"Without You"
A The Devil Wears Prada Fanfic
by JennedyJLD / JKSophieJane
Getting to the hospital had been a far more complicated task than Miranda had anticipated.
The news that the American journalists were en route to Lenox Hill was the top story on all of the major networks and websites. What few eager photojournalists and columnists were not stationed at the airport or hospital were ensconced outside the Priestly townhome, where they formed a gauntlet of video cameras and microphones. Emily, God bless her, had anticipated that this might be the case, and arranged for several uniformed NYPD officers to contain the paparazzi and create a wide enough berth for the occupants to enter and leave their home.
Miranda and Andrea's parents left the house first, and took the brunt of the onslaught from the reporters as Christopher tore off in the Mercedes. Jonathan and the twins (who had taken great care in packing a suitcase full of items from home that Andrea might appreciate during her hopefully-brief hospital stay) followed in the Porsche, and took an alternate route, in a mostly-futile attempt to pull some of the press juggernaut away from the lead car.
Having received special permission due to the media attention, Christopher pulled the car close to the ambulance entrance and scurried around to the back of the car to open the door. Miranda filed out first, followed by Judy and then Richard. The threesome charged past the sliding doors, where they were met by a large security officer who had been informed of their impending arrival.
"Back here," he said, and signaled for them to follow.
Miranda left her large wraparound sunglasses on as she followed half a footstep behind the security guard. Judy's hand clenched Miranda's forearm through the thick trench the white-haired woman wore, and the fall of her sneakers provided a soft one-two beat with the clacking of Miranda's heels as Richard shuffled anxiously just behind them.
The guard stopped outside the door, and Miranda nearly crashed into his shoulder. She huffed irritably as he slowly pulled the door back, and assessed the room. He turned around and shut the door. "They're taking some blood," he told Miranda and the Sachses. "Let's give them just a minute – not enough room inside for everyone."
Miranda frowned, and noted that Judy's and Richard's expressions mirrored her own. After having waited so long, she didn't want to put off seeing Andrea for another moment. She was also quite miffed that Andrea had been in the hospital long enough for the staff to set her up and start taking blood before Miranda had arrived. As soon as she was able to focus on anything but the happy fact that the love of her life was resting safely on the other side of the door, heads to-be-determined would roll. But she steeled herself and breathed deeply, knowing that the long week of waiting would soon come to a happy, certain conclusion.
After several seconds, each one containing endless eternities, the door opened. A young woman wearing a white lab coat left, carrying a tray with several vials of blood. Andrea's blood, Miranda realized. She looked at Miranda, and did a double take when she recognized her. "You… you can go in," she said quietly, and hurried out of the way.
The guard opened the door, and Miranda inhaled sharply as she realized that she was positioned at the wrong side for entry. Judy and Richard entered first, and Andrea's eyes were already locked on her mother's when Miranda slipped in last.
Miranda tried to keep her composure, but felt a small gasp escape when she caught sight of Andrea for the first time in nearly two weeks. Although she had never given up all hope of seeing Andrea alive again, Miranda felt a twinge of apprehension as she realized that this was not at all unlike seeing a ghost. Andrea's gaunt appearance did little to relieve that feeling.
The still-beautiful young woman was positioned in the center of the hospital bed, propped up on flat pillows with the thin blankets covering her. Miranda was instantly grateful that she had instructed the twins to include a comfortable blanket and pillows from home in Andrea's suitcase. Andrea's eyes were heavy-lidded and red-rimmed. Dark circles sat atop hallow cheeks, and Andrea's hair was duller, thinner, although she had been permitted to shower at the hospital in Islamabad. She appeared to have lost several unnecessary pounds and aged several years over the last few days, and Miranda wondered how long it would be before the color returned to her lover's precious face.
Andrea's mouth opened slowly, and then closed quickly, as if she were searching for the right thing to say and had given up before finding it.
Miranda swallowed hard, her eyes focused on Andrea's until they turned to her. She took three painfully long steps forward, and felt the world swim around her. She opened her eyes a moment later to find that she was leaning over the hospital bed, her fingers clasped around Andrea's hand as she pressed a gentle kiss to Andrea's cheek. She was vaguely aware of Judy Sachs taking a mirrored position at Andrea's other side, and felt Andrea's head move as she kissed her mother's cheek, and then turned to brush her lips softly against Miranda's. That small contact, chaste in any other context, Miranda realized, was perhaps the most intimate embrace of their relationship.
Richard was the last to arrive at the bedside, leaning next to Judy and kissing the crown of Andrea's head. "Hey, Kiddo," he said, trying to force a smile out of his trembling lips. Miranda watched Andrea's face contort in a similar manner as she, too, tried to smile. But she failed, where Richard succeeded.
"Hey," Andrea finally said, her voice hoarse and small. "I guess it'd be kind of stupid and obvious to say it's good to see everybody, huh?"
Miranda closed her eyes tight, pinching back tears that she refused to cry in front of Richard and Judy Sachs. In front of Andrea, maybe. After things had returned to normal, maybe it would be all right… but not now. Definitely not now, while Andrea was so clearly in need of assurance and was probably looking to Miranda for a sign that everything was going to be all right. So, instead of letting the tears fall, Miranda gave Andrea's hand a tiny squeeze.
Andrea squeezed back. "Miranda," she said gently, and then let her hand fall away from Miranda's so that she could stroke her cheek. Brown eyes locked on blue, and for the first time, Andrea managed a small smile.
Miranda looked at Andrea, not speaking as they spent a tender moment becoming reacquainted with the lines and features of one another's faces. When Miranda realized that Judy and Richard were exchanging somewhat uncomfortable glances at the obvious love between their daughter and the woman for whom they had come to feel a real, but grudging, respect, she cleared her throat softly. "How are you feeling?" she asked, genuinely concerned, as Andrea was as close to looking like hell as Miranda had ever seen her.
Andrea exhaled, her brow furrowing. "Um, not so good," she admitted, which Miranda appreciated. She'd have seen through a fib in a heartbeat. "I'm kind of sore, and I guess I'm not exactly oriented. I feel a little dizzy, because I didn't eat much this week."
"You're skin and bones," Judy acknowledged.
Andy looked at her mother, and shrugged slightly. She looked at Miranda, and in a ghost of her usual grin, attempted to crack a joke. "Ask Miranda. It won't last long. Just let me get my hands on some fries and ice cream, I'm golden."
Miranda patted Andrea's head softly, thinking that if it made Andrea happy, they could build a McDonald's in the living room.
"I think the hospital's thinking more along the lines of Ensure and protein shakes, though," Andrea whined. "I have a few sprains, a cracked rib, and-"
"A cracked rib?" Miranda interrupted. "You didn't say anything about that."
Andrea looked at her with a thoughtful, though not apologetic, expression. "I didn't want you to be up all night worrying about it," she said.
Judy huffed. "Andy, what else?"
Andrea touched Miranda's arm, tracing it with her fingers as she spoke to her mother. "That's it, Mom. Really. I'm lucky."
"What about your blood sugar?" Richard asked, pulling up an uncomfortable-looking seat and positioning it near the foot of the bed.
"They took care of me at the hospital in Pakistan," Andrea insisted. "And I'm being monitored here. I'm gonna be fine." She leaned back against the pillows. "Eric's in a lot of pain, though. And I want… I want to see Kevin's parents," she said. "They're in Delaware. Eric and I are going to visit them as soon as we can," she said. The decision had been made. "It could as easily have been one of us."
"I don't want to think about that," Miranda said, feeling horror and anxiety creeping back over her.
Andrea gazed at her. "I have to think about that," she said, resolutely. "I have to think about that every day. We're alive because Kevin isn't."
Miranda's eyes widened, and she nodded wordlessly, unsure how to respond.
Judy rubbed Andrea's shoulder gently, and Richard rested a hand reassuringly on her leg. Miranda tentatively brushed her fingers through Andrea's hair, stopping occasionally to rub her earlobe affectionately. For several minutes, no one said anything – and then a rolling thunder filled the hallway.
Andrea sat up straight, her face brightening into what was her first genuine smile. "I've heard that before," she smirked.
Miranda took the opportunity to kiss Andrea's cheek again. "At least there are no stairs outside."
The door flew open, and Caroline bounded gracelessly into the room, her twin sister hot on her heels. "ANDY!" they screamed at once, and flung themselves toward the bed. Miranda and Judy were forced to move out of the way as they crawled up the bed and situated themselves on either side of her.
Andrea laughed. "Watch it," she said, in mock-annoyance. "You're gonna mess up all these wires and stuff."
Caroline looked up, horrified that in her rush to deliver a hug, she may have killed Andrea.
"Relax," Andrea teased, and kissed both their cheeks softly. "I'm not hooked up yet. That particular pleasure comes in a little while."
"Dad went back to the house to get his stuff," Caroline said, looking at her mother from the other side of Andrea. "Then he's gonna come pick us up." She made a face. "I want to stay here with Andy."
Miranda lifted an eyebrow. "A little crowded for that, I think," she said. Of course, she had no intention of leaving Andrea tonight, even if she had to fight Judy and Richard both to the death for the right to be at Andrea's side.
"When are you coming home?" Cassidy demanded.
Miranda looked on in amusement, wishing for a moment that she had the lack of self-consciousness that her daughters possessed. What she would have given to throw herself onto the bed and wrap her arms around Andrea the way that they were doing at that moment…
"I don't know," Andrea answered. "As soon as I can, you know? They just want to keep me here for a little while to make sure they know if I've got anything else wrong with me. No biggie." She eyed the suitcase they had brought from home. "I really hope there are donuts in there."
Caroline rolled her eyes. "Like Mom lets us have donuts."
Miranda rolled her eyes right back.
Cassidy beamed. "But there's cookies," she announced.
Andrea's face brightened. "Yeah? Chocolate chip?"
"Duh," Caroline smiled. "It's the only kind we know how to make. Cass, go get the cookies."
Cassidy scowled. She hated to be the one forced to get up, but she got to her feet anyway, freeing up some space for Miranda to lean in closer to Andrea. When she returned with the cookies a couple of minutes later, Andrea's eyes grew exponentially. "C'mon, Cassidy," she mock-whined. "Hook me up before the nurses bust us, huh?"
Cassidy joined in the laughter that erupted throughout the room, and shoved a cookie at Andrea's grateful mouth.
Three hours later, after Jonathan had collected the twins and Andrea's medical team had performed all of the tests they deemed necessary, Andrea was clearly struggling to keep her eyes open. Miranda, who had already replaced the horrible hospital bedding with her own superior blanket and pillows, felt her pulse begin to race at the realization that there simply wasn't room enough in the hospital for her and Andrea's parents.
But Judy, who had apparently already given the matter some thought, looked up at Miranda as soon as it became clear that Andrea was done with conversation for the evening. "Miranda," she said softly, "why don't Richard and I ride back to the house with Christopher? You stay here with Andy."
Miranda looked at her, a little surprised by the enormity of her sacrifice. She knew that were she in Judy's position, no army would have been able to rip her from Caroline's or Cassidy's bedside. She looked to Richard for confirmation, and God love him, he was nodding.
"We talked about this," he said. "We won't be alone tonight. You shouldn't be, either." He walked to the head of the bed, and brushed Andrea's long bangs out of her eyes. "Sleep tight, Kiddo," he said gently. "We'll be here first thing in the morning, before you get up, probably."
Andrea nodded, her eyes not fully open as she kissed her parents goodbye.
Judy leaned down, and kissed her sweetly. "Goodnight, Baby," she whispered. As she left the room, she hesitated, and then walked over to give Miranda a small hug. Surprised and moved, Miranda returned the embrace and kissed Judy's cheek.
Ten seconds after the door closed behind them, Andrea turned to Miranda. "I must have died, and no one told me," she announced.
"What on earth do you mean?" Miranda demanded.
Andrea chuckled. "My mom just hugged you. You kissed her."
"Her cheek," Miranda pointed out, as if this made all the difference in the world.
Andrea rolled her eyes. "Come here," she invited, and looked at the small space next to her on the bed.
Miranda lifted her eyebrow. "Are you sure? Will you be comfortable? There's not much space…"
Andrea stroked her fingers against the back of Miranda's neck. "There was enough room for two twelve-year-olds," she pointed out. "I need you close to me. Put on your pajamas and get into bed."
Miranda pressed a gentle kiss to Andrea's lips as she stood, walked to the suitcase, removed her pajamas, and slowly changed into them. She knew Andrea was tired, but tried to add an extra sensuality to her disrobing in case she was being watched. When she turned around, though, Andrea was already snoring softly. She had lost many hours of sleep to Andrea's habit before, but tonight it was perhaps the sweetest sound she had ever heard. Miranda walked quietly up to the side of the bed, and lowered herself onto the thin mattress. She wrapped an arm around Andrea's waist and held her gently, her head tucked into the space between Andrea's shoulder and neck. She breathed in the sweet scent of Andrea's skin, and opened her palm against Andrea's taut stomach.
"Goodnight, my love," she whispered, and when Andrea didn't reply, it was all right. Completely all right.
