June 2012
Tony didn't really think about what Phil living in one space with him would mean. Sure, they've spent a day or two more than a few times, staying extremely close to each other, but it was something different. If you see someone from time to time, you focus on something completely different than the everyday stuff you're forced to share when you're living together.
Phil moved in Stark Tower before everyone else because of the lung surgery he had – luckily the spear didn't hurt his heart – and he needs calm place supervision for some time, in case something happens. All the Avengers are supposed to move in, they just wanted time to wrap up their personal stuff and organize the whole moving in process.
The thing is, Tony gets hurt a lot. It's a constant when you're an inventor, something always happens and Tony doesn't have the patience to engage endless safety protocols - not that they would help… He gets burns and cuts and bruises and that's perfectly normal, there is first aid kit in the workshop and he has Butterfingers dress the scraps and minor wounds and it's fine.
Only that Phil doesn't think so and he worries entirely too much and Tony can't make him stop. Tony's been trying to distract Phil from being so concerned, but it hasn't been really not working. It's absurd because it should be Tony to worry about Phil, serious surgery, rings any bells? But apparently things like that cannot be rationalized.
So Tony came up with such a Tony thing to do.
'I have a great idea, we're gonna have a party,' he states one morning. Phil looks up from his tablet with his eyebrows arched perfectly.
'Stark.'
'Agent –'
'Are we back to name-calling?'
'You started it,' Tony pouts, standing in the middle of the big space of the living room. It feels as if each of their breaths echo loudly. 'You know, a welcome party? The team's moving in this week and we could have strip dancers –'
'Tony.'
'– and shiny confetti and my favorite DJ, he'd love to come over to New York –'
'Tony, please.'
'– and I'd have Pepper get me Roseen's catering, have you tried that, seriously, it's the best thing I've encountered and I've eaten lots of food all over the world –'
'I won't sleep with you for a week if you don't shut up.'
Tony does go silent suddenly and sits down because sleeping with Phil doesn't only mean sex, it means talking for hours and waking each other up from nightmares and cuddling and lots of nice things.
'I don't mind a party, but your eardrum-blasting music are not necessary, you moron. Or party hats, in case you're wondering. We won't be wearing party hats.'
'What do I think I am, five?' Tony pouts, but Phil's glare says that he thinks exactly that.
'I don't know about catering. Do it if you want, but maybe everyone could just make something –'
'Like a dinner party?'
'Just like an informal dinner party. And no strippers – well. Just imagine Steve and Bruce with half-naked dancing ladies around.'
'I'll claim you use them as an excuse for your own embarrassment, come on, have you ever had a girl walking out a giant birthday cake –'
'Sometimes I don't even know why I bother,' Phil sighs and Tony shuts up because he keeps wondering about that himself; they are total opposites, if you think logically, the only more opposite pair of people Tony can think of in himself and Fury. 'Okay, so we'll have a party. With food, some music – JARVIS, can you take care of that?'
'Of course, Agent Coulson,' the A.I. replies instantly and Tony smirks because JARVIS' voice has this hint of smugness that Tony loves and that no one else notices, not even Pepper or Rhodey.
'We can hang out in the roof garden afterwards,' Tony adds and Phil smiles at him as if he was slightly surprised. 'What? I know you guys will all like that place. Great view, like, billion dollar view, and I can have one of the bots serve us fancy cold drinks with tiny umbrellas.'
'Sounds like a plan,' Phil says easily.
That's a nice change. Tony kind of expected him to say don't come up with that crazy Tony Stark things anymore; Tony knows perfectly that Phil prefers him in the calmer homey mode, even if he enjoys Tony being his crazy self in moderate amounts.
'So, next Monday?'
'Next Monday,' Phil confirms.
'… are we telling them?'
'I thought we could wait? A few weeks.'
'It's not like it's their business,' Tony agrees. They talked about it a lot and there's no special reason for that, but they would both prefer to be Tony and Phil to the very limited number of people for some more time. 'Good,' he adds, placing a kiss on Phil's forehead and standing up. 'I gotta go to R&D. See you at lunch?'
'Sure thing,' Phil agrees and Tony disappears in the corridor.
At five o'clock on Monday Tony and Phil and coming home from a check-up appointment with Phil's doctors; everything is healing up fine, which is very good and worth celebrating so Tony takes Phil to his favorite ice-cream place on the Eastern coast.
The dinner is happening around seven so they should still have enough time to take care of everything that wasn't prepared earlier or by the bots with the two of them were out, but that's just minor details – and dressing up. Tony's homemade pop tarts are waiting in the kitchen safely and they are, like Phil said, the most important part of the evening, at least for him. And Tony even managed to make sure Phil didn't eat any before the big event, which counts as a big success.
So when they enter the penthouse and meet five pairs of eyes staring at them with disbelief they know straight away that something isn't as it should be at all.
'I tried to stop it,' JARVIS supplies, his voice ringing in the silent room. Tony vaguely notes that the dinner things are all prepared on the big table, save the dishes that are to be served hot, and the place looks very nice with subtle decorations – oh, he sighs, noticing someone sitting in the back of the room.
'Did we invite Fury?' he asks Phil, turning slowly to look at him, but Phil's face says enough.
'Not at all,' Phil replies and shuts his lips tight.
'That is why I was pretty wounded,' Fury replies across the room and the Avengers – minus Natasha, because she's Natasha – all look at him and then back at Tony and Phil as if it were a tennis match.
'You absolute bastard,' Tony whines dramatically, knowing that it's not that much of a big deal, the team knowing, but really, they wanted to choose the right moment and setting themselves, and all the jazz. So they have the right to be annoyed, Tony decides.
'I wasn't aware you didn't share your relationship status with teammates,' Fury says in a sweet voice and everyone knows he's lying; the tone is somehow still harsh and intimidating and Fury keeps his face perfectly straight.
There's a long moment filled with thick silence; the rest of the Avengers seem to be waiting for something and Tony decides that screw everything, if the game is on they can give the audience a show.
'Agent?' Tony asks, raising an eyebrow at Phil who offers him a slightest nod.
'Stark,' he replies and quickly kisses Tony on the mouth.
'So whatever Fury told you about us, it's true, blah blah, did you bring food?' Tony says quickly. 'I think Phil mentioned something about your casserole, Hawkeye, it better be good, and Cap, close your mouth and don't gape at me like that, it's unbecoming of an American icon. JARVIS, start the ovens, we need some heat in the kitchen, do we have all the ice I wanted ready for the drinks, some people here seem like they'll need a lot of drinks –'
'Tony, stop,' Phil says softly into Tony's ear, making him stifle a giggle at the tickling sensation around his neck. 'You're being too fast. I think they need a moment to wrap their heads around how is it possible that can I stand you,' he adds, his voice loud enough for the others go hear him, so Tony knows Phil's playing along. 'We'll go and change into some proper clothes and you take your time,' Phil adds, with a perfectly straight face, and drags Tony back into the elevator.
They come down a few minutes later, dressed in slacks and shirts and ties and the clothes are perfectly matching on purpose. They look really, really good, in Tony's opinion. JARVIS tells them the same, in his nicely smug voice, and Tony sticks his tongue at the nearest camera because JARVIS always tries to placate Tony with compliments and it totally works.
'He's so like you,' Phil comments, shaking his head is amused disbelief, and Tony grins.
''Course he is,' he agrees and adjusts his tie.
'May I have one suggestion?'
'Yeah?'
'Could you give them some of the pop-tarts now? They'll just eat and stay silent and we can wait for the comments until after inner. I don't particularity want to listen to Clint's questions and Natasha's comments while eating, believe me, they can be pretty silly sometimes –'
'Isn't that just an elaborate scheme to get your hands on my cookies ahead of schedule?' Tony asks, kissing Phil's temple and then shoving him into the elevator. 'You already got dinner almost two hours early, so –'
'It didn't really cross my mind, but that's an excellent idea,' Phil declares earnestly, making Tony sigh and wonder did he get himself into all this. Phil's sneaky and Tony loves that, but sometimes he likes to mock being annoyed.
'I guess we can do that,' Tony decides when they walk into the living room to find the team standing in a circle and chatting, but then suddenly fall silent when they hear footsteps.
Tony sighs again and then snickers.
'Come on, schoolgirls, Agent here thinks you need a bribe to stay silent so that he can eat his dinner in peace and I decided to sacrifice some of my finest for the cause,' Tony says as he walks up to the bar and pours some of his best whiskey into eight glasses, over finely crushed ice. Then he walks up to one of the cupboards behind, opens the lock with a ten digit password and puts the big plate covered with pop tarts on the counter.
They seem unsure about why are they supposed to eat dessert before dinner – poor people, if they have never done that, Tony comments in his head – but Thor is the first one to reach out for the cookie and put in into his mouth.
'This is a strange delicacy,' he declares in his loud voice a moment later. 'Lady Darcy showed me a variety of similar pastries, and many more different kinds, but no one of them tasted quite like this one. Here, try, friends,' Thor adds, taking the plate in his hands and offering the cookies to teammates. 'These are most excellent. Where can I acquire them?'
'You can't,' Phil replies instantly, flashing Tony a small grin and nodding at Thor solemnly. 'Tony made them. He's an excellent baker.'
'… I might begin to understand,' Clint says indistinctly, his mouth full of the crunchy sweet goodness.
'So I'm brought down to what I bake now, hmm?' Tony murmurs around his glass. He has to admit that everyone is indeed focused on the food in their hands and mouths.
'If it works,' Phil replies quietly, standing next to him and finally taking a bite of the cookie; Tony kisses him just a moment later.
'You taste like sugar,' he says and smiles. No one minds them this time.
A/N: Thanks for your patience! I was having an absolutely inspiration-less weeks and I actually baked like ten different things in the meantime, but none of them seemed fitting for this.
So there. I actually tries pop tarts like twice in my life, they are sooo expensive here and they only sell one or two flavors. They were so sweet hah. That's why I usually like the homemade stuff better (besides Mars ice cream, it's like the thing, seriously, I think I'll have some b-day ice cream later today ;p) If you want to see the recipe, it's on my tumblr & the link is in my profile :)
