~Six~
Dean stared ahead. There was nothing he could say, nothing that could change what had happened a few days earlier. He looked around him momentarily. He saw Sam, his eyes lined with water from where tears had been. He saw Gabriel, who was well and recovered from his incident with the car and he was holding onto Sam's hand practically bleeding moral support into the younger Winchester. Dean stood alone. He didn't want someone to take his hand, not when the only hand worth holding to him right now was six feet under. He bit his lip; the tears flowed like no tomorrow. Sam looked over at him once before leaving with Gabriel, leaving Dean alone with his thoughts.
Dean bent down, his knee caked in dirt from the ceremony. It had been a small one; he knew that his friend wouldn't have wanted much. He had been a simple person when he was alive. Dean touched the letters engraved into the headstone and he choked as fresh hot tears fell down his cheeks and to the ground.
"C-Childhood living is easy to do…" he sang. "T-The t-things that you wanted I bought t-them for you…"
Dean's voice was shaky but he still continued on.
"G-Graceless mister…y-you know w-who I am…"
His knees hit the ground; his sobs rang in his ears. He barely choked out the last words.
"I-I c-can't let you…"
There had been nothing the hospital could've done. The infection had raged on long enough to make him grow weak and thin. They'd had no choice but to pull the plug on him. Dean just had to face the reality in front of him once again.
"J-Just s-slide t-through m-my….h-h-hands…"
Castiel was dead and this time God wasn't bringing him back.
-8-8-8-8-8-
Dean awoke panicked and sweaty. He looked over next to him and was relieved to see Castiel asleep and looking serene and peaceful for once. His mouth was open slightly and his eyes were clearly moving under his eyelids. He was dreaming. Dean was glad Castiel was dreaming something so peaceful, it figured the first time Dean had slept in a few days that he'd have a nightmare like the one he'd just woken up from.
"He's ok, don't worry." Dean spun around in the bed to face Nurse Jackie who walked over quietly. "The drugs we gave him to combat the fever are at work and I'm pleased to say are working so he's tired. He'll probably be asleep for awhile, but I'm also pleased to know he wasn't alone last night."
"He wanted to hear my voice…" Dean felt the need to explain himself for some reason, like he was a hormonal teenager who'd just been caught with his hand down his pants. "It…it calms him down."
Dean looked back over at Castiel with a smile. Nurse Jackie touched her hand to Dean's shoulder and he turned his head to face her.
"You were right about that profound bond you talked about when you dropped him off here," Nurse Jackie smiled over at Castiel then looked back to Dean. "I can see it. Especially in the way you look at him. Don't think I haven't noticed that."
"Am I really that obvious?" Dean smirked and chuckled a bit.
"Call it women's intuition." She winked. "He's just lucky to have you Dean Winchester."
"Well, he's my rock," Dean nodded and smiled big. "And I'm his; I need him just as much as he needs me."
Nurse Jackie didn't reply to that, she didn't have to. She simply nodded and left the room leaving Dean alone with Castiel yet again. Dean stretched and looked outside. It was a beautiful sunny day as it had been for the past few days before. Dean sat up and leaned against the headboard of the bed. He smiled down at Castiel who was curled up by his side and listened to his calm breathing, seemingly free of wheezing for the time being. Dean raked his fingers through Castiel's black hair again and smiled.
"Hope you heard everything I said to the nurse Mr. Comatose cuz I'm not repeating it." Dean looked down at his friend again. He determined he liked waking up like this. "At least not right now…"
-8-8-8-8-8-
"I brought take out." Sam entered Castiel's room and quietly shut the door behind him. Kevin had stayed behind yet again but he vowed to come by later and see how Castiel was doing. Sam smiled when he looked over at Dean laying next to Castiel and slowly stroking his hair. Dean then jumped up and walked over to his brother, he sat down in front of him and acted as if the whole event had never happened when Sam handed him his take out box of rice and a spoon. "I hate hospital food and I think that's something we can both agree on."
"Right back at yah." Dean cleared his throat and blew on the rice to cool it some before taking a rather large bite.
"Dean…" Sam said.
Dean held up his pointer finger and chewed earning an eye roll from Sam and when he swallowed Sam spoke again.
"I don't care." Sam stated plainly.
"Scuse me?" Dean asked he was only slightly confused.
"Whatever you're feeling, whatever you've always felt about Cas," Sam explained. "It doesn't bother me and it never will. When you look at him, I see this flash of something in your eyes Dean, love, security, friendship I don't know what it is and that's for you to decide, but either way I see it and no matter how much you deny it it's real."
"He's my friend Sam." Dean replied, his gaze stern but not angry. "Our friend."
"Then don't lead him on." Sam replied, quieting his voice. "Don't let him think it's anything more if it isn't. Because somebody's gonna get hurt whether it's you or whether it's him."
Castiel stirred and opened his eyes. Sam left his seat in front of Dean and walked over to Castiel with a smile and a "how are you doing Cas?" leaving Dean alone to think. In a way Sam was right. He had been leading Castiel on all these years. Dean knew he wasn't good at speaking his mind, hell everyone he knew even knew he wasn't. He still couldn't break down the wall he'd set up years ago to keep from getting hurt, but as he looked over at Castiel lying in bed smiling and laughing with his brother Dean thought about it all a little differently, maybe Castiel was the one worth getting hurt over.
"Good to see you're awake Castiel." Nurse Jackie popped her head in with a smile. "Because you all have a visitor."
Dean, Sam, and Castiel all turned their heads towards the door and Megan walked in with a bright smile and her oxygen tank by her side. Dean waved her over with a smile and Sam and Castiel waved hello for the first and second time.
"Hey boys." Megan smiled and sat down in front of Dean. "How are tricks?"
"Megan!" Dean laughed. "What do we look like cheap hookers to you?"
"Oh calm down mom," Megan joked. "It's just a saying, glad to see you're up and breathing right Castiel."
"Yes." Castiel nodded with a smile. "It is a good thing."
"Anyways so I came here to ask you all something." Megan explained. "So my family is coming today to see me and my boyfriend Zach and we're all gonna sit outside in the garden and eat lunch and catch up, I was wondering if you three wanted to come with us? You know so you could meet em?"
"Sure." Sam nodded and Castiel did as well.
"We'd love to." Dean smiled and nodded.
"Well good news Castiel here is cleared to leave his room." Nurse Jackie said. "We have to keep him for one more night to make sure the drugs work for 24 hours but after that he is allowed to return home."
"Really?" Dean asked enthusiastically.
"Really." Nurse Jackie. "I'll get him a wheelchair and a temporary portable oxygen tank for today though."
"I can do without the wheelchair thank you." Castiel spoke up. "I do believe my…well my rock can help me walk."
Dean's mouth hung slightly ajar. So Castiel had heard them this morning?
"Very well." Nurse Jackie nodded and disappeared. "I'll be right back."
"I'm so excited." Megan said with a big smile. "Today's gonna be an awesome day!"
"Yeah." Dean looked over at Castiel and smiled, Castiel smiled back. The color had returned to his face and he looked alive again. "Yeah it's gonna be an awesome day alright."
Read and Review
So I probably really fucked with all of you with the beginning of this chapter didn't I? That was the intention *evil laugh*. Anyways aside from me being evil.
Sam's brotherly advice is always good and it was well needed.
And Megan wants them to meet her family? How will their day be? Will it be fun?
All that and more will be revealed in the next chapter folks! Stay tuned!
