"What is this place?" Alice asked in surprise, looking around.

Hollis could well imagine what was going through her mind. The first time Severus had brought her here, she had probably looked exactly like her.

The street wasn't particularly long, maybe a couple dozen shops total, but the people were interesting. They were a strange mixture of astonisingly modern (as in, ahead of its time; she would know) Muggle and edgy Wizarding fashion, most had tattoos or piercings, and none of them looked a bit concerned about the war. The atmosphere was light and friendly, and laughter and the murmur of conversation drifted towards them over the low tunes one of the shops was crooning. Strangely dressed kids - several of them sporting unnatural hair colors or streaks - darted around, chasing each other.

"Arcanus Avenue," Hollis repeated. "It's a small community, really, and they're very picky about who they share this street with, so keep it quiet, alright?" Alice nodded. "Whatever you do, never lie to anyone. You can say you don't want to give out that information or simply shake your head, but never lie. Most of these places have charms to detect them and it won't go down well."

Alice nodded again, slower this time. "What are we here for?"

"Quite a bit," Hollis said, starting up the street again. "They have just about everything I'm searching for here, all of it better quality than what you'll find in the main streets of Diagon. Some of it is more expensive, but it's all fair."

Alice stayed mostly silent as Hollis drifted from shop to shop, picking up all the main things she'd need. No one recognized either her or Alice, but she introduced them both to every store owner they met - leaving herself simply as Grey - and never saying who told her about this place. She kept her manner friendly, if a little aloof, and they did likewise. She shopped efficiently, buying only what she couldn't out in the Muggle world.

It took her less than an hour and they ended up at the opposite end of where they started, standing outside a salon and tattoo parlour.

"Ever consider getting one?" Hollis asked, thinking sadly that sooner or later, she'd have to add Severus' death to her list of dates, with a 'B' next to it for Battle, as well as two strikes for Texas and Maine.

"Once," Alice said. "But it was never really my style. Thinking of getting another?"

"Yeah," she said. "I have dates for when all the people closest to me died...But not today," she said decisively. "Not yet."

They turned away and walked back up the street, giving the people they had met nods. Hollis knew word of 'Alice' and 'Grey' would have gone through their little network by nightfall, and while plenty would turn up on Alice - they had some fantastic connections in Arcanus, especially the shop owners who only worked from sunset to sunrise - they would find nothing on her, which, depending on how she played it, could be good or bad.

They left Arcanus Avenue behind and she led them back towards Diagon easily.

"Remember what I said about telling people, Alice," Hollis said. "If you must tell someone, let it be Frank and make sure he knows not to tell anyone else."

"Why? They seem to be doing well, but they could probably use more customers," Alice asked curiously.

"But it'd take away the atmosphere they've created - one of peace and honesty, creativity and acceptance, warmth and security," Hollis tried to explain. "Others would come in and ridicule them - some would be elitists who'd try to drive them off - others would be hateful Death Eaters who'd target their street and homes because of their mixing of Muggle and Wizarding things. Sure, there might be some who'd accept them, who might even love it the way I do, but they're quieter and already trying to protect their own homes - they won't get mixed up in Arcanus business if Voldemort targets them."

"I see," Alice said, nodding thoughtfully. "Alright. I won't tell anyone but Frank - and I'll make it really clear to keep it a secret between us three."

"You're wonderful, Alice, really," Hollis told her, smiling slightly. Out of everyone who could've figured out who she was, Hollis was glad it was Frank and Alice. So far, anyway - it could, she'd admit, change easily.

Alice smiled back warmly. "I'm glad you think so. You're pretty amazing yourself."

"Thanks," Hollis said, hearing the bustle of Diagon come ever closer. "Do you have any shopping to do around the main street?"

"No," Alice said. "But don't you need more clothing?"

"Yeah, but I can get them cheaper in the Muggle world and I generally prefer their style anyway," Hollis said, eyeing Alice's thick winter robes. "You're certainly welcome to come with, but we're going to have to change your outfit..."

"Alright," Alice said agreeably. They went to the Leaky Cauldron and ducked into the downstairs bathroom meant for dining customers and Alice transfigured her underrobe - which was meant to be something like a dress, Hollis supposed; she had never really understood Wizarding fashion - into a long sleeved, deep blue shirt and dark jeans, and her overrobe into a thick coat. Hollis cast a small charm to make her trousers and coat look less leathery. She probably should have cast it earlier, but it had slipped her mind.

Hollis stepped out of the Leaky Cauldron, debating about which direction to go. A lot of things could change in twenty plus years, but there had to be some sort of pawn shop that wouldn't ask her too many questions about her gold somewhere. Which reminded her...She took out two pieces of gold, putting them in her coat pocket, and Silencio-ed the rest so that the whoever owned the shop wouldn't hear the clink and decide to rob her or something.

After a moment, she turned right, figuring she had to start somewhere. It took her forty-one blocks, but she found the perfect store and quickly, with as little information as possible traded, exchanged two galleons, each an ounce of mostly pure gold, for a grand total of nine hundred and eighty-four pounds.

"Wow," Alice said when they left. "I didn't know they could go for that much."

"It varies, depending on the price of gold, but you can usually fetch a decent price for it and it'll only go up in the future because it's so rare," Hollis informed her, pleased with her trade.

They backtracked to a shopping center that they had passed earlier and Hollis had to commend Alice for not complaining about the amount of ground they were treading. Most Wizards were so used to quick transportation that they would be whining and groaning by now. She was also glad it was winter though - if it had been summer, they'd have been miserable.

Hollis didn't like being there, in the shopping center - it was awkward and there were far too many people for her to feel even the slightest bit safe - and she moved quickly, glad that people were too consumed with their own lives to really take note of herself and Alice, who was glancing around curiously, clearly having never been in such a solidly Muggle place before.

Hollis avoided the frilly, girly looking stores and found one that looked reasonable. It was a department store with all kinds of things and, mercifully, the door she entered led right into the woman's section. She had never shopped-shopped before and for a second and she stood there stupidly for a long moment. It seemed so big - where did she start? Perhaps if she broke it down, did it one part at a time, it wouldn't seem so overwhelming. After all, it could hardly be more complicated or difficult than conducting a war.

With that in mind, she set off for undergarments first, snagging a cart to hold everything thing in. It seemed to take ages, but she finally had a basic wardrobe, all of it fairly unremarkable - usually dark colored and made of fairly tough fabrics that wouldn't wear out or stain easily - and she moved onto shoes, picking out two pairs of Converse. They were more or less good for running (short distances) and not too thick to scale things with. She also made sure to get a good pair of running shoes for exercising. She'd always prefer her boots overall, but variety was good.

On a whim, she talked Alice into buying a few Muggle items and insisted she get a pair of Converse.

"This is amazing," Alice whispered, staring at the hundreds of pairs of shoes. "I didn't know Muggles had places like this..."

Hollis chuckled. "Muggles, compared to the Wizarding world, are extremely advanced and very efficient. And they have the larger population."

"You said they helped in your war, right?" Alice asked, glancing around warily. Hollis was less concerned - for all the people that were there, there were few in their section and less than there could be - it was the middle of the day on a school day; the usual teens that flooded the place were all in school.

"Yeah - once they figured out how to get Muggle tech working around and with magic, they did a lot of damage. That and the States getting involved helped put us in a stalemate," she replied grimly. If only they had figured it out sooner, Hollis bet they could have won the war then. A few missles would be all it took...She wished she understood all that technical stuff so she could implement it here, sooner, but it was completely out of her depth.

She bet Severus had understood it though. He seemed to understand everything.

They rolled her cart to the front of the store.

"Is this all for you today, ma'am?" asked the Muggle chasier. It was a young guy, about her age, and he wore a slightly too warm smile. He had nicely mused brown hair, glinting brown eyes, a tan, and a too-white smile. Alice looked mildly amused - he had looked at her, but once she brushed her hair back behind her ear, accidently flashing her wedding ring, he shifted all of his focus to Hollis.

"Yes," Hollis said flatly. He continued to try and start a conversation with her as he rang up their items, but Hollis shut him down wherever she could without being horribly rude.

It was a kind of surreal experience - like, was he really hitting on her? There had been a fair share of romances in the base, but none of them involved her. No one had ever tried to involve her. She was the Field Marshal, the Chosen One, and as such, completely off limits, she supposed. She had thought that there might be some man who tried to snag her, if only for the power of her position, but only one had, back in the early days, and the Aurors she kept around her sent him off quickly. She had barely even noticed, overwhelmed as she was with everything she was suddenly required to know and understand.

Eventually, she got her grasp on the situation, and she kept a sharp eye out, but whatever that man - what had his name been? - said to others, it must have kept them away. Or the Aurors did it. She didn't really know which and, for the most part, she was more than happy to not have to deal with that drama, even if she got lonely. And then Severus had happened and she didn't want anyone else's attention. She found herself comparing the men around her to him and most of them coming up short. Only Maine had ever really leveled out with him, and that was in a more brotherly like way.

Finally, she was able to pay and they made their escape.

"Too soon?" Alice asked gently.

Hollis shrugged. "Partly, I guess. The other part is just bizarre. Being Field Marshal kept most at bay, I suppose. Or I was too young for them and they were too star-struck for me. Something like that, anyway."

"Have you ever kissed a boy?"

Hollis glanced at her, startled. "What?"

Alice looked kind of mischievous. "Have you ever been kissed? Snogged?"

"Alice!" She felt her face start to burn.

"What?" she asked innocently. Hollis shook her head, partly in exasperation and partly as an answer. "Is that a no or are you just shaking your head at me?"

"It's a no," Hollis said. "Even before the war, I was...different from others my age."

A flash of understanding showed in Alice's eyes, her face sobering. "Because of what happened on that Halloween? You surviving when the others didn't?"

"More or less," Hollis said with a nod. It was kind of nice, talking to Alice and not having to watch her words very, very carefully.

Perhaps Severus' way of interacting with the world had been easier - keeping everyone from prying simply because they couldn't take the sarcasm and snark he dished out long enough to ask their questions and, even then, his rude refusals or enigmatic answers kept them from understanding anything of importance.

Alice looked thoughtful and they both jumped when a house-elf appeared in front of them. Hollis immediately swept her eyes around, but no one appeared surprised or alarmed, so he must have hidden himself from their gazes.

Hollis had a theory that, if house-elves had been anything like the goblins and still had their particular form of magic, they'd have conquered the world long ago. The things they could do continuously amazed her.

The elf, an older one with tuffs of white hair growing from his floppy ears, and large blue eyes, gave them a bow that they didn't acknowledge. "Little Master is awake," he reported.

Alice nodded and the elf popped away. "Are you coming home with me or do you still have more to do?"

"My business for now is complete," Hollis said. "The rest will have to wait until after sundown."

Hollis and Alice quickly left the shopping center and walked a couple of blocks to find a deserted ally. Hollis let Alice Apparate them and quickly followed her up the stairs in the foyer. While Alice headed right for Neville's nursery, Hollis turned left, heading to what was currently her room.

How long would she be staying there for? Should she accept their offer and pay them rent or something when she could? She'd have to get a job sooner than later - she couldn't keep asking money from them; her pride wouldn't let her.

The sight of the blue with the sunlight streaming in the window made her sigh. It was very peaceful and Hollis lowered her shields, having half-forgotten that she had tightened them at the Potters' house.

For a long moment, she could only stand still, sorting through her jumbled, held back emotions. Her eyes closed and she breathed slowly and deeply, like Severus had taught her.

God, how she missed him.

She had rarely seen him, but she had known he was alive, that he'd be in contact. Now, she constantly lived with the fact that he wasn't and he wouldn't. It was like a splinter digging deeper everytime she remembered - a splinter the size of the biggest tree in the Forbidden Forest and with the personality of the Whomping Willow.

While in the store, she would try on a shirt or pair of jeans and find herself wondering if Severus would like it when he saw them on her only to remember the truth. After the third time it happened, she simply quit trying things on. She knew her size and anything she ended up not liking, she could return.

How would it be with this year's Snape? Would he let her in? Let her be his friend? Would she even want too? She hadn't really focused on him the night before, but would his face - which would be different; younger, less scarred, and without the dusting of silver in his hair - cause her pain? It would be his, after all, no matter the age. The crook in his nose would be similar, and so would his eyes.

What if she, out of some misguided notion, turned her affections on him? But then, how could she? He wasn't her Severus - he was just Snape, freshly recruited and still partly in love with her mother.

That was her answer then - she couldn't. Not yet, anyway. Maybe once she had moved past this, if she ever moved past it. Then she could attempt civilized contact, maybe even friendship. She doubted she could ever love him the way she loved Severus and didn't want to. He wouldn't know her the way Severus did, wouldn't have shared all those experiences.

Hollis breathed out slowly, blinking back tears.

She knew she had things to do - practicing brewing Wolfsbane for Remus, for one, and getting her new background organized for another - but she picked up her tin of letters instead and headed for the door, leaving a small note on her door that said where she had gone too.

Once she cleared the inner wards - there were two sets; one along the perimeter of the grounds that kept out everybody unless they were keyed into those wards, along with various other things, and the inner one that extended twenty meters in all directions from the walls of the Manor that kept everyone but those of immediate blood ties to the Lord of the House from getting any closer - she activated her portkey and landed at the edge of Severus' grave.

The snow had covered the freshly dug grave, disguising it completely. Hollis was grimly amused - how just like Severus; blending in with everything when he should have stood out completely.

"Hi," she told the grave almost breathlessly, wondering what he'd think of her talking to it. Probably not very well - she was essentially talking to dirt - but while he wasn't particularly mushy or anything, he might appreciate the sentiment behind the talking.

With a wave of her wand, she transfigured a fallen branch into a small bench and set it down to the right of the grave. She sat down and stared at the tin her hands.

"Who would have thought you'd write me letters? They are all for me, aren't they?" she asked quietly. Then she chuckled darkly. "I can only imagine Frank and Alice's surprise at it - they probably thought you were colder than the snow...I can't believe you're gone. I will, eventually - I do with Ron and Hermione, though they're alive now, aren't they? - but I wish I didn't have to accept you were gone. At least I have the letters...that's something. Like a piece of you left for me to unwrap and understand. A bittersweet gift..."

She looked up, feeling the sunlight dance across her face through the branches of the tree, and sighed. It was a truly nice day - brisk and freezing, but bright and sunny. It was almost ironic, really. The only day that had ever reflected how she had felt was the day Neville died - a storm had raged for three days, as though even nature was angry and bemoaning his death. Which, in a way, seemed fitting; his passion had been nature. His love for dangerous plants was only rivialed by Hagrid's love of dangerous animals and Severus' love of extremely complicated and lethal-if-you-cut-even-a-hair-too-thin potions.

The tin seemed unnaturally heavy in her hands and she looked back down at it. Her fingers traced the 'SS' longingly and she swallowed thickly.

"I'm so tired of losing people," she mumbled, voicing the thought out loud for the first time. "Everyone close to me is gone. Even before this ridiculous time jump, they were gone. You were the last..." Her voice broke and she tried to stifle a sob.

She knew the Help Yourself Through Grief book like the back of her hand and knew it helped some, and that it said to cry whenever - it was cathartic and all that - but she couldn't bring herself to let it go. Not here, not in broad daylight. Not over the grave of a man who hated tears.

With several strong sniffs and a hint of help from her Occlumency barriers, she pulled herself together enough to open the tin. His scent, mingled with that of parchment and ink, drifted out and she inhaled deeply. What would it have been like to wake up one morning and smell that right next to her? To smell it on her clothes after falling asleep on him? To have it mingle with her own in a small house somewhere quiet and peaceful and away from everybody?

Everything in her ached to know and it literally felt like it was killing her not to know, to never get that chance to know.

Quickly, she shut the lid, suddenly unable to bear the thought of the scent escaping and fading.


Alice peeked out the front drawing room window again. It had a great view of the front grounds and she'd know immediately when Grey - Alice had decided to call her thus to keep from confusing her with the smaller Hollis - came back.

A pair of strong arms wrapped around her waist from behind and Frank drew her close. "She'll come back when she's ready," he murmured in her ear, his voice deep and pleasant.

"I know, but I can't help but worry," Alice replied softly. Neville was off to the side a little ways, building blocks on the ground. Frank had been playing with him only a few seconds ago.

They stood silently, watching the world outside of the window. It was nearing sunset and Grey had been gone for hours. Alice silently resolved that if she wasn't back by the time the sun was fully down, she was going after her. What if she had cried herself into exhaustion again? She'd freeze to death.

"Frank," she whispered, sudden terror squeezing her heart. "You don't think she'd commit suicide do you?"

Frank stiffened behind her and she twisted to face him, searching his face. He looked surprised and alarmed by the thought, but she could also see him turning it over in his mind, searching for signs that she was either right or wrong. After several heartbeats, he relaxed a little.

"No," he said decisively. "She all but swore yesterday that she was going to end the war and change the future. She's come too far and lost too much to give in now, not even over his death. Not to mention the things she bought today - that doesn't sound like someone who's planning their own death. Though...she might not be thinking as clearly as she might - if she stays out there by accident..." He trailed off, looking sober and concerned.

"I'm going after her if she's not back by sunset," Alice informed him.

He nodded. "That's probably for the best."

There was a flash of green and then Snape's head was in the fire. It was such an odd sight that, for a moment, Alice could only blink at it. What on earth did Severus Snape want with them?

"Where is Grey? I need to speak with her," he said quickly. There were faint dark circles under his eyes and though she could only see his head, he looked a bit...frayed at his edges. As though he had been under tremendous strain.

"She isn't here, but I can get her if you want to come through?" Alice managed to say. Snape considered it for a moment, then nodded. As Alice turned to grab her coat, Snape came all the way through.

For once, he wasn't wearing his customary all black layers, only a white button up shirt, black jeans, and boots. The cuffs of his white shirt had been rolled back up to his elbows, his Mark standing out starkly on his pale skin, and it was slightly wrinkled, which only reinforced Alice's belief that he had been stressed. To her recollection, except for the pranks James and the others had inflicted on him, Severus Snape had never been less than perfectly neat.

"I'll be back soon," she said, then hurried out the door. As soon as she left the inner ward, she twisted and landed at the foot of Severus' grave.

Before her eyes could even fully focus, Grey was up, her wand pointed directly at Alice's heart. Alice froze and Grey sighed, lowering her wand and sitting back on the bench she had added to the graveside. The tin Frank had spoken of sat next to her, but it wasn't open and Grey didn't look like she had been crying or anything.

"What is it?" Grey asked, sounding heavy.

"Snape just flooed over - he wants to speak with you. I think something's up with You Know Who," Alice said briefly. "I mean, I've never seen him such a state and I don't know what else it could be." She shrugged.

Grey nodded and stood, picking up the tin and shrinking it before slipping it back into her inside pocket. She gave Severus' grave one last lingering look before moving to Alice's side. Within minutes, Alice was pulling off her winter coat and Grey was tugging off her gloves, putting them in her pocket.

Snape was pacing and Frank was watching him curiously as they entered.

"Yes?" Grey asked, her tone brisk and neutral. Alice wondered if it hurt to see the younger version of Severus; she imagined it would. She moved towards Frank's side, where she could see both of their faces.

For a long moment, Snape only stared at her and then started walking towards her slowly but with determination. Grey's face looked confused and disbelieving, then utterly shocked and at a loss. Her mouth even fell open a little, as though in bemused wonder.

He stopped in front of her, so close Alice probably couldn't have put a book between them.

"Hollis," he said lowly, his voice a caress as his hands came up and gently cupped her face. Her hands gripped his wrists as his head leaned forward to rest his forehead against hers.

Alice's jaw dropped.

He knew. She didn't know how, didn't understand what was going on, but he knew her name, her real one. And he said it so affectionately. But how? She glanced up at Frank quickly - he looked just as dumbfounded as she felt - and then back again, not wanting to miss a moment of whatever was going on.

"You're back," Hollis whispered incredulously.

"As if death could stop me," Snape said so softly that Alice almost missed it, a slight smirk on his face. And then, to Alice's utter surprise, he kissed her.


Yep - Sev is back in action. How do we feel about this twist? I'd love to know, so please review.

Sorry for taking so long to crank this out - Ch. 12 was kicking my butt, but I've won, so hooray!

Thanks for reading!

-C. Lux