I don't think I am fully express how much I appreciate all of the reviews for this story. I think the love this time around is more than it was the first time. I have seen how stupid I was by leaving. You all make the bad feels go away and only bring good ones. xoxo
Life Support
EPOV
She is here!
What?
She is here!
Holy shit, she is here. She came back. She came back for me.
She came back because she wanted to be here.
With me.
She wants to be with me.
My head was spinning and I was holding Bella's hand, probably a bit too tight, but I didn't want to let go. Not now, not yet. Maybe not ever.
I knew Bella made me act different. Something about her made me feel something I had never felt before, and I loved it!
We sat in silence, looking at one another. She was in jeans and a sweater. She looked beautiful. Bella in a skirt and heels as I saw her last week was gorgeous, but in jeans and a sweater, relaxed, she was amazingly beautiful...and perfect.
"Hey, why don't we get you off the floor?" she asked.
"I, uh… " I didn't want to get up. This was our spot. Our place.
"Edward, I'll move with you. We can sit on the couch and it will be far comfier."
I nodded and removed my hand from hers so I could stand, but once on my feet, I reached for her once again.
I led her to my couch. I let her sit on the couch and I sat in the chair next to it.
Holding her hand was one thing, but I didn't think I would be able to touch her on any other level, so I needed the distance.
"Edward?" Her voice was quiet and airy.
"B-bee-ella?" My voice cracked three times trying to say the simple two syllables of her name. I was less nervous sitting on the floor where we first connected than here, just ten feet away.
"Take some deep breaths, okay?"
I nodded my head and did just as she asked. She didn't move her hand from mine, she didn't try to get any closer; she just sat there and looked into my eyes.
Her eyes were beautiful. This rich caramel looking color. Brown but not too brown. Some people's eyes resemble mud with their brown. My father's, his were mud brown, but Bella's were rich and light and I could dive in and stare at them for hours. I never wanted to stare at anyone like I wanted to stare at her.
"See, you're doing beautifully. Keep at it, Edward."
Bella's words were relaxing and soothing and l couldn't have asked for someone better to be holding my hand. No one had ever just held my hand other than my mother, and that was many, many years ago.
I squeezed her hand just a little tighter than I had already been. I slowly moved my other hand toward where ours were already joined.
My breath caught in my throat and I closed my eyes as I moved my other hand to hers. My hand surrounded hers like a sandwich. I kept my eyes closed and I continued taking deep breaths.
"If it's too much, Edward… " Her words trailed off when I opened my eyes to look at her.
"I-it'ss not."
I took a few more deep breaths. I wanted to be able to talk to her without sounding like a complete idiot.
There was so much I wanted to ask her. So much I wanted to know, but more than anything was why?
I took a deep breath and tried my best to keep my heart beating slowly, but even the thought of talking to her made it speed up.
"Be-Bella?"
"Yes, Edward?"
The way she said my name made my heart speed faster. I took another deep breath. The last thing I wanted her to see was me having a panic attack. I was still embarrassed for the one I had with her over the phone.
Fuck, remembering that wasn't helping. My breathing sped up more.
"Slowly, Edward. Please breathe slowly."
I closed my eyes again and tightened the hold on her hands. "Why… " another deep breath. "Wwwhy aa-are yyyyou hh-here?"
"Because I care about you."
"B-but w-wa-why d-do yyy-yooou c-c-ccare?"
"Because you are a good man."
"Yyou d-don't know that-" I took a deep breath and felt confident that I was finally able to keep my words mostly together.
"Edward, I can tell. You didn't ask for this, but it is what it is and I want to be here for you. When Carlisle told me you hadn't moved, and when I realized that not a second had gone by since I last saw you where I didn't think of you, I knew I needed to come back."
I dropped my head. Of course Carlisle told her. Was she really only here because he asked her? Was the rest a lie? My nerves were in overdrive. So much for talking without sounding like an ass.
"Wo-woould yyy-you ha-have ccome if-if he hadn't asked?"
"Most definitely. I almost came over the weekend, but I didn't think it would be appropriate, and after how it was when I walked in last week, I didn't want to just show up."
"Bbbut yu-you ss-st-ttill did."
"Because I knew that you wanted me to." She smiled at me and the smile was readable all over her face. From her eyes to her chin. She was truly happy to be sitting here, just holding my hand.
BPOV
We held hands and it was so much more than you would expect by just holding hands. Words couldn't describe the feelings I felt, by having him simply hold my hand. For him I knew it was the most he had ever felt, for me it was more than I ever imagined a simple touch to feel like. Once he came to the realization that I wanted to be there, he seemed to relax, a little. Granted, Edward relaxing was still extremely stress ridden, because he was on edge constantly so it seemed.
The silence between us was calming. Normally, sitting across from someone you hardly know, while holding their hand in complete silence, would be nerve-racking, but with Edward it was soothing.
My phone ringing in my purse broke the serenity, and unfortunately, I had to answer the call.
"I'm sorry I have to get that."
He looked at me and I could see the pain emerge on his face. He closed his eyes and nodded his head. He removed his one hand from the sandwich he had made around mine. His other hand lingered on mine and I didn't want to remove it.
I didn't at all, but he dropped his hand and I was left, hand suspended midair, no longer touching him.
I quickly went to my phone and looked to see who it was.
The text was from my paralegal, Jessica: Issue with the Carson suit. HELP!
Fuck and shit! Carson was a huge client and if I could seal the case, I would have a secure job at the firm for as long as I wanted it. I quickly texted her back.
Can't you handle it? It's one afternoon. I'm busy.
I knew in theory I could be committing career suicide, but if Carlisle knew my worth like he said he did, he would understand.
The choice I was making was for the long term, too, just not necessarily my long term. Selfless was what they called this, right?
My phone rang again. I looked at Edward, he looked broken apart and I hated that me being a mere ten feet away was doing that to him.
Bella, if I could handle it, I wouldn't be messaging you.
Instead of messaging her back, I put a note to myself in my phone to fire her. Well, at least find out how I could go about having her removed as my paralegal.
Stupid incompetent bitch.
I was about to message her back, when my phone rang again.
This time it was an email.
To: Isabella Swan
From: Carlisle Cullen
Date: Tuesday, May 24th 2011 1:14 PM
Subject: Carson Suit
Ms. Isabella,
It has come to my attention that you are being bothered for work duties while you are with my nephew. Please, take your time with him and I will attend to these matters.
Right now, he needs you more than we do.
I will see you tomorrow, Ms. Swan.
Regards,
C
Carlisle Cullen
Head Partner Cullen, Volturi, and Denali Law Firm
Well okay then. I emailed Carlisle back a quick thanks before texting Alice quickly to let her know all was well. Then, I silenced my phone and threw it back into my bag.
I turned to look at Edward. His head was in his hands. He looked as if he was crying, without the tears. The pain and anguish was there, just no moisture.
"I am so very sorry about that. Can I come back and sit by you?"
He didn't move. He didn't respond, as I slowly made my way back to him.
"Edward, please look at me."
Nothing.
I really didn't want to start back from the beginning every time we broke apart. I wanted to stomp my feet and yell at him. I wanted him to not sink back away from me. I wanted him to jump up and be happy at the fact I was back.
Instead, I sat back where I had been sitting, reached for him and pulled his hand from his face.
He lifted his head and smiled.
"Don't do that, Edward. Don't get upset when I have to walk away."
He broke eye contact and looked at his lap.
"Don't do that either. I want to be here, but sometimes I have to let go, but know I will come back every time."
He quickly glanced up at me.
"Edward, how about we do something? Will you show me around?"
His eyes got wide.
"Or how about a shower? You have been in these clothes for a week."
He looked away, then back at me. "Ma-maybe a g-good idea, huh?"
I nodded at him and reached for his other hand. He willingly let me take it. We walked side by side to the kitchen.
"Wa-waant a drink?"
"Sure, what do you have?"
He opened the fridge with his other hand. "Wa-waaater and Ccoooke."
"Water is fine."
He handed me the bottle and a thought entered my head. "Edward?"
He looked at me, his eyes welcoming. Maybe he was starting to warm up a bit.
"How do you get all this food here?"
He smiled and it was comforting to see. "Pp-eap-pod. Th-they dddeliv-ver."
