Destiny Decision
Chapter Six
Updated 1/28/10- Fixed a few grammatical/typing errors.
A slippered foot tapped against marble flooring in a soft rhythm, each beat matching the last. There was no other sound heard in the stillness of the darkened room. The blonde-haired girl who was tapping her foot sat in an overstuffed, dark blue chair beside a large bed, an open book in her lap. She didn't look down at the book; she simply tapped her foot and braided a strand of her long hair.
The canopy bed beside her had soft, blue satin drapes pulled down around all four of the posts. A small figure lay huddled underneath the coverlet, and no sound escaped from the girl. Her breath was so quiet that her companion had to pull the drape back occasionally to make sure she was even breathing.
Minako frowned, knowing it was a good time to check on her friend. She dreaded pulling back the drape. Every time she did, Ami would growl at her.
Taking in a soft breath, the princess of Venus gently reached out and inched the satin back slightly to peek in at the girl. Blinking, she listened closely and heard soft, deep breaths coming from the bed. She sighed in relief. Ami was finally going to sleep a little while.
The door to the Mercury princess's bedroom opened and Queen Serenity walked in, shutting the door behind her quietly. She walked up to the bed and glanced at Minako.
"Sleeping." The girl mouthed, and the queen nodded. She motioned for Minako to leave.
Reluctantly, Minako stood from her chair and placed her book on the bedside table. She gave Ami one last glance before slipping out of the room.
Queen Serenity took the seat Minako had occupied and settled in to wait for Ami to awaken.
It was only about half an hour later when the queen heard Ami shuffle around in the bed, signaling that she was awake.
Standing, Queen Serenity pulled back the satin drapes with a loud swoosh and looked down at the girl. Ami let out a startled yelp and covered her face, trying to block out the light.
"Ami, we need to have a talk." The elder woman said sternly, taking a seat on the edge of the bed.
Ami curled her knees to her chest and wrapped her arms around her legs. "Please, your majesty... I..."
"No more excuses, Ami. You have been laying in this bed for weeks." The queen paused and looked at the princess's worn, pale face. "I have been watching you very closely, and I happen to know you are not ill." The woman studied Ami's face closely. "At first I thought it was a cold. That your powers as the senshi of Mercury were transferring to your body in sickness and causing these strange symptoms. But I have watched you and noticed that those are not simply watering eyes. Those are tears, and you seem unable to stop them."
Ami was completely unable to look the queen in the eye. She turned her head away and laid it on her knees.
The Moon Queen sighed. "You're heartbroken, aren't you, my dear?"
Ami flinched and her hands started to tremble. The queen reached out and placed one of her thin, cool hands on top of the girl's.
"Who did this to you, Ami?" Queen Serenity probed gently. "Surely no man could reduce you to such sadness."
Ami was silent for several long moments. She breathed in and out steadily, trying to calm her rapidly beating heart. The queen's hand was soft on hers, and Ami knew she was worried. But... how could she tell her this? She sighed deeply, letting out all the pent up air she had been building up.
"It's not his fault, your majesty." Ami mumbled, burying her blue head in her arms so the queen couldn't see her face. "He had no choice."
The queen raised one perfect eyebrow, chills beginning to spread through her at the young princess's words. "Who is this young man who has broken your heart, princess?" She asked warily. She pulled her hand away from Ami as the young girl stiffened into compete silence. The queen gave her several long moments, and then let out a sigh as she saw she was going to have to use another tactic. "Ami, I demand you tell me."
"Please, your majesty. It would only cause harm." Ami whispered into her lap, and the queen had to strain to hear her.
"I must know."
Ami lifted her head, her face stained with weeks of tears that wouldn't wash away. She stared down at the blue comforter she lay under. Her guest bedroom in the Moon palace was made to remind her of home. The soft blue colors of the room were supposed to comfort her, but they only made her miserable and made her think of the wonderful time she had spent with her love at home, before all of this had occurred and shattered her heart into pieces.
She looked wearily at the ruler of the moon, knowing she couldn't refuse her. She couldn't bring herself to even think his name though, let alone say it. She improvised. "There is no need to tell you, your majesty. You know him and will know him better in the future as he will be a member of your own family."
The queen snapped to a standing position. Her eyes widened considerably, and she stared at Ami in complete astonishment. "Endymion. Please, Ami, tell me no, not Endymion."
The girl looked away.
The elder woman took in a sharp breath of air and clutched at her stomach, leaning over to grasp at one of the bed posts. She'd heard rumors, of course. Scant, but they had been there. She had known it was foolish to sign the treaty, to give away her young daughter's hand when it was very possible that the prince had already signed over his own heart. The Earth King had promised her that Endymion would make Serenity happy. And now look at what that promise had become!
She breathed in air deeply. The King had been adamant about the treaty for his people's sakes. The wars had to end, and the engagement had settled it all. The Earth people were happy, and the Moon people were at complete peace once again. The alliance was meant to bring good things, not cause trouble. What was she to do now?
"Were you... engaged before the treaty?"
Ami nodded slowly, still refusing to look up at the queen. "We... never told anyone at all, though. Please, your majesty, I beg you leave it be. There is nothing to be done and I have accepted my duty above all else. So has he, I believe. I begged of him to accept it."
The queen was silent for several long minutes. She quietly walked away from the bed and stared down at the ground through one of the room's windows. Ami simply sat and sniffled softly, trying not to succumb to tears yet again. What would happen now that the queen knew? She hoped she hadn't just placed Endymion into another mess... but what other choice did she have? When the queen of the Moon requested something of you... you did not refuse.
Queen Serenity finally turned to Ami. "I will speak with Prince Endymion about this matter. I will not let the treaty stand this way."
"But-"
"Ami, do not even begin to try arguing with me." The queen snapped. She saw Ami's eyes widen and her voice softened. "I will deal with this in whatever way I can. I will speak to Endymion, and we will come to a resolution."
"What will happen?" Ami asked in a frightened whisper.
"I will have Endymion decide that."
Ami's eyes widened, and she opened her mouth to speak but no words came out at all.
The queen looked at her sternly, her eyes narrowing into thin slits. "Now please, my dear. Get out of that bed and leave this room. And that is an order!"
Ami nodded numbly.
"Good." She gave Ami one soft smile, and then the queen left the room. Once in the hall with the door closed behind her, she motioned to her head servant, who had been waiting for her. "Ready the next transport as soon as possible. I need to go to Earth. Immediately."
The servant nodded and fled down the hall. Queen Serenity simply watched him go, her mind in a maze of concerns. What would Serenity say to this? She'd been spending an awful lot of time with Endymion, and from the girl's letters, it had sounded as if she were falling for him. This was indeed going to throw everything into a messy ordeal. But how was there any way to avoid it? She could not just ignore it and allow the engagement to proceed if Endymion was holding feelings for the princess of Mercury.
She frowned. Prince Endymion's duty to be the protector of her daughter was one of the utmost importance to her. He was the only prince of planetary royal blood. He was the only one with any chance of being able to protect Serenity and the Ginzuishou once she herself could no longer hold it.
She had to speak to Endymion urgently. If anything could be done, it would have to be very soon.
Princess Serenity wandered around the Earth palace aimlessly. She sighed in frustration at the sound of the pouring rain outside. It was keeping her locked in all day, and she hated it. She walked into the main foyer for the third time that day and stared out one of the wide, glass windows that spread across the room on each side of the large double doored entrance. She tapped her foot restlessly, leaning her small hands on the glass. Watching the rain fall, she felt a small whimper leave her mouth before she heard it.
From behind her, she heard a low chuckle. Spinning on her heels, she saw Prince Endymion leaning against one of the staircase banisters and grinning at her, his arms crossed and blue eyes sparkling in humor.
"It's just a little rain, Serenity."
She jumped slightly in the air when a loud clap of thunder sounded outside. She clutched her arms together. "A little rain? It's been storming all day."
"It does that here sometimes." He walked up to her and gazed down into her frightened face. Her blue eyes were wide and she cringed at even the softest rumble of thunder in the distance.
"How will such a fragile girl ever withstand being the holder of the Ginzuishou...?" He murmured.
She blanched. "I don't like to think about that."
Endymion tilted his head and frowned at her, furrowing his brow. "It's your duty. You're the Moon heir."
She sighed and stared down at her hands, entwining her fingers together. "I know. I am always conscious of it, of course. I just prefer to not think of it until the time comes that Mother has to pass it on to me." She paused. "I have my senshi to help me. I should be fine."
"You're afraid of it?" He whispered softly, watching as several different emotions passed across her face before she answered.
"Sometimes." She answered slowly. She looked up at him. "Wouldn't you be? If you were to possess the most powerful object in the universe?"
He blinked, realizing he had never thought of it that way. Queen Serenity had never showed any kind of reluctance when she had to use the Ginzuishou for any purpose... but then again, it had been a very long time since she had been required to use it at all. But Princess Serenity was softer, and he wondered now if his duty was not only protect her from outside forces... but from her own powers? He frowned deeply, staring at the top of the girl's blonde head. Could it be possible that the Ginzuishou was powerful enough to harm her.... or kill her even? He felt chills course through his body at the thought. Reaching out, he pulled her to him and hugged her close to his chest.
Serenity was confused. He hadn't touched her in days, ever since he had told her of the possible ending of their engagement. And now he was holding her as if he was terrified to let her go?
Endymion said nothing; his mind was lost in thought. Was it even conceivable that he could protect her from something so powerful as the Ginzuishou? He had few abilities at all, if any. He had always had a slight touch of psychometry his entire life, flickers of it really... and he had always healed quickly without ever knowing why. But how would that ever help Serenity? He'd never been able to transfer any healing abilities away from himself. And what little flickers of a psychological link he had been able to hold with anyone else as a child had never strengthened. He rarely felt a thought pass through him from someone else. It happened so rarely that he often thought it was just his imagination. The only reason he had ever thought he might even have the ability was because his mother had told him as a child of her own ability to do so.
He snapped out of his thoughts when he felt Serenity tugging on his sleeve. He blinked and glanced down at her. She was staring up at him curiously, one eyebrow raised as a confused look crossed over her face. He cleared his throat. "I'm sorry, Serenity. I was just worrying about you."
She blinked. "Worrying about... me? Whatever for?"
He laughed. "The Ginzuishou isn't something to take lightly."
"No, of course not. But you need not worry." She smiled. "As I said, I have my senshi. And I'm stronger than I look."
He tightened his hold on her unconsciously. "You also have me."
Serenity gazed at him unwaveringly, not daring to let her eyes blink. "Endymion..."
He kissed her forehead softly and pulled away, letting his arms drop to his sides. "I can't help but care about you, Serenity." He shifted his eyes toward the windows. "No matter how hard I try, I can't stop myself from caring."
"Why do you not want to care about me?" She furrowed her brow together. "I don't understand."
"It's complicated." He muttered, deciding to leave the conversation at that. A lull surrounded the room as Serenity tried to figure out what he was meaning, and he refused to say another word.
A servant came in through the main doorway, dripping wet.
"Fredrick!" Endymion exclaimed in surprise. "What are you doing coming through this way? You're soaked! You should have gone through the servants' entrance!"
"I'm sorry, your grace. The Moon Queen is here though." He hadn't closed the door, and now he gestured outside to where a woman was coming forward, holding her skirts up in the rain, several servants surrounding her with umbrellas held above their heads. The man stood aside and held the door wide open as the entire group entered the main foyer.
Serenity gasped. "Mother!"
The woman looked up and smiled warmly to her daughter, gesturing for her to come forward. Serenity did so, but stopped just a step short of hugging her mother.
"You're... all wet."
The queen narrowed her eyes.
Endymion tried to stifle a laugh but failed. Serenity turned with a pout to him, and he grinned back at her. Walking forward, he greeted the queen with a low bow. He stood up again before speaking. "We weren't expecting you, your majesty."
"No, Endymion, but I need to speak with you urgently. A letter would not do at all." The queen looked pointedly at him.
Confused, Endymion tilted his head. "Of... course, your majesty."
"Once I dry off, that is."
"I'll... have Fredrick prepare a room for you." He glanced at the man, who nodded and quickly left the room.
"Mother, what's wrong?" Serenity asked worriedly, twisting her hands together in front of her.
"Nothing you need to concern yourself about right now, dear. It is for Endymion and myself to settle."
Serenity wondered secretly to herself if her mother was here to berate Endymion for thinking of ending the engagement. She didn't dare voice her thoughts.
Fredrick entered the room again. "Your majesty, rooms have been prepared for you."
The queen nodded. She looked at Endymion. "One hour."
"My study." He mumbled, and watched as she left the room in a rush, lifting her wet skirts. He glanced down at the princess, who was also watching her mother leave.
"Any idea what this is about?"
"Maybe she's here to talk to you about how you want to end the engagement?"
"Only Father knows about that, and I've still made no decision regarding it."
Serenity said nothing, only nodded.
He sighed and ran a hand through his black hair. "I suppose I will see in an hour."
Queen Serenity entered the prince's study in exactly one hour, just as she had said.
"Does your father know I'm here?" She said when the servants closed the doors behind them.
Endymion shook his head, leaning against his desk. "No. I wasn't sure if this was a confidential meeting or not."
"It is. This is your decision and I want no sway from him to influence you."
Endymion raised an eyebrow at the woman standing in front of him. She stood tall and straight, her long silver hair muted only slightly by the dim light that was given off by the fire in the fireplace. He couldn't help but compare her strength to Serenity's. It wasn't that the princess was weak... she just wasn't as strong as this woman.
"What is this about, your majesty?"
"I have spoken with Princess Ami." She said shortly, gazing back at Endymion with a meaningful stare.
Endymion felt like falling, but he didn't dare to make a move.. He took in a sharp breath of air and paled, his eyes staring widely across to the woman. He said nothing.
She turned and faced away from him, going to the fireplace at the side of the room. She stared down at the burning flames for a moment before speaking again. "She has been laying in bed for weeks, and everyone believed her ill. However.. I have watched her and... I know a broken heart when I see one." She shot him a sharp glance before turning again. "I finally spoke to her today and forced her to tell me what had happened. I don't wish to know the details. I know what it necessary, and that is that you were in love and engaged without anyone's knowledge."
"Queen Serenity, I..."
"Let me finish, Prince." The queen crossed her arms behind her back. "Serenity's safety is the most important thing to me in the world. You are the only prince of planetary royal blood. You have the best chances of keeping her safe. However..." She paused. "It is obvious that you had no idea of this possible duty becoming yours. I would very much enjoy berating your father for such a lackluster education of the duties of a planetary prince. Especially as it seems you are the only one gifted to us in this generation. One the one hand, it will give us a very strong guard of Sailor Senshi. On the other... the princes of lesser ranks, within all the planets' countries, hold no chance of power, and therefore are not as strong."
Endymion remained quiet. He watched as she seemed to argue with herself for a moment before going on.
"But I have come to the decision that it is only fair if I give you the choice."
He blanched. "Your majesty?"
She sighed. "I fear Serenity has been falling in love with you. Her letters are terrifying me now that I think back. At the same time, Ami's condition has been concerning me as well. There is no way I can subject myself to causing her any more pain, as it was my fault to begin with for signing the treaty. I've now caused one of my daughter's senshi heartbreak, and the possible broken heart of my own beloved daughter. I have made a mess of things." She sighed again, more deeply. "I beg of you to find a way to remedy this in whatever way you see fit. I will void the treaty as it is, if you wish. Your father will not be happy with me..." She winced. "But I will deal with him myself, and we will come to different terms. He wants this engagement more than I do, so as for the rest, you will have to deal with that."
Endymion was quiet for several long moments. He walked up and joined her at the fireplace. Standing side by side, they stared into the flames.
She was laying the decision on him solely. All of the thoughts that had been swirling through his mind for the last few weeks came crashing down on him at once. His breath quickened and he leaned his arm over the mantel, keeping himself standing. He wanted to end the engagement. He wanted to go back to Ami. But Serenity...
He looked into the fire and couldn't help but picture her lovely face... a face full of fear at the thought of being the holder of the Ginzuishou. He didn't know how to help her. Nor did he understand why he felt a strong pull toward her whenever he did happen to think of her being in danger. Could one's sense of duty really be so strong? He blanched as he suddenly realized that everything Ami had tried to tell him before was true. Duty really did come first, and if he turned his back on it now... it would haunt him for the rest of his life. His stomach felt sick at the thought. Yet he knew it was true.
Finally, he spoke. "What if I don't wish the treaty broken?"
She blinked and stared at him. "You... want to marry Serenity?"
He sighed.
She waited, watching him fight for words.
"I fell in love with Princess Ami, and I will continue to love her for the rest of my life. There is no escaping that, nor do I ever wish to subject my heart to the pain of trying to." He glanced at her. "But I cannot simply turn my back on my one duty in life. And I have come to care for Serenity a great deal..." He paused. "Perhaps... even love her as well."
The queen didn't speak.
Endymion's eyes shifted to the side, tears threatening to well up, but he forced them back. "Ami is even more dedicated to her duty as a senshi than I could ever be to my duty. She is courageous, self-sacrificing, strong willed, and good. I admire every aspect of her commitment to what was placed on her at birth. She didn't argue once for me to end the engagement. She didn't beg it of me to find a way; I put that on myself and tried desperately to persuade my father into finding another way to make a treaty. Then Serenity showed up, and I couldn't help but come to care for her... and her safety. She tries not to show it, but she is scared of the future and the task of handling the Ginzuishou. And I..." He closed his eyes. "I came to find out that she had, in fact, fallen in love with me. I didn't even have an inkling of a clue."
He turned himself to face her. "If I am to remain at all at peace with myself, I cannot possibly turn my back on the duty placed on me. I lose the one thing most important to me... but..." He paused. "I learned from Ami that duty comes first. I didn't want to listen, but... now I know there is no turning my back on it even though I wish I could remain with her."
"There is no good solution here." Queen Serenity muttered softly.
"No, there isn't. I lose something no matter what I do. But this is the only solution that I can see as perceivable." He took a deep breath. "If I may propose a verbal agreement between us, I have a few requests."
She raised an eyebrow, but nodded.
He looked into the fire. "I beg you not to allow Serenity to ever have knowledge of my engagement to Princess Ami. You, Ami, and I are the only ones to know of it at all. If she were to ever find out, it could very well jeopardize her friendship with Ami, and I could not bear to have either of the girls hurt or separated by this."
The queen nodded. "I agree with that. There is no reason at all for it to be brought up again."
"And I want Ami to leave the Moon palace immediately and go home."
Queen Serenity raised an eyebrow. "Whatever for?"
"I wish to visit her on Mercury once more before my marriage."
She didn't say anything for a few moments. Then, slowly, she nodded. "You will take it as your responsibility to explain this agreement to her?"
"Yes, of course."
"Then I will agree."
"I would suggest allowing the other princesses to return home as well. She may not like it, but Serenity might find it odd that all of them are there except Ami. And that I am missing as well."
"I will have only Rei stay with her for a time. I don't wish her to be separated from all of her senshi. Serenity craves constant companionship."
He smiled and couldn't help but chuckle at that. "I have noticed."
The queen smiled weakly. Then, she turned to face him. "I am grateful to you, Prince."
He shook his head. "Don't be. This was my decision. You gave me a chance to escape destiny, and I could have taken it without a backwards glance." He frowned. "But I doubt I would be able to live with myself that way. Or that Ami would ever agree to let me live that way." He laughed sourly. "I've been thinking about this for weeks. Even if I did happen to escape duty, there would be no way Ami could escape hers. We were doomed from the beginning." He smirked. "Believe me when I say I've been tangling the thoughts around my head hopefully... with no luck at all."
Queen Serenity turned and headed toward the door. "I will say goodbye to Serenity and return to the Moon.. Ami will be on Mercury within days, and when I call for Serenity, you may leave for your trip. I implore you not to stay but a few days. You will be needed back on the Moon very soon. Serenity will want you there, I'm sure."
He didn't turn away from the fire. He simply nodded.
"And Endymion..."
He turned. The queen had her hand on the knob of the door, facing him with stern eyes.
"Be faithful to my daughter after your trip."
She closed the door behind her.
Later that night, Serenity sat on a stone bench in the rose garden. The sky was finally clear of clouds and the moon had risen high in the sky. She stared up dreamily at her home, her hands clasped together in her lap.
"How did I know I would find you here?"
She didn't turn. She simply smiled. "Because I haven't been able to come here all day."
Endymion walked up behind her, leaning over her shoulder to stroke a white rose against her cheek. Blushing, she reached up and took it from him. She smiled and motioned for him to sit beside her.
Once seated, he looked up. "It must be odd for you to look at the moon this way?"
"Yes... but it's nice, so I don't mind." She ran the rose against his hand softly. "Mother left hours ago. I haven't seen you."
"I was with Father."
She winced. "Mother wouldn't tell me what it was she talked to you about."
"She need not tell you. Nothing more than finalizing the engagement details. Not something you'd be interested in. Boring stuff, really."
"It would be quite like Mother to make trivial matters something important." She rambled. Her eyes widened suddenly and she turned. "Finalizing the engagement? But I thought..."
He smirked jokingly at her. "I'm sorry, princess, but you're stuck with me."
A small smile quirked at her lips. "Shouldn't I be saying that to you, then?"
"I wouldn't say that. I'm pleased, honestly."
"You are?"
He looked at her wide, shocked blue eyes and smiled softly, nodding. "Yes, Serenity."
She beamed and slipped her hand into his, turning back to look up at the moon again.
It was quiet for several minutes before another thought entered her mind. "Endymion... will you tell me what it was that made you want to end our engagement?"
He pursed his lips together. "I doubt it."
"I would really like to know." She pressed herself against his arm, her lips coming together in a soft pout.
He looked at her determined face and decided he had better deal with this now so he wouldn't have the subject come up again. Then suddenly, a thought came to him.
"If I kiss you, will you promise not to ever ask me that again?"
She raised an eyebrow and pulled her hand away, crossing her arms. "One kiss? You have to be joking." She turned to face away from him.
He rolled his eyes. "Okay..." Another thought. He grinned. "What about a million kisses, one for every single time you're ever annoyed at me?"
She peeked over her shoulder at him, and he saw that both of her eyebrows had shot up. "I can already tell that's going to happen often, Endymion. And who's to say I want you to kiss me, especially when I'm annoyed?" She turned again to face him.
"What about that blush across your face?"
"You're already annoying me, Endymion."
"That's what I was aiming for."
She turned a brighter shade of pink at his implication. "That's not fair. I didn't promise anything."
"But you will, because now you're too tempted not to."
"That's just cruel!" She huffed and crossed her arms. Grumbling to herself, she thought about it carefully. Watching her animated face, he grinned. He'd won. He could see it already.
She peeked at him from the corner of one eye. "May I change the deal?"
He raised an eyebrow. "Maybe?"
She uncrossed her arms and cautiously reached out for one of his hands again. "What if... you kiss me anytime you ever want to?"
He smiled softly. "I think I like that more."
"You're never going to kiss me then, are you?" She rolled her eyes.
He chuckled and cupped her cheek with his hand, shutting her up as her mouth closed with a snap. Shock registered across her face briefly as he leaned down to press his lips to hers softly.
"Serenity..." He whispered moments later as he watched her glazed eyes.
"Mmm?"
"You are putting me in grave danger of loving you."
Ami paced back and forth across the science library. Nothing looked interesting; nothing enticed her. She had never, not once, wanted to stop studying. Yet she couldn't seem to find a single interesting topic that could pull her out of her sour mood.
She sighed irritatedly and fell back into a chair. Putting her feet up on a low table (no one else was in the room so she really just didn't care about decorum at the moment), she leaned back and propped her cheek on her fist.
Why had Queen Serenity ordered her home? It made no sense, unless the queen really was sick of her 'illness'. She'd been acting well since she had confronted her, though! She'd gotten up, gone out, played games with the girls... she'd even attempted conversation and tried to play it off as just being tiredness when she could find nothing at all to say. They all gave no notice, thinking she was still in recovery from her long sickness.
But now she felt restless, just sitting here at home. She didn't know what was going on. Would Queen Serenity really end the engagement of the princess to Endymion? Wouldn't that completely throw things out of order? Since the whole ordeal had started, Ami had begun to reflect on how stupid it really was of her to fall for the only planetary prince there was. Of course he would be meant for the Moon princess. How folly of her, indeed. Even if Queen Serenity would end the engagement... wouldn't Endymion, out of his own obligation and duty, remain true to the destiny set out for him?
She sat up in the chair, plopping her feet on the ground. It was ridiculous really, all of it. Being in love made no sense. The feelings had flooded through her and left her weak and vulnerable. Then the pain had come, and she'd been crippled so low that she'd felt as if her entire world had crashed around her and she was left alone at the bottom, only to have a weight continuously crush her down so that she had no chance of getting back up.
Love was, indeed, a terrifying experience. One she wasn't sure if she wanted to repeat. She'd loved and loved hard for even a short time, and now the emptiness from the lack of it made her feel dead on the inside.
She stood up, blinking at her own idiocy and fear. She wrapped one arm around herself. She wouldn't do it again. She had to have meaning. Meaning was the key, and if she had no meaning, she would sink back down into that crushing bottom where she had been. And she knew she had a meaning for her life right there in front of her.
She had a duty to fulfill.
She looked around at the books around her. She was the most likely senshi to be able to protect the princess with knowledge. She would be damned before she let anything bad come to Serenity by means of lack of information.
Ami went up to the first shelf she saw, yanked out a book, and flipped to the first page.
Her mission started today.
The girl in front of Endymion looked like Ami.
She even smelled like Ami. It was the usual mixture of berries and vanilla, a combination that he loved.
She even sounded like Ami, in some ways. Her voice was the same, except... it was even softer now than it had been before. It was softer, yet... more determined. She was short with words and to the point. And she didn't smile at him at all. That was the main difference. She would not give him anything more than a wide-eyed, straight faced look. That is, when she actually looked at him. Which had been exactly... two times in the three hours he'd been sitting there.
The queen of Mercury looked back and forth between her daughter and the prince of Earth worriedly. They weren't speaking at all, though it was obvious to her that Endymion's whole point in visiting was to speak to Ami. She pursed her lips together in thought for a moment, and then she stood from her chair. This had been going on long enough.
"Husband, I believe there is a matter we need to attend to promptly." She looked pointedly at her husband, who simply continued to look down at his book.
The man looked up at her briefly with a bored expression. "Must we right now, dear?"
"Yes." She said sharply, glaring at him.
Sighing, the King of Mercury stood and let his wife drag him out of the sitting room. The Queen glanced over her shoulder, giving Endymion an encouraging glance.
Ami turned the page of her book. She sat perched on the edge of a settee, her blue dress trimmed in an even darker blue ribbon trailing around her softly. It was the same dress that she had worn the first day they had met, and that didn't help matters at all, Endymion thought.
She didn't look up. She sniffed.
Endymion waited a few moments more, and then he stood from his chair to make his way over to the settee. Sitting down beside her, he gazed over her, trying to get her to look away from the book without having to say anything.
She turned to another page.
He sighed and ripped the book out of her hand. "Ami, this is ridiculous. Talk to me, damn it."
The girl folded her hands in her lap and looked up at him with the same blank expression. "There isn't really much to say, though."
"There is a lot that I have to say."
Ami stood and walked away to the middle of the room where she clasped her hands behind her back. She didn't say anything.
He sighed. "Ami... I know how hurt you really were after I had to return to Earth. The queen disclosed... well... everything to me. We came to an agreement, and it is only because of that agreement that I'm allowed to be here with you right now."
She didn't move.
He stood and cautiously started to move toward her. "I will always, always love you, Ami."
He reached out and put a hand on her shoulder. She flinched, then froze. She stood stiffly, but pulled her arms around in front of her.
"I have to marry Serenity, though." He whispered.
"It is your duty... your destiny. Of course." She whispered. She turned around to face him, and her eyes were filled with tears. Finally, her hard front had broken. She laughed miserably. "I told you that from the beginning, Endymion. Could you not have just listened to me then? I was dealing with it the best way I knew how. I'd never been in love before. How could I know that it would be so powerful? Powerful enough to break me?" She clutched her hands together. "I will get over you. But damn you for coming back here just to tell me you have to marry my best friend when I knew that already. Even when the queen said she would end the engagement if you wished, I knew you would not. For one, you have a duty to uphold." She wiped furiously at her eyes and smiled weakly at him. "Finally, it seems you have grasped that. Duty comes first. It is the way it has always been, and we learn to accept that at a young age. It took you an awfully long time, though, Endymion." She smirked wryly.
He was about to say something, but clamped his mouth shut when he realized he had no idea how to reply to that. She was right, of course. He hadn't listened to her; he'd gone ahead and tried to save their relationship instead of taking his responsibilities seriously. Of course she might be peeved at him for that... it was very typical of Ami to have her logic win out over anything else.
Ami sniffled softly in front of him. "You'll love Serenity. It's hard not to love her." She smiled a teary smile at him. "I don't say she is my best friend for no reason, after all. We all love her. You will too."
"I will always love you more." He murmured, reaching out to her. She didn't flinch away this time. She went into his arms willingly, sighing sadly.
"It would be so much better for me if I could push you away."
"You can get over me later." He whispered, laying his head on top of hers. "I dread when I have to see you marry someone else."
She laughed almost bitterly. "I've already decided to completely dedicate myself to knowledge. I will not fall in love again."
"You will. I dread the day, but you will." He lifted her chin with his thumb. "No matter who he is, he'll never love you more than I do."
"You'll never love Serenity more?" She whispered.
"Never." Tears slipped out of her eyes and he wiped them away with his free hand. "Promise me you'll give love another chance."
"Endymion..."
"Now, now... you can do this one little request... don't close yourself off." He kissed the corner of her mouth. "You have too good of a heart to just close it off and never give anyone else a chance because I happen to be an idiot."
She laughed half heartedly. "I believe I'm the fool for falling in love with the only prince the Moon princess can marry."
"We were both foolish."
"Do you wish we hadn't fallen in love?"
He shook his head. "No, I would never take it back. Every single moment was happier to me than anything else in life ever could be. Do you?"
"As much as it hurts now, no." She smiled weakly. "I would never want to go back either."
He stroked her skin with his thumb for a moment. "It would be bad for both of us if I stayed, wouldn't it?"
She sighed. "Very." She closed her eyes at his touch on her face. "You can't stay." She whispered the words so softly he could barely hear them.
"When I leave... we can't ever see each other like this again."
"I know."
"And Serenity can never know."
"I know."
He was silent for a moment. "There was no point in me saying anything at all."
"No point at all." She smiled and opened her eyes. "Duty comes first to me. I have no need for warnings."
He leaned down and kissed her then, being unable to hold out any longer.
When Ami pulled away from him, she pulled herself completely out of his arms and backed away. He started to go toward her again, but she held out a hand and shook her head, her blue eyes unusually dark and filled with tears threatening to spill over at any moment. "If we don't let go now, we'll stay here for much longer than we should."
Reluctantly, he dropped his arms to his sides and nodded numbly. "I take it that I should go now."
Ami looked a the door and the tears started to fall. "Yes. It... would be the best idea."
He looked at the door too, and then looked back at her. "I love you."
"I love you, too."
He headed toward the door and opened it, turning back and giving her one last look filled with longing before closing the door softly behind him.
The tears fell down her face in waves, and she was completely unable to stop them. Finally, she just let it sink in that they weren't going to stop anytime soon, and she sunk to the floor in a heap, allowing herself to let it out one last time.
PRESENT
Mamoru and Ami woke up at the same time on the next morning. It was 6A.M., cloudy, and dark outside. It was obvious that it had been raining already, and it looked like it could start pouring down again at any moment.
Mamoru stumbled out of bed to his balcony and ripped open the door, rushing out and gasping for breath. He leaned his head over the railing, closing his eyes.
Ami slid open the window beside her bed and stuck her head out, gulping in air. She reached up a hand to her face and realized that her face was wet with tears.
They both looked up and both knew the other had to have had the same exact dream. And neither one of them had any clue why they knew. They just knew.
End Chapter Six
I know, it wasn't quite as long as the last one, but I wanted to stop there. I promise, next chapter will be dedicated to the present. I know I spent all of this chapter in the past and I hope no one is too disappointed!
