Chapter 7

Snape hesitated as he stood in front of the portrait that would grant him entrance to Lupins private chambers. He really was not in the mood to face the two trouble makers all to soon. And besides, when were they going to bed? He for sure did not expect honesty if he asked them. He folded his potions weekly and whispered the password. Godwin Mandrake eyed him for a second before swinging open.

The chambers were nothing new to the Potions master so he just strode forward to the living room and sat down in the armchair, slightly impressed that the boys were in their rooms. So they were able to follow simple orders. Impressive.

"Mr. Potter, Mr. Weasley, please come to the living room." He smirked as he heard the two debating over something in a hushed voice. The door to the Master Guest bedroom opened slowly and they came forward eying him nervously. He dwelled in their incomfort for only a few seconds before returning their stare, only in a strict and stern posture.

"Professor Lupin had to seek the Willow earlier than expected. I was asked to 'baby-sit' you in the meantime, as you two obviously can not be trusted. I dont want to hear it, Mr. Weasley." Ronald snapped his mouth back shut, staring at the floor defiantly.

"You two know what is expected of you, so please return back to your work and go to bed at the stated time. We do not want to get into trouble with our dear Guardian again, do we?"

He smirked at them once more before dismissing them by returning to his magazine. He saw them scampering out of the room out of the corner of his eye and frowned. They were planning something, he smelt it.

"Shit, why is he here?" Ron whispered after he closed the door. Harry huffed and sat back down at the desk. So Remus didnt trust them. But that was their fault wasnt it? They had ruined that.

"Because we shattered that little trust Lupin had in us. But thats okay, I mean, we would have to stay in our room anyhow. Lets just get some more assignments done." Ronald couldnt believe his ears. Why did Harry sound so resigned?

"Well, we can hope that Snape wont sleep here and then get up in the middle of the night and get our brooms and such." Ron whispered before returning to his History of Magic essay.

1000 After Christ. What happened. The founding of Hogwarts, he knew that. But a 3 Foot essay on that? He dipped his quill into his ink and closed his eyes.

There was this growing distrust of Muggles for Wizards and that compelled the four greated wizards of the age to found hogwarts. Yes, that was it. He could fill 3 feet with that, couldnt he? He could take Binns on a adventure. There was at last still the Chamber of secrets he could describe and all.

Harry stared at his Potions essay. The Babbling Beverage Potion. He had heard this word before. Yes, Snape had said that in his fifth year, when he had tried to tell him about Sirius being held hostage by Riddle. But Snape had paid no attention to what he had said and simply said that if he wanted to hear such nonsense he would give him that Potion or something like that. Anger build up in the pit of Harrys stomach as he remembered how desperate he had been at that time. If Snape would have only reassured him he wouldnt have gone there, or he would, no. There was no sense dwelling in old memories. What was done was done. There was no way to change all that. Pain flared up inside him and he crunched the started essay in his chest. No, he would not think of that.

"Harry, what's wrong?" Ron asked and looked at his best friend slightly worried.

Harry opened his mouth to reassure his mate that everything was alright but nothing came out. Fire burned the back of this throat as he threw the parchment fisted in his hand into the garbage bin. He jumped to his feet and stormed out of their shared bedroom before Ron was able to stop him.

"You could have reassured me. Instead you got him killed." Harry shouted at Snape. Tears welled up in his eyes. "I told you. I told you he had Sirius and you made me look stupid. You didn't even listen. You could have kept me from going there. This is entirely your fault. GOD DAMN IT. I was only 15." Harry choked slightly on the sob that he would not allow to leave his throat.

Snape stood up slowly, taken aback a little. He had not expected such an outburst, was not in the slightest prepared.

"I told you and you sneered into my face, you sided with Umbridge, the little toad. You made me kill the only person who ever loved me. I hate you! You are at fault, you could have changed that! You made me kill him. I saw you killing Dumbledore. I trusted you. You knew I would see, you told me to be quiet. I trusted you, I thought you would help him. You made me watch you do it. You could have sent me down did you do it? I HATE YOU!" Harry screamed, his own words not even making sense to himself, he just wanted to get it off his chest.

Snape swallowed hard. He knew all this, he had asked himself. But at that moment, this had all seemed right. He had no clew what else to do. When he saw Harry in Umbridges Office he had heard what Harry had said, he had understood but the boy was gone before he was able to tell him that he had informed the order. The boy had been reckless. He should have known that Snape could not react to his words while Umbridge was present, he would have gotten the mutt killed. The same with Dumbledore-

"You think I wanted to kill the Headmaster? You think I was in my right mind that night? I wasn't. I was just about to kill my greatest Idol. The only man who ever forgave me for my sins. He was like a father to me. And I had to kill him. I thought of nothing else this night. I saw you and yes I told you to be quiet because I did not want you to be killed right next to him. Thats why I told you to be quiet. Who gives you the right to judge me? Yes, you have seen things and yes you have lived through more than most, but I have seen things that would make you sick. So dont you dare think that you are better than me and dont you dare judge me." He had not screamed but he for sure had not stayed calm. The potter brat stared at him with wide eyes.

"But you told me to be quiet. You made me watch-" The boys voice broke and a sob broke loose. "You made- you had me kill him." He sobbed incoherently.

"Stop this sniffeling." Snape said, to his surprise softer than he would have wanted.

"Yes, I told you to be quiet and I did not have the sense of mind to tell you to run. I was overwhelmed by the situation myself and all I thought of was the last order the Headmaster had me follow. And yes I ignored your hideous attempts of letting me know your Godfather was supposedly in danger because I had to safe my face and your godfathers face in front of Umbridge. But I informed the order straight away. You were only gone by then. So don't you dare blame me." His voice was bitter and he sounded way to old. He was not that old yet. He was barely 38.

"Are you quiet done now? You are still grounded to your room." The Potter brat stared at him wide eyed. Tears were still running down his face. He retreated towards the door but stopped halfway.

"'m sorry." he mumbled before hurrying into his room. Snape feel back into his armchair and folded the Potions weekly.

How long had the brat been carrying those things around with him? He thought he had cleared all those uncertainties up when he had given his memories to the brat. Why was the boy still doubting his innocense? Had he not shown him that he was trustworthy? Had he not shown him that he had only been acting directly on Dumbledore's orders? He had shown him in his memories that he had loved Lilly more than anything else, and he had given him the information how to kill the Dark Lord. Was he not in the sleightest thankful? Should he explain himself? Probably. It was not good for the boy to run around blaming himself and others for that manner. Wouldn't it be best to nib that in the bud straightaway? But what should he say? Did it really matter in the end? He was leaving in a couple of weeks anyhow, wasn't he?

He could talk to the boy on the day he planned to leave. That at least would save him from temper tantrums. But he had sworn himself to change for the better, was that really for the better? Wouldn't it be better to grant the boy the chance to hear him out, digest it and ask questions? But what was he supposed to tell him? Should the Weasley sc- brat be present also? Better first-hand than second-hand. Yes, he would tell them in person. Both of them, that was the better decision.

Harry flung himself onto his bed and hid his face in his pillows. Ron stared at him with wide eyes. He had just screamed at Snape and was still alive. This was unbelievable. But he understood him. What on earth hat possessed Snape to make him watch him as he killed Dumbledore? But he understood Snape as well. He wouldn't have been able to grasp a straight thought on that night either if he would have been the one who would have had to kill the Headmaster. He wiped is face with his right hand. This was tiresome. He closed his eyes and leaned back into his chair. Should he say something? Something to comfort him? No, he wouldn't know what to say.

Harry squeezed his eyes shut. What in the earth did he just do? He knew that Snape was not at fault for killing the Headmaster. He knew it. Why did he show Snape how weak he was. The man would only make fun of him now. Anger flared up inside of his stomach as he imagined the next potions class. The man would only make fun of his, sarcastic remarks. He had changed yes, he knew that. But there was still the Snape Harry knew, somewhere there. And now Harry had given him reason to break through once again.

Minerva looked up at Dumbledore's portrait once again. "Albus, look at me." she finally said. She was annoyed. The headmaster mostly ignored her. There had been no good advice so far, not from him, not from any other prior headmaster. She waited until Albus' eyes had totally focused on hers.

"I need you now, more than ever." She said and waited for his nod. "Severus blames himself, still, I want you to talk to him. I know you are hurt, I know you regret ordering him to do so. I know that you would want to go back in time and command someone else. I know all that. But you can't. You are here, your soul resides in that portrait, you are there. You have the chance to talk to him. You saw him. Give him the chance to forgive himself." She said in a rush. He voice shook slightly.

"He wants to leave, I understand that, but I wont have him leave before you did not tell him you forgive him. He needs to hear that in person, Albus." Dumbledore placed his hands against each other and looked at her for a second before leaning forward. "Minerva. He knows I forgive him. But very well, Call him up. I will talk to him." Minerva almoust gave herself away, she was barely able to contain herself to break into a childish grin. Instead she allowed herself to smile slightly.

"Thank you, I will call him up." With that she called up a house-elf and had it inform Severus.

Severus stiffened as Toak appeared in front of him. "The Headmistress wants to see you in her office." Snape stood up and told the elf to remain and watch over the boys until he returned. With that he left the office, relieved to leave behind his guilty emotions for only a little while.

"Toak is here." Ron whispered as he glimpsed out of the door seeing the elf dust the dining table. "Snape is gone," he added as he took a quick glance at the living-room. There, that was their chance. He glanced at the still motionless Harry before taking his chance and walking into the living-room.

"Toak, Harry and myself would like a light dinner. Would it be possible for you to bring us some?" The house-elf nodded bowed deeply.

"Yes Master Weasley, Taok will be right back." With that he plopped away and Ron ran into Lupin's office. There the brooms were leaning at the far wall, he slowly stretched out his magic, searching for magic protecting them or some sorts of Alarm charms. He snatched them and ran back to his room carrying both as he found none. He swiftly shrunk them to pocket size before hiding them into their trunks.

"I got the brooms and hid them. The only thing left to do now is finding a smell-altering charm and finding out if the passsage way through the room of requirements is still open." He said and glanced at Harry who didn't even glance around.

Toak plopped into their rooms and put the tray down on the little coffetable in the corner. "There I's brought you your dinner." Toak said proudly and left the room before Ron had the chance to thank him. "Come on, Harry lets eat something before class." He said and grabbed a sandwich himself. Harry slowly sat up. His face was slightly red and he looked rather uncomfortable.

"Do you think he will kill me?" He asked between bites of his Tuna Sandwich. Ron frowned.

"Nah, he was okay with your little outburst if you ask me. He didn't look all to mad. I mean, yeah he was mad, but not like Snape mad, more a little surprised-mad." Harry shrugged and took his bag. "Come on, let's go now. We still have time to check the room of requirements that way. And thanks for getting the brooms." He said and Ron hurried after him.

Toak looked at them as they both made their way towards the portrait. "Toak is told to watch you. Where is yous Masters going?" Ron stopped dead.

"We are going to class Toak. You can go ask Professor Snape." Snape knew they had to go to class, didn't he? What was that all about?

"Toak, we have class now. We have astronomy. See, this is our schedule, have a look at it." Harry said while handing his schedule to the house-elf. the chubby little thing had a look at it and then handed it back. "Very well, I's tell Master Snape about you's Master's whereabouts when he's returns." Harry nodded thankfully before hurrying out of the Chambers. "Okay, so we have to run up to the seventh floor, only to run back down to the first to take three set of stairs up to the entrance of the Astronomy tower to finally run up 6 more sets of stairs to get to the tower." Ron whined but followed the running Harry anyhow. They were both panting and grunting as they finally stood in front of the heavy arch doors. Harry had ran back and forth three times wishing for a way to get to Hogsmead. Ron opened the door and sighed.

"Good, there is the portrait. That should be enough for now. We have to hurry back down now." With that they turned around and headed back only to stop dead as they saw the marble staircase to the Headmasters office starting to turn. Harry grabbed Ron and pulled him back behind a bookshelf. Harrys stomach churned as he saw Snapes robes appearing with the turning steps. They would get caught. But they were at least closer to their common rooms then the room of requirement. Harry held his breath, as if afraid that his shallow breathing would get him caught. But Snape went right past them, obviously deep in thought. Ron and Harry both looked after him rather startled.

"We can either wait till he walked down all those steps or we can take a shortcut. Do you know one?" Harry nodded and ran towards the Gryffindor Commonroom entrance. He quickly said the password before jumping through the hole. He screamed in pain as he slammed his shin into the bottom of the round formed whole in the wall. He doubled over and held his shin crying out loug. "Ow, oh my god. I think I shattered it." He tried to hide his tears but they came by themself. Ron quickly looked around and made sure nobody saw them.

"Calm down. Your shin?" he whispered and rolled up harrys trousers. He swallowed. The skin was carved off and the shin was badly swolen already, turning numerous shades of blue and green. "Yeah, you gotta go to the Hospital Wing." Harry cried out again and nodded. Ron grabbed his friends elbows and turned back towards the portrait.

"Now, the Shortcut ends in the third floor." Ron asked the tapestry to open, bowing in front of it and being stupidly polite. The tapestry quickly vanished and showed a whole in the wall. Ron grabbed Harry again and quickly helped him through the opening. Harry cried out in pain as he humbled one leggedly through the wall. Ron sighed and then pointed his wand at Harry. "Petrificus totalus". Harrys shocked face was safed into a stoned feature. "I am sorry Harry, but you are just to heavy to carry, and I dont want to hurt you." Ron said and carefully laid his best friend on the floor. "Mobilicorpus".

Ron carefully moved the body in front of him and stopped at the stone-slide. He then sat down and laid his best friends body on top of him. He slowly slid down holding his best friend in a death grip. As he slid onto he dirty floor he quickly enchanted harry to flow in front of him again while casting scourgefy on himself and his mate. He then walked through the stone wall. He exhaled in relief as he ended up in front of the two wooden doors.

"Madam Pomfrey. Harry hurt himself." Ron called as soon as he flew harry into the room.

"Oh dear Merlin. Lay him down on the bed dear. 5 points to Gryffindor." Ron gave her a thankful smile but in truth didn't care a bit about the house points anymore. "Relashio."

Harry cried out in pain the moment his body was released from his binding. "Oh my dear, Mr. Potter, when will I ever not see you here?" She chided as she cast a quick diagnosis charm on him, only to find out that his shin really was broken. "This won't take long. It's simply painful. You will be up and about come morning." She said while hurrying to her potions cabinet. "Here, this will help with the pain and this will help you sleep. You Mr. Weasley best hurry up to class." Madam Pomfrey said while waving her wand over Harrys shin in a complicated pattern.

Ron squeezed Harry's hand before hurrying towards the Astronomy tower. Great, Lupin would surely kill them.

Snape exited Minervas office, his stomach churning. He knew all along that he was forgiven, but hearing it again just felt so much better. He was relieved that Minerva had granted them Privacy even though he had tried to have her stay. He wouldnt have expected himself to break down. He had not cried since 16 years. He felt so much lighter now. He wouldnt have thought. He had always praised himself to stand above such human, immature needs. But he felt better now. Albus had cleaned out all his doubts, it was almoust lke before. Before he had murdered him. He was there, after all. There was a man he could still talk to, a man who understood. What was he thinking, thinking that he was alone now. He wasn't, now he knew. He wiped his face and rightened his robes before having Godwin Mandrake allow him inside Lupins chambers.

"They went to class Master. I is waiting for your return to tell you's." Toak said as soon as the Portrait swung close behind him. "Yes, Toak. Thank you." He said dismissing the elf. So he had until 11 for himself. Thank god. Time to get ready for a long needed talk between himself and the two brats who were going to bring him to an early grave.

Hey there, a new chapter for you. Sorry it took so long. And thank you for your reviews.

So Snapes wife to be; I will have them run in the next chapter or the chapter after the next, and you and I both will have to see how far they will get ^^

So wandamarie; Yes, I am better and thank you, I hope you find this one just as good as the last.

Hey Missny1; To bad I cant send you messages, thank you for the New Years wishes.

Icul8ter; First, I really like your penname, second thank you. I am glad the story is to your liking.

So for all the others, why dont you leave a review as well, I would love to know what you think. The next chapter shouldnt take to long, I have a therapy-pause. Thank god.