Disclaimer: I don't own YYH or the characters
Thanks to everyone for all the reviews, including so guest reviewers. Though I can't PM you, I still appreciate the feedback and am happy that you like the story :D
A few weeks passed since the day Botan's mother had lost her job, and things still weren't getting any better. It was great to see her mother a little more often, but everything was a struggle. The gas prices increased slightly, groceries were getting more expensive, and Botan had sent in her college application after asking her mother about the fee. Her mother didn't mind giving it to her, but things were tight, and Botan felt guilty for needing the money. She even went behind her mother's back and applied for a couple of jobs. So far she hadn't heard anything back.
School was becoming a challenge. Because all of her classes were advanced placement, she had a ton of work every night. The last few nights, she hadn't even finished her homework assignments and had to work on them in her free time during the day, which she barely had. Her friends all noticed a change in her, especially when she was constantly doing classwork during lunch. She even caught Hiei eyeing her strangely when she spent the whole lunch period reading a chapter of a book for their English class. He was already done with the book.
Botan was fading fast, and her exhaustion was catching up with her. It made her even more stressed out and emotional. She couldn't control herself. But that was okay because it was Friday. She could sleep in the next day. That alone was an exciting thought.
"I'm getting worried about her," Keiko stated as she was putting on some makeup. She and Yusuke were going on a date, and he was in her room with her sitting on her bed. The two of them had been talking about Botan. They both noticed something was going on with her, and she was just pushing along like nothing was wrong.
Well, except that she was no longer walking with the group to and from school, leaving home a little bit later and not going anywhere but home after school unless she had tutoring. She was working straight through lunch all the time. She had fallen asleep in a few classes, even in chorus as Kurama had told them. They wouldn't have been surprised if she had fallen asleep in her band class. At gym, she wouldn't walk with them on the track, but instead studied flashcards the whole period. They always knew their friend was studious, but now she was going crazy with it. Eventually, she was going to burn herself out.
Yusuke sighed, mentally agreeing with his girlfriend. Botan only pulled back when she was going through something, like when he figured out she was getting bullied in middle school. She was acting differently from then, so he knew that that wasn't the problem. He wished she would just tell them already.
Botan was stubborn. Everyone in their group knew it. Get her to talk was just as difficult as getting Hiei to smile or laugh. If she wanted to handle things alone, she would until she couldn't take it anymore. No one wanted her to have to go through that.
But when Kuwabara tried to talk to her, she shot him down and avoided him the rest of the day. Kurama had tried to figure it out after she passed out in chorus, but Botan just told him she hadn't gotten much sleep the night before and not to worry about her. She didn't even give Keiko the chance to ask her. Yusuke, though, he was afraid to ask her because if she shot him down like everyone else, she wouldn't go to any of them when something terrible did happen.
She seemed to be handling herself okay, though. Yusuke would have just accepted it and moved on but, when Yukina and even Hiei picked up on Botan's behavior, a red flag was drawn. The two of them barely knew her, and they had known the girl her entire life. If everyone, including Kurama's friends, could tell she was off, then everyone had a right to be concerned.
"Me too," he admitted after a while, his voice near a whisper. "But you know how she is. It's going to take a lot to happen to get her to tell us anything."
Keiko shook her head, not accepting that answer. "That's not good enough, Yusuke," Keiko countered. "She's our best friend. We have to do something to help her."
Yusuke thought about it for a moment. Lately, Botan had been throwing herself into schoolwork. She also hadn't invited anyone over in a while, not even for their usual movie nights. "Hey!" Yusuke exclaimed. "Here's an idea. Obviously she's feeling stressed with school work. Why don't we do like a study sleepover party?" Keiko blinked at her boyfriend, her face betraying shock as Yusuke eyed her strangely. "What?"
"Did you seriously just suggest studying?"
Yusuke flashed her a heatless glare. "You told me to think of something to help her. I could study for a night if it meant getting her to relax about school. And we could make it a group thing. Even invite Hiei and Yukina. I think Hiei has a majority of her classes, and Yukina's in Kuwabara's and Kurama's chemistry class. It might help her to be in a laidback study environment."
"That's not a bad idea," Keiko agreed. "I can talk to my parents about it. We can use the den downstairs. My parents wouldn't mind it at all."
"I'll start making the calls," Yusuke offered taking out his cell phone. "I'll call Kurama first. He's the only one that can reach Hiei, I think. We'll surprise Botan later."
Keiko nodded and continued to get ready for hers and Yusuke's outing, still thinking more about her best friend. Botan was like a sister to her, and she hated when she acted so distant from the group. Hopefully it really was only studying that bothering their normally cheerful friend. This way, this party would help her deal with whatever she was struggling in.
Botan was sitting at her laptop, a word document opened and her hands hovering above the keys. She had this paper to write on a book the class read. Truthfully, she got nothing out of it, as always. It was really starting to weigh heavily on her, these interpretation papers, and they had them almost every night. Usually, she would try making something up and use what little she understood of the poems to support it. So far, she had been getting a lot of C's on these small assignments. If she kept this up, she would end up getting a really bad grade in the class and ruin her chances of getting into the university she wanted.
It was her dream school, one that focused on science, psychology, and music. It also had a well-known writing program which was why Pyro was looking into it as well. At least for her, it was an out-of-state school, so getting in was the first challenge, and the second was getting the funding for the tuition would be doubled. It was already high enough for in-state residents.
Her only consolation was that her father agreed to help her a long time ago. He had told her mother he'd pay for half of her expenses, which was good considering they were struggling financially at the moment. She was waiting a while before she asked him for money to pay for half of the application fee. He hadn't taken her call the other day, and she didn't want to ask over an e-mail. She needed to tell him face to face, or as close to face to face as possible. If she didn't, he would take whatever she said the wrong way and send a hurtful e-mail like the ones he had sent her and her mother through the years.
Hey.
The chat window made a ping noise indicating she had been messaged, and she smiled when she saw Pyro's name. Hi, what's going on?
Nothing really, Pyro replied. I'm getting dragged to a study party later by a friend of mine and my sister. Not looking forward to it.
Botan chuckled. The studying or the party.
Both.
Aw, why not, Pyro? she asked.
Hiei sighed before he started typing. First off, the jackass is going to be pissed we're going anywhere. Well…at least me. He's so freaking creepy. The other day he picked out that I came home in different clothes than what I was wearing because I got my other shirt dirty. I also can't stand half of my friend's friends, although that girl is going to be there. Strangely enough, we've actually been getting along.
Botan had frowned and become panicked when she read the first part of her friend's message, but it quickly turned into a grin when she saw the last part. Hey, see? I told you things would work out with her. She was probably just trying to make you feel welcome.
It's not just that, Hiei replied. I heard some bitch talking about her after class, and I think this girl uses that guise as some sort of cover. Like she wants to remain off the radar, so she makes it seem like she has no problems.
I can relate, Botan added hesitantly. I try not to concern my friends with my issues. I just don't want anyone to worry about me and, if they knew what I was going through, they would.
Hiei shook his head and countered her statement. They would want to help you. What's going on?
Botan released a puff of air and started to tell her online friend. Well, in addition to mom losing one of her jobs, I'm doing horribly in my English class and I don't know what it will do to my chances for college. I'm also struggling in my math class which is really unlike me. I mean, I usually tutor math, but this year it's been hard. At the same time, my father ignored my call yesterday and I need to ask him for help with college expenses because we can barely afford food and bills right now, and though he agreed to help mom when I was younger he's just changed so much that I'm afraid to ask for help. Then I kind of went behind my mother's back and applied for a few jobs to try to help out, but I haven't heard anything yet.
You should talk to someone about all of this, Hiei suggested. Maybe your school guidance counselor can help you figure out what to do about school and what to apply for. Then I would talk to the teachers of the classes you mentioned and see if you can do any extra credit or if they could help you with the assignments. As for your father, don't worry about him. The worst he could say is "no." Then that would just prove what an asshole he is. With the job stuff, don't worry about it. You're already being stretched so thin with your work and after school stuff, it might not be something you can handle.
I know you're right, Botan answered back, but as for talking to my English teacher, the guy hates me. I don't even know what I did to get on his bad side. Usually my teachers love me…
Then my offer to help still stands, Hiei responded. Truthfully, he didn't want his friend to struggle. She had so much on her plate right now that it just wasn't fair.
Botan was about to send a message back when she heard a knock on her door downstairs. She turned back to her screen and said, Hold on. Someone's knocking on the door. I'll be right back. By the way, don't think I've forgotten what you said about that guy. You really need to tell someone. I'm afraid for you.
Hiei read the message and the last statement stunned him. Never had anyone in his life been afraid for him. Of him, sure, but for him…only his sister seemed to and that was because they were twins and very close. To read a message from a girl he never actually met, it just spoke volumes to him. It also made him come to terms with the fact that he was living in a house with a dangerous man who was obsessed with his every movement. Instead of being freaked out by that, he grew confused and angry. Why was this guy so obsessed with him, and how did his mother not notice? He was going to have to get answers somehow. He only hoped that nothing else would happen along the way.
"Yusuke, Keiko," Botan greeted in surprise. "What are you doing here?"
"Pack your books, Botan," Yusuke said with excitement, "because tonight you are coming over to Keiko's for a study party."
Botan gaped at her two friends blinking the shock from the irises. "Guys, I can't…I-"
"Oh no you don't," Keiko laughed. "You can't say you can't come because you're studying. Look, everyone is going to be there. We'll get some pizza and work on all of our classwork. Even Hiei and Yukina are coming. He's in a bunch of your classes, so the two of you will be able to help each other."
Botan thought about it for a moment before looking towards the stairs. Maybe it would be good for her to get out of the house and study with her friends. It would definitely be a different environment. Her mom would probably tell her to go, too. After all, it was Friday night, and her mother was going to be at the lab late. Turning back to her friends with a smile on her face, she said, "Sure, just let me go pack. I should call my mom first to let her know I won't be home later."
"Okay, sounds good," Yusuke replied, smiling softly as he watched Botan run up the stairs. He felt pretty pleased with himself that he thought of this idea. He was really hoping it would help her.
Hiei was not looking forward to spending the night at Keiko's house. He honestly didn't like the idea of staying at any of Kurama's friends' homes. What made things worse was that when Yukina had brought it to their mother's attention and she agreed to let them go, Tarukane did not seem happy with them or her. Hiei didn't want to leave his mother alone with that guy. He offered to stay home with her and saw the twinkle in Tarukane's eye, probably from the thought that he could control his actions. His mother shot the idea down and told him she wanted him to be with his sister, especially since she didn't know the people whose home they were staying.
The twins quickly packed and left with Kurama when he arrived, but Hiei didn't miss the heated glare Tarukane shot at his mother before he left. What was going on between those two? He could have sworn his mother wanted the relationship with how much she defended him, though now that he thought about it she never shot down Hiei's opinion. She only told him not to say those things. Did his mother know something too? Now Hiei really wanted to go back, fearful for his mother's life.
"Hiei, what are you thinking about?" Kurama asked him.
Hiei glanced over to his friend and said, "Nothing."
They made it to Keiko's house just in time for the pizzas to arrive. Keiko welcomed them all and directed them towards the den where Botan and Kuwabara were already setting up some beanbag chairs and sleeping bags. Botan looked up and smiled when she saw Hiei giving him a slight wave of her hand as she continued her work. Hiei did not wave back, nor did he smile, but he did nod to her in acknowledgement. His eyes met Kuwabara's, and the two of them glared at each other. Kuwabara hadn't forgotten what Hiei had said about his friend, and Hiei still couldn't stand Kuwabara's attitude or actions.
"It's really nice down here," Yukina spoke up, cutting through the tension. Hiei regarded his sister, his expression softening. Kuwabara instantly smiled when he saw her, and that did not go unnoticed by Hiei.
"Yeah," Botan agreed. "Keiko's parents decided to turn the basement into a family room. It used to be really creepy down here when we were kids."
"Haha!" Yusuke laughed loudly as he descended the stairs. "Yeah, you were always freaked out. I still can't believe you bought that a murder took place here!" Keiko scowled and smacked Yusuke upside the head, his hand instantly reaching there. "Ow! What the hell, Keiko?"
"You're such a jerk," Keiko muttered in response.
"How was I supposed to know that a six year old would lie about murder or even know what murder was?" Botan shouted in her defense.
Yusuke grinned at her. "Yeah, I'll give you that. Normally kids that young don't watch their parents' shows."
Kuwabara looked at his friend like he was crazy. "Your mom actually let you watch her cop shows when you were that young?"
"Oh please," Yusuke scoffed, waving the boy off, "'allowed' would have meant she wasn't passed out drunk leaving me to watch whatever was left on the TV set." Yusuke looked over to Kurama and his friends and sweat-dropped having not realized they were there. He chuckled nervously. "Oh, Kurama…didn't realize you guys had gotten here already." He smiled over at Yukina who looked really concerned, and Hiei who surprisingly looked stunned. "Not to worry, guys. She's sober now. She was going through a lot of stuff when I was young. She's actually a cop now."
It's none of our business, Hiei thought to himself. It had shocked him to hear someone talk about life's events so casually around strangers, and that alone was the reason he had been shocked. He would never talk about his life with people he hardly knew.
He thought the conversation was over when everyone grew silent, but then Yukina voiced her concern at Yusuke's statements. "She's really okay now?" Hiei had to keep himself from groaning. Though he loved his sister, sometimes her immense concern for everyone around her drove him crazy. He feared her naivety would cause problems for her one day.
Yusuke's expression softened and he smiled genuinely. "Yeah, Yukina," he replied. "Mom was struggling a lot when I was a kid. Her parents weren't really the most accepting of her and me."
That struck a chord with Hiei, seeing as he could say the same for his mother's family. Hiei knew Yukina was about to voice that the same had happened with them and stepped in before she could. "A lot of that goes around," he remarked leaving out their mother's plight.
"True," Kuwabara replied looking over to Botan. "I remember you telling us something similar when we were in middle school."
Botan froze and paled. "W-What?" Botan replied nervously, forcing herself to think back. She sighed in frustration when she remembered the passing conversation. "Right…well, they're better about that stuff now. We still don't talk to them much."
Keiko was actually happy Botan was speaking about herself among friends. Maybe her family was what was troubling her. She decided to take advantage of Botan's confession. "Did something happen with them?"
The blue-haired girl instantly looked alarmed. "What? No! Not at all, actually. Things with them has been fine."
"You're getting awfully defensive about something, though," Kuwabara observed. "You haven't been acting like yourself for a while now. What's up?"
Botan grew nervous, forcing herself not to breakdown and cry among her friends. She could already feel the pressure in her face as she strained not to let a single tear form. No one needed to know about her problems. That was what they were…her problems.
Only Hiei seemed to notice her struggle, mainly from having behaved the same way in his younger years. Though he still wasn't Botan's biggest fan, he still pitied her and decided to grant her this one favor. "I thought we were here to study," he callously scoffed, "not trade life stories."
"Hiei," Kurama called out, though not at all surprised by his friend. He knew Hiei could care less about people's backstories, especially if they reminded him of his own. He believed his friend's action to be a selfish one, not wanting to hear about Botan's life since he didn't like her. He had no idea that Hiei had just aided Botan.
"No, he's right," Botan said forcing a smile as she began to take out her books and laptop. "We are here to study."
Keiko sighed, not happy that Botan was still choosing to hide whatever was going on, but it couldn't be helped. "Let's get to work then," she said softly while mentally cursing Hiei from interfering.
Botan had been mentally thanking Hiei for the last hour after everyone finally backed off. It wasn't that she wanted to keep her friends in the dark, but telling them would only make things worse. Then they would all be worried about her, and they had their own lives and endeavors to focus on. Botan didn't want to interfere with their futures or cause drama for them. It was bad enough her father blamed her for his own shortcomings.
I'm not responsible for his shortcomings, Botan repeated in her mind. It was a mantra she had been trying to force herself to believe. Back when she was in therapy, she was able to pick out the truth and she did know she wasn't responsible for her father's actions or words. Still, feeling that way was different from knowing, and she fought with herself all the time, at least in her mind. She would have to constantly remind herself that she was the one being wronged.
She was staring at her computer screen at the same blank word document. That document was supposed to be a paper, but she just couldn't bring herself to write anything. It was supposed to be an interpretation of the latest novel they read. Botan had struggled to get through the book. It was wordy, long, and Botan kept getting lost in the pages. It took her a few days to get through one of the chapters. Then they were given an assignment, one that was incredibly challenging.
Each student had been assigned a different aspect of the book, and they needed to write an essay regarding the author's methodology in illustrating it. Even better, it was incredibly vague, and Botan didn't even know where to begin. She decided, since everyone was absorbed with the assignments they shared with each other, to quickly log onto the chat site to see if Pyro was on. It was possible he'd have some idea of how she could go about the paper. Unfortunately, though, he wasn't on.
But he was there, unbeknownst to both teenagers. Hiei was concentrating on his math assignment when he saw Botan burning holes into her laptop. He looked over to the others and noticed that Keiko was helping Yusuke with their geography assignment, and Yukina was occasionally glancing between him and Botan as she reviewed for her first AP chemistry exam with Kurama and Kuwabara. It reminded him that he and Botan shared all the same academic courses, and there was something she was struggling on. After all the work she put into explaining their biology project to him, he figured it might not hurt for them to do their work together.
Botan jumped when she felt someone moving to sit next to her and, in her silent panic, she closed the chat window and revealed the blank document. She tilted her head to see who had taken a seat by her and saw Hiei staring at her computer. "What on that blank screen has stolen your focus?" he asked without his usual snap.
"I'm having trouble with the assignment from Mr. Akashi's class," she admitted to him with a frown. Looking away from her classmate, she continued, "It took me so long to get through the book, and now I only have two days to guess at how the author illustrated how the man's greed led to his success. Honestly, though, I thought it led to his downfall."
Hiei nodded. The book was backwards, had a double meaning, and the teacher always seemed to go for these in-depth analyses even when it was hardly a point of the book. He himself had been annoyed with the assignment, especially when he had to write about how the man's pregnant girlfriend had been a detriment to him. The black-haired teen remembered thinking, This one went through a bad breakup, humorously about their teacher.
"Your topic is something that can be worked with," he said opening Botan's book to a specific marker and folding the corner of the page over. He did the same with two other passages. "All you need is three examples, and then to write why those examples led to his success using quotes, and you should be fine."
Botan blinked at her classmate who glanced over at her when she remained silent. "What?"
The girl regain her composure, though a faint blush dusted her cheeks. Though curious about her reaction, Hiei didn't say anything. He just stared at her questioningly until she decided to answer. "Um, thank you," she replied awkwardly. "So, um…what was your topic?"
Hiei let out a snort of a laugh. "Why the character's pregnant girlfriend was a burden to him. Pathetic. Our teacher obviously had some blowout with a woman and is placing that on his students."
Hiei didn't notice Botan's face fall. A few fights ago with her father, he had said something similar to her being a burden. He had told them they were better off without each other, mostly because Botan had gone against her father's wishes and spent time with their family. It was in that moment that Botan closed her laptop and stood up. Hiei had been startled by her abrupt movement, but he could see the tears threatening to form in her eyes, and he wondered what had set her off. She set the laptop down and left the room, her hand rushing to her eyes. No one else seemed to notice until she was running up the stairs. Hiei watched in stunned silence as Keiko decided to go after her friend.
What just happened? he asked himself. What had upset his classmate? It hadn't been his intention to upset her, nor did he think it was possible. What Ruka had said was starting to make sense now, as was this party. He had noticed a change in Botan, so all of her friends must have as well. Something was getting to her, and she wasn't telling anyone what it was. Whatever her struggles were, Hiei was beginning to feel bad for her.
But of course, there was only so much he could do.
