Chapter Seven
The Art of Coming to Terms
"Your lipstick leaves a whisper on my cheek
One breath away from I can't even speak
Your voice alive inside my chain of bones…
Oh don't think that I can't feel you when you're gone."
John Paul White + Rodney Crowell
Sakura and Kakashi reached the land of Wind Country by nightfall and were greeted at the desert gates by none other than two of the famous Sand-siblings, Temari and Kankuro. The fierce blond kunoichi pulled Sakura in for a hug before she was yanked out of the girl's embrace and picked up and spun in the air by Kankuro. "Gaara told me you were coming but I almost didn't believe him," the puppet master told her as he sat her down on her tired feet.
"Aw, come on Kankuro, it hasn't been that long since I've visited." She smiled at the dark-haired shinobi as he put his arm around her shoulder, escorting her through the gates of Suna. Absent was the purple war paint that usually lined his face, though Sakura figured he didn't have much cause to wear it now. He looked so different without it on–older, but in a dignified way.
"It's almost been two years Sakura-chan, that's two years too long." He began rambling about this and that, catching her up on things she'd missed and made a point (yet again) to remind her she'd been away for far too long.
Sakura's bond with Kankuro developed shortly after Gaara had been taken by a member of the Akatsuki and Team Seven had been part of the squad sent out to rescue him. When they arrived in Suna, Sakura learned that Kankuro had been poisoned and he'd only been given three days to live. Sakura was able to develop an antidote to the poison which ultimately saved his life. Since then, Kankuro had been a little sweet on her, but for the most part it was harmless flirting she was sure didn't mean anything. He was just grateful to the pink-haired medic for saving him.
Kankuro continued to talk about his latest inventions with his puppets, and Sakura glanced over her shoulder to make sure Kakashi was still following; wishing for a fleeting moment that he would rescue her from Kankuro's relentless string of banter. She could tell Kakashi was grinning based on the slight crease at the corner of his eye as he walked in silence beside Temari with his hands leisurely stuffed in his pockets.
"How was your trip?" Temari asked as they ambled down the sidewalks towards the Kazekage's palace located in the heart of the city.
"Easy for the most part," Kakashi replied. "We didn't run into any trouble until we reached Tanigakure. We believe Sumire sent two of her scouts out to search for her missing teammates, and they made the fatal mistake of following us out of the village."
"Did you stop them before they could report your location?"
"That we did," Sakura said, "but at the expense of that one taking a shuriken to his abdomen." Sakura tilted her head in Kakashi's direction.
"Good thing you're traveling with a medic, Kakashi-san, I'd hate the thought of your torso being ruined." Temari smirked, lips curling up at one corner as she glanced up at Kakashi.
A little coal in Sakura's gut ignited in flame. Temari was known for her boldness, but that usually didn't entail flirtatiousness. Maybe Temari didn't mean anything by her comment, but Sakura didn't like it. She'd heard Kakashi had had a bit of a reputation among the ladies, but she didn't know how much of that was just wishful thinking, and/or stories conjured up by hormonal females that were carrying a serious torch for the Copy-nin. Unless he was really keeping that part of his life secret from her, Sakura knew he hadn't been with anyone for quite some time.
Kankuro finally released Sakura from his grip when they approached the palace, and Sakura stared up at the painted red symbol for 'Wind' on the side of the oval building before Kankuro opened the door. They were ushered straight to the Kazekage's office, and found Gaara seated at the large round table; scrolls and other various mounds of paperwork littered the surface. Sakura thought his workspace was quite similar to the chaos that usually surrounded Tsunade-sama's.
The auburn-haired former jinchuriki looked up from the desk, a small, polite smile pulling at the corner of his mouth as he stood. "Welcome back to Suna, Sakura-san and Kakashi-san." Gaara shook both of their hands and went so far as to give Sakura a quick hug. "I trust your travels went well?"
"As well as they could," Kakashi said, and explained what happened during their visit in Tanigakure. Gaara listened with a calm veneer, nodding occasionally.
"I sent a few of my own scouts out when we received word from the Hokage about what happened to Naruto and Sai," Gaara told them. "But to our misfortune, they weren't able to find anything. We were hoping you'd be able to summon your Ninken pack and maybe they can pick up on something useful."
"You and I are of the same mind, Kazekage-sama," Kakashi bowed respectfully. "Konoha feels responsible for Shigaraki Tanuki's betrayal. He fled Fire Country after Danzo's death; we should have gone after him then but we were in the midst of cleaning up the aftermath of what Root had done in our own city."
"Not to mention that we were on the brink of the Fourth Shinobi War," Sakura added. "I think we were all a little preoccupied."
"All that is history now," Gaara said. "We don't have the power to change what happened in the past, only the resources and knowledge to stop it from happening again." Gaara paused, thoughtfully rolling his fingertips at his sides. "It's been a long day for everyone. Perhaps we should save the deeper discussions for when everyone has had a full night's rest. Kakashi-san, I'd like for you to sit with my advisors in the morning and explain everything you know about Root operations. We need all the inside information we can get if we have any chance of stopping Sumire and her army."
"Of course," Kakashi agreed. "We are at your disposal."
"No one knows the landscape and terrain of Suna better than the Sand-nin; I think it wise to track Sumire and her army after the sun has set. If they really are hiding in the desert, they wouldn't be moving during the heat of the day. We'll have a better chance of tracking them at nightfall."
Kakashi nodded in agreement. "The Ninken would also appreciate that."
"Very well. Have you eaten? I know it's late for dinner, but I'll have Temari show you to your rooms and have one of my assistants bring up room service."
Sakura and Kakashi had stopped at a small diner for lunch and had eaten a light meal. It was too hot during the day to eat much of anything, and they'd skipped dinner entirely. Her stomach was still a little uneasy from the day of unrelenting heat, but she knew she should probably eat something. Also, it was impolite to decline a meal offer from the Kazekage. "Thank you Gaara-sama, that would be very kind of you."
"Please, Sakura, just Gaara will do. We are all old friends here, are we not?" Gaara smiled. "We've all been through a lot together."
Sakura returned his smile. "Gaara," she corrected herself, "thank you–for everything."
"I'll see you both bright and early. Sleep well." Gaara bowed and dismissed them, and Kankuro stayed behind while Temari led them to their rooms.
At this hour, the halls of the Kazekage's palace were empty, and their light footsteps sounded against the marble flooring, echoing down the corridor. "You'll have to excuse the lack of room availability; Gaara has been renovating some of the palace halls," Temari told them. "You'll still have separate rooms but they are adjoining."
"That's not a problem," Sakura said as they wound down the arc of the hall.
The rooms were a good walk from the heart of the action, and Sakura knew they wouldn't be disturbed on this end of the building; still, she felt relieved when Temari handed her the room key. "Be sure to let us know if you need anything," she said. "Your dinner will be up in half an hour." With that she bowed and walked away.
Sakura smiled and raised her eyebrows at Kakashi as she slipped the key through her door lock. "Want to meet up for dinner?" she asked him before slipping into her room.
"Your room or mine?"
"I'll come to you. I want to wash this layer of grime off me first anyway." Sakura picked up an end of her bubblegum-pink hair and examined it thoughtfully.
"Sounds good," Kakashi agreed.
Sakura watched him cross the threshold of his room before she closed and locked the door behind her. Unlike their room at the Jade Dragon, the guest rooms of the Kazekage palace were filled with expensive modern luxuries. The walls were painted in a tranquil shade of gray and the floors were a sleek, black marble adorned by ornate woven rugs. The bed was positioned low to the ground, surrounded by a simple black frame and pillowed headboard. The plush white comforter looked to be made from soft down-feathers. And for the love of all the Kages–the air conditioning was working!
Sakura dropped her bag at the foot of the bed, and began undoing the buckles of her boots while she appraised her room. The artwork was simple, framed pictures of plant-life native to Wind Country dotted her walls, and a few of those plants sat in planters lining her windowsill. Sakura peeled off the layers of her clothes on her way to the bathroom, dropping them across the floor as she went. She grabbed her shower bag and enjoyed the comforts of the hot water as she lathered up, letting the heat knead her sore muscles.
By the time she finished, a note had been delivered under her door, letting her know that room service was waiting outside. Sakura wrapped her hair up in a towel and opened the door to bring in her silver tray of goods. She didn't bother peeking at her meal, she just shifted it to one arm and knocked on the adjoining door that led to Kakashi's room.
"You decent?" she called.
"I'm naked in the shower, what do you think?" came his teasing reply. He was mocking her exact words from the night before. Sakura rolled her eyes at the turn of a reflexive smile and twisted the door handle.
Kakashi's room was decorated almost the exact same as hers; only his comforter was blood-red instead of white. Red was her favorite color; she tried not to think of how sexy he would look splayed over the surface and–well, that was enough of that... Sakura cleared her throat, plopping down on the side of the bed as she propped herself against his pillows.
"Did you already eat?" she asked him as she removed the lid from her tray.
She noted that Kakashi had changed into a pair of sweats and a clean sleeveless shirt as he plopped down on the open space beside her. "Guilty as charged I'm afraid," he said. "I wasn't sure how long you were going to be." He kicked back against the pillows, crossing his ankles as he summoned his Icha Icha book out of some mysterious black hole only he seemed to have access to.
"The whole point of having dinner with someone is to actually eat together," Sakura said as she spooned a helping of rice into her mouth.
"I thought the whole point was to share conversation; in which case, eating is really not the point of having dinner at all," Kakashi countered without looking up from his book.
"And I suppose you can efficiently multitask between holding a conversation and reading your lewd little novel all at once?" Sakura bit into something fried she hoped was chicken. All in all, the taste wasn't that bad. "However do you do it?"
Kakashi peered at her over the edge of his book, his visible dark eye shadowed by the thick veil of black lashes. He lowered his tone and the effect sent a chill down Sakura's spine. "It's an acquired skill; one that comes with years of experience and dedication to the task. Not everyone is capable of such accomplishments; it's something I'm really quite proud of."
Sakura scoffed. Sometimes she wondered why she found the man so damned charming. She finished off her fruit, popping the cubed bits of melon into her mouth as she came up with another theory. "I'll bet," she said, "you just wanted the freedom to eat without having to watch your back–er, face," Sakura corrected. "It must get exhausting, always sneaking food when you think no one is looking." She grinned at him, depositing her nearly empty tray on the nightstand.
"You caught me," he replied stoically.
Sakura rolled to her side, hugging a pillow to her chest while she studied Kakashi's profile in silence. He didn't have to say anything, just being in his presence made Sakura feel good. It was like he put out some sort of calming aura that spoke volumes to her, and she wanted to latch on to that comfort for as long as he would allow it.
"Have you heard from Tsunade-sama?" Kakashi asked her a moment later as he flipped the page.
"Not yet. Did you?"
He shook his head. "How do you think our boys are doing?"
Sakura lifted her slender pink brows as she replied, "Probably getting into trouble."
Kakashi chuckled a little at that, and Sakura really liked the deep, resonating sound of it. She inhaled deeply, breathing in some of the woody aroma that always seemed to be clinging to Kakashi's skin, and released her breath on a slow exhale. All day she'd been thinking about their shared sleeping arrangements from the night before as those pesky butterflies fluttered around her stomach like they owned the place.
She knew what their residency meant for her and what she wanted to do about it, but she had no idea where Kakashi's thoughts were on the subject–and she knew better than to assume he'd just tell her. If it were Naruto, she could just come right out and say whatever she was feeling. But Kakashi and her golden-haired friend operated on extremely different wavelengths. It was better to tread lightly with Kakashi, lest she scare him away.
Her eyelids were growing heavy, and she was pretty sure she'd dozed off for a moment because when she opened her eyes, Kakashi was staring at her.
"What? Did you say something?"
The corner of his eye creased, and Sakura could only assume that he was smiling. "Come here," he spoke softly, left arm reaching for her.
Sakura lifted herself from the pillow, towel falling away to unveil the tousled strands of her damp pink hair. Kakashi removed the pillow she'd been hugging to her chest and deposited it to the floor as Sakura slowly, tentatively, fit her lithe body to his side as his arm wrapped around her waist. All Sakura could feel was his warmth as she draped her arm across his ribs, resting her head on his chest as she tilted her face to look up at him.
"Is this okay?" he asked, close enough to where she felt his breath on her face.
It was more than okay, but Sakura could only bring herself to nod. Her heart was beating like a rolling bassline in her chest, and warmth fluttered through her core. Kakashi leaned toward her, gingerly brushing her temple with his masked lips, and it was all Sakura could do to just lay there and not tear the confounded thing off his face so she could kiss him back. And gods that was exactly what she wanted to do.
But Kakashi lifted his arm, fingers trailing through the damp ends of her hair as he smoothed his hand down over her back–repeating the soothing rhythm as he turned his attention back to the book in his right hand. How he could read something of that caliber, and lay here, innocently holding her and stroking her hair, was beyond Sakura's rational form of reasoning.
"What chapter are you on?" Sakura mumbled in a drowsy voice.
"Seven," Kakashi replied.
"Go back a chapter and read it to me?"
"Beg pardon?" Kakashi's fingertips paused in the middle of Sakura's back as he shifted to look at her.
"I left off at the beginning of six the other night. Can you just read it to me?"
"I don't think that's such a good idea…"
"Please, Kakashi, you have such a nice voice." Sakura's hand brushed against his forearm, curious fingertips tracing along the tendons.
"You think so?" He reached across her with his left arm, flipping through the pages until he found the start of chapter six. "I guess a few pages wouldn't hurt."
~/~
Sakura had fallen asleep before Kakashi even made it past the seventh page in the chapter. He closed the book, tossing it on the nightstand before turning back to the pink-haired woman curled up in his arms. Kakashi brushed a lock of hair back from her forehead, his thumb skating across the curve of her cheekbone. She was so beautiful, he thought as he traced the curve of her lower lip. He wondered vaguely how long it had been since a woman had shared his bed.
Kakashi didn't do relationships; not because he couldn't commit to them but because rare was the opportunity in his life for one to grow and blossom. Sakura had been right the other day when she mentioned that the dating pool of a shinobi was a shallow one. They led a hard life–hard to make a relationship work when they were always gone on missions, and each one of those missions meant a possibility that they might never return. It was hard to ask someone to stand by your side and support you when walking out the door meant it could be the last time they ever saw you.
In truth, Kakashi had been content to lead a solitary life. His reputation had been forged at such a young age. He stepped into the role that had been cast upon him and played the part of the shinobi to the best of his abilities, climbing the ladder and making jonin rank by the time he was only twelve-years-old. He damn-near lost everyone he'd ever cared about by then, and the impact of those losses led him to believe that he was simply fated to be alone.
But then, somehow, the little holy terrors of Team Seven infiltrated his life and slowly began mending everything that was broken, and proving to Kakashi that he didn't have to be alone. The kunoichi in his arms right now was supporting evidence to the testament.
With her lying there, Kakashi could admit that he'd been falling for her for quite some time; though at first he tried to ignore the attraction based solely on the grounds that she was his former student and younger at that. But if he were being honest with himself, neither of those things really bothered him. Any hesitation he may have felt was simply due to the fact that he just wanted to do right by her.
Yes, there had been other women, and yes, there had been flings, but Kakashi was done with that part of his life and had been for a long time. He refused to treat Sakura with anything less than the respect she deserved; and what was more was that he wanted to provide that for her. It had been a long time since he truly, or deeply cared for anyone, and part of him had to wonder if he had really ever felt anything real–because the way he felt about her… well, that was beyond tangible.
Sakura shifted in his arms, pulling her leg across his and turned her face into his chest. Her knee was in dangerous territory; just an inch further and let's just say he might be in pain. She was too much of a temptation for her own good, and Kakashi mentally berated himself for letting her stay in his bed when he was trying to be a good man.
The decent thing would be to carry her back to her room, tuck her into bed and leave her be till morning–so after some much disciplinary consideration on his part, that's exactly what he decided to do. He shifted, easily scooping her up into his arms until her head fell into the groove of his neck and her long legs dangled over his arm.
He'd made it through the threshold of their adjoining rooms when he heard her mumble and felt her warm breath against his throat. "Kakashi?"
"Hm?"
"Are you carrying me to my room?"
"Yes, Sakura." He cradled her against his chest with one arm while expertly bending to peel the comforter back from her mattress.
"Why?" He felt her frown against his skin, and for whatever reason, this provoked him to smile.
"Because," he said, laying her down against the cool silk of the bedsheets, "you fell asleep while I was reading to you. I just assumed I was boring you to death."
"Hardly," she replied as Kakashi worked the comforter up around her waist. "Must be tired from all the walking we've done the last three days."
And the fighting for our lives and all the healing chakra you've expended, he added mentally. To her he said, "Perhaps." Kakashi perched himself on the edge of her bed, stroking her cheek with the back of his knuckles lightly.
"I don't want you to leave." Sakura's green eyes flashed up to his while he ran his fingers through her hair.
Kakashi drew a deep breath, fighting against what he wanted and what he knew he should do. There was a line somewhere; he tried to remind himself, though the edges of its boundaries were getting a little more blurred while Sakura continued to look at him that way. "Sakura, we should probably talk about this."
"In the morning," she insisted. "It's late."
"Yes," he agreed, "it is–which is why you won't even notice my absence." He started to rise, but Sakura reached out, wrapping her fingers around his wrist as she rose up on her elbow. He watched the curtain of pink swinging across her shoulder as the light from his adjoining room bled across the threshold and illuminated her in a soft glow.
"Kakashi," she breathed his name, "I can always feel when you're gone."
The pure, honest intensity of her admission broke whatever miniscule thread his resolve had been hanging by, and tightened the burning knot within his chest. Gods he was hopeless when it came to her. Sakura had him wrapped around her finger and she didn't even know. He was utterly bewitched by her transcendence.
"Scoot over," he told her, and he watched as a small smile pulled at the corner of her lips as she did just that. Kakashi pulled her to his chest, fitting his palm to the side of her face while he pressed a kiss to the center of her forehead.
Sakura reached up to tangle her fingers in the hair at his nape, and Kakashi closed his eyes, enjoying the feel of her touching him. It was hard to believe that he was a war-hardened veteran with years of experience and enough knowledge to disarm an enemy covert operation, because when Sakura touched him, he felt all of his defenses shattering down around him.
"Try and get some sleep," he encouraged her.
"I will now," she told him, entangling her fingers with his.
*Hearts*
This chapter was a little shorter than the others, but I needed it to be centralized around the growth of their relationship. Not even the growth so much as they are both realizing in their own way how they feel about one another, and don't quite know how to put it in words. Have you ever been there? The beginnings of love are always my favorite.
1. I think Sakura asking Kakashi to read to her shows a certain level of comfort within their relationship considering the material in which those books encompass, haha. His hesitation is endearing in its own right. Not because he's embarrassed, but maybe 'concerned' that reading out loud might heat things up a little more... Darn Sakura for falling asleep. :p
2. I listed a song quote at the beginning of this chapter from a song called: "Don't Think That I Can't Feel You When You're Gone" - The whole chapter (at least where Sakura and Kakashi are concerned) was kind of built on the premise of that excerpt. When Kakashi tries to do right by leaving her and tells her that she won't even notice his absence; Sakura opens up and really kind of makes herself vulnerable in a sense by admitting that she in fact always feels his absence... To have someone so embedded under your skin like that is just incredibly romantic, and the way Kakashi reacts to her confession is just all the more precious.
3. I've taken up enough of your time by over-explaining my motives on that, haha, but I truly hope you have enjoyed the story up to this point. As always, I am ever so grateful for the likes and reviews. Thank you, and happy reading!
~Sparrow
