I'm still not fully moved but I wanted to make good use of the last days in which I still have Internet! So here is the new chapter :)


Chapter 7. The comforting touch of a hand

Everything was like that for a couple of days more until one night, Kurt woke up from a strange noise coming from somewhere in the apartment.

It sounds a lot like if someone is throwing up.

Kurt gets out of his bed and noticed that the noise comes from the bathroom which has its door ajar. He opens it a little bit more just to see Blaine hovering over the toilet bowl.

"Blaine?", he doesn't get an answer, so he walks over to him and strokes his back. "Are you okay?"

"Can you leave me alone, please?"

Kurt acts like he hasn't heard him. He takes a towel and holds it under the running faucet before giving it to the older. Blaine takes it and looks up to him with red rimmed eyes.

"Can you call Dean, please, and ask him if he could come over?"

Kurt hides his disappointment.

"Sure…"

He walks outside and takes Blaine's phone to dial his friend's boyfriend number. Just as he wanted to hang up, Dean answers. "Hey sexy…," he said with an obvious drunken voice.

"Dean? It's Kurt."

"Whaaaath. Why?"

"Blaine isn't feeling pretty well. He's asking you if you can come over, like… right now."

"I'm at a party right now. I don't think I can get out of here. It's a really important thing."

"Dean, your boyfriend is lying on the floor and feeling so bad that he wants you to come over, and you just think that this stupid party is more important?"

"Look Kurtie, just tell him I'll be there some time soon, okay?"

"Don't call me that."

"Come on Kurt, don't be like that. Tell him I say 'Get better'"

Kurt doesn't hear that last sentence because he has already hung up.

"Selfish prick."

He returns to the bathroom and sees the poor man still sitting on the floor.

"Blaine? I've talked to him and… he said that he's coming some time soon. He's doing something important…"

"At 2 AM?"

"Yeah."

He rests his head on the toilet bowl border.

"Come on. I'm bringing you to your bed."

"No, I-,", he looks to the toilet.

"I'm getting you a bowl for if you need to throw up again. You can't stay here the whole night, baby."

Neither of them noticed that little pet name. Not even Kurt who said it out loud.

Without any further comment, he takes Kurt's hand which he has offered him and gets up just to notice that he is so weak that he collapses on Kurt's chest. Kurt holds him so he doesn't fall.

"I'm dizzy."

"I see that. What is happening to you? Do you know from what you're feeling sick?"

"Probably just nerves and stress."

"It's been some tough weeks. I haven't seen you much around here…"

He puts Blaine's arm around his shoulders and takes him to his room. He made him sit on his bed and then he noticed that his shirt has vomit stains. Without saying anything, he leaves Blaine alone for a second and searches for a new shirt in Blaine's wardrobe.

"Here," he hands him the shirt with a little smile, "You should change it."

"I-," he takes it with his shaky hands and tries to get rid of his old one.

Kurt wants to give him some privacy.

"I'm leaving you for a second. Just call me when you're ready."

"Wait… I- I can't…"

Kurt turns around and sees that he has trouble changing. Without further comment, he helps him, trying to have his gaze fixed on Blaine's face and eyes so he wouldn't feel too awkward and uncomfortable, but at that stage, Blaine wouldn't even mind or notice. He is too tired.

"Get into bed. I'm bringing you a bowl."

On his way to the bathroom, he checks Blaine's phone, to see if Dean has left any message. Indeed, he has.

To Blaine:

Blainey, I will be there as soon as I can. Get better. I love you

Kurt takes it with him to show it to Blaine.

When he comes back, it seems like Blaine is asleep so he puts the bowl at his bedside and strokes Blaine's arm in comfort. As he turns around to leave, he notices a hand around his wrist.

"Stay."

He turns around to assure he heard well and if that's really what Blaine wanted. He meets his tired eyes and then he knows that this is the right thing to do. He takes the chair from the desk and places it at the bedside.

"No… here…," he pointed at the other side of the bed, "Please."

"Are you sure?"

He just gets a nod in response so Kurt walks over to the other side and gets in bed, but not under the sheets. He still wants to give Blaine the privacy he deserves. He doesn't really know what to do so he stares at the ceiling not saying anything at all. All of the sudden Blaine's hand reaches behind in search of Kurt's hand. When he founds it he takes it and places it on his tummy, not moving his hand which is holding Kurt's in place.

"Thank you for staying."

"That's what friends do, don't they?"

"Yeah." What Kurt can't see is that Blaine is smiling from ear to ear.

They both fall asleep in that position.


Nearly 8AM.

Dean enters the apartment. The first thing he does is to take his shoes off, so he wouldn't make any noise. He tiptoes to his boyfriend's bedroom. He opens the door and what he sees makes him furious.

"Get out of my boyfriend's bed. Who do you think you are?"

Both boys jump at the screaming voice. Kurt doesn't move because he doesn't even know where he is, so Dean takes him by his arm and drags him out of the bed.

"Get out of here. You're no longer needed. Don't ever do that again."

"Seriously? You don't come to see him because you're at a stupid party and now you're blaming me because I had to comfort him?"

"Get out."

"No… Dean… what party? Let him. He didn't do anything. I wanted him to stay," Blaine said sitting up at the border of the bed.

Kurt is pushed out of the door which is closed immediately. He's still not fully awake so he just stands there blinking the tiredness out of his eyes. At least it's Saturday.


After some minutes…

Kurt is sitting at the table starting to get some food into him.

"He is a frigging kid and he's actually a stranger," Dean said as Blaine opened the door to get to the table where Kurt is. Dean followed him.

"Right now you're behaving much more childish than any kid would and he isn't a stranger to me anymore. He is my friend. Do you get that? MY. FRIEND. Nothing more and nothing less. My friend." He placed his both hands on Kurt's shoulders.

"You know what? I'm leaving. Either it's me and him leaving, or it's him staying and I'm out. You decide, Blaine."

"Of course, Dean. When it gets difficult you always leave. We can't even have a normal discussion because you obviously can't handle difficult times. Sometimes I feel like I don't know you anymore."

He leaves the apartment.

"Dean… wait… I'm sorry…," Blaine ran after him.

Kurt stands up from his seat and walks to his room. He takes the suitcases he stored under his bed and starts to pack. He didn't get far.

"What are you doing, Kurt?", he noticed a firm hand on his wrist which was turning him over abruptly.

"I'm leaving. I don't want to be the reason of that breakup or whatever that is. He's obviously jealous even if there is no reason for that. He just hates me and I can't really blame him. He doesn't know what intentions I have and he most definitely doesn't know me at all."

"No, you're not leaving."

"Yes I am," he continues to take his clothes out of his wardrobe.

Blaine sits down on Kurt's bed, covers his face with his hands and starts to sob.

"No… Blaine," he sits down to him and hugs him briefly. "If he wants me to go, I really have to. You have to understand him. How would you feel if all of the sudden he had a roommate which casually turns out to have the same sexual preference as him?"

"I wouldn't mind."

"I'm not so sure about that, Blaine."

"But I don't want you to leave. If he can't handle you being here, then I'm sorry. Maybe it has to be like this. You are staying."

Kurt shakes his head.

"Don't leave me alone," he said while a tear begins to run down his right cheek. "We have just started to be friends. I don't want to quit that."

Don't leave me alone... So I'm making him feel better when I'm here? Why?

"I-, wouldn't if I could, but your boyfriend is making you choose and there is now way I'm going to allow you to choose me over him. I'm just a little college boy. He is the love of your life, if you permit me quoting you."

"Don't go. We will find a way, but please don't go."

"Then let me talk with him and let me set some things straight. I'm sure he will understand."

"I don't want that. I don't want you to get more into things than you already are. You're actually here to study and not for this."

"Drive me to his house. Let me talk with him or I'm really going."

"Where would you go?"

"Oh… don't worry. I still have the number of that man who wanted to hook up with me before you called me the first time."

Blaine looked at him in shock.

"I'm joking, but I will find something else, Blaine. Please… let me talk with him."

"He probably doesn't want to talk with you."

"I know that, but I need to know that I tried at least."

"Alright. Get ready and get your things out of your suitcase again. That's ridiculous."

"Okay. Uhm… by the way, how are you feeling? Are you okay again? If not we can just go on another day."

"I'm fine, Kurt. Thank you for staying. I maybe shouldn't have asked you to stay, but when I'm like that I just don't know what I'm thinking anymore. Did it made you feel uncomfortable?"

"Not at all. I'm your friend, remember? Friends should be able to do such things. And I know how it is to feel alone and not having anyone who understands the situation."

I'm here for you, whenever you need me.

"Right. I hope someday you trust me enough to tell me more about you."

"I already trust you enough. I only need to find the right time."

They smile and Blaine leaves the room.


After a while in Blaine's car in front of Dean's house.

I will be waiting here in case he doesn't open the door, okay?"

"Okay." He gets out of the car and walks to the front door where he rings the bell. No one responded.

"Dean? It's Kurt. I know you are in there because your car is outside and I also know you're behind that door because you went to see who's out there. Can we please talk? There is no reason to be jealous."

No answer.

"Dean? Come on. Open the door. We really should talk about it and clear some things up. I don't want to be the reason for your fall out."

The door opens. Kurt looks to Blaine with his eyebrow raised and enters the house.

"Hey… Can we sit somewhere?"

"Living room is that way," he points.

"Good."

They walk and sit down on the couch facing each other.

"Dean… there is absolutely no reason for you to feel jealous. He is just a good friend to me and I wanted to comfort him this night when he was feeling so bad. Most of the time he just treats me like his little brother who he needs to take care of. That's very sweet but I don't feel any more than friendship for him."

Do I really?

"I know… actually it has nothing to do with you that I left. I just searched for a reason so I could, without hurting him, but choosing you as a reason, was probably a bad idea. He is pretty fond of you."

"I don't understand."

"The hate. I just can't anymore. It's getting to a point where I can't bear it any longer. Sometimes I can't stand being around him, because I know he knows how I feel. I love him so much, Kurt, and I really thought I could handle it, but I can't."

Kurt hast to let that sink in first.

"But… if you love someone so much, can't you get the power from that love to continue? I mean, love is so much stronger than hate…"

"When you ever love someone so much that it hurts, Kurt, you try to take as much as possible, but when the glass is so full that it nearly overflows, it only takes one little drop and it will overflow. I don't want to hurt anybody. I've been overprotective, sometimes a douche but I will never want to hurt the people I love, whether with words or other actions. I feel like I have already started to do so and I hate myself. It was all so different before Blaine got that part in that TV show. He was known and there was hate towards me, but it just got all worse."

"You do know that he refers to you as the love of his life, right? How do you think is he going to handle you breaking up with him?"

Dean's eyes filled with tears but he refuses to let them fall. "I'm so sorry, but I think he will understand. He's smart."

"And you really think you can't try it another time? Why don't you ignore the hate or call them out? Maybe if they get to see how you really fell about it they will stop or at least think about what they can cause."

"This type of people is not very easy to convince otherwise. Blaine needs and deserves someone stronger and caring. I'm not the right person anymore for that."

Without much thinking he gives Dean a hug. "I thought you hated me."

"Oh I did… I mean… no. I just thought you were one of those people who would hate immediately on me. I guess I built a wall to protect myself and to seem stronger as everyone, but deep down that's not me. And I think Blaine knows that. That's why he always kept forgiving my fall outs."

They separated from the hug.

"He likes you very much. I'm not sure if you know that, but he talks about you a lot when we are around other people. Like how proud he is of having you and stuff," Dean said smiling. "You are good to him. Don't waste that chemistry," he pats him on his knee.

"I don't think there is any more chemistry than the friendly one."

"If you say so… You guys were cute together this morning."

"I didn't notice that in your voice."

"I'm sorry. I know that I'm wrong. That's why I'm putting an end to it. I don't deserve my place on Blaine's side."

"It's a shame that hate can cause this. Even if you weren't how it's supposed to be, I liked you for him."

"The problem in this society is that we get ourselves so screwed up with the image in our head of what it's supposed to be. There is nothing that's supposed to be. Life is not a plan you can make with some stereotypes."

"Dean… I'm so sorry. I liked you two together and I never had the intention in getting in your way. Never. I even wanted to move out of the apartment this morning, but I guess you know Blaine better than me."

"My decision has nothing to do with you neither with him. It's basically just me."

"When are you going to talk with him?"

"I need to think first. Not about the decision I made, but about the how I'm going to tell him."

"He's probably going to ask me later how it went. Do you want me to mention something?"

"No, please… tell him he needs to hear it from me."

"Okay."


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