Hello, everyone! Chapter Six is up. Thanks to everyone for reading. I hope I tie up any loose ends in this chapter, but if you think there are any left, feel free to pm me and ask about them.

Thanks for reading!


CHAPTER SIX

Silence.

Deep silence, deathly silence, a silence so impenetrable and unbroken that it almost seemed like the world itself had taken a sword through the heart, and was lying unmoving and still, its last dying breaths fading away into the darkness. Either that, or the entire planet was frozen with horror and shock, stunned into stillness and silence by the horrifying knowledge that Henja was gone.

But it couldn't be true. It simply could not be true. This was a mistake or an illusion, it had to be. Henja could not be gone. She was too loyal, too brave, too devoted a friend to me to be gone.

She would not leave. She would not leave me without saying goodbye. I knew her. I knew Henja Snow-Walker, I knew her better than I knew anyone else on Nirn. And I knew that she would never abandon me in a thousand years.

But her home stood empty. And the silence slept on.

My eyes wide as day, I turned in a slow circle, taking in the terrible sight. I did not want to believe it. I could not believe it. I would not believe it. Henja had to be here somewhere, just out of sight. Perhaps she was hiding, or outside somewhere. No, she wouldn't be gone. There was no way that she could be gone.

I had to find her. I had to. She was my best and only friend, the only person who truly understood me. How could I survive if she was gone? She was my light in the darkness, my hope in the despair. I needed her in order to say strong, to stop me from sinking into a black ocean of misery and pain, in the same way that I needed food to prevent me from starving, or water to prevent me from dying of thirst. Since I had met her, my life had changed. I had been able to persevere through my father's beatings and vicious hatred. She had kept me going. If she was gone, if she was really and truly gone, gone beyond my reach and sight, then I was lost. Lost to drown in a sea of hopelessness, lost to struggle through a life of sorrow and anger, lost without any light to guide my way.

'Henja!' Her name ripped from my mouth, and I heard all my despair and fear and horror burning in the single word. My cry echoed throughout the house, rebounding off the walls as if even they were trying to call her back to me, as if the Divines had seen my terror and had persuaded the entire world to try and bring back my friend.

But there was no answer, and as the last traces of the sound of my voice faded away, the silence fell again. That cruel, evil silence, the silence that seemed to be taunting me. She's gone, the silence jeered. She's gone forever, and there's no bringing her back. You've lost her for all eternity.

No. I couldn't have lost her. The Divines were surely not that cruel. The Gods must know enough pity to understand that I was nothing without her. Nothing but a skeever trying to evade being crushed. They wouldn't take her away. Not when they knew how much her friendship meant to me. They wouldn't, they couldn't, they mustn't.

But they have, the silence hissed, a malevolent, sneering voice within my mind. They have taken her. They don't care about you, boy. Why should they care? You are nothing. Nothing!

'Henja!' I screamed again, my hands clenching into fists.

'Gallus,' came Marcella's voice from behind me, quiet and wary.

I spun around. 'She's gone!' I shouted, and suddenly I was angry with her, without knowing why. 'She's gone. I have to find her. You have to help me, I can't lose her, she's my best friend-'

'I know.' Marcella placed a gentle hand on my shoulder. 'Come on. Let's look for her.'

We both knew that there was no point in looking, that there was nothing to find. But still, we made our way through the house, calling out Henja's name, looking behind tables and cupboards and chests, checking every nook and cranny for her, or for some explanation of where she might have gone.

As I threw open the doors to each room, as my voice grew hoarse from shouting her name, as I searched under ever table and behind every wardrobe, I could not stop a million new fears from engulfing me. The way the furniture had been overturned implied that there had been a struggle, and yet there were no signs of blood. What if Henja and her family had been kidnapped or captured? If so, would I be able to find them and bring them home? If that's what I have to do, I'll do it, I thought, gritting my teeth.

But what if they were dead? What if they had been dragged off somewhere and killed? I shuddered as I began to imagine dark figures watching from every corner, silver blades flashing in their hands, waiting for the right moment to strike while my back was turned…

A flash of steel caught my eye. I spun around, a scream building up in my throat- one which quickly died when I saw what had caught my eye.

I let out a gasp of relief, yet at the same moment my breath caught in my throat.

There was a dagger embedded in the wall opposite me, sunlight sparkling on the shining metal. Pierced by its blade was a scrap of paper. A scrap of paper covered in an untidy scrawl. Beneath it lay a quill and a smashed bottle of ink, still leaking its contents onto the wooden floor.

I swallowed and slowly forced myself to walk over to it, my legs suddenly feeling as if they were made of lead. I reached out and gave the parchment a sharp tug, pulling it free of the dagger, Dreading what I would see, I held it up and looked down at it. The writing was messy and jagged, laced with blots of ink and spelling errors. I knew instantly who had written it, and I tightened my grip on the letter and began to read.

Gallus,

I don't have much time to rite this, and I don't know if you'll ever be able to read it. But I hope you find it, becos you need to know what happened.

''Because' is spelt b-e-c-a-u-s-e, Henja,' I whispered, tears pricking my eyes. 'And 'write' has a w in it.'

I don't want you to think that I ran away and left you. I wouldn't ever do that, becos you're my best friend. We don't have any choice about leaving. The gards showed up and told us we had to go. They said we've not been paying taxes or something like that. Father said we had but they wouldn't lissen. I suppose we spent too much on food and stuff after winter. We've got ten minutes to get all our stuff and leave forever, and we won't ever be able to come back. I don't know where we're going to go or what we're going to do.

I just wonted to say that I'm really sorry I wasn't able to stay or to come and say goodbye. Gallus, you've been such a good friend to me, and I'll never forget you for as long as I live. You did so much to help me even though it put you in danger, and you made a really good Hakon One-Eye. Thanks for saving me from the troll, and for helping us not die in the winter, and for being my friend. And I'm sorry for my bad spelling, Father never really taught me how to rite properly and I expect you'll be really cross with me for not using all the proper letters. I know you too well!

I'm really sorry that I have to leave, but I'm happy that I met you. I hope you become a great explorer-scholar-adventurer, like you wonted. I'll never forget you, and I hope we see each other again someday.

Henja

I stood motionless for what could only have been a few seconds, and yet seemed to me to be as long as a thousand years. From what sounded like a million miles away, I heard Marcella calling my name, yet I barely registered the sound. There was a strange roaring sound in my ears, and my hands were gripping the paper so tightly that they had ripped it. My heart was thumping against my chest, hammering like a smith forging a new sword, and the rest of the world seemed far away, so far away.

My trembling hands released the paper, and it drifted and fluttered to the floor. It landed in the pool of ink and was consumed by the black liquid, the oozing substance swallowing the last words my friend had given to me.

'No,' I whispered. 'Please, Divines, no.'

But the silence was still hanging in the air, taunting me, mocking me, laughing at me. And I knew that the answer was yes.

She was gone, truly gone. Henja, my friend Henja, my playmate, my comfort, my champion, my refuge, was gone.

She had left.

She had left me.

She had left me alone.

She had left me alone forever.

She was gone. Gone, gone, gone, gone, gone.

And I would never find her again. Never.

No! screamed a furious voice inside my mind.

Yes, the silence sneered back.

'No!' I roared, and the sound of my own shout jerked me back to reality. The silence was shattered as if it were a sheet of glass that had been struck with a battleaxe, and I almost felt that it had fled in terror, stunned by my fury.

'Gallus.' Marcella was beside me, and there was fear in her eyes.

I turned to her, suddenly aware that my face was streaked with tears. 'She's gone.'

I tried to shout the words, but they came out as a broken, twisted sob.

'Gone where?' My sister's voice was quiet and gentle, but even her kindness could not calm me.

'The guards sent them away.' My voice was so choked with tears that I could barely make out my own words.

Marcella stooped and pulled the letter from the pool of ink, sending black droplets flying. She squinted at the words, trying to decipher them. Finally she dropped the paper and turned to me, her eyes filled with sorrow.

'I'm sorry, Gallus,' she told me, and I could see that it was true.

But what use was her being sorry? Could that bring Henja back? Could that mend the wound in my heart and soul? Could that return the only friend I had back to me?

No. Nothing could bring her back. She was gone. Lost. Forever.

Never again would we chase each other through the woodlands, brandishing our sword-sticks as we chased down our invisible foes. Never again would we skim stones over the water, cheering as they bounced, arguing over whose stone had leaped into the air more times. Never again would we clamber through the trees, or pelt each other with snowballs, or adventure to far-off lands, or battle terrible creatures. Never again would I look into those bright, sky-blue eyes or hear that merry laugh and wide smile. Never again.

Never.

It was over. All over. The laughter, the happiness, the smiles, the adventure, the challenges, the friendship. It was over.

Our glade was just a glade again, no longer a portal to a thousand other worlds. I was just a child again, not an adventurer or explorer. The magic was lost. I would never see my friend again.

Why? How? Why would anyone want to do this to us? How could anyone be so cruel?

I looked up at Marcella, and I felt so young, so weak, so foolish.

'I don't understand,' I whispered. 'I just don't understand.'

Marcella wrapped her arms around me, and I laid my head on her chest and wept.

It was true. I did not understand. I did not understand how this could have happened, or why.

All I understood was that everything was over, that I had lost my one and only friend on all of Nirn.

And I would never see her again.


How can an eagle fly without its wings? How can a bard sing without his voice? How can a warrior fight without a blade?

And how can a child live without a friend?

A friend is not merely a person. A friend is the person who supplies you with comfort and joy. A friend laughs with you and walks alongside you, lets you cry on their shoulder and holds your hand. A friend guides you when you are lost, holds up a torch when you cannot see, smiles at you when you find yourself overwhelmed with grief. A friend reaches out to catch you when you fall.

A life without friendship is a life without laughter or happiness.

I had lived for years without a friend. I had not understood how much I had been missing. And then, when I met Henja, I began to learn how little my life was without someone to share it.

And now that I had lost her, I could not cope.

I had lived through a few months of pure and beautiful bliss. Henja had helped me to discover things about myself that I had never known before. She had transformed me, brought me out of my shell and into the world. I had been that wingless eagle, that voiceless bard, that unarmed warrior. She had given me wings, a song, a weapon. She had taught me to fly and sing and fight.

And now my wings had been clipped, and I was falling from the sky. My voice had been lost, and my song had ended. My blade had broken, and I was surrounded on all sides by my foes. And they were closing in, hungry for my blood.

Henja was gone, and with her everything I had been living for.

I was nothing without her. Nothing.

Nothing but a friendless, hopeless child, hated by his father, ignored by his brother, unable to be helped by his sister, an entire world away from his mother.

I was lost, truly lost. I felt as if I had been cast away on a ship and was lost in the middle of a freezing ocean, surrounded by crashing, relentless waves on every side. No escape. No way out. No chance of rescue. And any moment now, I would hit a rock and sink. There would be no one to throw me a rope, to pull me out before I went under. My head would slip beneath those icy waves, my lungs would fill with water, and I would sink down into the black depths of an ocean of cruelty and despair.

'Come on, Gallus, eat something.' Marcella glanced up at me across the table, her plaintive expression begging me to drag myself out of my despondency. My only response was to silence her with a barren, hollow look and poke my venison aimlessly around my plate.

'What's up with you today?' My father fixed me with an intense, disdainful glare, one that made me feel as if he were looking right inside me, seeing all my secrets. I looked down and did not answer. As if you care, I thought bitterly.

'Don't pay any attention to him.' Prosperus cast me a careless glance. 'He's not worth your wasting your breath.'

I clenched my fists and tried to shut them out. All of them. Even Marcella. None of them understood my grief. None of them understood what I had lost. I did not want to have to listen to them.

'I asked you a question.' My father's voice was suddenly tense with anger. Yet still I did not look up, did not meet that callous grey gaze.

'I know,' I said quietly. Next to me, Marcella shook her head, and I could tell that she was trying to silently warn me not to provoke him. I ignored the gesture.

'Are you going to answer that question?' I could see him itching to rise from his seat, but still I did not so much as turn my head in his direction.

'No,' I said, my voice low, and I could hear all of my grief and anger in the single word.

Marcella breathed in sharply, and some deep-buried part of me felt a twinge of guilt. I knew that watching father hurt me hurt her as well. But suddenly, I did not care about what happened to me.

'And why's that?'

I still did not look at him. I stared down at my untouched food, gritting my teeth and trying to shut out the entire world. If only I could just build up walls around myself, tall, strong, high, unbreakable walls, walls that no one could knock down or climb over. They would protect me from all the pain and anger and hatred and unfairness and injustice in the world. All of it would be blocked out forever, and I would be safe. Alone, but safe.

'I said, why's that?'

Don't look at him, I told myself. Don't look. Don't flinch. Don't react. I was beyond caring now. I just wanted him to leave me alone. I wasn't going to argue any more. I wasn't going to explain anything to him. I was just going to stay silent, and let the entire world move on without me. That would be easiest, I decided, easiest and best. Let him rage and roar and beat me, but don't react. And don't give in.

'I'm asking you a question-'

'And I'm not answering.'

The words slipped out before I could stop them, before I could bite them back. A cold wave of dread swept over me. I had allowed myself to show over the top of the protective barricade I had retreated behind. And now I had exposed myself to the enemy's fire.

Many of the warriors of Skyrim have a saying. 'Keep your shield raised until it shatters. Then draw your sword and fight until it snaps. Fight on with your fists until they fail. Stand against the foe to the last drop of your blood.'

It's a typical thing, really, for a Nord to say. Such recklessness and refusal to surrender is classic of the sons of Skyrim, a race that values honour, courage and perseverance. When the battle turns against their favour, a member of almost every other race shall turn tail and flee, to hide, to wait, to watch, to recover strength and wait until the time is right to strike again. But a Nord warrior has only one thought when it comes to the battle. Not so much 'death or glory' as 'glory in death.' If they cannot win a battle, then any Nord who calls himself worthy of entry to Sovngarde would far rather die fighting in valour than live in shame, with the knowledge that they fled from a foe.

As you know well, I am no Nord warrior. I am an Imperial thief. Few Imperials will choose a glorious death to a chance to continue their life. And no thief will put their life at risk if there is a chance to escape.

But at that moment, I set aside all wisdom and reason.

My shield was broken.

It was time to draw my sword.

I had allowed myself to lower my defences. And now I had no choice but to fight.

And fight I would. Until I fell.

I would take it no longer. This man had crushed my childhood. He had destroyed my youth and given me a warrior's heart and soul and spirit too young. His cruelty, and my will to survive, had made me grow up too quickly, and this was the result. I was no longer willing to be thrown around and despised and beaten and oppressed. I knew who I was, and I was a fighter down to the bone. I would not let him make me suffer any longer.

He got to his feet. 'And why are you not answering?'

I don't know what he was expecting me to do. But I am almost certain he was not expecting me to rise from my seat as well, and tell him the absolute truth.

'Because I don't want to answer, and I don't care what you do about it.'

'Gallus, no!' Marcella grabbed my arm and tried to pull me back down. I shook her off and met those cold grey eyes, unflinching and unafraid.

'You don't care?' His fists were so tightly curled that his knuckles had turned white. 'And why-'

'You hate me. Mother's dead. My best friend's gone.' I spat out the words. 'Why the Oblivion should I care?'

'Insolent little- wait.' My father's brow creased, and his eyes narrowed. 'What do you mean, your best friend's gone?'

I glared at him. 'I mean she's gone. Her family got sent away.'

A flicker of recognition and surprise crossed his face. It was only there for a moment, and was quickly hidden behind his mask of hatred again, but my eyes were sharp enough to see it. 'Well, that's tough luck. Now sit down and eat your lunch.'

I took a step towards him. 'You know something about it. About what happened to Henja.'

'Henja? Never heard the name in my life.'

'Jornn Snow-Walker's daughter,' I said slowly. 'The daughter of your rival.'

He said nothing.

'You do know! I saw your face when I said she got sent away!' My voice was rising. 'You know why they got made to leave!'

'I don't know anything. All I know is that we've gained a nice bit of land. I don't have to answer to you.'

I looked at him, and I was disgusted by what I saw.

'It was you,' I said finally. 'You had Henja's family sent away.'

No reply, but the grey eyes blazed like two pools of stone-coloured flame.

'It was,' I snarled. 'You got the Jarl to send the guards to them and make them leave. You wanted their land. You wanted to get rid of them so that you could have everything that belonged to them.'

His lip curled. 'And if I did, what does it matter?'

'It matters because Henja's my friend!' I screamed. Marcella's hands were clasped over her mouth, and even Prosperus looked worried. 'It matters because she's my friend and you got her sent away!'

'Do you think I care about your gods-damned friend?' He, too, was shouting now, but if he thought that would make me surrender, he was wrong. My sword had been drawn, and now it was meeting his. Until it broke, I intended to use it.

'I know you don't care! I know you don't care about her or me or anything that's not to do with you!'

'You need to learn your place, boy. I've had just about enough of you and your cheek.'

I stared at him, coolly, coldly, evenly. My voice did not sound like my own as I replied.

'Fine.' I sounded as if I was at least twice as old as I actually was. 'Because I've had enough of you.'

And I turned and ran.

I turned my back on them, on my father's seething, apoplectic rage, on Prosperus's stunned confusion, on Marcella's terrified horror, and bolted.

I was gone before any of them knew what had happened. Out of the door, across the meadows, into the woods. Running as far and as fast as I could. Not looking back.

Because I had finally taken more than I could bear.

He had chosen to take out his anger on me. He had despised me and beaten me and made me feel like a cornered rat. He had stopped me from having any real childhood. He had hardened my heart. He had even stolen away my friend.

And I was not going to take it any more.

No. I was leaving it all behind. All of it.

Forever.

From somewhere in the trees behind me, I heard Marcella screaming my name. 'Gallus! Come back! Please, Gallus, please come back!'

For a moment, I hesitated. But I shook my head and kept running. I had come too far to turn back now. To return would be to face my father's rage. And I had decided that I would never put up with it again. Never. I would not return. Not even for Marcella. Not even for my sister.

I listened to her cries growing quieter and quieter, and further and further away, until finally they faded away into the whisper of the trees.

Only then did I stop.

I knew that they would not find me. None of them knew their way through the woodlands, as I did. They could search all their lives, but they would not find me if I did not want to be found.

I did not know where I was going, nor how I was going to survive. All I knew was that I was never going back.

I was going to go where they could not find me. I was going to find Henja.

And until I found her, I was alone.

Alone, but free. Finally free.


END OF BOOK ONE