DISCLAIMER: I DON'T OWN HxH.

Chapter 7: A Nightmare.

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"Mama... Pa- Papa?"

The horrifying scene crushed his bloody sight. The rotten smell whipped his stomach, he badly wanted to throw up. The gore sight brought a hell atmosphere, the gross was getting under his skin, reaching for his crumbling heart. He could feel his tears running down his cheeks, a drop fell on the edge of his bleeding, shaking lips. He gritted his teeth and intentionally bit his lips, hoping he was just having a terrible nightmare. And for the first time in his life, he wished his five senses to stop working. The taste of blood and tears. The smell of decaying flesh. The sight of the numerous lifeless corpses. The dead air was lingering around, touching his skin. The suffocating silence of the once bountiful, busy and noisy place. This was too much for him to understand. He didn't understand. He never wanted to understand. Everything was too much for him to take. Too much. And he could no longer stand it.

His heart was screaming out with pain and regret along with his throat. He was calling out the names of his fellow tribesmen as he roamed this living hell. Tears were pouring down from his eyes. He stumbled as he tried to avoid tripping and looking on the dead bodies around the place, with the worst-looking injuries one could ever imagine. The news was indeed horrifying, but to see the tragedy itself was a first taste of hell. He loathed his sharp memory for the first time as he horribly recognized everyone. He loathed himself for leaving them for a while, then what greeted him when he got back was this. He loathed the thing that was happening. He loathed his eyes to the core, for the very first time.

Everyone's eyes were hollowed. On the very center of the village, were bunches of corpses. His world came crashing down to his feet. Bodies of children, some were the same of his age, while some were younger, were aligned. Their bodies were cut, slashed, beaten and struck on their most vital points. One could not imagine what kind of pain those injuries could bring on a living being, especially on those poor children. He ran to the bodies, but he halted when another thing hit him. He had to cover his mouth and nose due to t he rotten smell. More bodies were scattered in front of the kids'. Horrified expression were left to their faces, but with the absence of their eyes. And at the far-end of the line, another thing totally drove his sanity away for a moment.

He couldn't bring his feet to walk further. He didn't want to see it. He really couldn't. This was impossible. There was no way in hell they would just leave him behind. Here. Alone. There was no way. NO.

He forced himself to take a step. Slowly, he took another one. Then again. And again. Shaking, he reached a spot. Two familiar figures were lying with their faces on the ground. More tears shed his cheeks. His Crimson eyes grew brighter. His heart was filled with dread. Weakening, he walked near the two figures, one was a woman with blond hair. Another was a man with black strands. He keeled to them, murmuring.

"Mama? Papa?"

He reached for the figures' shoulders. They were hard and cold, he could feel them no matter how thick their clothes were. Slowly, he turned them to face him. His eyes widened. He almost faint.

Deep wounds. Terrified faces. Hollowed eyes.

"NOOOOO!"

Kurapika jerked awake by his own voice. His eyes were scarlet. His clothes were drenched with his sweat. He was catching his breath and clutching his chest, feeling like his heart was pulled out of it. It took just a fraction of seconds to remember what just happened. A nightmare... again.

"Kurapika?"

A soft voice called out from his room. Due to the nightmare's after shock, it took Kurapika some moments to recognize the voice's owner.

"Come in, Senritsu," he tried to collect himself despite the thought that his fellow worker would definitely ask him what his scream was all about. Dreading of recollecting his thoughts about the nightmare, he watched as the door opened and Senritsu emerged from it.

"Kurapika, are you alright?" quite forgetting to greet 'good morning' (which sounds a bit nonsense since Kurapika didn't looked good at all), the small, brown-haired girl inquired the Kuruta.

The blond boy, meanwhile, just heaved a sigh as he let his hand fall to his lap after clutching his chest. He felt so weak.

"Nightmare again, I suppose?" Senritsu tried to get the matter out of Kurapika's hands, as the boy didn't seem to eager to open the topic. The Kuruta, on the other side, curtly nodded and looked at the window beside his bed. The sun was brightly shining outside, showering warmth all over the place.

"Five consecutive days... Same images. I wonder what's going on with me..." Kurapika weakly buried his face on his hands, shoving his blond locks out of it.

"Kurapika, you've been working hard for the past few weeks, no wonder why it's taking its toll to your body. Your heart beat sounds really unstable. Just like when you had fever back there on York Shin. Take some rest, please. Don't push yourself too much," the kind woman advised with her utmost concern.

"You know I can't, Senritsu," Kurapika unintentionally countered.

"But think of it. What if you pass out again just like before? You don't even eat properly nowadays. You just like... killing yourself slowly and in a very painful way..."

"I'm sorry for making you worry again, Senritsu. But really, I'm fine. I was just badly woken by my usual nightmares. I can live with them, really," Kurapika convinced Senritsu... and himself.

"Kurapika-"

A shriek broke Senritsu's sentence. She and Kurapika bolted up and gestured each other to go out from the room. The Kuruta climbed off from his bed and left most of his thoughts there, as his boss' scream made him fully awake.

It was been a while since he went outside of the country when he and Senritsu accompanied his boss, Light Nostrad and his daughter, Neon. It was then when they found out that Neon's nen ability, Lovely Ghost Writing, which had brought fortune to her family, suddenly vanished. Out of misfortune, it was lost after Kurapika acquired a really expensive merchandise from an auction in York shin. A pair of Kuruta eyes. It cost millions. and it made the Nostrad's fortune to disperse instantly. Last week, he received a call from his friend, Killua, saying that the Spider head that he restrained from using nen, was actually looking for some nen remover to get rid of the restriction he placed upon the leader's heart. It didn't made Kurapika anxious or whatsoever. He was more preoccupied now with his employer's big problem. Right after Killua's call, Kurapika was called by Light Nostrad next. He wasn't surprised when the man almost cry in front of him out of anxiety about Neon's nen ability's sudden lost. That helplessness actually gave Kurapika what he really wanted, an upper hand and a steering wheel to maneuver the situation. The boy felt so honored when Mr. Nostrad asked him of what to do next. The chance he'd been waiting for.

The shriek turned into a crying fit when Senritsu and Kurapika reached the room where the sounds came from. They were made by none other than the spoiled, self-centered daughter of his boss. Neon was throwing everything away from her bed. Mountains of junk foods and snacks wrappers could be seen around. It wasn't clean like before, as there were no more maids in the huge mansion to clean them up. Neon, with her puffy eyes, suddenly turned her mattress upside down. Then she slumped it back on the bed and bent down, poking her head under it then pulled back after some seconds. She scratched her head before turning back as she heard Kurapika asked. "Is there any problem, Miss?"

"Is Daddy over there?" she gestured outside.

"No, we haven't seen him," Senritsu answered.

"I'm dead..." she murmured while cupping her face with her hands.

"What's the matter?" Kurapika asked again.

Neon looked straight to Kurapika with her puppy eyes. As she slowly let her hands fall, she uttered. "The Kuruta eyes. They are... missing."

"WHAT!?" Kurapika screamed, which made the other occupants of the room to jump a little. Meanwhile, the boy's heart sank. "What the hell do you mean!?" he blurted out, ignoring the girl's surprised and confused look.

"I don't know!" she weakly responded. "I really don't know! Last night before I sleep, I kept them on my vault," She pointed her vault that was placed on her bed side table. "I'm pretty sure that I safely put them on there! But when I woke up and opened it, it's already gone..." Her voice sounded like she was about to be mad.

Kurapika immediately paced to the vault. He lingered his eyes on it, noting that the vault's door was ajar. Thinking that the girl must just playing a nasty joke on them, he opened it. But only an empty space was seen on the view. The Kuruta then reached the vault's lock and examined it with his hands, checking if it was opened by force. Noting that the lock was still functioning, he resorted to his last phase of examination. The boy summoned his aura and focused them on his eyes. Ana as Kurapika used gyou, he sensed nothing. The Kuruta eyes must at least release some faint aura, as Kurapika believed that Kuruta eyes must hold some nen on them. But he couldn't feel anything at all except Senritsu's aura. His heart sank even lower, and before he could stop himself, he heard his own voice screaming.

"What the hell have you done! Where did you misplaced the eyes!" he turned back to Neon and Senritsu.

"I-I told you! I placed them inside the vault! I didn't-"

"Then you should have asked for me or Senritsu's help to add more security for it! Are you that careless? Do you have any idea of how important those eyes are? Are you even thinking!? You know that it's the only one remaining fortune that you and your father have! You know how important and sacred those eyes are! And you just lost them!? YOU'RE UNBELIEVABLE!"

"Kurapika!" Senritsu broke off when Kurapika had done it. Neon was taken aback by the blond's uproar, the she started crying harder.

"I'm really - hic!- sorry!" the girl sobbed as she wipe her own tears. "I'm really really SORRY! I - hic! - didn't mean to lose them! I know it's my fault, I didn't - hic! - take good care of them! I don't know what happened but - hic! - I never wanted to lose them!"

Senritsu pacified the crying girl by patting her back gently and handing her a handkerchief. As Neon wipe her tears with the piece of cloth, the music hunter shot a warning look at Kurapika. The Kuruta became aware that his eyes abruptly turned to scarlet. He ran one of his hand over his forehead and closed his eyes. He turned his back as well, trying his best to regain himself. It took almost a minute, but Kurapika forced himself to turn around again as he heard another voice.

"Neon, dear. What happened?"

Light Nostrad had't even reached the bed when Neon ran to him. She broke into more of crying when she buried herself on her father's embrace.

"Daddy! The Kuruta eyes... They are missing! I-I think I lost them! I'm really sorry..."

Mr. Nostrad's eyes widened with that unexpected bad news that morning. His face was drawn with grief and disappointment, as though he already lost everything in his life. He actually loosened his hug to her only daughter, Kurapika somehow thought that he would push Neon away and scold her just like what he did earlier. Light Nostrad stroked Neon's back and said, "It's alright, my dear. We will look for it. Stop crying..."

Kurapika didn't wasted anytime. He lunged himself to the bathroom, trying to look for them. He focused his aura on his eyes again. The Kuruta had his gyou on almost the whole day as he and Senritsu with Neon and her father tried to search the mansion.

After crying a lot and eating her dinner, Neon finally fell asleep. Mr. Nostrad, meanwhile, looked dead on his feet. Senritsu was tired as well, but no one looked so awful than the last survivor of the Kuruta clan. Senritsu had been convincing Kurapika to stop looking for the missing eyes for a while to take a break, adding that he hadn't eaten anything for the whole day. But the music hunter herself knew the she couldn't stand on Kurapika's was. Midnight fell, and everyone in the mansion was already asleep except for the blond who was sitting still on his bed, with his bright eye wide open. He was already feeling dizzy and his stomach was grumbling uncomfortably, but Kurapika didn't care. He had been working on finding information about the Kuruta eyes' whereabouts, having a deep encouragement from the first ever pair of eyes the he had managed to acquire. Though technically, the eyes were not his, that pair gave him the confident that if he would work harder, he would eventually get all of the pairs. He didn't stopped nor lazed around ever since they left York Shin. He decided to set his mind solely in search for the 36 pairs of Kuruta eyeballs after his ordeal with the Genei Ryodan, after beheading the Spiders when he restricted Kuroro Lucifer with his Judgement Chain. No matter how tired he was, Kurapika did his best to gain more information and helped his boss out from total bankruptcy.

But tonight, he felt useless. As though all of his efforts was wasted as the first pair of the Kuruta eyes had gone, to think that it was kept on the same place where he was staying everyday. Kurapika couldn't help himself from feeling weak. He was blaming himself for being so careless. He was raking his own head, thinking of any reasonable theory of how the scarlet eyes suddenly vanished from the vault, as Neon said.

'Now, I have to start from scratch again,' Kurapika thought as he brought his hands to his head to cover his eyes and to massage his dizzy head, hoping that it would cease the nausea at least a bit. Aside from being so stressed, his excessive use of his eyes (his eyes were already scarlet ever since he parted from Neon and her father in search for the eyes in the whole mansion, which was in the late afternoon) was taking its too to his body. He felt so restless. He wanted to slump his back on the bed and drift his anxious mind to sleep. But he was scared to have another nightmare. He had been suffering from nightmares before, but he didn't think he could do it tonight. Another nightmare might finally drive Kurapika's brain to madness.

Then he badly remembered his past as the horrible images of his nightmare wavered him. Lifeless corpses with their hollowed eyes of his clan mates never failed to shatter his heart again and again. It never failed to leave his wounds painfully open, wounds that that made his existence until now to be reasonable. Wounds that nothing and no one could ever heal.

Regret. His wounded heart was filled with nothing but regret. He suddenly asked why, of all the people in t his world, he was the one who was left behind by his beloved family? Why was he alone in this cold world? How could his family and friends... How could his parents do this to him? Why did they bounded their pain and wrath to him alone? Of all the people, why was him?

Was it because he was a stubborn and reckless kid when he was young? Was it because he was so persistent to go outside his homeland back then? Was he being punished now because he wasn't contented in his quiet and peaceful life inside Rukuso Province when he was young? Was it a sin to wonder what the world outside his village had? Was it wrong to be curious? Did he really deserve to be punished? Did he really had to suffer like this for what he had done when he left home?

Home. He wondered what might happened if ever he didn't left his home. He wondered if he just became honest with that test he took to be allowed to get outside back on Rukuso. If he just failed that exam, then maybe he was with his clansmen's souls now, wandering for justice.

He was not there to help the others to defend their hometown. He was not there to protect his love ones. He was not there to tend their wounds. He was not there to see how they died in vain from those evil monsters. He got no idea back there how his family died just because they got beautiful eyes. He was absent on the most terrible day of his clan, when his presence was badly needed.

Selfishness. If he was not a selfish brat before, then maybe he was not suffering now. Look what selfishness brought t him. Yes, he had no idea how his kins experienced hell before death, but he was suffering hell while still breathing for almost 6 years. A homeless, wandering survivor of the Kuruta clan. Chasing after revenge and justice and seeking for the sacred eyes of this fellowmen. If it was worst than seeing your family being tortured before you die, Kurapika didn't know.

And for the first time, Kurapika doubted his objectives in life. He doubted himself. Could he really take down the Genei Ryodan? Could he really regain all of the Kuruta eyes from the greedy hands of the wealthiest men on the world? Could he really seek justice for his clan alone? Could he really fight by himself against this dark world until the very end? Did he really stand a chance in the very first place?

Kurapika mentally slapped himself very hard. What were those ideas all about? Where the hell those thoughts came from? Did he just suddenly thought of giving up? Forgiving and forgetting were so far from his heart. He could never forgive those evils from killing his family. He would exact revenge for them no matter what happen, and by any means of necessary. He would still fight even if it would be the last thing he will do. That was his only reason for living. Come to think of it, t was the destiny itself who chosen him to be the one to survive. The fate told that he was chosen, for he could be strong enough to stand alone until the end. He was the only one remaining Kuruta, and it was his responsibility to take revenge from the murderers of his extinct clan and to regain all of the eyes back. There was no time and space for giving up.

The without any warning, a pain shot in his head. He clutched his forehead as the sting stayed there longer. Then another soreness woke him up from his muse as his back and stomach ached. The he realized how tired he was.

That was it. Maybe the reason why he was having those kind of doubts was because he was exhausted. Not enough sleep and improper meal time was taking its toll. He was really stress. He simply didn't have to sleep. He badly needed to get rest, mentally and physically. Closing his eyes and concentrating to bring them back on their normal hue, Kurapika took off his outer garments. Since he had to start from the scratch as soon as possible, he decided to give what his body was asking for. He couldn't just give up because he was tired. He had to take enough rest and strength to endure more stress. There was nothing he could do regarding the lost eyes. A part of him actually said that he hadn't landed his hands on any pair of the eyeballs. Finally setting aside his fear from his nightmares, Kurapika laid his back on the mattress. Another journey had to get started by tomorrow, he thought. Thinking of where he could start his search, the blond Kuruta eventually drifted his mind to the darkness, as he fell to sleep.

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P.S. Yokaaaaaaaaaatta! At last! whoa! I thought I will never finish this damn chapter!

Okay girls... don't pout. Yeah, NO FLUFF AT ALL. First thing, I want to say sorry for the late update. I was having a... turmoil... nowadays (regarding the pair... oh please don't ask anymore!) and I was feeling SO lazy to type this part. Maybe because it got no romantic scene at all.

Second: something to pout again. The next 4 loooooong chapters got no fluffs as well. I mean, I have to justify this fic! I have to explain to everyone how come this fic happen in the first place! I have to introduce to you my OC's as well. Those part are not that boring, they are essential to the story. But I really dunno why I'm feeling so lazy to type *aside from the fact that I got no money anymore and I'm always busy! SO busy!*

But on the brightest side... I came with a crazy chapter. Kurapika and Kuroro's date on a mall. Yeah! I was LMFAO so hard after writing it! Though I want to revise it again to add some more things (I'm revising the other long chapters before that... Curse Kurapika's past!)

So... another spoiler! Ladies, I want you to join me as I stalk the famous, Chain Pair doing shopping, and let's see how the darkest pair of Kurapika and Kuroro deal with bras and thongs, Hello Kitty and DANCE DANCE REVOLUTION! *I was thinking hardly about that part. Dance Central on XBOX 360 is not bad... But I can't imagine Kurapika dancing 'I'm sexy and I know it!' Gaaah! *snickering*

You WANT that? Then help me and donate a PC or give me money to rent on the shops... OR PUSH MY LAZY ASS HARD! Don't forget to REVIEW! Yeah, it can do some magic!