I do not own Despicable Me.
Boris Yeltsin idea.
Mud-Surfing: Edith Style
Edith hastily chucked her soaking wet bathing suit in her dresser drawer and slammed it shut. She yanked on her regular outfit and stuffed her wet blonde locks underneath her wool hat. Margo was currently at the foot of the stairs, delaying their father. Agnes was sitting on her bed eating a chocolate bar and watching with wide innocent eyes. The only way to keep Agnes quiet about the affair was to give her sugar.
"Where ees yoor seester?" Gru demanded, and it seemed he had made it up into the hallway.
Edith took a deep breath before throwing open her bedroom door and arching an eyebrow. "If you're referring to me I'm right here."
Gru narrowed his eyes at her. Margo quickly stepped out of the way and pressed against the wall as Gru stormed over and towered over the middle sibling. Edith craned her neck back so she could see his face. "You are extremely tall."
"Did yoo do what I t'ink yoo did?"
"Maybe, but I can't give you an answer without specifically knowing which incident you are talking about."
"The piranhas! Where yoo playeeng with de piranhas?" Gru snapped in impatience.
Edith snorted. "I just got my wrist out of its cast. Even I wouldn't do something like that in the first week back."
Margo had to turn her head away in order to hide her soft snort and eye roll. Honestly, her sister belonged on Broadway and the theatre.
"Why ees dere water all over de floor?"
Edith shrugged. "Maybe Kyle got antsy and decided to have a snack. Maybe the pressure in the tank built up and the cover flew off along with half the water."
"Actually the glass would shatter if such a thing were to-" Margo caught her sister's glare and hastily shut up.
Gru cast a glance in her direction before focussing his attention back to Edith. He crossed his arms and frowned. "Yoo are up to somet'ing young lady. I will find out, but eef yoo step one toe out of line and I hear about eet, yoo will face-"
"De consequences!" Edith finished, mimicking her father and throwing her arm in the air for dramatic emphasis.
Gru scowled and Edith grinned easily. He stormed down the stairs and Margo quickly followed. Nefario had finished refilling the tank and was now making sure everything was secure. "Well?"
"She denied haveeng anyt'ing to do with what occurred," Gru muttered. "I don't know what I am going to do with dat gurl..."
"Send her to a boarding school would solve our problems nicely," Nefario muttered. When Gru shot him a glare he held up his hands in defense. "Kidding!"
"Do you want me to take Edith out for the day?" Margo questioned.
Gru paused and mulled the thought over. It would give them some peace and Margo would ensure that Edith did not do anything dangerous. "I suppose. No swings!"
Margo laughed. "No swings," she agreed.
"And take Agnes as well."
"Sure thing Dad." Margo went upstairs to collect her sisters. "Edith! We're going for a bike ride!" She hammered on her sister's door and it flew open.
Edith looked thoughtful. "Can we go by the river?"
Margo narrowed her brown eyes. "As long as you don't go in the water."
Edith grinned and disappeared back inside. After a moment she reappeared with a rather bulgy backpack and holding Agnes' hand. The three girls promised they would be back by dinner and Edith hopped on her bike. Margo fastened a helmet on Agnes' head and settled the girl on her tricycle. Edith sped ahead while Margo rolled alongside their little sister on her scooter.
The blonde zoomed through the puddles that had collected on the road and grinned when the spray rose behind her. There had been a tremendous rainstorm last night and that could only mean one thing. The hill by the river would be slick with mud.
Fun times are ahead.
...
Margo parked her scooter by her sisters' bikes and joined Agnes, who was sitting on the grass clutching her unicorn toy and kicking at the mud. Edith was rummaging around in her backpack. The oldest sister sat down and closed her eyes, enjoying the peace.
Whirr! Whirr! Whirr!
Oh for the love of academics...
Margo gritted her teeth and slowly opened her eyes. Edith had unravelled something and was pumping air into it using a battery-powered air pump. It whirred away while Edith waited patiently. The brunette got to her feet and marched over, lugging Agnes along. "What do you think you're doing?"
The blonde pushed her hat back and wiped the sweat off of her brow. "Pumping up an air mattress."
"...why?"
"Well, I was thinking of surfing down the hill on it. Not sure if it'll work though."
"How did that thing fit in your backpack?" Margo asked in disbelief.
"It wasn't easy. I had to stuff the pump at the very bottom." The mattress had been pumped to max and Edith turned the pump off and shoved it back in her backpack. "Can you give me a hand?"
"No! I told you-"
"Not to go near the water. I don't plan on going near the water," Edith pointed out.
Margo scowled and shook her head. After a moment's thought she gave a sigh of resignation and helped Edith lug the mattress up the slippery hill with Agnes trailing behind.
"My shoes don't have grip!" Margo complained as she managed to right herself for the third time. "I really don't feel like falling flat on my face."
"Almost there," Edith replied. "And then we take the fun way down."
"Edith, your version of fun normally gets us in trouble or maimed."
They made it to the top of the hill and glanced around. The sun made the river sparkle and a coat of mud covered almost everything. Agnes blinked and asked, "Are we going to take a nap?"
"Nah! We're going for a ride," Edith said cheerfully as she climbed carefully onto the mattress. Agnes gleefully scrambled up and Margo carefully thought about it. It was one of Edith's tame stunts. And besides, it was just like tobogganing during winter.
Margo climbed on and hugged Agnes close. Edith grinned broadly. "Daredevil Extraordinaire Edith is back with her manager and protégé."
"Not if I can help it," Margo muttered under her breath.
"Here we go!" Edith cheered and they pushed off. The blonde hopped to her feet and tried to stay balanced as they flew down the muddy slope, picking up speed as they went. Agnes shrieked happily and waved her toy in the air. Margo shook her brown bangs out of her face and peered around Edith. Her brown eyes widened in horror.
"Edith!"
"What?"
"We're heading for the river!"
Edith frowned and glanced ahead. Sure enough, they had picked up so much momentum they were sailing straight for the water. "Well...this is problematic."
Ignoring the surprise at the fact her sister knew the word problematic, Margo scowled and hollered, "Abandon ship!"
"Never!" Edith hollered. "The captain will go down with her ship!"
Margo hugged Agnes closer and screamed as they flew over the bank and splashed into the river. Coughing and wiping the flecks of water off of her glasses, she squinted and glanced around. Edith had toppled over when they landed and was laughing hysterically. Agnes was giggling madly and kicking her feet in the water.
She sighed wearily and started to paddle. "Come on guys. Land ho!"
Some days it didn't pay to get out of bed...
