Chapter 7: Shameless Plugging Time!

Will heaved, he was nearly at the trap door now – he could hear a right old bitch fight going on down there. And he thought all Mary Sues were meant to be so nice that they'd never hurt a fly and they'd be loved forever by everyone always. Though maybe these were Angsty Sues? They weren't like that at all.

BANG! Out of nowhere, something whacked him on the head hard, and then rolled across the floor. Will rubbed his head, and looked down at what had hit him, and paled. It was a round piece of rubber with a metal chain coming out of it.

"Damn those shameless plugs." He muttered, rubbing his head, and continuing to heave the cannon, though being careful not to get too near to the plug. He knew the damage they could do to perfectly good fanfiction. (hay spekin of plz r&r my outher story its cald a long way frmo home its wel gud) He shook his head and carried on pulling his cannon.

It was taking forever. Where the hell was Jack?!

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Jack helped the girl back on board, though he was regretting it slightly now. She hadn't let go of his arm since.

"Oh, thank you Jack." She simpered. "I knew you'd save me."

"...Yes." Jack said. "Look, I need to go and help my good friend Will, do you mind just running along to wherever you were going in the first place now?"

"Oh, but... I have news!" She suddenly declared. She ploughed on, as Jack began to edge away. "My name is Wilhelmina – well, there are twenty two middle names, so I'll tell you them later – Turner, and I am Will's great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great..."

Jack ran.

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Will grunted as he heaved the cannon again, and then he heard footsteps. He froze, anticipating a Sue, but he saw Jack, and smiled. Jack did his usual staggering, almost dance-like walk towards him, and suddenly swore loudly. Will wondered if he'd been stung by a Some Sort Of Minor Disability Bee, and picked up Tourettes...

"What the hell is this?" Jack asked, and Will looked down, and groaned. The chain of the shameless plug was now wrapped around his leg, and getting tighter.

"You just walked into a shameless plug." Will said. "They're pretty deadly."

"Great." Jack muttered. He hopped up to the cannon and started pushing. Soon, the cannon was at the top of the stairs leading down towards the Sues. They were all too busy trying to jam various elegant keys into the lock to notice them.

"DIE, MARY SUE SCUM!" Jack shouted, and they shoved the cannon with all of their might. It began rolling, when Will suddenly got an odd sensation. There are lots of these in the fanfiction world. And this one meant only one thing... Backspace! He thought. We'd better hurry up and

"DIE, MARY SUE SCUM!" Jack shouted, and they shoved the cannon with all of their might. It began rolling, when Will suddenly got an odd sensation. There are lots of these in the fanfiction world. And this one meant only one thing... Backspace! He thought. We'd better hurry up and

"DIE, MARY SUE SCUM!" Jack shouted, and they shoved the cannon with all of their might. It began rolling, when Will suddenly got an odd sensation. There are lots of these in the fanfiction world. And this one meant only one thing... Backspace! He thought. We'd better hurry up and

"DIE, MARY SUE SCUM!" Jack shouted, and they shoved the cannon with all of their might. It began rolling, when Will suddenly got an odd sensation. There are lots of these in the fanfiction world. And this one meant only one thing... Backspace! He thought. We'd better hurry up and

"What just happened?" Jack asked, after a pause.

"The Suethor hit backspace." Will said. "But she's given up now. But just be careful... this Suethor is a sly one."

The cannon rocketed down the stairs, and smashed into the Mary Sues, scattering them. Jack saw the ones that were crushed suddenly pop like bubbles, and vanish. This was most of them, seeing as the cannon had hit right in the centre of the group. Two or three remaining Sues began swarming up the stairs.

"Run, son!!" Bootstrap hollered.

They didn't need telling twice.


NB: I have worked out the intricate workings of the reply button! So from now on, I shall actually reply to my reviews instead of saying my thanks from here. I don't know why I didn't spot them until now... er, oh well! I can't believe I've gotten more reviews for this fiction then for my other fiction in much less chapters. But still, one of these days I'll write one of thos fanfics that get about ninety reviews by chapter three... you know the ones?

Anyway. As it is Shameless Plugging Time, for this chapter only, you can feel free to plug your stories via reviews. Go ahead. Knock yourselves out. Ta ta for now.