis!"
"Goodnight Mikey." said Mona smiling at her adopted younger brother before leaving the room.
As she left, Michelangelo sipped the rest of his milk quietly.
He indeed felt a little better since Mona came to comfort him, yet he still felt terrible for what had happened earlier.
Finishing his glass, he climbed into bed and put out the light, he didn't feel like reading his comics or evening playing his video games.
He wasn't sure if he could even get to sleep now with so many thoughts in his head.
"Am I really that much of a nuisance?" he thought "Do my brothers, especially Raph really hate my way of fighting? Am I really an annoyance to them?"
Michelangelo rolled over and faced the wall.
"Does Raph really mean what he says? Do my actions really put him in danger? Or anyone else in danger?"
The more Michelangelo thought about it, he began to think about what he could do to show that he wasn't a goof ball, and that he did take his fighting seriously, but how would the others, especially Raphael see that?
"I can be serious!" he thought "I know I can be! Despite what Raph thinks! I'll show him!"
Oh dear, looks like Mikey's starting to feel he needs to change, wonder how he's going to do that?
Find out dear readers in due course!
