Oops, I totally forgot to update, sorry about that!
Anyway, thanks everyone for reading! Glad you like the story!
Enjoy,
love,
Monday, December 23, very very early
Well, yesterday didn't end too well.
But I guess I should have seen it coming.
Oops, the doctor is here, I gotta go.
Monday, December 23
I don't understand why everyone is so angry.
I mean, Grandmere is furious. She has locked herself in her room leaving Rommel in the care of Vigo. She ordered enough ingredients for about a hundred Sidecars and she is making them HERSELF! Yes, I enraged Grandmere so much that she prefers making her own Sidecar to facing anyone!
Dad has locked himself in the sports quarters where he is playing squash or something, since his doctor has told him it is a good stress reliever. Dad even sent Natalia to the spa because he cannot deal with her right now.
And looks like Pierre will be fired.
And René deported back to Italy or to any country that will want him.
Everyone is overreacting. I mean, it's not like I did it on purpose! It just … happened!
Though I guess I can understand why PR team will say that I have flu. It might not be a good idea to tell the whole world why I am unable to attend any formal events today.
Here's what happened -
7:55 pm yesterday: I am still in my room. Sebastiano is walking around me, saying I look too pale in the dress. Apparently I am not as tanned as I was in the summer when he made the sketch of this dress.
7:56: Sebastiano has a freak out, worrying about what Grandmere will say because apparently I look like a walking plague. Or at least that what I think comes out of his mouth.
7:57: make up team tries out another color of lipstick but ultimately decides for the fadest shade of red.
7:58: last minute change of shoes: Sebastiano decides that white Gucci shoes work better with the dress than those in the shade of beige.
7:59: dinner is supposed to start in a minute and I am still in my room, trying to balance myself in new shoes, which, by the way, are a size too small. Sebastiano keeps saying my feet must have grown and does not want to even consider that he might have ordered the wrong size.
8:01: Sebastian decides that he is doomed anyway and lets me go. I run down the hall to the dinning quarters and surprisingly I don't fall. But I can feel the blister on my foot forming.
8:02: I meet René in front of the entrance. There's a smell of cigarettes around him and he looks rather flushed.
8:03: I tell René that his shoe laces are undone. He leans forward to tie them when he loses balance and falls over. He hits a nearby table and knocks over a vase. His shirt is now soaked with water. One of the servants has seen what happened and runs to help him.
8:04: we enter the room. Grandmere doesn't even notice us nor René's wet shirt; she is chatting away with Arne and I don't think I have seen the golden bracelet on her wrist before.
8:07: we greet all of our guests. Grandmere totally wasn't kidding when she said she planned to use Arne's visit for Genovia's benefit. She invited all the Genovian finance experts – well, at least all of those that are older than 70.
8:10: Kjetil introduces me to his girlfriend – René was right, she is stunning. She has long blond, slightly wavy hair, striking blue eyes and curves. My inferiority complex kicks in.
8:21: am stuck listening to war stories of a former finance minister.
8:23: the palace band starts playing traditional Norwegian music. Grandmere starts clapping and singing along.
8:26: Grandmere goes on stage and joins the band for a song.
8:29: Arne joins Grandmere and they sing the duet. It is in Norwegian and I don't understand a word (when did she have time to learn it? Daily visit of which famous fashion designer did she cancel in order to have more time to study Norwegian?) but I am rather sure it is a duet from hell.
8:31: René too wants to go on stage but Grandmere pushes him away - I think she finally notices his wet shirt as he leaves the room immediately.
8:33: René returns wearing the same shirt and with his first wine bottle of the night in hands.
8:35: we sit down for dinner. I sit between René and an elderly man who, if I remember correctly, is a retired finance advisor to the biggest Genovian casino.
8:40: war stories have turned into hunting stories. I didn't know Genovia even has enough forests to produce so many anecdotes!
8:43: René tells me that hunting is actually a fun activity and not cruel to animals at all – apparently it is necessary to help nature maintain its balance. HOW CAN IT NOT BE CRUEL IF IT KILLS LIVING CREATURES? AND ENDS WITH EATING THEM?
8:48: the soup is brought. Things start looking up – it is not made of meat. It is Pierre's signature pea soup.
8:52: a gentleman sitting next to me hasn't moved in a while. I am afraid he might have died; Grandmere's signing voice is certainly harmful enough to cause damage.
8:53: René does not want to listen to my worries. I think it is because a new bottle of wine has just been brought. It is some expensive French brand René cannot afford.
8:55: the gentleman has finally moved. He is not dead. Yet.
8:57: my shoes become super tight all of a sudden. I try to take them off without using my hands or looking down but Grandmere sends me warning look. Does she have multiple personalities or something? I mean, she totally looks 17 right now, being all flirty and laughing out loud – but which 17-year-old would care if someone in their 10 meter radius was taking their shoe off?
8:59: I notice that René keeps looking down at his lap.
9:03: I lean closer to René to see what he's looking at – he's watching Friends on his smart phone!
9:06: I start coughing into a napkin to hide my laughter.
9:19: main course is brought – a steak and mashed potatoes with cooked carrots.
9:21: I look over my shoulder and see Pierre looking at me though the open kitchen door. He just shrugs apologetically – he was too afraid of Grandmere to make a special dish just for me.
9:23: great. Now what am I supposed to do? I don't eat meat!
9:25: is it too late to get some cyanide for Grandmere's Christmas present? I mean, obviously she won't get me anything I want.
9:33: Grandmere keeps looking at me, making sure I'll eat the meat.
9:34: now Dad starts looking at me too. Did he finally realize that his new girlfriend has boob implants?
9:39: I excuse myself to go to the bathroom, hoping the plates will be gone by the time I come back.
9:46: Natalia, Dad's girlfriend joins me in the bathroom. I am forced to listen to a rather loud phone call in her native language – I don't catch a word she says but she does not sound too pleased. Is she too a vegetarian?
9:48: dark circles under my eyes are back. I am chronically under slept.
9:51: I return to the table and my half full plate is waiting on me. Grandmere sends me a malicious look.
9:52: Dad's phone starts ringing. He smiles mysteriously at me when he excuses himself and leaves the room. He completely ignores Grandmere's evil eyes focusing at him.
9:53: seriously, why am I not allowed keeping my phone in my purse during formal dinners? It would make everything so much more fun!
9:54: I guess it is because they don't think I have anyone to send texts to. Well, they are probably right even though they don't know it – due to this stupid time difference, it's middle of the night where Michael is. He wouldn't see my desperate texts till morning when I'd most likely be already sleeping.
9:56: I am getting desperate. The majority of people have empty plates in front of them but mine is still half full. And Grandmere is not pleased about it! I am not going to eat that meat! I just won't! Why can't anybody understand and respect my vegetarian beliefs?
9:57: I think I'll establish a law in Genovia that will make vegetarians equal to meat-eaters. I don't know how I'll do it but somehow I will. I mean, I am the princess, right? If Grandmere found a tattoo artist crazy enough to tattoo the eyeliner around her eyes, why couldn't I pass this bill?
9:58: but then again, traffic lights are still non-existing in Genovia. And I have been trying to change that for years now.
9:59: and smoking has still not been banned. And it most likely won be as long as Dowager Princess is alive.
10:00: a loud noise comes out of the kitchen. Everyone turns to the kitchen door to see what is happening. When I look down to my plate, I see the meat is magically gone. Rene winks at me with his mouth full, then he grabs the bottle of the expensive wine again. I so owe him now.
10:02: Grandmere looks at me. She totally knows I wasn't the one who ate the meat. She doesn't approve it, at all.
10:05: René opens another bottle.
10:07: who ate Grandmere's food? She is looking at Arne as if she hasn't eaten in ten days.
10:11: René decides to go get another bottle of wine, because he does not like the last wine he has opened.
10:12: I remember the last time René left the dinner 'to go check on something' – he was later found in front of a casino in Monaco, so intoxicated he didn't know his own name, wearing pants inside out. Afraid that something like this might happen again I decide to follow him.
10:14: I find René in the kitchen where he's eating Pierre's desserts.
10:15: I tell René that we should return to the table as Grandmere is particularly sensitive this week because of her special guests. René tells me to stop being such a 'Mia'. Pierre starts telling me about the cakes he has prepared for the night.
10:17: the band starts playing again. Rene starts humming along as I give in and try Pierre's cake – the one he describes as 'hazelnut cake made with a combination of toasted hazelnuts and a soft meringue. This cake is then filled with a decadent hazelnut mousse and dark chocolate mousse. An extraordinary cake loaded with hazelnut flavor.' Whatever it is, it is delicious.
10:19: René who now doesn't look very sober anymore takes my hand and starts dancing with me around the kitchen. Since I don't have any balance in high heels and he is drunk we crash into a pile of dirty dishes. Now René's shirt is not only wet but has a chocolate stain on.
10:21: we try to wash out the stain. One of the waitresses slaps him after he says 'how's it goin' babe?'.
10:23: Pierre asks me if I managed to convince Dad to 'spare the poor cat'. I have no idea what he is talking about since I haven't heard anything about any cat so I ask him what he means. Pierre tells me that for the past week a white cat has been seen wandering through royal gardens. Gardeners and janitors have tried to catch it but it always got away. So Dad called the local shelter and they are coming to get the cat in the morning. The waitress adds that the poor thing will most likely be put down because there are so many stray cats already plus this one seems unsocialized.
10:25: the thought of any cat being put down is just too horrible. From all people, my own DAD will give the kitty to the shelter where they'll KILL it? There's no way I am letting it happen. I drag René out to the gardens to help me find the cat.
10:29: René asks me what I plan to do after we find the cat. Hello? It doesn't take a super high IQ to figure this one out – I will save it from getting killed!
10:41: Rene feels that this situation is perfect to remind me of two years ago, when I started feeding stray cats and it took the palace staff a whole week to get rid of them. After he says that this cat must be late for the party, I punch him in the shoulder. Luckily, this time he does not stagger back and hits anything – if he did, he would fall straight into the fountain.
10:42: well, maybe René taking a bath in the fountain would not be such a bad thing; maybe it would wash out the chocolate stain on his shirt.
10:44: René carefully says that maybe we should head back – we have been away from the table from a while. But honestly, I don't care what Grandmere does to me, I just want to save the cat. I mean, we are talking of a living creature here, how come nobody understands?
10:49: René starts complaining of the cold. Imagine how the cat must be feeling? Plus, he has all that alcohol in his veins to keep him warm. Besides, winters in Genovia are not by far cold enough for anyone to freeze to death.
10:53: Pierre rushes to us and says the desserts will be served in ten minutes so we should return to the dining room. I won't go anywhere until I find the cat. Maybe my own cat hates me but at least what I can do is save this innocent creature from certain death. Pierre, who guessed what my reaction would be, brings along a jacket and hands it to me so that I wouldn't catch cold. And he offers to help us find the cat.
10:56: the winter garden is seriously beautiful. We have the best gardeners in the world. I must remember to pay them all a cruise around the Mediterranean as a thank you.
11:00: the cat is still missing and desserts are to be served so Pierre has to go inside.
11:05: René screams that he has found a cat. I run to him and see that a cat is hiding on the tree.
11:06: René asks what we will do now and I tell him we are getting the cat off the tree. Rene reluctantly agrees to climb the tree to get to the cat.
11:07: he starts climbing.
11:10: it turns out he is too drunk to climb.
11:11: whatever. My ancestors did such amazing things – Amelie established democracy in Genovia. Rosagunde … ok, maybe what she did wasn't so amazing but she was still a strong, determined woman – AND NOW I CANNOT EVEN SAVE ONE CAT? I have it in my blood to fight for what I believe in – even if it includes climbing the tree.
11:12: I start climbing. It is really not as difficult as I thought it would be.
11:13: I can almost touch the cat which is looking at me with its big, scared eyes when a heel of my Gucci breaks. My leg slides off the branch, I let out a scream but am not quick enough to grab the branch above me.
11:14: I crash to the ground.
11:15: I lie on the ground, unsure of what has just happened. Rene too is baffled and just stares at me, unsure of what to do.
11:16: the cat jumps off the tree, meows and runs away.
11:17: René seems to have woken up from his trans. Sadly, the first thing he does is start screaming: I KILLED THE PRINCESS! I KILLED THE PRINCESS!
11:18: Pierre comes running to us, accompanied by François, who has something that appears to be chocolate around his mouth.
11:19: I assure everyone that I am fine – well, minus the sprained ankle. But François does not listen – he shouts at René to go call the doctor.
11:20: Dad and Grandmere come rushing to us. When Grandmere sees me lying on the ground with a broken Gucci and a torn dress, she screams out for a Sidecar. Dad kneels in front of me and starts asking what happened. I tell him that I was just trying to sort out his mess since he sentenced the poor kitty to death. Grandmere screams that I must have bumped my head because I am talking of stray cats again.
11:22: René comes back. Kjetil is right behind him, holding his phone. He is about to take a picture of a Genovian princess lying on the ground but decides not to when Dad sends him a dirty look.
11:24: I reassure everyone that I am fine but Dad forbids me from getting up. He is not too sure of my self-diagnosis that I only have a sprained ankle. I tell him that I know how it feels when René interrupts me that feeling ok is completely normal after suffering a head trauma. I ask him what he means by that but Dad just screams at Pierre to accompany René inside.
11:26: royal doctor finally arrives. He confirms that I have hurt my ankle. François takes me to my room.
11:30: tea awaits me on my night stand.
11:33: royal doctor says I am fine. I ask him if it is really normal for patients who suffer head injuries to initially feel perfectly fine and he says it is true. Then I ask him how can he then be sure that I have not suffered any head injuries. He just smiles and says he just does then he excuses and goes to talk to my Dad.
11:35: I am slowly sipping tea as I remember Natasha Richardson. She suffered brain bleed and the symptoms didn't start showing for the whole hour. Oh my god.
11:37: I get out of bed ad run to the doctor who still talking to my Dad. I scream MY BRAIN MIGHT BE BLEEDING RIGHT NOW BUT THERE ARE NO SYMPTOMS YET YOU NEED TO SCAN MY HEAD. Grandmere asks what I am talking about and I tell her about Natasha Richardson. And people say following pop culture is a waste of time. It might have just saved my life.
11:40: doctor is trying to calm me as well as Grandmere down but it is not working. Grandmere: now listen to me, young man! My family has built the med school you have gone to and the hospital where you work nowadays! Am I really asking for too much when I ask you to take a good care of my granddaughter here? Mind you, we paid for your education and now we cannot even have her head scanned?
11:43: Grandmere is given a dose of sedatives and I am taken back to bed, doctor once again reassuring me I am fine. Dad goes to get a Martini.
11:48: Sebastiano enters my room, upset and says he has heard 'I got kill'. I assure him that I am feeling better (if the doctor is to be believed). When he sees what has happened to my shoes, he looks on the verge of tears. Great, my cousin is less worried about me possibly bleeding to death than about the shoes. What is up with the Gucci, by the way? Why do the Gucci heels keep breaking right when I need them most?
00:25: Sebastiano is escorted out of my room because 'the princess needs rest'.
00:40: Dad enters the room to check on me but I pretend to be sleeping.
00:58: everythnig seems quiet so I get out of my bed to look for the phone. I guess I should let Michael know I arrived to Genovia and that things are well.
1:14: I cannot find my phone.
1:20: I hear steps outside my room so I rush back to my bed.
1:23: Grandmere enters my room but I am pretednign to be sleeping again. Which, I guess, does work since the next time I look at the clock it is already 8.
So here I am now with a sprained ankle. Not that I am blaming the shoes but they played a big role in ruining Grandmere's dinner.
Well, at least the cat survived.
To Be Continued.
Broughttoyouby:::winter.
