The two women left for the library and made their way there relatively quickly. Sigyn felt far better about what had happened with Loki after speaking with her new friend, but she still didn't know what she would say to Loki when she met him next.
She sighed. Maybe Sif's right. Maybe he didn't understand what it would do or what it would mean to me... she thought. That still doesn't change what he did, a voice in the back of her mind countered, and she knew that that was the truth of it. Even if he hadn't meant it, he had still done it.
Sigyn tried to turn her mind from the subject as she and Sif pushed open the doors to the Asgardian library. She didn't want to think about that anymore, and, in the library, she finally had something to distract her. A nervous energy crept over Sigyn as her intrigue grew; she couldn't wait to get her hands on the books that would help her learn to control her magic.
With a quick nod to the Archive Keeper, who responded only with his typical scowl, Sif and Sigyn found their way to the back of the library- though Sigyn purposely avoided the place where she and Loki usually sat because she didn't want to associate the place with how she was feeling about her husband right then.
Sigyn turned to the huge rows of stone shelves while Sif took a seat. The smaller woman placed her hands on her hips and stared at the books in front of her. Her brows creased into a slight frown and she couldn't help but turn back to Sif, confused as she caught sight of something that she never had before.
"Is it just me, or are some of those books glowing?"
Sif smiled a little and replied, "Only the magic ones."
Sigyn blinked. Magic books give off a glow? In all the years I've been coming here, I never noticed that... she thought, still frowning. How is that even possible?
"And I've never noticed this before because...?"
"It's because those without magic are not meant to notice them. There is a spell upon them so that any person without magic would only see an uninteresting book or one filled with just blank pages should they try to read it."
Sigyn stared at Sif blankly. She remembered coming across a few of those books in her time, and she remembered being confused when she had. Now it made sense, she supposed.
"Oh..." Sigyn said before turning back to the shelves.
Using the slight glowing as a basis for locating the books she sought, Sigyn picked a few out cautiously. She had no idea what to expect when she set them down on the table, ready to read, but she couldn't help but feel nervous about it.
Just as she took a seat, Sif said, "I think I'll leave you to your reading."
Sigyn blinked before slowly raising a brow and asking, "Returning to utter boredom?"
Sif faltered a little and attempted to recover herself with a shrug.
"I'm not overly fond of the library; the walk did save me from the monotony though."
"Well, I'm glad to have done that at least then."
Sif smiled slightly, and finally acquiesced, "In truth, I wanted to make sure that you were alright."
Sigyn grinned and said, "Thank you. I really do appreciate it, Sif."
"Oh but, as a piece of advice, don't let your husband near your hair," Sif recommended, smiling a little sadly.
Sigyn blinked, while the taller woman nodded and departed from the library, leaving Sigyn to marvel at her new-found friend. She had barely spoken to Sif before and yet she seemed to care for her. Sigyn didn't really understand it, and that was probably because she had not ad that many friends in the past; but it was a nice feeling.
She sighed and turned back to her books. Without Sif there, Sigyn read her way through a number of books and she found several with spells that she could teach herself. Simple ones that were specifically labelled for beginners, that was. There were some that caught her eye particularly, for example, she came across one that taught her how to silence her footsteps, and another that taught her how to grow flowers out of thin air.
They seemed silly little things, but they were things that also seemed small enough for her to think she might actually be able to accomplish them. And when Sigyn finally tried one of them out, she found that a slightly wilted lily formed in her hand from nothing. She blinked and stared at the flower in her hand. It had been so easy to create.
The book had told her to focus her concentration, to think carefully about what she wanted and then to relax; to release the magic. It was really much like the advice that Loki had given her about playing the violin. And that only forced another frown onto her expression.
So Loki had sort of been teaching her- even if he had lied about it. But he hadn't let her know that that was what she was supposed to be doing; and that was what annoyed her. And the fact that she had managed to quickly get the hang of the first spell that she'd tried also annoyed her.
She dropped the somewhat clumsy flower that she had managed to create on top of her book and sighed. Why did Loki lie? she found herself wondering again. It was in his nature, she knew, but why had he lied about this? Surely he had seen how important doing this right had been to her. How much she had doubted herself.
Sigyn tried to stop thinking about it; the Asgardian Library was not a good place to start getting angry. Its contents were just too precious and flammable for accidental combustion; plus the Archive Keeper would probably murder her if anything happened. With a frown, she returned her books to their rightful places and left before anything could go wrong.
On her way back to the palace, Sigyn bumped into Njal and Halvar, standing in place at their normal watch. She gave them an unconvincing and half-hearted smile as she dawdled by.
"Evening," Njal nodded to her.
Halvar remained as stony-faced and silent as usual.
"Trouble with the prince?" Njal added, noting her expression.
"Something like that," she shrugged as she passed.
Just as she passed them, Sigyn remembered something and turned back.
"Njal?"
"Yes?" the guard asked, looking round to face her.
"Just as a piece of advice; stay away from my sisters."
He looked confused, but said nothing. He had no intentions towards Sigyn's sisters, and he couldn't help but wonder why she thought that he might have.
"Trust me, it'll be better for your health if you do. It might also be better if you pretend that you're married if ever you're around them," she added quickly.
He nodded, still a little puzzled, and watched her walk away.
Sigyn went back to her and Loki's rooms questioning whether or not her husband would be there when she arrived. She knew that she had to go back at some point, but she couldn't seem to quicken her pace there- and she was walking as slowly as she could.
It bothered her that she had no idea what mood Loki would be in when she returned. Truthfully, Sigyn had no idea what mood that she was in. But she wished that she could know his thoughts; she wished that he could know what he felt about what had happened, just so that she could tell if Sif had been right.
She didn't hear music as she walked down the hall and that bothered her. She could usually understand something of Loki's mood from the music he played; but not this time. No sound could be heard but her footsteps, and she couldn't help but pause when she noticed them.
Sigyn decided that the spell she'd learnt in the library that could silence her footsteps might actually be useful now, and she cast it over her feet. Concentrating hard on what she wanted to happen, she tried to recreate the steps from the book, and was met with quite promising success.
That was, apart from when part of the wall hanging to her right caught fire. Hastily she patted it down, with the rest of the material, removing the air from the flames. She'd become quite the expert at extinguishing flames by then.
With her accidental pyrotechnics put out, Sigyn breathed a sigh of relief before continuing down the corridor, her footsteps silenced. When she reached the door to their rooms, she paused. She wondered what Loki would say after he'd just left like that; after he had upset her so much. This was going to be an interesting conversation to say the least.
But for some reason, Sigyn was a little too nervous about what might happen next to walk straight into her and Loki's rooms. So, biting her lip, she tentatively pushed open the door only slightly enough so that she could see into the adjoining room. Though she found herself genuinely surprised by what she saw inside.
Loki stood in front of the dying fire, his back mostly towards the door. Sigyn stared; the dim light illuminated a deep frown set into his expression. That, combined with his clenched fists and the way that he seemed to stare so vacantly into the flickering flames, worried her already.
And that was before she turned her head to look around the room. She blinked when she saw that it was an utter mess. Tables were overturned and chairs out of place. It looked as if something made of glass had been smashed onto the floor, and one of the curtains was torn.
What happened in here? she thought. It looks like Thor got angry and went on a rampage... But there was only Loki in the room; and his expression more than hinted that it was he that had gone on said 'rampage'.Sigyn walked into the room, closing the door softly behind her.
"Loki?" she said softly.
His head whipped around to her immediately, his eyes suddenly almost surprised. And he was in front of her in a second.
"Sigyn," he murmured, his hands coming up to cup her cheeks.
"What happened?" she asked, confused.
Loki didn't answer her question, he merely muttered, "You came back."
She blinked and looked up at him.
"What do you mean, I came back?"
"After I left... I returned to make amends for my actions; you weren't here. I went to the library; you weren't there either. I couldn't find you anywhere..."
Sigyn stared at her husband. He tried to find me afterwards? she thought, a little surprised. That was news to her. It might have made her feel a little better about it, but the look in Loki's eyes stopped her.
"I thought you'd left."
She frowned.
"Left? I met Sif on the way to the library and got caught up."
Then it was Loki's turn to frown, even though a hint of realisation dawned in his eyes. She was with Sif? That explained why he hadn't been able to find her. He hadn't thought that Sigyn and Sif were friends- he and Sif barely managed to keep civility at times, so he hadn't thought that Sif would even try speaking to his wife.
It hadn't crossed his mind to look for his wife where the warrior woman was; and Loki couldn't help but wonder why Sif had chosen to approach her. It appeared an unfortunate coincidence also, that his wife was with the person he had least expected on the one day that he needed desperately to find her.
"I thought you'd left," he repeated.
When she said nothing, he let out a deep sigh.
"I got angry," Loki admitted as an explanation for the state of the room, raising his hand to gesture at the mess.
Sigyn's eyes travelled around the room again before returning to her husband's face.
"Is that why our home looks like a herd of Bilgesnipe ran though it?
He smiled a little, her attempt at lightening the situation seemingly working.
"Perhaps."
But Loki's expression quickly became humourless again. Even his eyes were hard-set and serious.
"I am sorry to have caused you pain, love. It was not my intention."
Sigyn blinked. Did Loki just say sorry? Since when does Loki ever say sorry? She was almost stunned by his words and couldn't find a reply for such a revelation.
"I wanted to see how you would cope- and, admittedly, you have done exceedingly well. But..."
He paused, and she looked up at him, only then seeing something that she had rarely seen in her husband's eyes. True sincerity.
"I can see that, in this instance, it was wrong of me."
At that admission, Sigyn threw her arms around Loki and kissed him, much to his surprise. He does understand! she thought, overjoyed that this was not going to be one of those times that Sif had mentioned, where he did not understand the reactions to his deceptions. He does care.
"Thank you for apologising," she whispered, as she pulled back from their kiss.
Loki smiled a little, a smile that was almost uncertain. He was still somewhat surprised.
"Just please, don't do that again; not with something that's so important."
He nodded. It was a promise that went against how he normally acted; it went against his very nature. But it was a promise that he was going to try and keep for the sake of his wife.
Author's Note: Well I was planning to get this written by Monday, but a bad day at work and a family dinner out turned into me drinking an awful lot more than I should have, and er, hangover, so... Oh well, c'est la vie. Was nice wine though... :P
Anyway, I hope you guys like it and will let me know what you think. :)
Also, just a warning, I'm going on holiday on the 31st for two weeks, so if I've not updated before then, then I won't be able to until the 14th. :/
I'm off to go and watch Batman now, so woo. :)
Kit xx
