They left the Chantry and the city of Val Mort early the next morning.

Neither Nicolas nor Julien felt particularly ready for a march, but the other Grey Wardens were eager to be on their way. They had lingered too long already, they said, and while the darkspawn invasion here might have been quelled, there were more of them roaming the countryside and other places that demanded the Wardens' presence.

"Also", the female elf who had performed their Joining ritual said, "we have lost brothers and sisters as well. We must bring word to our stronghold in Montsimmard, and to Weisshaupt."

Nicolas felt her words like a knife to the stomach. His wound was no longer rancid and the mage Yvain had declared that it would heal now without any further complications, but the elf's words seemed to rip it open again. They had exited the city and the road they walked was surrounded on both sides by grassy fields, here and there dotted by large and blackened funeral pyres – the only testament to the battle fought there only little more than a week earlier.

"Soldiers?" Nicolas asked one of the other Wardens, the white-haired Genevieve. "Or darkspawn."

"Darkspawn" she said with a grimace, not looking at the pyres. "We told the survivors to burn their bodies until they were nothing but ashes, but there were so many and they burn slowly. The soldiers were cremated as well, separately, and their ashes were strewn to the wind by the Revered Mother."

"Oh."

There was nothing else he could say. There were other questions, surely, but none he wanted to ask now, as they walked through this landscape. For a brief moment he wondered if this was perhaps a curse of being a Grey Warden. To fight against overwhelming numbers of enemies and see friends and allies fall, only to rise up the next day to fight the same enemy again and watch it all repeat itself endlessly.

He looked at Julien who walked next to him. They had slept through the night, crammed tightly together in the narrow bed once again, and while Nicolas did not feel very refreshed, at least he felt better. Julien too looked comparatively well, although some paleness still lingered on his skin.

"What are you thinking?" Julien asked as he caught Nicolas's glance at him.

Nicolas shook his head.

"I don't know. I'm still trying to wrap my head around the fact that I'm even alive. So many are not."

He gestured at the fields around them and Julien followed the motion with his eyes, taking in the pyres. No doubt he too remembered the battle, the ceaseless wielding of his weapons as the enemies came crashing down on them and comrades fell at their crude swords and rusted blades.

"I hardly knew them" Julien said. "I don't know if I can mourn them, or even fully comprehend that they are dead."

"I don't think anyone can" Nicolas replied. "A soldier remembers his friends, a lieutenant his company, but more than that? I think it's beyond comprehension."

Even the memory of Alec's crushed body was beginning to fade. Strange, how vivid it had been and how soon it faded away. The loss though… that was real. That, he remembered.

"We can fight" Julien pointed out.

"Yes" Nicolas agreed. "But I won't fight because of the lives lost here. I don't feel the need to exact revenge."

He might have, he thought, if Julien had not been walking next to him now. Then it might have been personal. Now…

"Are you saying you will be fighting for a greater cause?" Julien asked, the hint of a smile in the corner of his mouth. "Where have you hidden this champion for the greater good, and why has he emerged now?"

"Ha ha. I'm not a hero, and I don't think I'll ever be. I'm a warrior, yes, but a soldier first. I think… I think a war that never ends suits me."

"How lucky you are."

Nicolas caught the humor and thought for a moment to respond with another joke, but did not. Instead, he stopped and caught Julien's wrist, causing him too to stop.

"I am" he said, meeting the other man's surprised gaze. "I am very, very lucky."

Julien's expression softened and he nodded. Then, without another word, they both continued down the road, side by side among the other Grey Wardens, to whatever fate the Maker had in store for them, together.


A/N: Greetings everyone! Thank you so much for tagging along on this journey! It took some time but we got to the end of it, eventually. However, should you feel that you have not had your fill of Nicolas and Julien, there will be a couple of additional fics uploaded, more closely connected to the book. If you want to be alerted when they are available, please add me to your list of authors to follow. (Or, if you want to make me all blushy, add me to your list of favorite authors - that will do the trick as well!)
Again, thank you for reading this small trilogy fanfic, and I hope to see you soon again!