Jay's corner

*Peeks from behind the door*

Hi? I hope you guys don't hate me yet XD It's been a while but as I told you I had a few things to do before I could write again.

So, since I felt bad I wrote you an extra-long chapter! I had to write it two times since my laptop crashed and I lost all my files. Ugh.

I want to thank my pre-reader (and beta for this chapter) Casper15, she is wonderful and helped me when I had a dilemma while I was writing! Thank you

Since I know a lot of you were curious after the preview I sent, I will shut up now! Enjoy!


Too Gay For You

Chapter 5: Break the bottles

The sunlight shining against her eyelids and the harsh pounding in her head forced Bella out of her deep sleep. Trying to get away from the light, she rolled to find herself burrowing into something warm. Not only that but she was lying on a really comfy mattress. Bella's mattress was everything but comfy. Furrowing her brows in confusion, she opened her eyes a little and immediately closed them; the brightness in the room was causing her head to hurt more.

What the hell? Did she drink last night? Or did someone knock her on the head?

She started to panic a little, praying that she didn't manage to get herself kidnapped. With great effort, she began to focus on what she remembered last.

It was clear until she got the children home from the Cullen building but after that her mind came up completely empty. She could already hear Rosalie's voice in her head… Bella Swan, what did you do, again? Blah, Blah, Blah…

Groaning a little, she decided that she wouldn't know anything until she fully opened her eyes, at least to see where she was. Squeezing them shut first, she sent a little prayer to the God of Headaches asking him to be kind for once and grant her a few minutes without pain. She slowly pried her eyes open and what she saw was delightfully unexpected.

It was a chest. More precisely, a man's chest.

A really beautiful chest with full abs and very large muscular pecs.

She wanted to lick it and touch it. No, maybe touch it first then lick it. Yum.

Before she had time to do either or check to see who the man with the beautiful chest was, she heard a door behind her slam open. Bella jumped up, immediately regretting it when the God of Headaches took back his blessing. She felt the man next to her sit up as well and groan in pain. Feel my pain, bud. She started to turn in his direction but stopped when she heard a screech from the door.

"What the HELL is going on in here?"

Bella's head snapped toward the door to see a tall woman with strawberry blond hair reaching just below her shoulders, and the most beautiful face, standing there. A face that was bright red with anger. Strangely, she reminded Bella of someone but she couldn't put her finger on who…

"Tan?" That wasn't the woman talking. No, no. That voice came from behind Bella, clearly from the man with the beautiful chest that she wanted to lick and touch. Bella knew this voice. Now the real question was:

What the fuck was she doing in bed with Edward Cullen?


-16 Hours Before-

The journey home was oddly accident-free. Carlisle and Esmeralda walked ahead of Bella the whole way, holding there little hands tightly together, their heads bent toward each other whispering . No doubt conspiring. Sometimes glancing back at Bella.

It was obvious that it wasn't the first time that they walked from the office to the house; they seemed to know the road by heart. Soon, they reached the trees and the narrow path leading to the white villa and again Bella was struck by the beauty of the place. The hot Tampa sun shining through the trees only made it appear more heavenly. She couldn't help but imagine how it would feel to have such a wonderful subject to draw; her hands were already twitching in anticipation.

Bella was so lost in her thoughts; once again, she didn't even realize that the children didn't wait for her to let themselves in, throwing their backpacks on the floor in the living room before flopping down on the couch and turning the TV on.

How in the world did they open the door? Observing the door closer, she noticed a sort of electronic lock that she never saw before. It had a pad with numbers, for a password certainly and a little squared place to put your thumb. Bella wondered briefly if all rich people had such high-tech locks.

Rushing in the house, she froze for a moment to admire it from the inside for the first time. It was a beautiful house. The open areas made it look even more spacious and the glass walls gave the feeling that you weren't really in a house but outside enjoying the sun. However, looking at Carlisle and Esmeralda in here, it gave off a strangely uncomfortable feeling… If she hadn't seen them with her own two eyes, Bella would never have believed that children actually lived here. Excluding the few toys laying on the floor and the little paint handprints on one of the leather couches, everything was too neat and clean, too white and orderly, not homey. Just like a hospital; not at all fitting for little children. Bella sighed; Edward Cullen's house sure fit his personality.

She was brought back to the present when a booming noise came from the television and Carlisle and Esme giggled loudly. Remembering what she was here for, Bella slipped back into what she started calling "Badass Nannyella". Someone had to teach these children right from wrong and it might as well be her! Even if she wasn't the best example…who cares, she knew the mechanics of it… well, most of it… or at least a little bit… maybe not. Anyway, she was already here, so there was no way she would step back and give up before she even started. Go, Go, Nannyella, Go!

After her little cheer, she marched straight up to the television and turned it off, sighing in relief when the loud noise stopped. She didn't have a TV at home and she wasn't use to the noise, favoring quiet moments with a pencil and paper.

The kids groaned annoyingly from their place on the couch.

"What are you doing? We were watching that. Couldn't you see?!" Esmeralda asked rudely, crossing her little arms over her chest. Ignoring her rude behavior, Bella answered in what she hoped was a calm but firm voice.

"I saw alright, Miss Rude-Pants. But right now is not the time to watch TV. You still have to clean up and have a snack before doing your homework. Then, and only if you're good, you can watch TV, Ok?"

She watched as Esmeralda looked at her in surprise for a second before frowning deeply, her features morphing into a stubborn expression. She jumped down from her slouched position on the couch to come and stand right in front of Bella, looking her right in the eyes and holding her chin up.

"I don't care what you say, you're dumb anyway, and who listens to dumb people?" Esmeralda said slowly as if she was talking to another child. "I said I want to watch TV now so I will! The other nannies never said anything! So you can't tell me what to do!"

Bella couldn't hide the hurt from her face when Esme called her 'dumb'. She was used to Rosalie calling her that but having a six year old tell her she was stupid left her with an even more bitter feeling. Was she really that transparent that even kids couldn't respect her?

Still, without missing a beat or losing her temper, she bent down at the waist to reach Esmeralda's level and looked back at her with the best bitchface she could muster, trying to imitate Alice's perfect one.

"Listen to me, Esmeralda Cullen. If there is one thing you need to understand right this moment, it's that I am nothing like any of the nannies you had before. Do you know why?" Bella raised an eyebrow and smirked slightly before continuing without waiting for an answer. "It's because I can be way more stubborn that you will ever be. Whatever you do, I can do worse without even thinking about it." She snorted. "I do it on a daily basis and get scolded for it too. So what makes you think you, a child, can do whatever you want whenever you want?" Bella stared at her for a few seconds trying to see if she got her point across. When Esmeralda just kept looking at her stubbornly, she righted herself, understanding that this will be a duel to the end. "You think I can't tell you what to do? Watch me." On those words, Bella reached behind the big flat screen to unplug the alimentation, from the wall knowing the children were way too short to reach it.

Satisfied with her action, she turned back to the children who were staring at her with their eyes wide and their mouths hanging open. Clearly, it was the first time they got that kind of reaction and they didn't seem to take it well, mostly Esmeralda.

Understatement of the year.

"Now, if you want your snack you will take your backpacks, march up those stairs and go change and wash up. I will be up in a minute to help you and check, so no funny business, understood?"

Esmeralda just threw her a nasty glare that made Bella shiver a little, snatched up her backpack and her brother's before stomping up the stairs. Only little Carlisle, who hadn't said anything since they came back in, stayed standing in front of her, looking at her shockingly. Bella crouched down and smiled at him, ruffling his soft blond hair.

"What's up, little sun?" she asked him, throwing him a wink. He covered his mouth with his hands and giggled cutely into them, sending Bella into a fit of giggles too.

How cute could this kid be, really?

"Bewa?" he said when he stopped laughing, placing a hand on her cheek and tilting his head to the side, just like he did in the office earlier. "I wead you bookz lata', ok?"

It took her a second to understand what he said but when she did she nodded eagerly, flashing him a brilliant smile. "Of course, you can read me books later, little sun. Now chop chop and go change!" She demanded giving his little butt a light tap. He turned to run up the stairs and she waited for him to reach the top before letting herself fall on the floor in a heap.

It was like all her bravado and façade while attending these kids left her breathless. That wasn't her. She was, distracted, crazy, not-capable-of-keeping-a-job, irresponsible Bella. She always had been. But now she was responsible for two orphan children whom she almost lost today. And was employed by their rich asshole uncle. And she has a sister who surely hated her. Let's not forget that one of those children hated her with a passion and was, even if it was humiliating to admit, rather intimidating.

Seriously, since when did they start to produce such scary little girls?

Bella felt overwhelmed by all those changes in such a short period. She never was the serious one that people could look upon and take advice from. It was hard for her to maintain the façade for a few minutes; she didn't know how she will be able to manage it all the time. Suddenly, she felt like riding a Camel to The Sahara Desert and never coming back. Yeah, that sounded like a good idea.

On the other hand, she knew she couldn't just abandon Carlisle and Esmeralda to their own fate. Obviously, they were still deeply affected by everything that happened, Esmeralda more so. Bella couldn't help but wonder if she knew more than she was letting on. That little girl seemed so angry, Bella never saw her really smile. Even when she was laughing with her brother, it still seemed kind of fake.

Isabella could still remember when she was in the same situation. She just wanted to smash everything, cry and scream; and that's exactly what she did. For the month following their father and brother's sudden departure, when they started living with the lady, Bella was almost uncontrollable. Esme's behavior was nothing in comparison. She just needed someone to listen even if she didn't know how to say what was weighing on her heart.

It was then that Bella had an epiphany. Suddenly, she just knew and couldn't believe that the answer was right in front of her eyes. Esmeralda was not different from her and she just needed someone to help her realize what she was feeling and put her feelings into words and listen to those words.

She could do that. She could listen. Because she was the one who understood it all.

With a new determination, she rose from the floor and went searching for the kitchen, only to be awe-struck by the beauty of the villa once again. She started raiding the cupboards, searching for something which could be used as a snack till dinner time and discovered a new fact. Not only did Edward Cullen match his house to himself but his food too. She couldn't find one child-friendly food in the kitchen. Hell, most of it was instant food. No cakes, No candy, No milk. It was unbelievable and quite scary, really. Was he that oblivious or just plain selfish?

Groaning in defeat, Bella grabbed fruits and proceed to make the fastest fruit salad in history, adding bread and putting it all on two little plates. Then, she poured two cups of orange juice, setting everything on the big glass dinner table. Again, she wondered how three and six year old children could eat comfortably on such a big table. She really needed to start making some changes around here, starting with groceries, and soon.

Finally, she started walking up the stairs taking in the non-changing white surroundings. She passed a few doors, following the little voices to the end of a corridor and pushed on the door, of what seemed to be the children's room, opening it and doing a double take.

It was the biggest mess. Toys and clothes were thrown everywhere; the drawers were pulled out and on the floor with their content most likely somewhere in the room. Even the curtains were half hanging on the floor. The only things which seemed still in form were the two single beds and a big bookcase full of books against the only wall that wasn't glass.

And of course, there was Carlisle and Esmeralda…

They were out of their school uniforms but still half-dressed and currently throwing pillows at each other's faces, like little monkeys on drugs. Bella would have found it cute if she wasn't so pissed. Taking a deep breath to try and calm herself, she cleared her throat once, twice and when she got no response she clapped her hands loudly, finally catching the children's attention. They twirled around to look at her and Bella raised an eyebrow while giving them the once over. While Esmeralda was mostly dressed in a white tank top and unfastened shorts, Carlisle was only in his Pokémon undies watching her with the biggest smile on his face as if everything was normal. Bella couldn't hide her smile at his expression; this kid was a real cutie.

"What happened in here, huh?" Bella questioned, shaking her head a little before giving them a disapproving look. Esmeralda completely ignored her, put the pillow on a bed and turned to finish getting dressed. Carlisle quickly put his clothes on then strutted to her clapping happily.

"We pway! Bewa pway too?" But before she could answer, she was cut off by Esme.

"Shut up Car!" She screeched giving him a glare. The smile disappeared from his face and he frowned. Bella looked at her too shocked for words.

"But…" He whispered, tears brimming in his eyes.

"I said shut up! We don't play with her, remember? Now come on." She grabbed Carlisle's hand and started tugging him toward the door but before they could go anywhere, Bella positioned herself in front of the door, blocking the way.

"Esmeralda! You can't talk to your brother like that! If he wants to talk, he has the right to talk just like you do!" She gave her a hard look and Esme just turned her head in the other direction. "And tell me where do you think you are going? Didn't you see the state of this room? Who do you think is going to clean it up? Hm?"

Before she could add something, Esme rushed forward, pushing Bella hard on the hip with her shoulder, causing her to stumble onto the door frame.

"If you want it clean, then clean it!" She screamed while running down the corridor and stairs taking Carlisle with her. Bella immediately righted herself and took off after them, almost falling down the stairs in the process, and found them sitting at the dinner table eating their fruits calmly, the image of the perfect children.

But Bella knew better now. She approached them warily, a suspicious look on her face as she rounded the table. When she was sure that they weren't planning something sneaky, she came to stand at the end of the table and thought about what they still have to do. It was almost 5pm now, they still haven't started on their homework and their room was a complete war zone. The moment they put the last piece of fruit in their mouth, she started to speak before they took the chance and tried to escape.

"Ok, guys. I know you aren't going to like it but there is no way your room stays like that." She scowled a little. "It's really dangerous to have a room so messy because then bugs and insects will come and hide in there." Esme's eyes widened comically. Huh oh… Seems like someone is afraid of bugs. Bella smirked internally. I so rule this! "So here is what we are going to do. You are going to go and get your homework and we will go over it together; then we will take care of your room so bugs will stay away, ok?"

Bella couldn't help the little laugh that escaped her when Esme, who likes to just ignore her, started nodding eagerly and ran up the stairs coming back with both of their backpacks a few seconds later. They all sat on cushions around the coffee table in the living-room and while Bella helped Carlisle with his numbers since he only went to the School Day-Care and didn't have homework, Esmeralda sat quietly on her side, focusing on her alphabet. Bella tried to help her but she only met a resounding 'NO' when she asked if she wanted help. After half an hour of trying to explain to Carlisle why 'twenty-ten' doesn't exist, Bella checked on Esme's homework and declared homework time finished.

Their room was next. The children started to put their toys back into their play chest and Bella went to search the house for cleaning supplies, knowing she saw them somewhere earlier. Once she found them, she went back to the children's room to find them folding their clothes; well for Carlisle trying would be a better word. He was just rolling them in balls and putting them on the bed; but then he will look at Esmeralda's clothes folded neatly on her bed, frown and try to fold the cloth again. Bella went to sit next to him on the floor, giving him a sweet smile and pushed his hair out his eyes.

"Why the frown, Sunny?" She asked, referring to his bright blond hair. His blue eyes focused on her brown eyes and he pouted, making Bella's heart melt like chocolate.

"I do cloz but I no good." He held up a rolled shirt as if to prove his point. "You hep me Bewa, pwease?" he asked her, pleading with his eyes. How could she deny him anything?

"Of course, sweet pea." She answered softly, reached for a shirt and showed him how to fold it correctly. Esme who was watching the scene with rapt interest suddenly threw the dress she had in her hands right on Bella's head.

"Why are you helping him and not me? That's not fair!" She yelled, crossing her little arms and sitting down on the floor too. Bella grabbed the dress off her head, folded it and went to put it with Esme's other clothes on the bed.

"If you want help, Esmeralda, you have to ask politely first. Your little brother did so I am helping him; it's as simple as that." Bella stated, her hands placed on her round hips. Esme looked at her for a moment, the hesitancy visible in her eyes. Bella could feel her hope getting up but it was crushed when Esme huffed stubbornly and went back to folding her clothes, showing her back to Bella.

Bella just sighed going back to helping Carlisle. At least this one liked her.


-13 hours before-

After a good hour of cleaning, it was actually possible to see the real color of the children's bedroom floor. Everything was in place; only the curtains remained unattached since Bella was too short to tie them back, even standing on a chair.

At the moment, Esme and Carlisle were watching TV while she was trying to figure out what she would cook for dinner. The fridge was almost empty, irritating her, and her wig was growing uncomfortable, pissing her off even more. After debating for a few minutes, she found a can of mushrooms and decided on a mushroom cream omelet and started to get what she would need.

It was then she realized that she hadn't heard the children say anything for a while now. She slowly made her way toward the living room only to find it empty, the television still on. She turned it off and was going to call for them but stopped short when she felt something wet land on her back. She twirled around, coming nose to nose with two little pranksters armed with full water guns and gasped in surprise when another patch of water landed right on her forehead and her short wig, slowly rolling down her face. A sharp, shocked laugh escaped her when the situation finally dawned on her.

"Oh, you little…" Before she could finish her sentence a perfectly aimed splash of water entered her mouth and she immediately started sputtering it out causing the children to laugh hysterically, almost rolling on the floor. They were so absorbed in their fun that they didn't noticed Bella launching herself forward and grabbing Carlisle's water gun. They stopped laughing the moment they realized that they were now equally armed. Carlisle ran to hide himself behind his sister, who was staring at Bella with an air of defiance as if daring her to fire first. They sized each other up for a few moments before starting to shoot water at each other in earnest. Soon, they were all completely soaked and the tense mood dissolved into a playful one, the sound of laughter still filling the house even when the guns became empty.

Finding herself gasping for air on the floor, Bella couldn't help the elated feeling that washed over her when she saw the bright smile on Esme's face. Full bronze curls and green eyes, both the exact same shade as Edward's; she was truly a beautiful child. When their eyes met, Bella smiled softly at her and to her utter disappointment Esmeralda seemed to tense up immediately. All traces of laughter left her face and she jumped up, running up the stairs, her hair flying behind her. Bella sighed. She already knew it wouldn't be that easy but she was still aggravated.

She jumped a little when she felt a wet little body climb on her lap.

"Meme is sad? No pway no more?" Carlisle whispered sadly, laying his head on her chest. Bella started stroking his hair gently, not knowing how to explain to him why his sister was behaving this way.

"Yes, sweetheart, Esmeralda is a little sad lately… but I am going to do my best so that she is happy again , I promise" she said kissing hid head lightly.

He just frowned deeply. "Unca Eddie made pwomise too…" he said so low that she almost didn't hear him. Bella wanted to question him about what he said, but he got up from her lap and looked at her with an impatient expression. "Bewa, I hungwy now."

Bella's eyes widened as she remember that she hadn't started on dinner and left everything out on the kitchen counter. She got up hastily, telling Carlisle to go upstairs and tell his sister that it was time to put their pajamas on while she finished making their dinner.

She then ran into the kitchen, throwing her now wet wig on her bag letting her long hair fall in soft brown waves down her back. Her hair was slightly damp and smelling a little like sweat but she figured she could wash it later and focused on cracking eggs and mixing the mushroom cream. She quickly finished, putting the omelets on three plates, leaving one on the fridge for Mr. Cullen and putting the other two on the big dining table. The children choose that exact moment to come into the kitchen, both in their sleeping clothes as instructed and Bella giggled at little Car's Pikachu sleep suit; with his blond hair and cute face, it was incredibly fitting; her own love for the little creatures making her smile. Bella watched them enter the room in surprise; she didn't know what she exactly expected but it sure wasn't for them to do as they were told. Looking closer, she noticed how tired they looked, it was normal after the day they had, and she based their sudden obedient behavior on them being exhausted.

She stepped forward to help Carlisle on his seat before realizing how ridiculous all of this was. Why would kids eat on such an enormous uncomfortable table? Carlisle's head didn't even completely reach higher than the table.

"Wait" she told them, they looked up at her in surprise when she took the two plates off the table. "Follow me." She walked with determination to the living room, set the plates on the coffee table and gestured for them to sit on the same cushions they used while doing their homework. They sat down looking a little lost, clearly not understanding the change of location. "From now on, this is where we eat. That table is way too big. What was your uncle thinking?" she explained, muttering the last part. Carlisle gave her the biggest smile and started eating in earnest like it as his first meal since last week, humming in pleasure and looking too cute for words. On the other hand, Esme eyed the omelet suspiciously for a minute before tentatively taking a bite. Bella witnessed proudly as her eyes widened and she took another eager bite.

For the first time since she met them, they were completely silent. Bella knew that her cooking was good; after all with the quantity of food she ate it would be strange if her cooking was bad, but Rosalie wasn't a fan of compliments and it felt good to see someone enjoying it.

Bella slowly rose from the floor like she was afraid to disturb the peace reining in the house and went to retrieve glasses and a bottle of water from the fridge. She served Car only half of a glass, not sure if he was still wetting his bed, and turned to Esmeralda.

"Would you like some water, Esmeralda?" she asked gently, anticipating the certain harsh reply that was coming. Imagine her surprise when the little girl answered her in the softest voice.

"Yes, please." She didn't look at her when she talked, hiding behind her hair, but, hey, it was a start. Bella put the glass of water in front of her and turned when she felt eyes on her. Carlisle was looking at her with the oddest expression, his little face scrunched up in confusion. She gave him an encouraging smile.

"Bewa?" he whispered "You hava' magic haiw?" he asked staring at her hair. "You haiw is long supa' fast!" he exclaimed, his eyes opened wide and his arms parted in a grand gesture.

It took everything in Bella not to start laughing out loud. She could feel her eyes water with the effort but managed to respond in a somewhat controlled voice.

"No, Sunny. I was wearing a wig earlier that's all." Seeing his brows furrowed at the term, she explained. "A wig is like… It's fake hair that you put on top of your real hair to hide it. That's why I wear it; I want to hide my hair. This is my real hair." She finished pointing at her brows curls.

He grinned at her. "Bewa's pwetty!" He sang, tilting his head from side to side.

"Why?" The question surprised Bella. Not because she didn't know how to answer but because it came from Esme. The little girl looked up at her through her hair and clearly taking her surprised expression the wrong way, she quickly went on. "I mean your hair is pretty, I would like to have hair like that." She shrugged, blushing a little.

The smile on Bella's face could put the sun to shame. Hesitantly, she reached up and passed her fingers through Esme's hair. "Thank you, princess. But your hair is the prettiest." She said winking at her.

Blushing profusely now, Esme pushed Bella's hand out of her hair and got up gathering her and her brother's plates in her hands, refusing to meet Bella's eyes. "It doesn't change that you're still dumb!" she huffed, rushing into the kitchen. Bella's smile didn't even waver; no matter how Esmeralda tried to appear, the words were not half as mean and harsh as earlier. For the third time that day, Bella felt hope.


-9 hours before-

Bella was standing alone in the kitchen after the kids finally went to sleep. She was exhausted after everything that happened.

Surprisingly, bed time wasn't as bad as she thought it would be. Esmeralda sat quietly on her bed listening to her iPod –seriously, since when do six year olds need iPods?- while Carlisle was lying with Bella on his bed, reading her bookz, as he called them. They were just image books, and he was making up the entire story but Bella ate it all up, acting surprised or sad at all the right moments, much to his pleasure.

When he started to doze off, Bella gently tucked him in and went to turn off his bedside lamp only to be stopped by Esmeralda.

"You can't turn it off. He gets scared in the dark." She said not looking up from her gadget. Bella wanted to ask her why they didn't have their own room, the house was big enough and she was already six, but she refrained figuring that she pushed her enough for one day. She kissed Carlisle blond head lightly and turned to Esmeralda, hesitating, however the decision was made for her when she put her iPod under her pillow and turned away from Bella, burrowing under her blanket.

After that Bella proceed to clean the house, getting rid of the paint on the white sofa with a wet rag and some nail polish remover she had in her bag. It was Alice's because Bella wouldn't go near nail polish for anything in the world.

So at 11pm, the toys lying around were back at their place, the kitchen neat and the leather sofa was free of the little hand prints.

But Edward Cullen still wasn't there.

Bella huffed in irritation throwing herself down on the couch in the living room. She didn't have his number and she didn't want to call Rosalie to ask her for it. She too had some dignity and was still royally pissed that she hit her.

She reached for her bag, getting the big bag full of candy she bought for the kids before retrieving them at school. Every one that knew Bella knew of her love for candy and anything sweet. She opened the bag, popping one candy in her mouth and humming in appreciation while looking around the room. She narrowed her eyes when something caught her attention in the corner. She didn't even realize before but there was a tall statue of a naked Apollo standing there. Bella busted out laughing; not that having a statue was funny but someone had tied a flowery loincloth around the Apollo private parts, clearly to try and preserve the children's innocence.

Bella made her way to the statue and sat down in front on it, bag of candy still in her hands and slowly peeked under the cloth before laughing even more. What, it was funny!

She cleared her throat and patted Apollo's leg, feeling strangely guilty.

"Listen, I am not really laughing at you, I promise!" she said throwing her hands in the air, " I just never thought Apollo's… hum … thing… would be so little. I thought you were a God." She snorted and put a fistful of candy in her mouth. She chewed for a while and looked up at the statue again. "Don't you feel lonely? I mean since you can't talk and all, I suppose no one takes the time to talk to you." She paused as if waiting for an answer. "I know how you feel, you know…" she nodded to herself, "Whenever I say something I feel like everyone thinks it's not worth listening to. So I prefer to stay silent most of the time now, it's easier. At the end your method is the best; silence is cool too."

She got up, taking her candies, and faced the statue again. "How about we become friends? I'm Bella, nice to meet ya!" She continued her one-sided discussion, putting her hand on the Apollo's unmoving one as if to shake it. "And you're Apollo; I know so don't feel pressured to say anything back." Bella put a hand on its shoulder in a comforting gesture. "How about we give you a nickname huh? I mean, no offense but what kind of name is Apollo anyway? Let me think…" She started to pace, seeming deep in thought. After a few seconds, she clapped her hands in childlike excitement and faced him again. "I know! How about Popo? It's great! So Bella and Popo! That sounds good, right. God, I'm a genius." She looked at Popo's face expectantly and after obviously getting no answer, she huffed, sticking her tongue out before stomping to the kitchen since her new BFF didn't seem to be in a talkative mood tonight.

And now I am talking to a statue… Bravo, Bella Swan! Way to go! You really need more friends. She thought grimly but her pity party stopped immediately when she heard the sound of a car parking in front of the house. She didn't move, waiting patiently for the person to come in and find her there. The sound of someone pressing numbers on the lock pad was heard and Edward Cullen made his way inside of his house. He hung his vest and threw his work bag on the floor and Bella didn't have to wonder anymore where the children learned it.

He looked around the house warily. It was actually clean. Not a toy, a cloth on the floor, for the first time in two months his house really looked like his house. Looking for Bella, he entered the kitchen and stopped short when he saw a head full of thick brown hair standing near the counter with her back to him.

"Who are…" he started to demand but stopped himself when she turned around. Isabella Swan. Holy Shit, This is Isabella Swan! He suspected that she was wearing a wig before but now she looked even more beautiful and it wasn't helping in any way. Only he would be lusting after his lesbian nanny. Well, it's not like anyone else wouldn't! She's hot! Look at her body, man… and that luscious hair… I would… He must have stared at her longer than socially acceptable because she was suddenly standing in front of him pinching his check hard. "Ouch! What the hell!" he cried holding his stinging check. Yeah, at the end she was still crazy.

Bella just rolled her eyes in response. "Don't be such a baby! You should just take a picture it will last longer!" she said scowling at him. No matter how hot he looked in his perfectly tailored suit, in her eyes he was still an asshole. "Now, how come you're here now?"

He looked at her in surprise. "What do you mean? This is my house!"

She rolled her eyes again and he frowned at her. "I know that, idiot!" she almost growled at him. The more time passed, the more she was remembering all the things she needed to tell him, starting with his lack of good food for the children and she had trouble controlling her temper. "I mean at this hour! It's almost midnight for fuck's sake! I have a home too you know, and it's not next door. What are you going to do if something happen to me while I walk in the streets at the crack of dawn, huh?" She didn't let him answer and pressed a finger on his chest and pushed him a little. "I'll tell you! Nothing, because you're a selfish asshole!" she said her voice rising a little. She knew she had to calm down before she woke up the children.

Edward was conscious that he wasn't her favorite person but he didn't realize she hated him that much. It wasn't like he deserved it. His inner voice immediately made itself known.

Nooo, of course you don't… you just got her fired, insulting her in the process, then accused her of plotting against you and you hide vital information from her. Of course, she should just love you about now.

Edward scowled internally. Ok, maybe after all he deserved it. He cleared his throat awkwardly and glanced back at Bella who was still fuming. He looked at her with his best sincere face and spoke softly. "You are right and I am sorry. I should at least have called to tell you I would be coming late." He took her hand and she instantly snatched it back, rubbing it on her jeans. Harsh! "And please don't worry about going home, I will be sure that you have an available and already paid for taxi, every night." He flashed her his crooked smile and she deflated a little but still looking a little uncertain. His smile widened as he looked at her from under his long eyelashes. Bella could feel the blush rising to her cheeks and she turned away from him and sat at the table before she started swooning on the spot.

"We need to talk" she stated with force, not leaving room for discussion. Edward sighed heavily and took a seat at the table too waiting for her to start talking.

"Have you looked at your fridge lately, Mr. Cullen?" she asked him boldly. He nodded his head, not understanding where she was going with this. He knew there was food since he went grocery shopping the week before. "Really? Then I suppose you realize that nothing in it is suited for young children?" He just gave her a clueless look, so she got up tugging him with her by the collar of his shirt. That girl really has a problem. She stopped in front of the fridge, opened it wide and started rambling. "There are little to no vegetables in there! Children need nutrients and for that they have to eat vegetables! And what are all those microwave meals? Do you think this is a way to raise children! No yogurt, no cake, no milk and almost no fruit! Hell, you don't even have pasta! Not only that but do you really think they feel comfortable in this big house with nothing to do in it!" She twirled around and Edward was watching her with a slightly frightened expression. "You listened to me, Cullen. From now on, I am the one taking care of this house because let me tell you, You. Really. Suck. At. It!" She punctuated each word with a poke to his chest. She looked at him, waiting for a response to her rant but he just stared at her.

For the first time in his life Edward was speechless. This crazy girl that he only met yesterday was standing right in front of him, fearlessly telling him how to take care of his own house. He was Edward Cullen for heaven's sake! He was rich, handsome and a brilliant lawyer; he was used to have women grovel at his feet and not to them screaming and chastising him. Suddenly, the situation seemed awfully funny and he started to laugh loudly, but Bella clamped her hand over his mouth.

"The kids are sleeping, you idiot!" she shushed him and he immediately quieted down, taking her hand off his face. He looked toward the still wide opened fridge and grimaced when he realize that she was right, once more. He was so used to picking groceries for himself that he didn't consider a change when the children came. He sighed.

"You are right… I guess I didn't adapt really well." She just snorted in response. "If you say you want to take care of it then I trust you… I guess. I'll just leave you my card so that you can… buy what they need." He told Bella hesitantly, wondering if it really was a good idea. Anyway, it wasn't like he had a choice since he didn't know a thing about groceries and cooking. Bella gave him a smug smile. "So does that mean you're taking the job for real? I don't want to continue playing around with this. I told you I will give you till tonight. It's tonight. Will you sign the contract, yes or no?" he asked raising an eyebrow at her, a stern expression on his face.

Bella looked at him for a moment, considering stalling just to piss him off some more but thought better of it. Not looking away from his face, she nodded firmly.

"Yes, I will. And don't worry about the house; I will take care of it."

Edward went to answer but was cut off by his stomach's loud rumbling. He gasped in embarrassment and looked away from Bella not wanting her to see it on his face. She giggled mockingly and Edward couldn't help but to smile at the sound.

"Looks like Mr. Big Lawyer is hungry. I made you an omelet while I was making the children's dinner, it's in the fridge." On those words, she turned her back to him, reached for a bag of candy and started to eat again. Edward grabbed the plate from the fridge and put it on the microwave to heat it. While it was in there, he observed her for a moment before he couldn't take it anymore and had to ask her.

"Why are you eating candy at this hour?" his tone was light and curious as he watched her shoveling little colorful candies in her mouth. He saw her chew and swallow before she answered not bothering to turn.

"I'm hungry, I didn't have diner yet. And I love sweets, they're the best." She started to reach for the candies again and frowned when she saw that the bag was almost empty.

"Why didn't you eat dinner? You cooked for all of us; you should have made yourself some too. I know I didn't tell you this before but please, don't hesitate to help yourself when you are here. I know that watching the kids is hard work." He said hoping to convince her to at least eat a little so he wouldn't feel guilty.

Bella finally turned around to look at him.

"Really, I can? You sure?" he nodded, reaching for his now hot plate. "Ok, thanks!"

And before he could blink, she had already gotten eggs and other ingredients out and was mixing something.

Still keeping her in his sight at the corner of his eyes, he sat at the table, took his first bite and groaned loudly. The beautiful, crazy, lesbian girl could cook! He started to devour what was left on his plate and was so focused that he jumped a little in surprise when Bella took a seat in front of him. On her plate she had piled three mushroom omelets and Edward looked at her, shocked by the amount of food.

"You're going to eat all of that?"

"Yeah, I'm on a diet." She answered, completely serious, frowning at her plate. "This will do." Edward watched her in amazement as she ate. He never saw a girl eating so much with such enjoyment before. He stared and stared until she raised her head from her food to glare at him. "What?"

He cleared his throat and clapped his hands together, wanting to change the subject from his stalker-like observation. He looked around the kitchen quickly before his eyes settled on his little wine fridge and alcohol transparent cupboard. "Want some wine?" Without waiting for an answer, he hastily got up, got two wine glasses and a bottle of red wine from the fridge and brought it to the table. He filled the two glasses and sat back down, all the while thinking about how to strike a somehow friendly conversation with her for the first time since the met.

"Hum… You really know how to cook, it was really good." He said awkwardly. Bella shrugged.

"When you don't have the money to buy all the things you want to eat, you learn to be creative." She smiled a little, but it was bitter. "I remember Mike used to like the things I cooked." She said before realizing her mistake. Her eyes widened and she stilled, fork up in the air.

"Mike?" Edward asked staring at her intently. I thought she was gay.

Bella wanted to smack herself on the forehead for slipping like this. "Mike… he…" she bit on her lip, trying to come up with something. "Mike… was a dog we used to have!" she said a little more loudly than necessary. "Yeah, a really, really cute dog. The cutest! But … hum… he ran away with a bitch." She muttered the last part and reached for her wine and downed it all before tilting it toward Edward as if asking for more. He gave her an unsure look but she rolled her eyes and grabbed the bottle pouring herself another full glass. Maybe she will have more chance to survive this discussion with alcohol in her system.

Edward shrugged and started to sip on his wine, thinking about what he could ask her next. Before long his glass was empty too and he remembered that he forgot to ask about how the day went with the children.

"I wanted to ask you, I noticed that the house is awfully calm tonight. How did everything go after you came home?" he asked dreading the answer.

Bella, who was starting on her last omelet, scratched her head a little as if trying to find the best words. "Well, I won't lie and say everything went great. I had a few little… mishaps with Esmeralda but I was able to manage it… somewhat. And Sunny was a true little angel and such a cutie." She sighed, wishing that Esme could be as easy as Car.

"Well, that's … great." Edward said not really knowing how to take the news. When Rose told him Bella would be good for them he had his doubts and still had. But after the 'lost children' accident, she seemed to get into it. But could she really manage to save the situation so fast? Edward was dubious. Suddenly, something occurred to him. "Sunny?"

"Yeah, you know, since he is blond and all."

Edward nodded, it made sense. Carelessly refilling his glass and hers, which was now half empty, he started on the subject that really made him curious. "I wanted to ask you; Do you sometimes worry about how others see you because you're… homosexual?" he asked, watching her expectantly.

Bella considered a harsh reply to mind his own business but changed her mind and decided to play the game. Maybe it was the alcohol, but she was feeling suddenly adventurous. "Please!" she scoffed, putting her fork down. "What century is this? Of course I don't!" She reached for her glass and started to gulp it down again. Oooh yeah, liquid bravado. She was starting to feel a little fuzzy.

Edward not wanting to be left behind, finished his second glass of wine and got up to get a new one, filling both of their glass again. "Your family… I mean, your older sister," Bella scowled at the mention of her sister. "When did she find out?"

Bella was starting to get into dangerous waters. She didn't know what to say to make it believable so she decided to try and turn the tables on her favor. She smirked at him, "why should I just tell you all of this for free? Let's play a game and I'll tell you!" he raised an eyebrow at her in question. "You try and guess and if you can't you have to drink! You have three chances, ok?" She let him absolutely no choice as she got up and start rummaging through the cupboard and came back with a bottle of vodka. She could feel the rush of the alcohol and was relishing in it after the day she had. Edward too was starting to feel the effect of the wine, never being a big drinker himself.

They game started and of course, Edward couldn't guess how Rosalie found out about Bella's imaginary homosexuality and he had to drink again and again. Soon Bella felt bored of her own game and joined him. The rest of the night was blurry but she knew they had a lot of fun, making drunken jokes and chasing after each other to Edward's room where they promptly fell asleep in their drunken daze.


Jay's Corner

So did you like it? I hope so! Please don't forget to review!

REVIEW= PREVIEW!

I don't have a rec this chapter, it's long enough but I have some info!

I HAVE AN OUTTAKE FOR YOUUUU! XD

It's coming before Monday and is in Esme's Pov this is everything I am saying for now!

See you soon, lovelies!