A/N Apologies to everyone. I am in the middle of exams and I really have no free time
Will tried not to think. He did everything possible not to recall Alicia's words. To not feel her lips on his cheek. He worked crazy hours, went running every day, but nothing helped. Every night when he closed his eyes he could see her face, hear her voice and feel her lips.
So, when Diane said she needed him in Chicago for a meeting, he went back feeling both aggravated and excited. Kalinda was waiting for him at the airport. If he was honest, he missed Chicago and the firm. Working with Diane, sharing their thoughts over scotch, waiting for Kalinda to crack a case open. He even missed David Lee's sheningans.
Kalinda being Kalinda picked up there was something wrong. "How is New York?" she asked as she was driving him. "Good." and at her raised eyebrow he added "I am still getting used to it. The new branch, new associates, new judges."
"So you miss us? That's it?"
"Yeah, it feels odd coming back."
"You heard about Alicia's divorce" Kalinda said and it wasn't a question.
"Diane told me."
"Cary says she was doing great until last month. She took a day off and when she came back she was very gloomy."
"Cary says?"
"We have drinks from time to time." Kalinda answered "And don't change the topic."
"What topic?" Will asked mastering his best poker face
"Alicia's trip."
"What about it?"
"Did she come to see you?"
"Cary says that as well?" Will said
"No this is all me."
"Why is this important?"
"Why are you avoiding the topic?" Kalinda asked back
"I am not avoiding anything." Will answered.
"You are not answering, either." Kalinda noted.
"Look, we are here."
Kalinda smiled but decided not to press the matter further. Will would tell her in his own time. In some ways they were both alike.
They rode up the elevator in silence. It was late in the afternoon, so the front desk was quiet. Will greeted a few associates, shook hands with some partners and headed to Diane's office. He paused for a moment and realised he had missed her. Her heels off, her glasses on, hunched over paperwork. As if she felt him, Diane raised her head from her papers and smiled her glorious warm smile.
"Hello." he said solemnly.
"Hello. May I offer I drink?"
"Please do." he said and set himself on her couch loosening his collar, as if nothing had changed. As if he hadn't left. They clinked glasses and went over the agenda for the meeting. They shared stories about cases and employees and gossip. At the end, Diane told him a hilarious story about going fishing with Kurt. He was huddled over with laugher imagining her in boots and ragged clothes. Then they went quiet.
"We are the last ones here." she noted quietly.
Her words took him back to a different night with a different woman and he felt his breath catch.
He must have zoned out, because Diane touched his forearm with a worried look.
"Alicia came to see me in New York. Told me she is in love with me." he said and it was quiet.
"And you?"
"Told her it was too little, too late basically."
"Is it?"
"I don't know Diane. I wish I did."
"Do you intend to find out?"
Will shook his head.
"I cannot go through this roller coaster again." he said
"Can't or won't?"
"Meaning?" he asked her
"I think you both can and want to. But you are terrified and with good reason. Alicia has screwed you over many times."
"And you suggest what? That I dive headlong again and if I crush is no big deal?"
"I am suggesting you are happy and you don't seem happy to me. "
Will pondered her words in silence.
"I am going to need some assurance, like I don't know. No secret affairs."
"You are having a discussion with the wrong person. You are both lawyers, Will. Negotiate. Find the middle ground that makes you both comfortable. That's all this is. Another negotation." Diane smiled
"But the stakes are much higher." he mumbled.
"Says the man who gambled $45,000 from a client's account." Diane teased good naturedly.
Will smiled and turned to her.
"Are there any photos of you fishing?"
The next morning Alicia was the first to arrive in the office. She was on a rough case, but that wasn't her biggest problem. The conversation with Will kept repeating on her mind. Sometimes she just felt like giving up, other times she got stubborn and wanted to fight. She was stuck in between, with many emotions, unable to make a decision.
Cary walked into her office to talk about some paperwork. As he got up to leave he said nonchalantly,"Oh, did you hear? Will is back in town."
Alicia started. "For good?"
"I don't know."
Αlicia was astonished. He was back and he hadn't made contact. So maybe this was sign. She would give up.
She went home that night, luckily the kids were with Peter, drunk a lot and fell asleep.
Next morning she woke up, looked herself in the mirror and told herself sternly. "Ok, today is a new day. You can do this."
She felt encouraged by her pep talk and grabbed her coffee to go. As she was at the door, her phone rang and her heart stopped when she saw the ID. Will.
I am so so so sorry. My postgraduate degree got a bit crazy (10 hours a day, 7 days a week crazy) then I got sick, then I lost my inspiration and then wouldn't let me upload. So again apologies. I will try to update faster I swear.
I started this story as a two- shot so I am not sure how am I doing, because I don't really have a plan in my head. This is why I am begging for feedback. If this gets too unrealistic please let me know.
