A/N: Evy's fourth birthday is a bumpy ride.
"Unca Baby, I sowwy."
Bobby looked up from his work on the desk, taken aback by the unsolicited apology. "Sorry? Sorry for what?"
"Well, I was paying with the ball that Daddy gotted for me. I was frowing it and twying to wun and catch it. I frowed it too hard and I cwacked a window on you twuck." Evy said, not looking at Bobby, fearing his reaction.
"You what?"
Bobby got up and went outside to check out the damage. Evy followed, hanging her head and paying close attention to her feet. Bobby could have laughed. The 'crack' Evy had told him about was a barely visible crack on the corner of his driver's side window. He made a very concentrated effort to keep his face straight and serious. He bent down in front of Evy and asked,
"Were you aiming for my truck?"
"No, sir. I was aiming for the 'teps on the powch and I fwoed too high. I sowwy." Evy said. "Is you mad at me?"
"Not even a little." Bobby said with a smile.
"You's not mad? Even dough I boked you twuck?"
"I can fix it. And even if I couldn't, you told me the truth. Good girl." Bobby said, kissing her cheek. "You ready for lunch?"
"Can we has mac and cheese?"
"I don't see why not." Bobby said. "Come on, you can help me make it." Bobby took her inside, and as he waited on the pasta to finish cooking on the stovetop, he asked, "So what do you want for your birthday?"
"Nuffin." Evy said.
"You don't want anything?" Bobby asked, surprised. Evy's birthday was in less than a week and he had been tasked by John to find out what she wanted. "Not a party? A present? Nothing?"
"Nuffin." Evy insisted.
If Bobby hadn't known better, he would have sworn Evy was trying to mimic her father's 'this discussion is over, the answer is no' tone. The problem was, as far as Bobby knew, she hadn't heard that tone, at least not since she'd literally dropped from heaven and ended up in John's garage. Evy did seem to have an exceptional memory, remembering things about her mom that seemed unusual for a three-year-old to remember after so long.
"Baitfish, you okay? Is something bothering you?"
"I not wanna talk about it." Evy said.
Yeah, that's not suspicious at all. "Baitfish, what's going on? It ain't like you to not talk."
"Unca Baby, pease. I just not wanna talk about it."
"Okay." Bobby said, deciding not to push it, at least until John got home. "You want a hot dog too?"
"Yes, pease."
"What you want on it?" Bobby asked.
"Kesup and mussard."
Bobby tried to get back to work, but Evy's mood had taken a downward turn. She didn't go back outside to play, instead choosing to get a few of her books out of her room and look at them on the couch. Bobby wanted badly to ask her again if she was okay, but the one time he tried she surprised him even more.
"I going take nap, unca Baby. Night night."
Of all the mysteries Bobby had solved in his life, this one took the cake. Evy didn't want a birthday, wouldn't talk about why when every other day she was an open book, and, what really concerned him, she willingly took a nap when she'd rather eat paper than sleep. Bobby went to check on her a half hour later, and found her hugging her stuffed unicorn Barney tightly to her chest, sucking her thumb. But what worried him most was the tear tracks going drying on her cheeks. She'd fallen asleep crying.
"What's the matter, Baitfish?"
Bobby decided to let her keep sleeping, and present the problem to Sam, Dean, and John later that night. It amazed Bobby how one little girl could stump four grown men, but she was a master at it. She had been in a good mood that morning, playing like normal, but had turned after Bobby asked about her birthday. Could that be it? John came home a couple of hours early, so Bobby told him about the conversation earlier in the day.
"She doesn't want anything?" John asked. "Not even a cake?"
"No. I don't know what to make of it. As soon as I asked her, she clammed up and stopped talking."
"Hmmm." John said. "Do you think we should do something anyway?"
"I think we should find out what's bothering her first." Bobby said.
"How?" John said. "She's not exactly easy to crack when she clams up like that."
"Get Sam to talk to her when he gets home. He's always been good at figuring stuff like this out."
"Good idea."
Evy woke up a few minutes later, but was as tight lipped with John as she'd been with Bobby. She wouldn't talk to Sam or Dean either. As he put her to bed that night, John couldn't help it. He had to know what was clearly bothering her.
"Little one, I know something's bothering you. Will you please tell me about it?"
Evy bit her bottom lip. "I not want to hurt you feelings, Daddy."
"Why would it hurt my feelings?" John asked. "Is it about your birthday?"
Evy nodded. "I only want one fing for my birfday but I can't have it."
"How do you know?" John asked. "Come on, tell me what it is."
"You can't do it, Daddy. No one can." Evy said, looking down and picking at the hair on Barney's mane.
John would regret his insistence. "Come on, tell me."
"I wanted mommy to come." Evy said quietly.
John sighed sadly and noticed that Evy's bottom lip was shaking. "Oh, little one…"
"I wish I could give all my toys and stuff back if it…" Evy started to say, but couldn't finish because she had to wipe her eyes. "I just wants my mommy to be there. I don't want to make her sad."
"Why do you think your mommy would be sad if you had a birthday party?" John asked.
"Because she said it made her happy to be there for my birfdays. If she can't be there, she be sad." Evy reasoned.
"Oh, little one, I promise your mommy wouldn't be sad if you had a good time for your birthday. It made her happy for you to be happy. It made her sad when you were hurting, or sick, or scared and she couldn't make you feel better. Does that make sense?"
"So she wouldn't be sad if she can't be there?" Evy asked.
"No. I promise she wouldn't be sad." John said. "But, if you want, while we have your party, we can send your mom a present too."
"Weally? How?"
"Do you remember what your mom used to say about balloons?" John asked.
"Yeah. They makes you happy no matter how sad you is."
"That's right. So this is what we'll do. I'll get a dozen balloons Saturday and we'll blow them up. We'll tie them with string and during the party, we'll go out in the backyard and let them float up to your mommy." John suggested. "What do you think?"
"Will she get 'em?"
"Where do you think balloons go when they get released and you can't see them anymore?" John asked.
Evy's eyes bulged. "They goes to heaven?"
"That's right." John said with a smile, rather proud of his improvisational skills.
"Can we send her balloons on mommy's birfday too?"
"Sure. Her birthday's still a way's off, but sure." John promised. "You want a party now?"
"You bet I do!" Evy said, the prospect exciting instead of dreadful now.
John laughed. "Okay. You can talk to uncle Bobby about it tomorrow. Right now, you get some sleep."
"Daddy? You fink unca Baby would let me pant some fowers?"
"I think uncle Bobby would give you the moon if you asked for it." John said. "Why do you want to plant flowers?"
"For mommy." Evy said. "I want to pant those pink fowers she wiked so much."
"Roses?" John asked. "That's a big job. Are you sure?"
"I's need hep gettin' started and stuff, but I can keep them watered and keep them lookin' good."
"Okay. I'll talk to uncle Bobby about it. I can't promise, 'cause I don't know how well roses grow here. But we'll see." John said.
"Tank you, Daddy." Evy said with a yawn. "I's go seep now."
"Okay. You feel better?" John asked.
"I feels better."
"You sure? It's not like you to want to go to sleep." John said.
"The fasser I go seep, the fasser I can hep wif my pawty." Evy explained.
"Alright. Lay down." John said. Evy did, John read her a story, and a few minutes later, she was sleeping peacefully. "Good night, little one." John walked out to the living room, where everyone was still waiting to hear what was wrong with Evy. "Bobby, you can talk to her about the party tomorrow."
"Did you find out what was wrong with her?" Dean asked.
"Yeah. She thought Missy would be unhappy if she couldn't go to the party, so she wanted to skip it so she wouldn't upset her mom." John explained.
"Why wouldn't she tell me that?" Bobby asked.
"She said she didn't want to hurt my feelings because I couldn't bring Missy to the party." John said.
"How'd you convince her to have the party?" Sam asked.
"I told her we'd get some balloons and release them." John said.
"What's that gonna do?" Dean asked, at the same time Sam said, "Dad, that's awesome!"
"Don't you know, Dean? Balloons go to heaven when you can't see them anymore." John answered.
The next three days brought about an all new Evy. She was so excited about turning four, what she called a 'big girl age', that she practically vibrating. The morning of the party, Sam surprised her with a new dress, warning her that she could play outside but 'keep the dress clean until after the party'. Evy took Barney outside for a walk as John, Bobby, Sam, and Dean decorated the living room. As Evy walked around the house, singing and humming to herself, she wasn't paying attention. She bent down to try and watch a butterfly on a flower, but when it flew away, Evy turned to go back towards the porch. She stopped when she heard a scary sound. When she turned around, there was a dog there, one she'd never seen before. It stood about as tall as Evy, and was baring his teeth at her.
Dean struggled in the kitchen hanging Evy's birthday banner. Bobby was inserting four birthday candles into the birthday cake John had picked up at the grocery store. John was pulling the baked spaghetti out of the oven he'd made for lunch. Sam finally stopped laughing at Dean and helped him hang the banner. Just as he was about to go outside and check on Evy, a bloodcurdling scream from outside made all of them tear from the kitchen and run outside.
At first, they didn't see her. Sam was the first one to spot it. Fur and teeth and snapping jaws. John, Dean, and Bobby followed suit. It took two seconds, both of which seemed to drag on and on, for Bobby to realize what he had to do. It took four more seconds for him to run inside, grab his rifle, come back out, and aim. Bobby took one breath, prayed he wouldn't hit Evy, and shot. The dog was hit square in the chest, squealed, fell over and died. John raced over to a still sobbing Evy, who was trying to push herself up and it wasn't working.
"Little one, what happened? Are you okay? Where did he hurt you?"
"He bited me." Evy shouted. She was shaking, crying, and coughing.
"Let me see." John said. "I know you're hurting and scared, but I need to look at you. Okay?"
Evy stayed as still as she could, but everything hurt. The dog had scratched her, bitten her, and her arm felt like it was out of place. Her ear was still ringing from the gunshot. Sam held her as Daddy looked at her. Bobby and Dean dragged the body of the dog away. Evy heard Bobby grumbling to himself.
"Damn Nicholson. This is his dog."
"You know this dog?" John asked, still checking Evy over.
"Yeah. It's the neighbor's down the street. It's never been proven, but he fights those damn dogs." Bobby said.
"We'll deal with it later. We need to get her to the hospital." Evy suddenly let out another scream. "What? What happened?"
"I went to pick her up and I touched her arm. I think it's dislocated." Sam said regretfully.
"It hurts!" Evy cried. She was crying so hard she was beginning to get sick.
"Dad, I can fix it…"
"No, Sam." John said. "No. She's too upset. She'll never sit still enough. We need to take her to the hospital." John turned towards Dean. "Dean, you're driving."
"Yes, sir." Dean said, racing towards the Impala.
"Little one, look at me." Evy looked up, holding her arm against herself. "We have to go to the hospital. You're hurt too badly for us to fix here. Okay?"
"Daddy, hep me." Evy said pitifully.
"I will come here."
John very, very carefully picked up the hurt Evy and carried her to the car. Bobby and Sam sat in the back, with John in the front passenger seat, trying to comfort the still crying Evy. John prayed that she wouldn't get sick, whether from her injuries or purely from crying. When they arrived, John didn't even wait for Dean to turn off the Impala before he sprinted out of the car and towards the hospital entrance. Evy exhausted herself crying, and after the doctor gave her a small dose of a mild painkiller, she was out like a light. The doctor, a friend of Bobby's, fixed her arm and gave the good news that her bites and scratches were all superficial.
"That's the good news." The doctor, who insisted on being called Barry, said. "I think you know the bad news, Bobby."
"Yeah." Bobby said. "At least she's asleep. This won't wake her up, right?"
"It shouldn't, but it might. One of you needs to hold her."
"Hold her for what?" Sam asked.
"Sam, she's got to have a rabies shot."
"Is that necessary?" Sam asked. "Doesn't that have a lot of side effects?"
"It can. And I won't lie. Evy's small for her age, so there's an increased risk of severe side effects. But compared to the possibility of her getting rabies…" Barry said.
"Sam, it's necessary. If she gets sick, we'll deal with it." John said. "Doc, get the shot ready."
"N…no…no shot…" a stirring Evy said from the exam bed where she was beginning to wake up.
"Great." John said. He'd hoped she would sleep through the shot. At least she slept through him fixing her arm.
"Daddy…"
"I'm here, little one." John said, going over to the bed next to her. "I'm right here."
Evy's eyes opened slowly. "'m I gettin' a sh…shot?" she slurred.
"I'm afraid so, little one." John said. "If you don't, you might get sick." He made careful effort not to say you might get sick anyway.
Evy whimpered, but Sam suddenly had an idea. "Dad? I've got an idea. Hold her in your lap."
John, curious, turned Evy around so she was facing Sam. Sam picked up a low sitting stool on the other side of the exam room. About that time, Barry came back with the vaccine in his hand. Evy whimpered again, and tried to get away, but John held her firmly and Sam grabbed the hand that wasn't in a sling.
"Cricket? Cricket, look at me."
"I scawed." Evy said.
"I know. Listen, I want you to do something." He put her hand to his cheek and held it there. "I need you to keep your hand there."
"Why?"
"Because all of a sudden, I'm feeling really sleepy. And I need you to keep me awake. Can you do that?" Sam asked.
"Why do you have to stay awake?" Evy asked. "Why can't you go to sleep?"
"Because if I do, I'll have to go to bed, and that means I can't read to you tonight." Sam explained.
Evy suddenly looked more alert. "I keeps you up."
"Okay. Don't let my cheek go or look away."
"Otay, Sammy, I wont's." Evy promised.
"Hold that cheek, no matter what." Sam said.
Evy nodded. "I got it."
"You sure, 'cause I feel kinda…" Sam pretended to nod off and snore.
Evy giggled and poked Sam's cheek. "Sammy! No seepin'!"
Sam pretended to hiccup and jerk awake. "Wha…?" he started to say, but smiled when Evy laughed again.
Barry used the distraction to stick Evy with the shot. It worked, but not entirely, Evy whimpered, but Sam kept her attention on him.
"Hand on my cheek, baby. Come on, it's almost over."
"It already is." Barry said. "You did very well, sweetheart."
"No more sots? Jus' dat one?"
"Just that one, darlin'." Barry said. "If it's alright with your dad, I've got a treat for you…"
Evy eagerly looked up into John's eyes. "Is okay, Daddy? Pease?"
John chuckled. "Sure."
"Here you go, sweetie." Barry pulled a Hershey bar out of his pocket and handed it to Evy. "There you go. Just for you."
"Tank you, Docta Bawwy." Evy said. "Sammy, you open for me, pease?"
"Sure, Cricket." Sam said.
Barry told all of them, "You guys are good to go if you're ready."
"Thanks, Barry." Bobby said. "What about the dog?"
"Animal control contacted me while I was out getting the vaccine. They're testing him, but it'll be a couple days at least before they know for sure. I'll call you when they know."
"Thanks." John said.
"No problem. Get this big, brave girl back home. I heard it was someone's birthday today…"
"Mine!" Evy said with a smile and a mouthful of chocolate.
"Happy birthday, darling. I hope you have a better time after you get home."
"Tank you." Evy said. "Daddy, we can still do my party tonight, wight?"
"I was thinking we wait 'till tomorrow…"
"Pease?" Evy begged. John didn't know if she did it unconsciously or not, but she placed her non hurt hand on her sling. "Pease, Daddy?"
"Alright, alright." John caved.
"Oh, no! Daddy, it gettin' dark. We forgotted about mommy's bawwoons!"
"I didn't forget, sweetie." John said.
"But how she gonna see 'em?" Evy said, eyes filling with tears.
"Shh, calm down, little one. It's always light in heaven. You just have to tell her they're coming and she'll see them once they get to heaven."
"You pwomise?" Evy asked.
"Promise."
"Otay." Evy said. "We go home now."
"Yes, ma'am. Let's go."
John drove this time, as Evy wanted to sit with Sam. She made sure to keep him awake so she could get her story that night. Bobby and John were eager to go down the street and confront the neighbor about his dog, but Sam convinced them to call the cops and confront him after Evy went to sleep. Finally, long after she should have been in bed, John was gathering the balloons for Evy, holding her, and walking outside with everyone.
"Daddy, tan I say somefin' before we let dem go?"
"Sure, little one. Go ahead." John said.
"I want everybody to have some bawwoons." Evy said, so John distributed them evenly among everyone. Evy held her own balloon tightly in her hand, and swallowed before she started to talk. She spoke slowly so she wouldn't start crying. "These is for you, mommy. We misses you down here. I wis' you could have 'tayed wif us. I hopes you happy up dere. We see you again one day."
Evy was the only one who succeeded in hiding her tears. As the balloons floated away, no one could see her, but Missy was there. She was standing just beside John and Evy, who kept her eyes towards the sky. Missy stroked Evy's cheek, her own heart aching at how much she missed Evy too. She had heard Evy screaming earlier, and had made sure the bullet Bobby fired missed her and hit the dog square in the heart.
"I miss you too, Kitten. Mommy still loves you." She kissed Evy's cheek and finally left back to heaven. Her departure looked like a shooting star, which Evy immediately picked up on.
"Daddy! Daddy, wook!"
"What, little one?" John asked. He looked up and saw the shooting star. "Yeah, I see it. Cool…"
"It's mommy! She's waving at us!" Evy insisted.
John smiled. "I think you're right, little one. Wave back at her."
"Hi, mommy." Evy said, waving up at the sky. "Wove you."
When Evy started to yawn, John suggested, "I think it's time for bed, little one."
"'Kay, Daddy." Evy said. "Daddy? I hads a bad dweam at da hospital."
"Of the dog?" Evy nodded. "You want to sleep with me tonight?"
"Yes, pease."
"I'll tell you what. Me and uncle Bobby have something to take care of. Sammy'll give you a bath and you can watch a video with him until I get back. How's that sound?" John asked.
"Deal." Evy said, reaching over for Sam.
"Okay. We'll be back, my angel. I love you."
"Wove you too, Daddy." Evy said.
