Terra:
Terra looked over at Kal who was catching some extra sleep on a nearby rock. Team Minotaur had been keeping them waiting for close to an hour now. Standing underneath the shade of a tree, she had a nice view of the rolling hills surrounding them. Old Russia wasn't hospitable by any means, but having a nice vista to look at while they were waiting for inconsiderate friends was comforting at least.
"At least there's one good thing about the wait." Marvin commented as he walked back towards them. "I've been meaning to harvest spin metal for an age, but just haven't had time. I've gotten several dozen now."
Marvin's spoke loud enough to disturb the sleeping Titan, something that even the nearby gunfire couldn't do.
"And I picked up a few patrol missions too- shouldn't be much longer till I get something from the War Cult for helping them. Then I can switch this thing out for a bond that actually has holographic style."
The sound of a nearby gang of sparrows caught their attention.
"About time." Marvin commented. "You'd think at least one of their ghosts would've had a working clock."
Darla was the first to roll up on a purple and black sparrow that Terra noticed Marvin staring at jealously. "Hey, sorry we are late. Cayde-6 asked us to do a recon for a strike they have been planning."
"I told you we should've sent them a message." Ergerox commented.
"Oh they're big boys and girls. I'm sure they've found some way to entertain themselves. Maybe drawn pictures in the dirt or contemplate life's purpose. Little things like that," Declan quipped.
"Mostly I collected spin metal or killed fallen." Marvin shrugged. "I don't like inaction."
"That's a good lesson if I ever heard it. You ever sit still in a battlefield, you're liable to get your head shot clean off by people like Darla," Declan said.
"Of course, we tend to bounce back from things like that, but doesn't mean it doesn't sting."
"So, where is Kal?" Darla asked, looking between Terra and Marvin.
"Sleeping on the job." Marvin responded, pointing, and tossing a grenade in his other hand. "Someone else want to wake him up, or can I do it?"
"You realize he'll kill you if you do that, right?" Ergerox crossed her arms with an amused expression on her face.
"I got this." Darla said, pulling a grenade out of her pocket. "What do you think? Should I do a level one or two?"
"I was thinking I'd toss a fusion grenade near his head- loud enough to wake him up, but wouldn't do much to hurt him at that distance...or sticking it to his foot and watching him hop around in pain. I liked that option too."
"Yeah, but an arc bolt will give him just the right jolt to awaken." Darla set her grenade and tossed it over right next to Kal.
The grenade scanned the area and made a ping noise that made the guardian lift his head before getting zapped. "Ouch! What the hell, guys?"
"For the record, she did it this time, not me." Marvin said, storing his grenade.
"Only cause she beat you to it." Ergerox chuckled.
"You really should wake up and stay awake." Darla suggested.
"Sorry, I had an EXO in my apartment that made whirrs and clicks all night and then a Awoken, who talks in his sleep!" He sat up rubbing his head.
"...I did not talk in my-" "Yes yOU diiiid. It kePt me up too."
"All he could talk about was studying about some weapon called Thorn." He stood up and stretched. "I figured it was a weird nickname for his dick."
"Hmm...Declan, do Warlocks typically study things that don't exist?" Ergerox asked him.
"Only if they're crazy. Or really, really bored," Declan replied.
"So, this team building meeting is off to a great start." Marvin said sarcastically. "Can we at least get to the fun part where we shoot at things or blow them with grenades?"
"Oh Marvin, nothing so crass. We're warlocks. Blowing them up with magic is so much more fun, isn't it?" Declan snickered.
"I prefer the term 'incineration'. But I guess they die regardless of what it's called."
"Well, this is all fine but back to the actual meeting." Darla walked over and sat on a rock near Kal. "Okay, first off, I am very Adept at using scout rifles and supplementing my short and mid range needs with a fusion rifle. My standard heavy is a heavy Machinegun. My main afluence is arc. Ergerox, tell them what you use."
"Pulse rifle mostly. Sniper Rifle against the darkness, shotgun in Crucible. Rocket Launchers. Void."
"Declan, you're up." Darla prompted.
"Oh I'm pretty partial to adding 800 new orifices a minute into our enemies. Autorifles are such beautiful little things really. Shotguns work for me as well. If you're going to kill someone, why not make it personal? As for heavy, eh rocket launchers have always been a charming way to say 'Fuck you' to whatever poor bastard's in your sights," Declan said.
They all looked at Terra since she was the designated 'leader' for the team.
"We keep two handcannons on me always. We can go longer without reloading. Shotgun for close range and incendiary grenades to scatter Fallen. Heavy machine gun in case we get swarmed," she said.
"We?" Marvin questioned. It sounded like he'd noticed her doing it before as well.
"It's none of your concern, Marvin. I suggest you drop it. Now," Terra replied.
"Yeesh, defensive much? Thought that was supposed to be more her job." He nodded towards Ergerox.
"By that logic, her job is to blow you up with a grenade, which it kinda sounds like she wants to do." The titan replied.
"...You make an excellent argument."
"Keep on track guys. Marvin." Darla said, dropping her casual tone to take on an all business persona.
"Well, fire type, obviously. Machine Guns since they last longer, fusion rifles for a mix of range and power, and now that I've got this number upgraded-" he held up the handcannon he'd gotten from the speaker. "Handcannon all the way...or scout rifle, if this doesn't cut it."
"You mEAn if you cAN't figuuuure out how to uSe it effectively?"
"...Yes."
"I guess that means it's our turn." Sally said, appearing over Kal's shoulder. "Kal uses mostly auto rifles or pulse rifles depending on what is appropriate for the occasion and what I have in stock. Primarily he uses his shotgun and heavy machine gun since he spends most of his money on heavy ammo synthesis. Other than that, he uses arc damage and occasionally… much as I hate to admit it, me as a weapon."
"...You as a weapon." Ergerox repeated flatly. "How?"
"It was one time." Kal pointed out, rubbing the back of his neck in shame.
"He grabbed me when I was trying to spawn him ammo because he was out and threw me at the fallen so hard that I embedded in its skull. The stains from the blood were so horrible that I made him get me this new shell."
Lothos and Marvin exchanged a look, as if the Warlock was considering doing something similar to the ghost next time he was annoyed, and the ghost was threatening to drop a sparrow on his head if the guardian tried it.
Declan began clapping his hands, nodding in approval.
Ergerox just sighed and sat down on a rock nearby. "So, what now?"
Kal:
Darla walked into the center of the group. "Okay, as we all know so long as we have two attributes working together, we can get more damage per attack. Meaning, we should team up with people with like types. For instance, Declan and Ergerox, Terra and Marvin, and Kal and I."
Kal let Darla go on about how that would be good technique but something in the back of his mind pushed him to speak. "Actually, Darla, while I respect your ideals for a dual system. I think you are going about this all wrong."
"I actually find myself agreeing with him, for different reasons." Marvin commented. "If the goal is for both teams to work together, it doesn't quite make sense to have two members of the same team working together for this."
KAl looked over to Marvin and gestured to him with his hand. "Agreed, but what I was thinking is that we have to have the weakest members with the strongest. While, I'm sure you don't have my exact strength, it seems like I would be better suited to sticking with Declan."
Darla seemed to freeze in place and there was no way Kal could read her since she was wearing a helmet. "What?"
"He has a point, actually." Marvin said, and it seemed like he was smirking behind his helmet, though Kal had no idea why.
"No offense, Kal. But I kind of want to keep my distance. Titans kind of...work up a sweat if you catch my drift," Declan said while wafting a hand over his nose.
"I know what I smell like durrin' battle. And by all means, keep on the other side of the room or hallway but we can easily lock down an area with my Fist of Ham hocks discharge ability."
Sally appeared over Kal's shoulder. "Kal, it's fist of havok not ham hocks. And the other ability is after shock. Please think about what you are referring to before you say it. I don't think you hit the ground and make food."
"Though I got to admit, that does sound more useful," Declan quipped.
"Especially with one of those hotheads to cook it with a fire grenade." Ergerox's ghost said, appearing for a moment with a cackle and then disappearing.
Kal grunted and continued. "If I use that and he uses his Novelty Bomb with the vortex. We can lock down a control point."
"Nova bomb." Marvin coughed. "Although the same argument could be made with mine Radiance and Solar grenades. Enough of those grouped together can limit their movements, but gives more flexibility since you don't just have one shot."
Darla seemed to sag her shoulders a bit but conceded. "Alright, that is a valid point. We'll split into groups that can complement each other across the spectrum. Egerox and Terra should make a decent team, especially since golden gun and weapons of light. Marvin and I since our sustained abilities can push the enemy back big time. Then, Kal and… Declan, for Kal's reasons." She paused before the last bit seeming to glare at Kal.
"I feel like you're punishing me, Darla."
"That's how I feel about the Speaker putting me with him." Marvin chuckled.
"So, are we gonna practice then, trade equipment, or just stand here and get to know each other?" Kal asked confused of what the actual goal of their meeting was.
"Well, the Crucible is running Control today for practice so I was figuring we'd head in and get this team born in hell fire."
"So then, we just split off into the teams once we're in there?" Ergerox asked.
"Fine by me, may the best man win," Terra said as she checked her handcannon.
"Not like that, work with your partner but keep in contact with the team. Never go alone because you will be beaten with greater numbers. Always have a sniper rifle on one of you because distance is key, closing it is an issue."
"Yeah, for some reason, I can hit fallen or hive with a sniper rifle, but other guardians actually have brains, so it's more of an issue…" He glanced at Kal. "Well, most guardians have brains."
Kal rubbed his arm awkwardly and looked off to the side. "Yeah, I'm not too good with snipers either."
"Well you're in luck, meat head. I have enough experience handling one where I can give any Fallen the bad touch," Declan replied.
"Uh, you know that came off as creepy as hell, Declan." Darla said, facepalming.
"Lighten up, Darla. They can't all be winners," Declan replied.
"Last time you used that line, you commented on Ergerox having a flat ass."
"...what." The titan was suddenly holding a magnetic grenade as she glared at the warlock.
"Oh, did I not tell you? Declan has been sizing us up against the other women he sees and then making a point to tell me how we stand." Darla crossed her arms obviously having held this information for a good occasion.
"Oh Ergerox, are you blushing? I never thought EXO's cared much about how they looked. Saving that little tidbit for later," Declan said as he pretended to write it down on his palm.
Ergerox glared at him, and slowly stored the grenade. She then put her arms up as her pulse rifle appeared in them, and shot him in the foot, making him hop around in pain.
"Ah, ah, ah, apparently EXO's can't take a joke either! Ha..ha..ow," Declan hissed.
"Don't make me get the grenades back out." She threatened, slinging the rifle on her back.
"Alright, lets get to our first match. Then, we can have Declan take point for all his comments." Darla got out her ghost and began ordering a call to orbit for the entire team.
Oh my god, they must be a good team to act like this.
Marvin:
"Darla, just saw a pair heading our way, watch our backs." Marvin said as he threw a fusion grenade and ducked behind a boulder as he saw it stick to a titan's helmet, smiling as he heard the explosion a moment later.
"I got'em!" A quick shot from her sniper was followed with a shout of over the comm, "Fuck yeah, motherfucker!"
Terra unloaded every round in her handcannon, downing another hunter as he came around the corner. She primed an incendiary grenade and tossed it at the hunter's corpse, ducking down as a Titan stepped over it and exploded in a maelstrom of fire.
"We're ahead by a bit, but it looks like they're trying to go for point B." Ergerox said.
"Declan and I'll go lock 'er down." Kal said, fire raining in the background.
"Should we push for point A?" Marvin asked.
"Don't get greedy." Ergerox responded. "Trying to take all three is how you get screwed over by their respawns."
"Fuck off Marvin! What the hell did I say before we came into this match, shithead!?" Darla shouted, shots blasting from her rifle.
"I thought that might've been just in regard to the last team." He muttered.
"Don't worry about her, Marvin. Darla gets a little spirited when she's in her groove," Declan said over the comms.
The fellow awoken, dropped down by Martin and pointed toward B. "Looks like the entire team is converging on B, lets get in there and super their collective pussy asses."
"Do you have to curse the entire time we're here?" Marvin muttered, wishing they had some heavy ammo as well. "And they wouldn't take B without some firepower of their own ready. Might be smarter to go for C and hit them from both sides."
"Did I stutter?! They're all moving on B, dumbass. Lets get in there!"
"Alright, alright! Light!" He switched for his fusion rifle as he followed her. Her arcblade should take care of them unless there's a super of their own ready. If there is...well, that's why I keep self revive on. Especially since that whole 'extra defense' bonus is apparently BS.
Darla lit up her blade and lunged forward by swinging her arc blade instead of just running. Immediately two poor bastards got in her way and met an end but the third was ready. The opposing warlock dove to the left just as she swing, leaving her to fly off the ledge just as he blade's power ran out. The hunter gasped and activated her blink, shooting back up on the ledge but just enough so that she could grab it. Half of her was still hanging off.
Marvin quickly ran forward and used a scorch to knock the other warlock towards the ledge, then another blast to tip him forward off of it. He groaned as he suddenly felt something press against the back of his head.
"Should've watched your back dumbass." Was the last thing he heard before a bullet went through his head.
Lothos waited until the three that were left turned their backs, then fiery light surrounded him as Marvin's Radiance activated. He scorched the one that had shot him first, giving him a barrier to ward off the other two's fire as he threw a fusion grenade between them. It curved and stuck to the left one's boot, and the other rolled away so it didn't take them both out. He got a grenade to his head for his troubles as Marvin shot the first one in the head to finish him off.
"And you should've know better than to turn your back on a *dead* sunsinger. Fool."
Darla lifted herself up and stuck a knife into one of their ghosts. "Get on our level, bitch!"
"B's secure." Marvin reported, keeping an eye on the doors for another push. "How are you holding at C?"
"It's C, Marvin." Ergerox sighed. "They're trying to take it because C's the one you want to get. We'll let you know if we need backup. Though they seem to just want to get B because it's closer."
"We've been gunning them down as they come, but it's only a matter of time before they get wise and attack all at once," Terra added.
Marvin glanced at the timer in the corner of his helmet. "They've six minutes left to figure that out."
"Bring it on, dick sucking piss bags!" Darla yelled at the other team, shaking her fist in the air.
"How bout you get off your bitch ass and try to take C you whore!" One of them yelled back.
Oh dear god, if they get in a swearing match, I...well, actually, that might distract them and let us win because time runs out. Then again, they'll probably realize rather swiftly that they won't win a swearing match against her and just go back to shooting at us.
"I would, but I think I got a pretty good view of your cunts from here! Call me sometime and I'll fuck you harder than I am this match!"
"HAHAHA! I'm dying!" Declan laughed.
"...I can't tell if you're swearing at me or flirting." The flat reply came back.
"Guess you been smacked so hard, you wouldn't know what smack talk is, candyass!"
"Not by any of you! An armless dreg would hit harder than you wimps!"
"Says the guy who was smacked off a ledge!" She yelled back, knowing it was the warlock.
Marvin sighed and just sat down by the flag. This is going to go on for a while, I can tell.
"You mean after you were stupid enough to throw yourself off it?"
"At least I was able to watch your ass fall into the river below. I knew you were wet behind the ears but now it's literal!"
"Yeah, too bad it wasn't you that fell in, I can smell you from here! Ever heard of a shower?"
"I'm pretty sure that's actually our Titan, and he's all the way at C, where you're too scared to push for." Marvin threw in.
"Yeah, c'mon guys. I just want to share my bullets with you!" Kal belted from C.
"Get your balls out of your purse and act like men, jackoffs!" Terra said.
"Uh, guys?" Someone else commented. "Shouldn't be, you know, fighting them instead of just yelling?"
"You guys aren't fighting?" Marvin feigned shock as he stood back up in case they actually did try a charge. "I couldn't tell. You've been doing about as well."
"I shot you in the back of the fucking head you prick! How is that not doing well?"
"Look at the score." Ergerox said flatly. "7000 to 3000, our favor."
"Because you fuckheads are just sniping!" A new voice cut in.
"That's only one of us!" Darla shouted. "I've been putting you guys to bed all day. Just lay down and go to sleep. We've won!"
"There's still four minutes left, don't count us out yet!"
"Personally, I counted you out the moment I saw three of you idiots are with Dead Orbit." Marvin scoffed. "Though the 'dead' part fits you rather well."
"Screw this, I'm out of here." Marvin heard someone say, and a moment later a name dropped off the leaderboard on the other team..
"Well shit, if we're down a player and we're this behind. I'm not sticking around either,"
"Come on, guys, don't be assholes. At the very least stick around and get two marks so you get something out of it."
"Yeah, pity marks? Fuck that."
Five more confirmations that people had left the match popped up in Marvin's hud.
"...Did...did we jUSt win becAuse Darla trassssshhhhtaLKed them?"
"It happens more to us than you think, actually," Declan said.
S7: Best chapter ending ever!
T117: Of all time...sorry, couldn't resist.
JAF: This is going to be our legacy. No doubt about it.
S7: Pft, this is Destiny. It's our LEGEND, remember?
T117: Yeah, well the box also 'Cinematic Storytelling' so I'm skeptical of anything it says.
S7: Oh, shit, I think Bungie felt that one.
T117: And yet, we're all still playing it.
JAF: It's tough love. We hurt because we care.
T117: And also there aren't any other games out I really care about at the moment.
JAF: All games need a little love.
T117: Need I mention AC Unity?
JAF: Except that one. That one can die in a hole.
S7: The Order 1886?
JAF: Hasn't really impressed.
T117: Also, Five Nights at Freddy's. That is a game I will watch other people play, but never play myself.
JAF: Really emasculating for me too. I'm not proud to admit the same.
S7: Bitches, I own it and play it. Don't jump at all.
T117:...I never said I jumped at it either. I just suck at strategy games like that.
JAF: I already hated animatronics. Now I always kick them a few times to make sure they won't move.
S7: WTF, do you go in Chucky Cheeses a lot or something?
JAF: You don't? Shit's awesome yo. Never give up your childhood.
S7: I do, it's just I have little brothers that want to go in. You are the youngest sibling in your family.
T117: Never been there, never really wanted to.
S7: That's like going to a strip joint. Ya'gotta go eventually. Even if it's just to see what it's like.
T117:... I don't even know where to begin with how many ways that comparison was wrong.
JAF: What? Don't tell us you've never been to a strip joint either.
T117: Anyway, I think that'll wrap up this chapter. Sayonara.
S7: Get your ass back here! 1473I2.
JAF: Bye-onara!
T117: I think I have to come back just to make fun of Ferret's sign off...still, better than Spike's.
