Disclaimer: IDOM
Chapter 6: Of Pasts and Fathers
"Sister is probably the most competitive relationship within the family, but once the sisters are grown, it becomes the strongest relationship."
-Margaret Mead-
The small group made their way slowly through the sunlit forest, their horses slowly trotting along the wide path. It was a beautiful afternoon; the sun lighting up the forest nicely and making it glow. The forest itself was teeming with life; a rabbit darted into a bush, a small doe galloped over a fallen tree, and the ever-present bugs made their horses' tails whip even more than usual. The temperature wasn't that bad either, even in their chainmail and the sun beating down on the weary group wasn't too hot. None of the Knights were complaining at least. Not that Percival had anything to complain about with his no-sleeves. Gwen was wearing one of her older dresses, the lavender colored one. It framed her face very well, bringing out her natural skin and hair color. Gaius himself worn a blue robe, the color of it highlighted his snow white hair as it skimmed the surface of his shoulders, as well as the white mare he rode on.
The group had left Camelot a little after dawn. The stable boys had had their horses ready on time as Arthur came marching down the front pearl-white steps. George followed him at a respectful distance carrying Arthur's things. Everyone was there waiting, their horses already packed and ready to go. Gaius had brought some supplies in case of emergencies, because something always happened when they left Camelot and Gwen had packed the leather bag she was making for Merlin. The Knights just packed whatever they wanted, mainly just the necessities...although Gwaine had brought a few skins of ale and mead with him. 'For later,' he had said.
Wonderful.
The horses slowed to a walk as they did every few minutes, their mane's still fluttering with their gait.
"Are we there yet?" Gwen said. She and Gaius were the only ones that hadn't ever been to the Valley of the Fallen Kings. Gaius had had objections to going there, but Arthur reassured the elderly man that nothing would happen. Eventually Gaius had caved, reasoning that Merlin wasn't there, so there might not be any trouble. The other side of his brain was reasoning that if something did happen, then they also wouldn't have Merlin to protect them.
"Almost," Arthur replied. He turned around to smile at her, she returned the smile, then looked pleasurably off into the forest.
It really was beautiful. Not that he'd say it out loud. He'd been through here a few times, but it seemed like the environment changed every time he passed through. A new tree sprouting there. A shrub that wasn't over there before. The birds were louder as well, the chicks begging for food from where they lay in their nests high in the trees.
Arthur remembered the last two times he had been through here, neither were very pleasant memories, but he had nothing else to do as their horses trotted through along the brown path.
The first time, he had been hunting here, just Merlin and himself. They had just woken up, packing up their stuff when about twenty or so bandits burst through the trees on their right. Naturally...they ran. They just took off, pelting through the forest, jumping over tree roots that were threatening to trip them up, to leave them at the bandits mercy. Arthur was sincerely hoping that Merlin's clumsy side wouldn't come into play and trip him. Lucky for the both of them, it didn't.
Anyway, they ran right past the twenty foot statues of two different kings as they entered the Valley. Merlin, for some reason, had stopped and started staring at the statues. Great time to stop and smell the flowers Merlin! Right when they're bandits behind us! Arthur had thought. Soon he himself had slowed down as well and Merlin began questioning his wisdom of coming here and if the place was haunted. 'Only if you believe in that stuff,' he'd said. Then Merlin had said that they had to keep going, but Arthur had said that the bandits wouldn't dare follow them in here. Just as he finished saying it, the bandits were behind them. Talk about jinxing something, Arthur thought, smirking to himself. For some reason, that was always happening. Will it happen now? Arthur questioned. No, this is just a short vacation.
Anyway, while they were running, Arthur ended up with an arrow in his back. Great! Just the time to get shot. Merlin had helped him stumble over to a trench that was under a fallen log. At least, that's what Merlin had told him. He was knocked out. Merlin had told him that he'd hit a rock on the way down, but he didn't remember there being rocks when he fell.
Apparently, Merlin just waited for Arthur to wake up after he'd been shot. 'It didn't pierce your chainmail.' That he might believe, he did in fact. How else would he be alive? But knocking himself out? That was something Merlin did, not the king. Well, he had been a prince when that all happened. But it didn't matter! Royalty didn't knock themselves out!
After he'd woken up, Merlin had been acting really weird, Arthur remembered. He'd been all grumpy and just not the happy-go-lucky Merlin he knew. He seemed nervous, scared. And he'd been that way for a few days afterward too. Then he was normal and carefree again.
Arthur rolled his eyes. It was just like Merlin to act like a girl.
The second time they had been through here, it had been Merlin, the Knights, and himself. They had been on a mission to sign a treaty with a neighboring kingdom, but they'd been intercepted by a group of bandits. They weren't just any bandits either, they had been organized mercenaries. At the time, Arthur hadn't known who had organized it. He'd suspected a lot of people; the Knights, Gaius, his uncle. But after his uncle's betrayal he came to the conclusion that it had been his uncle. In fact, it had been his uncle who had set him on everyone else's trail. He had been fixing the blame on others by using the 'I'm your uncle, I could never betray you,' bit.
That had lead to Arthur's questioning Gaius in the end because Arthur was confident because of his uncle. He'd been asked if he knew Emrys, the sorcerer whom had killed his father. Or rather, couldn't help his father and who the blame was fixed on. Arthur knew Gaius had lied when he'd said he didn't know and had never met Emrys. Then there was the whole deal with Gaius being kidnapped. Afterwards Arthur had asked him why he had lied about Emrys. Gaius said because it would have been a mistake to seek him out. He said he'd done all he could to help his father, but he couldn't. Arthur knew he hadn't been lying then. His light blue eyes held such sincerity that Arthur knew it to be true. It was the first time when Arthur started thinking that even magic had its limitations and that maybe all magic wasn't evil, that it was just individuals who had made wrong decisions.
Anyway, the last time they had come through and been attacked by the bandits, Merlin had been badly hurt. He'd been hit with a mace to his shoulder, which had resulted in a very bad wound. He hadn't been able to walk on his own without support, and then when they thought they'd lost the mercenaries traveling through the Valley of the Fallen Kings, they'd attacked. Arthur had set Merlin down so he could fight, but suddenly, just when about ten men were rushing him, there was an avalanche, rocks cascaded down the impossibly steep cliff, cutting him off from the injured Merlin. Arthur had screamed his name long after the rocks had settled, not receiving a reply. He had climbed up the slope, trying to get to the place where he'd set Merlin, even though he was sure that the bandits had taken him. When he's climbed over the peak, he had found himself correct that Merlin had indeed been taken. There was only a pool of blood where Arthur had set him, all the movements from Arthur carrying must have reopened the large wound. Arthur had been extremely close to breaking down then, a few tears had slid down his cheeks as he quickly lost hope of ever seeing his closest friend again. There weren't even any tracks to follow. Arthur suspected they'd covered them.
Once he gotten his wits back, he'd decided that he had better regroup with the Knights before searching for Merlin. It would be no use trying to find him by himself. Once they'd all arrived at Camelot, he'd immediately sent a search party for the manservant, headed by his treacherous uncle. That was also the first time he'd met George. Uh! But with Arthur worried out of his mind, he eventually decided to go search for Merlin himself, but Gwaine had volunteered himself to go with. Arthur hadn't really minded, Gwaine was like a brother to him, one of those few people that had treated him like a person rather than a king. So they'd gone, and just as Gwaine was telling Arthur what he liked about Merlin, which Arthur had wholly agreed on, they found him. He'd been in a bog. Merlin told him that he didn't remember much, just that when he woke up, lying facedown in a mud filled bog. He'd acted strangely when he returned from that too, acting snotty, and, dare Arthur say, a prat. Then he went to the tavern for two days as Gaius said, and came back acting completely normal again. Why did something always go wrong when they were around the Valley of the Fallen Kings? And why did Merlin always act weird afterwards? Arthur just chalked it up that it was just timing, and that nothing was going to go wrong on this trip, and that Merlin was just being a girl. Other than that, nothing was odd about the location.
Arthur was pulled out of his musings as Gwaine's deep voice sang through the air.
"Here we are!"
Arthur focused his eyes on two very tall statues of kings. Both were standing tall, oblivious to whatever was happening. They were covered in moss, though the immaculate details engraved in the wood were still present. The statues might have been made of wood and stone but they still demanded respect.
Arthur's horse crossed the threshold into the Valley, Arthurs blonde hair falling backwards as he gazed up at the tall figures. The horses walked into the Valley, now going slower because of the rough terrain. There were cliffs on either side of them, draped in moss and green overgrowth, making everything look eerily pretty.
"There's a clearing about an hour from here, we'll set up camp there." Arthur called back, making sure everyone could hear him.
"Uhh!" Gwaine groaned comically, rather loudly, also making sure everyone could hear him.
The horses trotted along the narrow path as Arthur called back, "What?"
"I think Gwaine's a bit saddle sore," Elyan called back, laughing.
"I am not!" Gwaine replied, feigning indignation. "I am merely concerned for Gaius and our queen's welfare."
Gaius laughed heartily and Gwen quickly added her high pitched voice into the laughter.
"Thank you Gwaine, but I'll be alright," Gaius grinned.
"Me too!" Gwen agreed.
Gwaine rolled his eyes. "Ah! Fine then! Thanks for the help guys!"
Guinevere laughed.
"Looks like you're outnumbered Gwaine," Leon said.
"It's only an hour," Percival put in, looking behind him.
Gwaine grumbled a reply under his breath, shifting in his seat, trying to settle his aching bottom. They continued on in silence the rest of the way, admiring the scenes around them as they rode on. The horses kept trotting at a steady pace as they passed different cliffs, small gullies, running streams, and tall trees.
They finally reached the small clearing. Dead leaves were strewn here and there, the light brown contrasting with the green grass and moss that covered everything. Leaves that were still alive were scattered more around the clearing, the reds, yellows, tangerines, and all different shades of green ambushed the leaves. A long-fallen tree lay near the center, covered in different shades of green. All the greenery gave it a very tranquil feeling.
"Here we are!" Arthur announced.
"Yes!" Gwaine sang happily. He jumped off his horse, his knees almost giving way for riding all afternoon Everyone dismounted their noble steeds, Arthur assisting Guinevere, whose dress made it difficult to dismount. Percival assisted Gaius, his robe also making it difficult but more that his age made him less able to mount and dismount a horse. They all unpacked their things from their horses, laying their things haphazardly around the leaf-strewn clearing.
It was near dusk now, the sun tired from hanging in the sky so long. As it fell towards the horizon, it cast a golden glow about the place as crickets began their chours. Elyan grabbed a large pot off the ground that Gwen had set by her bed roll, his chainmail clicking as he walked.
"Where are you going?" Gwen asked. She was kneeling over a clump of firewood that Leon had quickly gathered, trying to light it with a flint stone.
"Thought I'd make dinner," Elyan relied simply. "I was going to the stream to get some water."
"Sounds good to me," Leon said happily. Out of the seven of them, Gaius, Gwen, and Elyan were by far the best cooks. Gaius had learned from experience, and Gwen and her brother had learned from their mother before she had died.
Elyan rolled his chocolate brown eyes and made his way over to the stream a few yards away. It wasn't far at all, still in sight of the camp. He dunked the large pot under the water and filled it about halfway with the cool water. He walked back over the camp to find that Gwen had got a roaring fire going and had set up the stand to hang the pot from. Elyan gave his sister a nod of thanks and hung it from the center. With the water warming up, he, Gwen and Gaius all gathered the ingredients and put them in the pot.
Arthur and the rest of the Knights were sparring together out of boredom. None of them really knew how to cook except for Gwaine and Percy, but they didn't usually cook anyway. Leon and Arthur hadn't ever the need to cook, being raised as nobles. They were having fun either way sword fighting with thick sticks. They didn't want to hurt each other using their swords. Plus, Gwaine's hand was still opening every now and then from where he'd cut it the day before. It was smaller, and Gaius had said it didn't need stitches, but to save his right hand, Gaius was having him spar with his left, making his movements awkward and slow.
"I don't think I'm ever going to get used to this," Gwaine laughed.
"You won't have to. Your hand should be fine just as long as you're not injured again," Gaius replied smiling. The latter bit of the sentence had been said with pointed eyes at Leon who smiled deviously. He wouldn't hurt Gwaine, but he thought the idea was rather funny to think about, especially after the pranks Merlin and Gwaine had played on them all.
They all rushed over the fabulous smelling concoction that lay in the pot as Guinevere called for dinner. Elyan handed his sister bowls, and she dished them out accordingly.
"This is delicious!" Arthur said, swallowing his stew.
"Hm," Gwaine agreed.
Percival and Leon only nodded their approval, too engrossed in the stew to verbally agree.
Gwen laughed, her brown curls momentarily covering her face. Gaius and Elyan laughed as well. The faces of the four eating knights were just too comical not to.
Once the pot was licked clean, not literally thankfully, Gwen stood up to wash it. Elyan grabbed her arm as she began to stand up, his short form matching hers, and gently took the pot out of her hand. She gave him a questioning look.
"We - you - are on vacation, you don't have to do all the work you know," he said smiling. Gwen's brown eyes twinkled in amusement. It was just like Elyan to do her job.
"Thanks, Elyan," Gwen smiled gratefully.
Elyan walked over to the stream and washed the pot, then he walked back to the camp and put it with the rest of their stuff. It was dark now, the sun having set whilst they were eating.
"I'm going to get some more firewood." Arthur announced. He stood up from the log he and Gwen were sitting on and sheathed Excalibur, the metal going into the holder with a renowned zing.
"I'll come too!" Leon said bored.
They went off into the forest, disappearing from sight as the shadows of the forest welcomed them in its embrace. In the distance an owl 'who'd.' The crickets chirped as the campsite was silent, everyone lost in their own thoughts. It was Gwaine who finally broke the silence after a few minutes.
"So, what do you guys think Merlin's doing right now?" He asked tiredly.
"It's a bit weird without him here isn't it?" Gwen put in, unintentionally avoiding Gwaine's question. Every time she's gone out of Camelot for some reason, Merlin had always gone with her, either picking herbs for Gaius, or just going for a walk. He was like a brother, and it was strange for him not to be here.
"Yeah, it feels like I keep forgetting forgetting something," Gwaine said. Merlin was always around, and Gwaine was usually right there next to him.
"But to answer your question Gwaine," Gaius said, "I'm sure he's having a good time. It's good that he went to see his mother."
Percival nodded. "What is she like Gaius? Some of us have never met her," he laughed. "I've only ever heard Merlin talk of her."
"Well, she's much like Merlin himself. Brave. Compassionate. Determined," Gaius said. "She puts others above herself."
"One of the bravest women I know," Gwen put in. "Very kind, but firm when needed, patient, very wise too."
"Must run in the family," Gwaine said, looking pointedly at Gaius.
He laughed, smiling widely. "Well, thank you Gwaine, but I don't think I'm that wise."
"Hm. Humble too then," Percival laughed, drinking from his cup.
"Must run in the family," Elyan added, laughing.
The small group laughed collectively, silence finally settling back in after that as the fire crackled and popped, sending sparks of life out into the night.
"What about his father?" Gwaine asked, suddenly sounding somber. Merlin had told him he met him once, right before he died, but he never actually talked about him.
Percival, Elyan, and Gwen all looked interested in that. They'd heard him talk of his father in passing, just that he'd never known him, and that he died, but never anything real. Gwen was especially interested. Arthur had told her that Merlin told him that he'd never met him, but then Gwaine said Merlin told him he had met him. It was very confusing. Gwen wasn't sure which to believe.
Gaius had to think of how to answer that. If he avoided the question, it would seem suspicious and rude. They might drop the subject, but Gaius thought that Merlin kept enough secrets. He knew that Merlin had been waiting for the right time to reveal his secret now that Arthur was king and he was beginning to believe that not all magic was bad, but maybe he could help things along? He wouldn't tell them the whole truth, no, just enough to quell their curiosity. To let them know a bit of their friends past without revealing too many secrets so they can give him support if he needed it.
"Well, he had to leave before he even knew Hunith was pregnant with Merlin," he said, sighing.
Gwen's eyebrows scrunched with confusion. "Had to? Why?"
"I'm afraid I can't answer that, I made a promise to both Merlin, Hunith, and his father."
"Did Merlin ever meet him?" Percival asked, very interested.
"He told me he did, right before his father died," Gwaine said, which made Guinevere look pointedly at him. Gwaine had told her that Merlin had met his father, yes, but not the circumstances surrounding it She couldn't imagine meeting her long lost father only to have him die a few days later. Merlin must have been so heartbroken. Suddenly, Gwen just had the urge to find Merlin and give him a big, comforting hug.
Gaius' eyes softened as he spoke, the firelight dancing off his pupils. "Yes, it was a few years ago. I finally told him the identity of his father, and he went off in search of him, though for different reasons. The journey had already been planned before I revealed his identity. Merlin met him briefly, though I can imagine he must have been overjoyed to meet him father. One morning, their camp was attacked, and Merlin's father was run through protecting Merlin." Gaius said sadly. "He was a great friend, and would have made a great father."
"That's horrible," Gwen exclaimed hotly. "Why didn't Merlin ever say anything? Why'd he go through it alone? It must have been terrible!"
Elyan wrapped her in a one armed hug, holding her tightly. Percival and Gwaine stared at Gaius, equally shocked at what their friend must have gone through by himself
"Well, you know Merlin, he never pushes his problems on others," Gaius said, his head lowered as he looked thoughtfully into the flickering fire.
The group nodded slowly. It was just like Merlin.
"So who was he, Merlin's father?" Percival asked.
"It's not my secret to tell, I'm sorry. But he was a good man...a great man, with great dreams. He and Hunith were perfect for each other; both with hearts the size of the moon."
"Hunith!" Gwen thought suddenly. "Does she know what happened?"
Gaius nodded. "Merlin made the trip and told her not long after it happened. I imagine it gave her peace, not having to worry about him any longer. Merlin seemed less depressed when he returned, I suppose Hunith helped him through it."
Gwen smiled sadly, thinking along the same lines. She had never seen Merlin cry, but she was sure that he had then. Arthur told her in confidence that he'd only ever seen Merlin cry once; after the Dragonlord Balinor had died. Wait! Arthur told her that he had cried. That Balinor had died protecting Merlin. Then Merlin had taken a trip not long after that. The story lines matched. But that meant...that meant that Balinor was Merlin's father. Balinor, the last Dragonlord was Merlin's father. The puzzle pieces of her friend's past clicked into her mind as she came to that realization. She just stared determinedly at Gaius, whom of which was still gazing into the fire.
"How long ago was this?" Gwen asked. She had to be sure.
"What? Oh, a few years...five or six," Gaius said. He almost decided not to tell the timing, but he didn't think it would make a difference, none of the knights were there at the time. Gwen had been, but by the look in her eye, she had already figured it out on her own.
Gwen took in a sharp breath, her suspicions confirmed. She remembered five years ago; well, five and a half. It had been when the dragon had attacked the very city that had held it captive for so many years; attacked Camelot. They had had no way of stopping it and Gaius had announced that there indeed might be one last Dragonlord left to control the beast. Uther had given his blessing to Arthur, more or less, to go in search of him, and he and Merlin left that very day. They'd come back from their journey without Balinor, and Merlin had seemed very sad. Gwen had thought she'd seen tear tracks on his cheeks when they had returned, his eyes had been slightly red, and his face slightly flushed, but with everything going on, she hadn't the time to approach him. Then Arthur, Merlin, and some Knights had gone to face the beast, some had been killed, though most were knocked out, Arthur included. Gwen now though that maybe it had been Merlin that killed the Great Dragon rather than Arthur.
She looked pointedly at Gaius and when they're eyes met, hers conveyed a questioning glance. Gaius knew she'd figured it out, there was no reason to mislead her any longer...so he just barely nodded. Guinevere opened her mouth to ask Gaius something when Arthur and Leon came sauntering out of the forest, arm laden with thick sticks and twigs, smiling and laughing. They quickly stopped, surprised at the somber mood of the camp, before setting down their finds by the fire and looking around confused.
"What happened?" he mouthed to Elyan.
"Tell you later."
Guinevere raised her head from where her brown eyes had been fixed on her lavender dress and stood up.
"I'm going to go for a walk," she announced.
Arthur was about to offer to come with her, when Gaius jumped in.
"I'll come," he needed to talk to her anyway, to ask her to keep Merlin's secret.
Arthur watched them go thinking that, whenever he was troubled, he went to Gaius for advice. He was sure Gaius could help her. Besides he wanted to know what he missed.
"So what happened?" Leon asked, beating him to the punch. Why did someone always take the words right out of his mouth? Just like...
"Merlin," Gwaine replied quietly.
Speak of the devil...
"So...what happened?" Arthur questioned. 'Merlin' wasn't an explanation.
"Do you know anything about his father?" Elyan said. He didn't want to just throw it on Arthur, he'd rather ease him into it.
"He told me he never met him." Arthur replied. He remembered when Merlin had told him that too. Merlin and himself had gone on an unexpected journey to find Morgause after she'd beaten him in a tournament. She'd let on that she'd known Arthur's mother, maybe personally. So, naturally, Arthur wanted to know what. On the road, they'd stopped for the a bit, Arthur revealing the real reason he was going on the quest; to find out what she knew about his mother. He understood the reasons, saying that Arthur's past with his mother was like his with his father; never met, hardly talked about, nothing but a story.
"Apparently he did meet him," Percival said.
"Gaius just told us that Merlin met his father only a few days before he died that he'd been protecting Merlin when he was run through," Elyan explained. "Merlin never told anyone though."
Arthur was speechless. Merlin had met his father? His father had died? What?
"How?" He asked, regaining his thoughts.
"Gaius told him who his father was and he went in search of him," Gwaine said sadly. "Apparently he found him."
"But -" Arthur started. He was flabbergasted at what he'd learned about his best friend.
"Yeah," Gwaine said quietly.
They all made silent packs with themselves that they'd have a word with Merlin when he got back, make sure he was alright. It might have been five years since his father's death, but keeping it bottled up like he always did made it worse, and they wanted to be there for him. To let him know that he could tell them things like that. So they all stared at the crackling orange flames, lost in their own thoughts as the moon continued to rise in the sky.
Gwen and Gaius walked slowly away from the camp, their feet crunching leaves underfoot. They were silent as they walked a little ways, trying to get far enough away so everyone else at the camp wouldn't overhear them. Gwen spotted a fallen log a short distance away and made her way to it. She sat down folding her skirts underneath her as Gaius sat down next to her, the camp's fire just a twinkling star in the distance.
"You know?" Gaius started slowly.
Gwen nodded slowly, her chocolate curls falling slightly in her face and brushing against her collarbone.
"Balinor? Balinor was Merlin's father," she stated simply. She looked into Gaius eyes, daring him to contradict her. She knew he was right when Gaius' blue-grey eyes softened, revealing the more fatherly side of the man. Gaius took her hand as he explained.
"Yes," Gaius replied. "Balinor left because Uther was hunting him for being a Dragonlord and he didn't want to endanger Hunith. Uther said the power of a Dragonlord was too close to the art of magic. He gathered all the Dragonlords together and killed them, Balinor alone escaped with my help."
Gwen stood up and started pacing, suddenly furious. "So it's Uthers fault! How many families did he break apart because of his hatred of magic? How many people didn't know their father? Their mother? Their son? How many people have suffered? Merlin must hate Uther, and I wouldn't blame him! What Merlin must have gone through! If Uther wasn't dead, I would give him a piece of my mind!" She rambled.
Gaius eyebrows were high on his forehead as he walked the girl rant. He'd never seen her so angry, but he guessed that a friend's suffering did that to people. His surprise ebbed its way into amusement as a small smirk grew on his face.
"I'm sure you would," Gaius laughed, then more soberly, "So you're not mad at him for not telling you?"
Gwen returned to her seat as she composed herself again by taking a deep, calming breath. She was still furious at the passed king, but she had more important things to worry about.
"Well, maybe that he forced himself to go through it alone. I mean, he had you and Hunith of course, but still, he needed someone his own age to help him. But not really. I know why he didn't tell anyone. You said that Uther had killed all the Dragonlords, and the son of a Dragonlord would have been just as bad. Merlin must have been scared out of his mind that Uther would find out and have him killed."
Oh, he was scared of execution long before he knew about his father, Gaius said to himself. But he wasn't about to tell Gwen that. She would learn when Merlin was ready. Gaius was already feeling guilty about her finding out about Balinor.
Turning his attention back to Gwen, he nodded at her wise words. "Correct. And he also didn't tell you because if it came out that you knew, you'd be charged same as him for harboring him."
Gwen rolled her brown eyes. "Just like him to put his friends well-beings above his own problems," she muttered.
Gaius gave her a fatherly smile.
"So does that mean that Merlin is now the last Dragonlord?" Gwen asked. "Did he defeat the dragon?"
Gaius nodded. "He's the last of his kind. When his father died Merlin inherited his fathers gift."
"It must be so lonely," she said, lowering her head. She knew what it was like to feel lonely. She didn't really have any friends until Merlin came. She'd had her father, but after he'd died... Even then Merlin had been there for her.
"Well, now he has you," Gaius said, while using his finger to raise her chin.
She smiled, looking more relieved and happy that she could now help her best friend. She certainly owed him.
"Gwen... I need to ask you something," Gaius started, still holding her hands.
Guinevere looked at him, his pale hair was framing his face, and his blue robe almost blended into the night. His eyes had a seriousness about them that told her what he was going to say next.
"Can you keep this secret?" He said.
"But Arth-"
"Isn't ready." Gaius finished. "I'm sure that he wouldn't blame Merlin for it, but Merlin needs to be the one to tell him. I'm not sure that Merlin is ready for it."
She thought about it. Yes, Arthur was still opposed to using magic openly, but he'd been forming his own opinions on the subject. He'd been lenient towards sorcerers, but he was still uncomfortable, and if he found out that his best friend held such a secret...something so akin to magic. Then Gwen thought that Gaius was right. On both accounts. If Merlin hadn't told Gwen, or Gwaine, or any of the other Knights about his father, then what made her think that he would just go ahead and tell the King. Arthur was his best friend, but he still had a responsibility to Camelot, and if Arthur found out from anyone other that Merlin himself he would feel utterly betrayed. Gwen knew Arthur could never kill Merlin, but she didn't want him banished either, she knew what that was like, and it was horrible. Horrible and lonely. She guessed he'd already been through that enough, so she slowly nodded her head.
"Ok," she replied.
Gaius breathed a sigh of relief. "Are you sure you can keep it secret from Arthur?"
"I promise, I won't tell anyone," she stated firmly. She wanted to be trusted with this.
"Thank you Guinevere." Gaius said. "But you should tell Merlin you know when he gets back," he added, laughing.
"I will, but let me do it alright? I don't want him getting scared about my knowing."
"Alright," Gaius agreed, smiling. "Come on, we best get back before the others get worried."
They got up off the moss covered log and Gaius enveloped Gwen in a warm, fatherly hug.
"Thank you," he said sincerely. It was one more person Merlin didn't need to lie too, at least about being a Dragonlord, and for that Gaius was grateful. Now Merlin had someone his own age, someone that could relate to losing their father at a young age.
Gwen hugged him tightly back, she was glad that she knew now, that she could help Merlin. It might have been five years ago, but even her father's death, which was almost six years ago, still hurt.
They broke apart, helping each other as they made their way along the rocky pathway. Gaius joked about Merlin's clumsiness, lightening the sober mood, making Gwen laugh and joke right back with him. They walked back to the camp with light hearts and renewed hope.
The duo arrived to a group of solemn looking knights staring at a dying fire an based on the serious looks on Arthurs and Leons faces, Gwen and Gaius guessed they had been told. They exchanged looks as Gwen when to stoke the fire and add more wood. Gaius went over and sat beside Gwaine on a log.
The group, realizing they were back, broke their glaring contest with the fire, blinking several times to erase the orange glow that appeared every time they blinked. Arthur noticed that Gwen was significantly less downhearted and he was less sad just seeing the small smile on her face. The others noticed too, and were also brought out of their sober moods.
It had to have been about midnight now, and Gaius announced he was going to bed. They all said their goodnights as he walked a little ways to his bedroll. Slowly each of the Knights said goodnight, and made their way to their respective makeshift beds.
It was only Gwen and Arthur left staring into the flames, though for similar yet different reasons. Gwen was trying to figure out how best to approach Merlin with her knowledge and Arthur was trying to figure out how he would confront Merlin about this and how to best help him.
Gwen eventually stood up and stretched. "I'm off to bed. Arthur?"
Arthur broke out of his trance as she said his name. "Hmm. What?"
" Are you coming?" She asked gently.
"No, I think I'll sit a little longer," he said tiredly.
She knew why he was in a saddened stupor and bent down to take his hand, her brown locks reaching towards the ground.
"He's alright, Arthur," she said softly giving him a small, reassuring smile
He hummed a reply, clearly not believing that was the full truth. Gwen sighed and grabbed both his temples, pulled his head forward, and kissed the top of his head. She moved her hand under his chin to raise his head.
"Goodnight, Arthur," she said with a small smile. He stood up and hugged her tightly and she hugged him back, both still sad over their friend. She pulled back and gave her husband a goodnight kiss, then walked over to her bedroll, her purple dress dragging on the leaves. Arthur sat back down on the log, and rested his elbows on his knees with his forefinger running across his mouth.
Gwen laid down on her blanket, falling asleep as she listened to the crackling fire and singing crickets, dreaming of wayward friends, dragons, and fathers.
