Let's Be Enemies
By: Ridley C. James
A/N: Wow. I can't believe Jack is gone. From the show, that is. It's still hard to reconcile, but I hope this chapter helps us miss him a little less tonight. One more chapter to go. There will quite possibly also be an epilogue. This of course is only one version of how Jack could depart compared to his reasons for leaving in cannon. I couldn't bear to kill him off, and I couldn't let him leave Mac because I don't see anything short of death or incarceration forcing him to do that. I can't wait to see what other writers come up with. As for the new character, it remains to be seen how or if she will factor into this AU version. Enjoy! Thanks to Mary, as always.
RcJ
"Matty, thank God. How's Mac?"
Jack Dalton had not seen one single person, sans the guard who'd brought him regular meals in at least thirty-six hours, maybe more. He'd lost track of time, his facial hair trick not as effective when he'd gone days without shaving even before he'd been thrown in the brink. So even Matilda Weber with war in her eyes and the threat of holy damnation vibrating in each determined step was a welcomed sight.
"What the hell were you thinking, Jack?" Matty slammed her hand on the table that separated them, the one Jack was currently shackled to. This was already shaping up to be far worse than their last interrogation session when Matty had demanded to know if Jack had broken into her apartment because now Jack was not only wearing metal bracelets but was sporting a putrid orange jumpsuit and paper shoes. His old friend didn't seem to hold any sympathy for his situation. "Pointing your gun at Oversight! And Bozer! Are you completely off your rocker?"
"I wasn't aiming at Bozer," Jack defended, leaning forward so his elbows were on the table. He was pissed that James had not only managed to squirrel him away in a holding facility in Zurich but that he'd not allowed him any communication. Not one single word about Mac. "And I asked you a question, Matilda!"
"You don't get to ask the questions, Dalton!" Her words were just as sharp as his, but Jack recognized the flash of something besides anger in her dark gaze. She took the seat in front of him. Frowning. "Blondie is fine," she growled. "When I left the hospital this morning he was itching to be released."
"After so short of a stay. Is that normal?" Jack wracked his brain, trying to remember how long Thornton had stayed under medical care after her appendectomy. He was certain it was more than a day.
"He's stayed two full days, which is one day longer than I expected considering the situation and how your partner doesn't ever do anything the 'normal' way." She made air quotes when she spat the word 'normal' as if it wasn't in Mac's vocabulary.
"Damn." Jack ran a hand over his mouth, unable to reach his hair due to the short length of chain connecting him to the table. "It's been longer than I thought. Is he really okay?"
"Physically he's on the mend. You know, Mac." Matty held his gaze.
"I do know him, which is why I've been nearly out of my mind with worry." Jack understood better than anyone how his partner's brain worked. When Jack wasn't there when he woke up, Mac would have assumed the worst. Even if Bozer explained, the kid would have found a way to twist things so that he blamed himself self somehow for the mess Jack had created.
"From what I understand things did not go well when he first came to," Matty hedged. "Bozer and Dr. Accola handled it, although Mac insisted on being brought to Zurich instead of taken to the closer hospital in Bern."
"You're not giving me the warm and fuzzies here, Matty." Jack pinched the bridge of his nose, fighting off images from the numerous worst case scenarios he'd run through during his time in solitary. He trusted Bozer and had developed a begrudging respect for Accola but still flashes of his partner, hurt and his typical stalwart defenses diminished by medicinal machinations left Jack reeling with deep regret and burdened with the part he played that kept him from being there when Mac needed him. Even worse, he worried it was only a portent of what was to come.
"Jack," Matty breathed, her hand actually snaked out and hovered over his for just a moment, unsure. When Jack looked at her, she removed it quickly, which he appreciated because he had a feeling a rare display of emotion from his ball buster boss might just be the thing to unravel him completely. She did pull a softer expression that had Jack's gut knotting. "He's fine. I promise. He's still battling a fever but they said with his situation that was to be expected."
"That's good." Jack's voice broke slightly and he shook his head. Exhaustion was tugging at him, keeping his emotions on the surface. He'd not managed much sleep in the days since he'd been brought to Zurich, at least not any rest that wasn't plagued by nightmares. Dreams that had Mac's face morphing with the soldiers Jack had lost in battle. Ones where memories were twisted and Jack didn't' make shots that had kept the kid alive and instead had Mac bleeding out in the damn desert. Taunts of Murdoc doing terrible things to the kid, while Jack watched from behind bars he couldn't escape.
"I'm sorry you weren't updated about his condition sooner." Matty's voice broke into his dark thoughts, her frown growing when Jack blinked, giving what he imagined was a bleary-eyed, shell-shocked look. "That was not my idea, and wasn't one I supported."
"James wanted to keep me in the dark." Jack figured that Oversight was getting some sort of pleasure out of withholding the information he would obviously know Jack was anxious to have. It was yet another move in their never ending school yard pissing contest, a counter move in the on-going chess game they had going. Jack had grown quite tired of the manipulation and subversive strategy. Especially when he could see it was taking a toll on his kid.
"Oversight is not happy with how you handled the situation."
Jack laughed. "Damn, Matilda. I'm not happy with how James has handled the last fifteen years. But you don't see me with my boot on his throat."
"No, but from what I understand your gun was pressed against his skull." Her face grew serious once more, a hint of the earlier anger returning along with genuine dismay. "Assault, Jack? Really?"
"It wasn't that dramatic." Jack fisted his hands on the table, the bite of the cuffs a very tangible reminder of what he had done. "I did a hell of a lot worse in Peru."
"When you were under the influence of a very powerful drug, Jack. A drug James helped create. It wasn't like he could hold you at fault then." Matty looked away for a moment and Jack could tell she was struggling to keep her own emotions in check. She returned her focus to him, her gaze unblinking. "Did you, or did you not threaten to shoot him?"
"I did."
She leaned closer, one brow lifting marginally. "Were there unique circumstances of which I'm not aware? I understand you'd just trudged miles carrying Mac on your back. It was freezing out there. And you are still recovering from a recent GSW from your latest mission."
"Do you mean was I drugged out of my mind with painkillers or suffering from hypothermia?"
"Both of those conditions would explain irrational behavior." Matty kept her tone in check, but Jack understood he was being led, offered a possible way out. "Or perhaps you were suffering from a flashback, an irrational moment brought on by the stress of the situation…."
"Shit, Matty," Jack knocked his fists against the table, both appreciative of her gesture, but also insulted by the insinuation. "You and I both know I've had my PTSD under control for years."
"Doesn't mean you couldn't have a relapse." Matty snarled, just as frustrated that Jack wasn't picking up on the breadcrumbs she was offering.
"I'm not going there." Jack would not use his service to his country as an excuse for crossing the line with James. The days he'd battled those demons had been dark, and without Freddie's help and a good support system he might have ended up in jail a long damn time ago, or in the graveyard alongside his dad. Perhaps even by his own hand. He also wouldn't pull the 'crazed vet' card and tarnish the image of men and women who having endured episodes of trauma so great sometimes teetered on the edge of rationality, overcome by anxiety and other illnesses born of their time under extreme stress and hyper awareness.
"Fine." Matty gave him a disappointed glare. "Then you're willing to accept the consequences of your actions."
Jack shrugged, unwilling to back down. "As long as I get to see Mac and call my grandparents and sister before I'm shipped off to a Super Max or wherever Oversight locked Thornton and Murdoc away, then I guess that's exactly what I'm saying."
"You're not going to jail, Jack." Matty rolled her eyes as if he were being ridiculous.
"Forgive me if the last couple of days hasn't lead me to believe that is a definite possibility. There's also the part where James pretty much promised to see me convicted in a court of my peers."
"James has conceded that maybe he was overzealous in the charges he wanted to bring and has agreed to drop them." Matty shifted in her seat and Jack perked up. It was an old tell that she was sitting on a bit of information she didn't want to reveal.
He frowned. "That sounds nothing like the James MacGyver I've come to know and loathe. Why do I feel a giant but attached to the end?"
"Because," Matty hesitated slightly. Her voice lowered and she couldn't mask the regret in her tone. "You're finished at Phoenix. Nothing I nor Mac said could convince James to allow you back on the team. He has pull with the CIA and FBI as you're well aware. You'll most likely be untouchable in the spy game, Jack."
"No big surprise there, Matilda," Jack snorted. In truth, he might have held a tiny glimmer of hope that he'd still be allowed to be the kid's overwatch but that was about as likely as James suddenly stepping down as Oversight and retiring to some remote region of Fiji, forfeiting all rights to Phoenix and more importantly to his son. It wasn't like he'd ever consider going back to The Farm or working for the Fibbies. "Besides, I've always been more G.I. Joe than James Bond." He winked at Matty. "Honestly, darlin', I'm more shocked about the whole not serving time part."
"You have your partner to thank for that," Matty replied, dryly, rolling her eyes at his attempts at being cavalier and typically roguish. "Baby Einstein insisted that any and all charges be dropped and cleared from your service record. And that if you left the foundation, you left with a severance package and an official glowing accommodation for time served at DXS and Phoenix."
"And what the hell did that cost him?" Nonchalance was replaced by a sudden chill that crawled up Jack's spine dragging a quake of dread with it, a malice that spread throughout his body. His fists clenched tighter and every muscle tensed as if he were about to be attacked.
"A year."
"Come again?" Jack furrowed his brow, not understanding what Matty meant.
"MacGyver has to stay at Phoenix for at least a year, serving in the same capacity he has since he joined DXS."
"No way! That's bullshit and freaking blackmail and you know it Matty." It wasn't like Jack wanted the kid to walk away from Phoenix. On the contrary, he believed Mac belonged doing the kind of work they'd been doing for the last five years. But he also believed his partner had the right to choose whether or not he decided to stay on the job. Jack sure as hell didn't want to be the reason he was forced to comply.
"It's negotiations, Jack. Very similar to the negotiation I believe you took part in when you got both you and Mac out of Afghanistan. All those missions you pulled for Joint Forces to ensure his safe delivery from the war took far longer than a year to complete and I have no doubt they were a lot messier than any Mac will be asked to undertake in the line of duty. James isn't going to employ his son to assassinate anyone."
"Still, I made that decision willingly…" Jack would gladly do it again.
"As did Mac," Matty shook her head. "He's not a kid, Dalton. I was there when he went head to head with James. Even from his hospital bed he was a formidable and a bit scary, going to bat for you even when James played dirty. Don't take that victory away from him." She placed a hand on his arm, her voice softening. "Don't take Mac away from Phoenix. You know he belongs there. James MacGyver as Oversight or not."
"But I won't be there to watch his six." It was the sticking point. The one that had tripped Jack up over and over since James revealed himself and returned to establish his place as Mac's parent. Jack could find no way to stay the kid's partner and not go head to head with the kid's daddy.
"Not in the field, per say, but I know you well enough to know there's nothing short of death," she stared pointedly at the shackles on Jack's wrist, "Or misfortunate circumstances, that would keep you out of his life."
"Either I let him go, or I go to jail. Is that it?" Jack growled. James was still in control of the damn board. "James wins either way." More importantly, Mac would lose.
"No. Either you stand by Mac's decision or you undermine him and underestimate him in the same way his pompous father tends to do."
The words stung. Jack felt a bit like Matty had reached out and punched him, or maybe given his ear a heck of a good twist like Nana Beth had been known to do from time to time when Jack was being a hard-headed, near-sighted fool.
"Point taken," he said, finally, with a huff of breath. Good intentions or not, he was poised to hurt his best friend in the same way that James had done, but Jack would be damned if he'd fail Mac in such a way. He would intentionally choose a different path, even if it seemingly took him away from the kid.
Matty raised a brow. "You know I'm on your side. I'll make sure Baby Einstein is always protected on my watch."
Jack met her gaze, his mouth twitching with the first glimmer of hope he'd felt in a while. "You'll let me pick my replacement? Someone I trust?" Jack had a few ideas bouncing around in his head already. People who owed Jack a great debt and ones James had no hold over. One in particular might be just the ticket.
"Officially, I'll be the one picking the boy genius's back-up, but there's nothing that says I can't consult knowledgeable and reputable sources while making that decision."
"Probably more knowledgeable than reputable in this case." Jack's mouth twisted into a full on grin, one which he was unable to hold as the recurring thought that had beleaguered him for months once more loomed like a dark cloud. "I don't trust James not to screw him over, Matty."
"James can be…hard to understand." Matty paused and Jack knew she was choosing her next words carefully. He had no doubt she was in his corner, but he also understood she was loyal to Oversight for reasons he might never fully know. Wookie life debts were complicated beasts. "But one thing I have never doubted is that he loves his son." She held up a quick hand when Jack opened his mouth to contradict her. "I know it may not look like how you love him, Jack, but I can assure you he does indeed care a great deal for Mac. James isn't always right but he does believe he's doing what's in his son's best interest."
Jack finally gave a sharp nod. "I hope to hell you're right."
"I usually am." Matty smirked and before Jack could point out several times that he knew in fact that she hadn't been anywhere close to right, she stood. "Now are you ready to get out of here or what? We're wheels up in twenty."
RcJ
"I told you we should have just waited on the plane," Riley hissed at Bozer. Mac didn't shift his eyes from the door he was watching to look at his teammates, but he could hear them loud and clear, although Riley was attempting some semblance of a whisper.
"You told me!" Bozer returned just as snippily, and without looking Mac knew his roommate was waving his arms in his direction. "Maybe you should have tried telling him."
Mac could feel both their gazes boring into him now and despite experiencing a slight wave of guilt he didn't even turn to acknowledge their stares. They had both been at the hospital with him the last two days and although he appreciated their tireless efforts to take care of him and no doubt somehow fill Jack's shoes, he was not going back to the plane or to LA without his partner. Mac shifted, feeling the uncomfortable pull of stitches in his side.
"He never listens to me." Riley said and her voice was both exasperated and resigned.
"And that's different for me how?" Bozer inquired, clearly not happy.
"You've known him longer."
"Which only means he has had years of practice at dodging my suggestions, creatively twisting promises so that he still does exactly what he wants even though he makes it sound like he's taking my advice to heart." Mac imagined Bozer rolling his eyes dramatically. "Do you think I was happy when he decided to join the Army and defuse bombs for a living? By the time it was all said and done, Mac made it seem like it might have even been my idea."
If Mac had been in possession of the extra energy to insert his version of that story, he would have assured Riley that he had in no way manipulated his oldest friend, but had merely spared his feelings by avoiding an outright dismissal of Bozer's concerns. As it was, Mac was utilizing all his reserves to stay upright in his chair and maintain the image that he was completely well enough to be out of the hospital and out and about. He felt a slight shiver run through him, resisting the urge to pull his jacket tighter around himself. Truthfully, Mac was pretty sure he should be flat on his back in the hospital. He waned quickly a few hours after signing himself out AMA. Even if he hadn't been lulled into thinking he was stronger than he was by the fact he'd managed an unassisted shower and a walk down the hall, as well as eating most of his breakfast, he'd still insisted on being released.
"Well, I'd make it clear to Jack that this was definitely not your idea if you know what's good for you."
"What's he going to do, shoot me?" Bozer quipped and Mac could tell from Riley's silence that she was probably giving a look that conveyed just what Mac had been thinking. The joke was too soon.
"Just remember it's every agent for themselves when the old man gets a look at pale face over there," She finally said and Mac heard Bozer sigh, could practically sense his roommate's slouching into the chair to make himself a smaller target.
Mac did not take the bait to refute his poor condition or her insinuation that they would bear the brunt of Jack's worry, knowing that Riley probably wasn't exaggerating his gray pallor and that his partner would indeed be pissed that Mac had showed up instead of following the instructions Matty had given Riley and Bozer for them all to wait at the plane. He felt like he'd run one of the marathons Jack was always accusing him of completing on a daily basis and he'd only walked from the rental car to the offices of the Kantonspolizei Zurich. Mac rubbed a hand over his face, willing the headache that was nagging him for a few hours to go away.
The non-descript building was not one of the main Cantonal Police's stations but more of an off the books holding facility which Matty had explained was used for international persons of interest, such as suspected perpetrators of federal criminals, mostly white collar, but even suspected terrorists. Shifting in his seat at the thought of his war hero partner locked up with the dregs of civilization, Mac didn't quite manage to hold back on another hiss of pain as his stitches pulled.
"Mac, you alright?"
Mac did glance over at Bozer's concerned inquiry, giving a nod but lacking the energy for reassuring words, before returning his gaze to the doors that the administrative officer had assured them Jack would be coming through at any moment. He heard his roommate huff out another breath a sure sign of his frustration at Mac's nonverbal response. It was warranted, Mac knew. He had been mostly uncommunicative since being informed of what all had transpired after he'd undergone surgery in Albinen. Even as he realized his silence was probably maddening for his friends, not to mention another reason for their concern and doting, he couldn't quite bring himself to exert much effort to remedy it. Except for the conversation he'd had with Oversight concerning Jack's fate, Mac didn't see much need in talking to anyone-not until he'd seen his partner. He ran a hand over his eyes, when his vision started to waver a little, ignoring the slight shaking of his hand, his head pounding.
He wasn't sure what that conversation might hold as it was one he'd never expected to have, imagining that he and Jack would be leaving Phoenix together or not at all, especially after what happened in Costa Rica and Peru. Mac had spent the last twenty-four hours contemplating every angle of their problem and had yet to come up with any alternate solution to what they were facing. As anxious as he was to see for himself that Jack was fine, he also almost dreaded the face to face, to witness Jack's possible disappointment that for once Mac's improvisation had failed to save them. He wasn't given any more time to consider the ramifications as a buzzer sounded alerting that the heavy metal door before them was about to open.
Riley and Bozer stood, practically snapping to attention as Matty was the first one through. She did not look happy to find a welcoming party.
"I see the gangs all here." Her narrowed, unflinching gaze went from Bozer and Riley to Mac, voice dripping with feigned astonishment. "Color me completely surprised."
Mac made it to his feet just as Jack stepped into the room. He had attempted a measured shift from sitting to upright but in his haste hadn't quite managed. The room tilted and black dots appeared on his peripheral as he was forced to remember the fresh incision at his side, blood was rushing in his ears, bile burning in the back of his throat.
"Mac." Jack was in front of him instantly in what appeared to be a defying of Newton's Laws of Physics. In reality it was possible Mac had blanked out for a few seconds, overcome by a bout of dizziness that had him reflexively squeezing his eyes shut. The first thing he became aware of was Jack's firm grip on his shoulders, his best friend guiding him right back down to the chair Mac had moved from. "What the hell are you doing here, kid?"
"That's a very good question," Matty seconded. Mac opened his eyes, but kept them on Jack's very concerned features as their director expounded. "I recall giving orders for the three of you to go straight to the plane after you were released and to stay there."
"I was just following a previous order given to me by Jack that I was to stay with Mac. No. Matter. What." Bozer justified, crossing his arms over his chest.
"I had to drive them because Mac threatened to walk if I didn't," Riley added, although not as confident or enthusiastically as Bozer's defense had been.
Mac didn't repudiate, which had Jack shaking his head, raising a brow, his hands releasing Mac's shoulders. "You really think it's a good idea to go for a stroll so soon after major surgery, hoss? Someone all too recently shoved your insides around and cut out a piece or two. There's a recovery window there, you know."
"No man left behind." Mac held Jack's gaze, not even realizing he'd wrapped his fingers in the sleeve of Jack's shirt. The very 'Jack-like' description of his appendectomy had him swallowing hard as a wave of nausea rolled over him. His voice was scratchy, and he had to clear his throat before looking up at Matty to add, "No offense, but I needed to be here to make sure he was released." It wasn't Matty that Mac didn't trust, but Oversight.
"Right." Matty pressed her lips together before giving a slight tilt of her head in concession. She whipped her gaze to Mac's other teammates, eyes narrowing once more. "Come on you two. Let's go have a private conversation in the car about whose orders you need to follow first and foremost, shall we."
Mac appreciated the gesture and he caught Bozer's gaze as he walked close enough to pat Jack on the back. Jack looked up at him and winked. "You owe me one," he mouthed. Mac wasn't sure which one of them he was talking to but Jack gave a grin and a small salute.
His partner's smile faded quickly when they were left alone, a worried frown appearing on his forehead.
"Damn, kid, what the hell am I going to do with you?"
"I'm sorry." The words spilled out and Mac realized he'd been repeating them on silent replay for a long while. It had become a personal, private mantra since Costa Rica, since Peru. Since Mexico even, where everything had seemed to shift with his father's words about Afghanistan-'who do you think arranged for you two to be paired together?' Mac knew eventually something had to give, the situation between Oversight and Jack had grown tense over the last few months. But he couldn't quite stop wondering if him falling sick on their latest mission hadn't sped things along drastically. "I'm so sorry," he repeated, anguished.
Jack's frown deepened. "Now why do I get the feeling this isn't an apology for you giving me more gray hair with your most recent disregard for your health and well-being?" He took the seat next to Mac, looking as tired and worn as Mac had seen him, but his face was filled with concern only for Mac. "How are you really doing, kiddo? You look like hell."
Mac ducked the hand that actually tried to reach out and gauge his temperature. He was not in the mood for coddling or to be the focus of his partner's worry. One of his hands curled over his middle when the sudden movement elicited new pain in his side. "I'm fine," came out sharper than he intended.
"Right." Jack smirked at the typical and likely anticipated comeback, his eyes moving over Mac's face in a close onceover.
"I am," Mac said again, gentler this time. Bozer had explained how no one had told Jack anything over the last two days. Not even Matty had the authority to contact him, which meant he'd had no word on Mac's condition or what was happening outside the holding facility. It was obviously a purposive move, a power play on James's part, one that would have been completely effective against Jack. The fact Jack had days to ruminate on what could be happening only added to Mac's guilt. He shrugged, not meeting the older man's gaze. "It was a routine appendectomy."
"Performed in a backwoods clinic, by an alcoholic doctor who I didn't trust as far as I could throw him." Jack rubbed his eyes, blinking. "Forgive me for being a little doubtful about you tossing around the word 'routine' when I happen to know you're a walking worst case scenario even in the best of settings."
Mac ignored his best friend's hyperbole. There were much bigger issues at hand. He turned slightly so he was facing Jack, who'd dropped his hand to his lap with a shake of his head."I guess Matty told you I couldn't get my father to see reason."
"Director Weber told me that thanks to my partner's smooth negation skills Oversight agreed not to press charges concerning my most recent insubordination." Jack arched a brow, his dark gaze emphasizing that Mac should heed to his careful reframing, which of course alleviated any blame on Mac's part.
"Charges that were personally motivated, justified or not." Mac couldn't help but to counter. As much as Jack might want him to believe they were dealing with a professional crisis, that was not the case. James was Oversight, but he was also Mac's father, and Mac was sure that that more than any sense of duty or adherence to procedure fueled his motives.
"Dude, I pulled a gun on a superior with all intentions of using it. I stepped across the line. Remember that time I punched the MP and Hammond made sure I spent the weekend in the stockade? This is the same kind of deal." Jack ran a hand over his bearded face, blowing out air in a long breath. "Hell, I obliterated a few dozen lines this go around. I was in dereliction of duty a dozen ways to Sunday and if you weren't hurting and half delirious with a fever you'd realize it."
"What I realize is that you did what you did because of me," Mac insisted, finally meeting Jack's piercing gaze. Jack was correct. It was like when he'd punched the MP, an MP who'd gotten a little too hands-on with one certain Delta's EOD. "You were protecting me."
"Which is why I'm not one bit sorry about what I did." Mac watched his partner will his fists to unclench. He reached out and briefly squeezed Mac's shoulder. When Mac didn't evade the touch and in fact leaned into it slightly, he nodded with a half smile. "I'd do it again, bud, even if it meant a worse punishment than the one I got. The one I dodged because of you. I should be thanking you, kid. Or apologizing. I'm pretty sure both is warranted considering I broke a promise when I wasn't around when you came to."
"You were fired from Phoenix, Jack." Mac didn't want a thank you or any apology. He rubbed a hand over his forehead, the throbbing behind his temple not making it easy to think. Mac felt another slight shiver racing down his spine.
"Which is a lot better than sitting in a Super Max across from our old boss, Thornton, or worse, sharing a cellblock with your buddy Murdoc." Jack removed his hand, bringing it back to his lap, where he laced it with his other. He leaned forward on his elbows, giving a sigh. "The way I see it, you saved me, bud. Just like always."
"Then why does it feel like I've lost you." Mac clenched his jaw. He had not meant to let those particular words escape, but like earlier he seemed to have little control. It was the fear he'd been trying to wrangle back in the box for months. He blamed the drugs still in his system that it had slipped free to take on a power of its own. The stupid drugs that had been a necessary evil if he was going to be able to get out of bed and move around. Maybe the fever he was still struggling to shake and the accompanying exhaustion were co-conspirators in his downfall, but whatever the reason he silently cursed his weakness as Jack turned a stunned gaze to him.
"Mac, you haven't lost any damn thing." Jack sat up straighter, his voice gentle but somehow as resolute and convicted as when he was issuing a command in battle. "I'm not going anywhere. Nothing. No one. could make me leave. We're family. Our circumstances may change, but that doesn't waver. Got it?"
Mac wanted to say yes, to affirm that he whole-heartedly, one hundred percent believed what his best friend, his brother, was saying, but his past stood directly in his way of doing so. A daunting reality of abandonment and failed promises proved a hurdle too great to easily leap over.
"But what will you do?" Was what Mac got out instead, a request for proof that Jack had a plan. He hated that he couldn't just blindly trust, but it wasn't how he was wired. Mac swallowed, clearing his throat when his voice threatened to break.
Jack's smile, although a little sad was tolerant, proving he hadn't expected a quick affirmation of acceptance, even if he might have hoped his words would elicit such a response. "I don't know, bud, but I have options. There are lots of jobs out there for a man with a skillset like mine."
Mac furrowed his brow, attempting to cross arms over his chest, but finding it too painful to do so because it pulled on his incision. He settled for narrowing his gaze. "Jack you're a trained sniper, tactical expert and intelligence operative….of a certain age." Jack pulled a face at the mention of his years of experience but Mac continued on undaunted. "Not exactly points in your favor when it comes to a resume in a new career field with Joe Public."
"So, kindergarten teacher is out of the question, although if Arnold Schwarzenegger could do it…" Jack rolled his eyes when Mac continued to frown. He held up his hands in a placating manner when he obviously realized the joke fell flat. "Mac, I promise I'll find some way to come up with the rent on time each month if that's what's eating at you. I'll even manage my share of the utilities and groceries, as long as you count Doritos and beer as having nutritional value."
"Rent?" Mac shook his head, convinced he might have zoned out again. His head was fuzzy, but he was sure he had been tracking the conversation just fine up until that point.
"Yeah, rent, kid. I'm not a mooch, no matter what Bozer says." Jack grinned in the face of Mac's flummoxed expression. "Wait and see. You won't even have time to miss me at Phoenix seeing as how we'll be roommates and all. Just don't count on me donning that stupid apron of Bozer's to have dinner waiting for you, and we'll have to work out a code when one of us has a lady over, but…"
"You're moving in?" Mac rubbed a hand over his eyes, feeling his vision waver once more. He wasn't sure how they'd veered so of course of the subject at hand, but Jack was a master of redirection when it suited him.
"Unless you don't want me to. Don't tell me you've already made plans for the spare room after Bozer moves in with his girl. Some secret science lab or, a naked room like Terry Bradshaw wanted in that movie with…"
"A what? No…" Mac shook his head, dazed by the bizarre shift in conversation and the disturbing image of Terry Bradshaw in the buff. He wasn't even aware Bozer was officially moving out. He blinked, finally giving in to his body's need of putting some strain off his side by slumping slightly forward. "I want you to move in, it's just not what I expected."
"Well, now, that's the kick in the nuts now isn't it, brother." Jack reached out and squeezed Mac's shoulder again. "Life never is exactly what we expected." The older man's grin faded slightly when Mac met his gaze with what he imagined was a version of what Jack liked to call his 'kicked puppy look'. "Things don't always go according to our grand plan but you know what, I sure as hell didn't bank on another tour in Afghanistan all those years ago when a certain bomb nerd showed up in my barracks messing with my stuff, but look how great that turned out."
Mac blinked, hating the edge of desperation in his voice. "But what about your plan to retire to Hawaii, and open up the private security firm on Oahu?"
"Damn, hoss, I think I can hold on for another year." Jack laughed, letting him go and Mac could see the bone-weary exhaustion in his partner but also sensed his acceptance. "I'm not that old."
"A lot can happen in a year, Jack." Mac still couldn't quite wrap his mind around what work at Phoenix would look like without Jack watching his back. Jack had been his overwatch for so long, any other scenario seemed an impossible fit.
"We'll figure it out, Shepherd. I promise." When Mac looked up in surprise at the rarely used nickname from their days in the desert, Jack's gaze was resolute and unflinching, conveying the mooring Mac had been grappling to find. The call sign, just like the first time Jack had used it, had become something of a metaphorical buoy, a life line. It didn't instantly bring back a wealth of bad memories as one might imagine, instead It brought a reminder that not only had Mac been officially adopted into the Delta family all those years ago, but that he'd also instantly become so much more than the know it all, pain in the ass, EOD Jack was assigned to watch over. They were brothers. And that had nothing to do with James MacGyver so there was nothing he could in fact do to change it. Jack gave him a knowing nod. "I'm not abandoning my post. I swear."
Mac swallowed again, his emotions choking him up this time. "You know my deal with Oversight was so much better than the lame ass one you made with Joint Forces to get us out of the sandbox, right?"
Jack laughed out loud, which had been Mac's aim. "Well, color me surprised," he said, stealing Matty's words and her feigned incredulity from before. Jack stood, offering Mac a hand up. "You've always been a whole hell of a lot smarter than me, Butch. Using that big old brain is what you do best."
Jack didn't give Mac a chance to refute him before he pointed a finger. "Except when it comes to taking care of yourself. Then, you regress in IQ to somewhere around a first grader."
Mac gripped his partner's proffered hand and allowed the assist, swallowing a hiss of pain when the stitches in his side pulled yet again. Having surgery sucked. "I'll have you know I could recite the periodic table and the properties of all the elements when I was six, Sundance."
Jack's grin widened, teeth flashing. "Well now, that sure didn't stop you from not wanting to get your tonsils out, now did it."
"What? How did you know about that?" Mac didn't even bother with a protest when once he was standing Jack slid a hand around his back to keep him steady, shouldering his weight.
"Oversight." Jack's voice hardened, brows drawing together. "Thanks to his unhelpful reminiscing I kept envisioning six-year- old, mussed hair, sleepy-eyed Mac waking up from this latest surgery, traumatized when I wasn't there like some favorite, counted-on woobie. Believe me, it sucked."
Mac couldn't hold back on the laugh as he was pretty certain Jack needed absolutely no prompting whatsoever from James MacGyver to envision him as that same little, defenseless kid anytime Mac was hurt, sometimes even when he wasn't. He couldn't bring himself to reprimand Jack for the embarrassing image of him as a child or for the conjured one of Jack as some well-loved, worn, one-eyed stuffed bear counted on for security, deciding instead to cut him some slack. "If it makes you feel better, man, the one thing that stands out vividly from having my tonsils out is Harry sneaking in a whole gallon of Rocky Road ice cream. He let me eat as much as I wanted."
"Really?" Jack shot him a doubtful look, one that still held a small trace of the pain he must have genuinely experienced when he was unable to be there for Mac when he believed his partner needed him. It was proof that the coming year would be hard on both of them.
For that very reason alone, Mac would never mention to Jack what else he remembered from that time in the hospital all those years ago, the terror of waking up alone in a room all too similar to the one where his mother had so recently died, hooked to machines he didn't understand that made noises which sometimes still provided a backdrop to his nightmares. Instead, he offered a smile ignoring the pain in his gut that had nothing to do with the all too recent incision in his side and everything to do with the fear that the security he'd learned to count on was going to be cruelly, but predictably torn away.
His best friend still looked dubious, so Mac bumped against him, rolling his eyes when Jack glanced over at him. "Really, Tombstone. What's better than Rocky Road ice cream?"
RcJ
to be continued...
